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By *xhib12Man
over a year ago
Blyth |
"Has anyone ever had one used on them by a woman? Like a blatant one?"
I had a young lady say to me after just a couple of drinks so knowing each other for about an hour or so, "do you want to come back to mine for a fuck and a pizza"?
How could I possibly refuse? Never did get the pizza though!
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By *an_LexaCouple
over a year ago
Sunderland |
I got a message yesterday
“Have you sat in a plate of chilli sauce, coz that arse is hot”
That was terrible as are most, in fact I can’t think of one that makes me go fuck yeah and drop my knickers |
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By *ot-AshMan
over a year ago
London |
Did you used to work in the desert as you look really hot!
There is a problem with my phone, it hasn't got your number on it.
Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Me neither i just thought it might help break the ice! |
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"This face leaves in 5 minutes...be on it. Not one of my lines though!
This is a cracker!"
Talking of crackers.....
Guy tells a girl I know your surname...
No you don't...
Yes I do... Its Jacob's coz you're a cracker
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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2 much older ladies after a night out, through the window of my taxi:
"If you let us get this taxi with you, we'll give you a blowjob."
Safe to say I told the taxi driver to put his foot down! (Wish I hadn't)  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Come on what’s the best chat up lines u have said/heard?"
Do you know the way you curl your index finger open and closed at somebody as to say come here?
Do that with your little finger. When the woman comes over say if I can make you come with my little finger just imagine what I can do with the rest of my body. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Was your dad a retarded ?
as your definitely special  "
That must work wonders
I did once click my fingers, then waved her over, but that was 30 years ago,
The |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I send a knock knock joke
Which only works if u get the who's there response..
Knock knock
Who's there
Do u want 2 cd's
Do u want 2cd'S who
Do u want to see deez pics?
Then I attach a face pic or 2
Either crash or burn with that 1 |
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"Was your dad a retarded ?
as your definitely special
That must work wonders
I did once click my fingers, then waved her over, but that was 30 years ago,
The"
If you don’t hey slapped it’s a great ice breaker!  |
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The worst one I ever saw work was said by a friend. He did the come over here thing with index finger. When she came over he said "I just made you cum with one finger, imagine what I can do with both hands"
Really wish it wasn't true |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A friend invited two girls to join us with the line' Would you and your friend like to join us for a drink with a view to sexual intercourse?' It was one of those kill me now moments.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Was your dad a retarded ?
as your definitely special
That must work wonders
I did once click my fingers, then waved her over, but that was 30 years ago,
The
If you don’t hey slapped it’s a great ice breaker! "
Only tried it the one time, but it did work, |
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