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Splitting up
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I've recently split up, and after a few weeks I've blocked her on here. We are still friends off of here but I'm not ready to see or think about her swinging. Not saying she shouldn't, but anyway she is upset with me for blocking her on here. Was I wrong to do it? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No matter what you do you never get these things right for both of you ... its just not an easy time... best just to do whats right for you and let her do the same |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We all have different opinions. Sometimes similar, sometimes different.
There’s no right or wrong.
It would be wrong if you go knock on her door to fuck her without notifying her in advanced.
This happened to me few days ago as well. Nothing happened but all of a sudden told me we should go separate ways.
Weird and could be wrong, the seperation makes me want to fuck her even more
My logical mind says: walk it off, look for better experiences.
Good luck to you finding someone else or talk her through it |
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"I've recently split up, and after a few weeks I've blocked her on here. We are still friends off of here but I'm not ready to see or think about her swinging. Not saying she shouldn't, but anyway she is upset with me for blocking her on here. Was I wrong to do it? "
The only person who can decide if you are right or wrong is you. No one else, for reasons I just c.b.a to go into in a forum.
HOWEVERRRRRR... you remain her friend offline sooooooo there is no reason to block her on here.
ALSOOOOOO..... you say you are not ready to think about her swinging which is a very roundabout way of saying you are jealous.
Hung by your own hypocrisy i'd say but then there are more 'swingers' than you who get the hump when their partner 'swings' or leave when they find someone to shag and all of a sudden become vanilla....
Upshot is you don't want her to have anyone else.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I split from my ex last year. My approach has been to try and do it cleanly, politely, and unemotionally. This can come off as a bit cold and clinical. But it's much better than the alternative. I would've done the same  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've recently split up, and after a few weeks I've blocked her on here. We are still friends off of here but I'm not ready to see or think about her swinging. Not saying she shouldn't, but anyway she is upset with me for blocking her on here. Was I wrong to do it?
The only person who can decide if you are right or wrong is you. No one else, for reasons I just c.b.a to go into in a forum.
HOWEVERRRRRR... you remain her friend offline sooooooo there is no reason to block her on here.
ALSOOOOOO..... you say you are not ready to think about her swinging which is a very roundabout way of saying you are jealous.
Hung by your own hypocrisy i'd say but then there are more 'swingers' than you who get the hump when their partner 'swings' or leave when they find someone to shag and all of a sudden become vanilla....
Upshot is you don't want her to have anyone else.
"
Bit harsh ... they have just broken up ... its still raw and he doesnt want to see her move on surely thats normal |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"I've recently split up, and after a few weeks I've blocked her on here. We are still friends off of here but I'm not ready to see or think about her swinging. Not saying she shouldn't, but anyway she is upset with me for blocking her on here. Was I wrong to do it? "
There is no right or wrong, you have to think what is right for you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've recently split up, and after a few weeks I've blocked her on here. We are still friends off of here but I'm not ready to see or think about her swinging. Not saying she shouldn't, but anyway she is upset with me for blocking her on here. Was I wrong to do it?
The only person who can decide if you are right or wrong is you. No one else, for reasons I just c.b.a to go into in a forum.
HOWEVERRRRRR... you remain her friend offline sooooooo there is no reason to block her on here.
ALSOOOOOO..... you say you are not ready to think about her swinging which is a very roundabout way of saying you are jealous.
Hung by your own hypocrisy i'd say but then there are more 'swingers' than you who get the hump when their partner 'swings' or leave when they find someone to shag and all of a sudden become vanilla....
Upshot is you don't want her to have anyone else.
"
Harsh!!
They've just split up and he doesn't want his nose rubbed in to when she starts displaying veri's.
I think you've done the right thing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I understand I think it’s easier on here for women to ‘move on’ but I did block my ex Fb and now we are friends again. Only you can answer the question in all honesty and it’s your life, you need to do what makes you happy. She needs to understand that it’s difficult right now for you but hopefully it won’t always be that way |
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"I've recently split up, and after a few weeks I've blocked her on here. We are still friends off of here but I'm not ready to see or think about her swinging. Not saying she shouldn't, but anyway she is upset with me for blocking her on here. Was I wrong to do it? "
Yeah totally |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not harsh at all.
Your last line says he doesn't want her to move on......
says just what I said ... self interest."
No i said he doesnt want to watch it ... thats not the same thing ... and self interest can wither be self care or selfish ... again not the same thing |
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"I've recently split up, and after a few weeks I've blocked her on here. We are still friends off of here but I'm not ready to see or think about her swinging. Not saying she shouldn't, but anyway she is upset with me for blocking her on here. Was I wrong to do it?
The only person who can decide if you are right or wrong is you. No one else, for reasons I just c.b.a to go into in a forum.
HOWEVERRRRRR... you remain her friend offline sooooooo there is no reason to block her on here.
ALSOOOOOO..... you say you are not ready to think about her swinging which is a very roundabout way of saying you are jealous.
Hung by your own hypocrisy i'd say but then there are more 'swingers' than you who get the hump when their partner 'swings' or leave when they find someone to shag and all of a sudden become vanilla....
Upshot is you don't want her to have anyone else.
Harsh!!
They've just split up and he doesn't want his nose rubbed in to when she starts displaying veri's.
I think you've done the right thing. "
Realistic.
He doesn't have to peek at any veri's she has. |
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"I've recently split up, and after a few weeks I've blocked her on here. We are still friends off of here but I'm not ready to see or think about her swinging. Not saying she shouldn't, but anyway she is upset with me for blocking her on here. Was I wrong to do it?
The only person who can decide if you are right or wrong is you. No one else, for reasons I just c.b.a to go into in a forum.
HOWEVERRRRRR... you remain her friend offline sooooooo there is no reason to block her on here.
ALSOOOOOO..... you say you are not ready to think about her swinging which is a very roundabout way of saying you are jealous.
Hung by your own hypocrisy i'd say but then there are more 'swingers' than you who get the hump when their partner 'swings' or leave when they find someone to shag and all of a sudden become vanilla....
Upshot is you don't want her to have anyone else.
"
There maybe truth in this. But it's not that I'm jealous it's more like I don't want to see her like that anymore just as friends. |
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"Not harsh at all.
Your last line says he doesn't want her to move on......
says just what I said ... self interest.
No i said he doesnt want to watch it ... thats not the same thing ... and self interest can wither be self care or selfish ... again not the same thing"
Well he doesn't have to keep watching what she's doing.
He made the choice to block her. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Not harsh at all.
Your last line says he doesn't want her to move on......
says just what I said ... self interest."
There is also a difference between swinging with your partner where they sleep with other people and your partner leaving you completely... so sticking inverted commas around ‘swinging’ like he is just some jealous guy that said he wantes to swing but cant cope with his gf fucking someone else is also uncalled for |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not harsh at all.
Your last line says he doesn't want her to move on......
says just what I said ... self interest.
No i said he doesnt want to watch it ... thats not the same thing ... and self interest can wither be self care or selfish ... again not the same thing
Well he doesn't have to keep watching what she's doing.
He made the choice to block her. "
Which you suggested he was wrong to do |
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"I've recently split up, and after a few weeks I've blocked her on here. We are still friends off of here but I'm not ready to see or think about her swinging. Not saying she shouldn't, but anyway she is upset with me for blocking her on here. Was I wrong to do it?
The only person who can decide if you are right or wrong is you. No one else, for reasons I just c.b.a to go into in a forum.
HOWEVERRRRRR... you remain her friend offline sooooooo there is no reason to block her on here.
ALSOOOOOO..... you say you are not ready to think about her swinging which is a very roundabout way of saying you are jealous.
Hung by your own hypocrisy i'd say but then there are more 'swingers' than you who get the hump when their partner 'swings' or leave when they find someone to shag and all of a sudden become vanilla....
Upshot is you don't want her to have anyone else.
There maybe truth in this. But it's not that I'm jealous it's more like I don't want to see her like that anymore just as friends. "
Thanks for the reasoned response. When you say 'like that' do you mean you don't want to meet sexually ? Or do you mean you don't want to see what she's getting up to with others ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Not harsh at all.
Your last line says he doesn't want her to move on......
says just what I said ... self interest.
No i said he doesnt want to watch it ... thats not the same thing ... and self interest can wither be self care or selfish ... again not the same thing
Well he doesn't have to keep watching what she's doing.
He made the choice to block her. "
Not always that easy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I've recently split up, and after a few weeks I've blocked her on here. We are still friends off of here but I'm not ready to see or think about her swinging. Not saying she shouldn't, but anyway she is upset with me for blocking her on here. Was I wrong to do it?
The only person who can decide if you are right or wrong is you. No one else, for reasons I just c.b.a to go into in a forum.
HOWEVERRRRRR... you remain her friend offline sooooooo there is no reason to block her on here.
ALSOOOOOO..... you say you are not ready to think about her swinging which is a very roundabout way of saying you are jealous.
Hung by your own hypocrisy i'd say but then there are more 'swingers' than you who get the hump when their partner 'swings' or leave when they find someone to shag and all of a sudden become vanilla....
Upshot is you don't want her to have anyone else.
Harsh!!
They've just split up and he doesn't want his nose rubbed in to when she starts displaying veri's.
I think you've done the right thing.
Realistic.
He doesn't have to peek at any veri's she has. "
Realistic ... the number of women on here is much smallwr than men ... if they live local it would probably show up on his newsfeed without looking for it ... unless he blocks her which he did |
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"Not harsh at all.
Your last line says he doesn't want her to move on......
says just what I said ... self interest.
No i said he doesnt want to watch it ... thats not the same thing ... and self interest can wither be self care or selfish ... again not the same thing
Well he doesn't have to keep watching what she's doing.
He made the choice to block her.
Which you suggested he was wrong to do "
Please feel free to re read the first thing I said to him ......
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I've recently split up, and after a few weeks I've blocked her on here. We are still friends off of here but I'm not ready to see or think about her swinging. Not saying she shouldn't, but anyway she is upset with me for blocking her on here. Was I wrong to do it? "
Why is she upset with you? Who split up with who?
I think you should do what makes you happy. It can be horrible seeing an ex moving on if you still have feelings for them.
Can you have an adult conversation with her about it face to face? Clearing the air definitely helps. |
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"Not harsh at all.
Your last line says he doesn't want her to move on......
says just what I said ... self interest.
No i said he doesnt want to watch it ... thats not the same thing ... and self interest can wither be self care or selfish ... again not the same thing
Well he doesn't have to keep watching what she's doing.
He made the choice to block her.
Not always that easy "
Agree. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Not harsh at all.
Your last line says he doesn't want her to move on......
says just what I said ... self interest.
No i said he doesnt want to watch it ... thats not the same thing ... and self interest can wither be self care or selfish ... again not the same thing
Well he doesn't have to keep watching what she's doing.
He made the choice to block her.
Which you suggested he was wrong to do
Please feel free to re read the first thing I said to him ......
"
Followed by the 3 paragraphs where you call him a hypocrite and suggest he is just jealous and controlling? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Dump the piercings, drive 50 miles, and I'll make you feel better 
Best advice yet. But I'm out of your age range. Xx"
Dude, just go. Have a chat, a drink, relax your mind. Don’t let those limits control you
Have a good time
Have a relaxing weekend
Don’t fall into the tunnel vision.
If I had that kind of offer I’d be in my car now |
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"Dump the piercings, drive 50 miles, and I'll make you feel better
Best advice yet. But I'm out of your age range. Xx
Dude, just go. Have a chat, a drink, relax your mind. Don’t let those limits control you
Have a good time
Have a relaxing weekend
Don’t fall into the tunnel vision.
If I had that kind of offer I’d be in my car now"
As in I'm not the age she wants. Otherwise I'd have messaged her. Lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Dump the piercings, drive 50 miles, and I'll make you feel better
Best advice yet. But I'm out of your age range. Xx
Dude, just go. Have a chat, a drink, relax your mind. Don’t let those limits control you
Have a good time
Have a relaxing weekend
Don’t fall into the tunnel vision.
If I had that kind of offer I’d be in my car now
As in I'm not the age she wants. Otherwise I'd have messaged her. Lol"
Patiently wait for her to see your comments
If you’ll write another comment/reply to her asking her to message you first |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Dump the piercings, drive 50 miles, and I'll make you feel better
Best advice yet. But I'm out of your age range. Xx"
That will teach me to peek without wearing glasses, I thought you were 49 not 39 D'oh  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Dump the piercings, drive 50 miles, and I'll make you feel better
Best advice yet. But I'm out of your age range. Xx
That will teach me to peek without wearing glasses, I thought you were 49 not 39 D'oh "
Mail him.  |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"Dump the piercings, drive 50 miles, and I'll make you feel better
Best advice yet. But I'm out of your age range. Xx
That will teach me to peek without wearing glasses, I thought you were 49 not 39 D'oh "
Go for it you two! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I don't drive so that's a bugger as well. Lol
Thanks guys for all the support and advice. I was going to unblock her but now definitely not. Happy fabbing "
Get you an uber, bike, train, whatever that get you there.
Soph, please meet him
That’s the least the two of you could do good for me as well as I just got dumped few days ago lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Bit childish to block, surely if your still friends out with the site what difference does it make."
It’s not childish to protect your own feelings or to feel better is it? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You would be better blocking her from all means of contact as then she will get the message and give you a better chance to clear your mind OP.
That's what we would do and have done in the past.
Blocking isn't childish, it's often needed. It's a way of dealing with things and moving onto things bigger and better in life.
Hope you feel clearer in your mind soon OP. |
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"Bit childish to block, surely if your still friends out with the site what difference does it make.
It’s not childish to protect your own feelings or to feel better is it?"
If the OP hasn't cut contact with her off site then he isn't protecting his feelings or making himself feel better. It should be all or nothing. |
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"If you feel that way, then what you’ve done is right imo. Otherwise you’d just be torturing yourself. "
+1
Same when on facebook etc.. seeing pics of your fb / ex moving on meeting people verification photos etc.. mental torture |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Dump the piercings, drive 50 miles, and I'll make you feel better
Best advice yet. But I'm out of your age range. Xx"
Get in your self in your car , and go, them offers are rare |
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Ive just split up from sombody on here ,never new if he was telling the truth ,always at work and had to message him on here untill i moaned at him to call me ,he said we will stay friends but deleted me as a friend ,i dont care who he meets in the end i wish them luck lol |
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"If you feel that way, then what you’ve done is right imo. Otherwise you’d just be torturing yourself.
+1
Same when on facebook etc.. seeing pics of your fb / ex moving on meeting people verification photos etc.. mental torture "
I was absolutely delighted when my ex went into a new relationship. Absolutely zero negative feelings and still not to this day exactly a year later. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well if anyone is still interested pointless blocking to hid from the pain. The smoke signals where out in force today. Thanks for all you support guys"
But she’s probably doing it to upset you. You’re still protecting yourself from the detail. Stay strong. I think you did the right thing. It will take a while. |
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"Well if anyone is still interested pointless blocking to hid from the pain. The smoke signals where out in force today. Thanks for all you support guys
Ooh, what does that mean? "
It means mutual acquaintances saw her at a club and told me. ?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When feelings are involved nothing is ever simple.
I’ve broken up with someone on here previously and blocked/unblocked/blocked again, except this time he’s remained blocked and it’s worked.
I’ve also stayed friends with another guy and I see what a total cockwomble he is now so wouldn’t go back there for this reason.
I think you have done the right thing but can you now stay strong enough and control your own emotions?
Remember you broke up for a reason |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"Well if anyone is still interested pointless blocking to hid from the pain. The smoke signals where out in force today. Thanks for all you support guys
Ooh, what does that mean?
It means mutual acquaintances saw her at a club and told me. ?? "
Ok, Maybe it would be better if those mutual acquaintances didn't mention that to you... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To stop the pain quick, stop the heart.
Block. Block everyone you need to not hear about it.
Worse case, make a group of new friends.
Too extreme? If that’s what it takes for you to feel comfortable again |
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