FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > The benefits of being married
The benefits of being married
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Whilst it shows you like someone more, is it more a practicality? I heard that when some divorce it could be a nightmare to get the house from the other half, whats your view, whats the pros and cons? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I saw one I liked on Facebook this morning:
'Marriage: an endless sleepover with your favourite wierdo!'.
Marriage should be fun - the only thing I really miss about my ex is the play, we used to play all the time. And the hugs - he was an epic hugger. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Whilst it shows you like someone more, is it more a practicality? I heard that when some divorce it could be a nightmare to get the house from the other half, whats your view, whats the pros and cons? "
My view of marriage is it's being part of a team, someone's always got your back, as commiserator or cheerleader. Heading through life together with your best friend and partner. Sometimes it's shit, yep. But mostly it's lovely.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Marriage should be both of you, as a team working together. Communicating, honesty and giving each other emotional support. My soon to be ex never really understood this... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There are plenty of people who enjoy being married. Isn’t it proven to be better for men’s health ? I’m sure I read that somewhere. "
Yes biit that was a woman that said it and they are alwayd right |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Marriage should be both of you, as a team working together. Communicating, honesty and giving each other emotional support. My soon to be ex never really understood this..."
Absolutely right. I tied the knot this wkend and belive the same qualities you've mentioned. Sorry to hear of your separation.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Whilst it shows you like someone more, is it more a practicality? I heard that when some divorce it could be a nightmare to get the house from the other half, whats your view, whats the pros and cons? "
you get your dinner cooked your shirts ironed your kids looked after and your house cleaned it's amazing
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There are plenty of people who enjoy being married. Isn’t it proven to be better for men’s health ? I’m sure I read that somewhere. "
They get a new mama to look after them  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
i've had friends who were couples where one half of the couple have tragically passed away. the remaining unmarried partner lost everything as the next of kin were beneficiaries to the deceased's estate |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
The main benefits are someone to put your cold feet on in bed, someone to make you a cup of tea when you're ill, when you're having a horrible day there's someone at home to sit quietly doing this  while you rant and rave and sex.
I don't know what benefits Mr N gets the poor chap but I do make him sandwiches while he's busy putting up with me. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Someone to make me laugh.
Someone to make me see reason when I'm being a tit and still love me.
Not married but been together an eternity so as good as.
Mrs.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I saw one I liked on Facebook this morning:
'Marriage: an endless sleepover with your favourite wierdo!'.
Marriage should be fun - the only thing I really miss about my ex is the play, we used to play all the time. And the hugs - he was an epic hugger."
Aww I love that! Every night I'm so happy I get to sleep beside my favourite weirdo  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Our 30th wedding anniversary today...
We still wind each other up, make each other laugh,cry and most importantly tea! ( cake is optional..)
But seriously we simply still care "
congratulations |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
A lot of the time I hate being single and feel like happy ever after won't happen for me.
However I overhead this couple out for dinner at the weekend. He says " I'm going to the tip tomorrow, would you like to come with me."
He looked so pleased and I could practically hear her eyes roll...
Seriously, if that's marriage you can keep it ! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Benefits: practicality
As mentioned above. If it’s long term and you’re living together it’s a legal nightmare if you’re not married and one of you dies. My ex would get everything and we have been separated a long time! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Depends on who you marry and why I married for something normal compared to abnormal cant go into details as to what was abnormal but the lady I married did it for show not love as I did not do it for love either so separated and are divorcing so wasted both our time. so getting married is love and commitment with the right person. now im in a relationship with my first girlfriend of 16. 23years later the best thing I ever did BUT marriage again nope im committed with or wothout it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Marriage is basically a lifelong competition between who has worked harder, whose turn it is to wash up, who has had less sleep and who forgot to put the buns out. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There are plenty of people who enjoy being married. Isn’t it proven to be better for men’s health ? I’m sure I read that somewhere.
They get a new mama to look after them "
Does that make them all mother fuckers? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
You may well have caught me at the wrong time for this...
My wife asked for a divorce recently after 20 years together. The love was there, wedding day great, etc. 2 kids, all that.
She said we'd grown apart and were too different and should go our separate ways.
Loads more too it, but I don't want to bore.
Regarding play, it was always vanilla, the main reason I joined fab is to explore alternatives. However, because I loved her, it was enough.
Now I'm struggling to get the mortgage to buy her out of the house.
If you want to be with her and like the idea, do it. If you're able to accept everything about her, do it. If you love her unconditionally, do it. Treat it as the ultimate romantic commitment. Things may not last forever, but live it in the moment.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"A lot of the time I hate being single and feel like happy ever after won't happen for me.
However I overhead this couple out for dinner at the weekend. He says " I'm going to the tip tomorrow, would you like to come with me."
He looked so pleased and I could practically hear her eyes roll...
Seriously, if that's marriage you can keep it !"
I disagree - marriage is about being so happy to be with someone, you are happy to be with them whatever they are doing, the mundane things, the difficult things, and the fun things.
Bring it on, that's human life and compassion. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I saw one I liked on Facebook this morning:
'Marriage: an endless sleepover with your favourite wierdo!'.
Marriage should be fun - the only thing I really miss about my ex is the play, we used to play all the time. And the hugs - he was an epic hugger.
Aww I love that! Every night I'm so happy I get to sleep beside my favourite weirdo "
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There are plenty of people who enjoy being married. Isn’t it proven to be better for men’s health ? I’m sure I read that somewhere.
They get a new mama to look after them
Does that make them all mother fuckers?"
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I absolutely love being married! I was very happy with my husband even before we were married, but being married took it to a new level for me. Maybe it's because I'm African and we have different traditions so being married is definitely different to being partners.
And I know most people will disagree with this, but I love being his and him mine. It has added a whole new dimension to our already awesome relationship. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"A lot of the time I hate being single and feel like happy ever after won't happen for me.
However I overhead this couple out for dinner at the weekend. He says " I'm going to the tip tomorrow, would you like to come with me."
He looked so pleased and I could practically hear her eyes roll...
Seriously, if that's marriage you can keep it !"
That's a snapshot of one time in one marriage. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is"
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights. "
yes that would be my only reason. I wish my dad and his partner had done it. But as we dont live together the financial side of things isnt an issue |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Whilst it shows you like someone more, is it more a practicality? I heard that when some divorce it could be a nightmare to get the house from the other half, whats your view, whats the pros and cons?
My view of marriage is it's being part of a team, someone's always got your back, as commiserator or cheerleader. Heading through life together with your best friend and partner. Sometimes it's shit, yep. But mostly it's lovely.
"
This is well said. I think too many have the wrong idea that it's always to be a rose bed and when they find its involves hard work on both parties they look elsewhere for their romantic effortless idea of marriage. We need those hard difficult times to give good foundation but also to make those great time shine. Without the hard times we don't fully appreciate and covet those good.
Many separate for different reasons and each is different it's hard to generalise but when you see a good happy one it's rarely equalled imo. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights. "
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I absolutely love being married! I was very happy with my husband even before we were married, but being married took it to a new level for me. Maybe it's because I'm African and we have different traditions so being married is definitely different to being partners.
And I know most people will disagree with this, but I love being his and him mine. It has added a whole new dimension to our already awesome relationship. "
That's lovely to hear where it appears the majority see it otherwise.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights.
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that."
it was bloody stressful for me and i got on with her as he never even left a will |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights.
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that.it was bloody stressful for me and i got on with her as he never even left a will "
Yes. It can be upsetting for the beteaved partner when they can't make basic decisions too. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights.
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that.it was bloody stressful for me and i got on with her as he never even left a will
Yes. It can be upsetting for the beteaved partner when they can't make basic decisions too."
it was ridiculous. She couldnt even pick the death certificate up or register the death. I had to literally do everything. Luckily i did/do have a great relationship with her so we worked together. Even had to come down to me to switch his life support off |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights.
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that.it was bloody stressful for me and i got on with her as he never even left a will
Yes. It can be upsetting for the beteaved partner when they can't make basic decisions too.it was ridiculous. She couldnt even pick the death certificate up or register the death. I had to literally do everything. Luckily i did/do have a great relationship with her so we worked together. Even had to come down to me to switch his life support off"
Mr N had a similar experience but with a post mortem. There should be some sort of thing you could set up to nominate a next of kin of your choosing. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"A lot of the time I hate being single and feel like happy ever after won't happen for me.
However I overhead this couple out for dinner at the weekend. He says " I'm going to the tip tomorrow, would you like to come with me."
He looked so pleased and I could practically hear her eyes roll...
Seriously, if that's marriage you can keep it !"
Clearly you have never had the pleasure of the tip shop! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *sfleurWoman
over a year ago
wednesfield |
I enjoyed marriage had great sex & he was my best mate - sadly he passed away 8 years ago - miss the intimacy & laughs still & the history together - Ive had some fun & a toyboy but if I was younger would still enjoy being with one guy - never knock marriage as long as it suits you  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights.
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that.it was bloody stressful for me and i got on with her as he never even left a will
Yes. It can be upsetting for the beteaved partner when they can't make basic decisions too.it was ridiculous. She couldnt even pick the death certificate up or register the death. I had to literally do everything. Luckily i did/do have a great relationship with her so we worked together. Even had to come down to me to switch his life support off
Mr N had a similar experience but with a post mortem. There should be some sort of thing you could set up to nominate a next of kin of your choosing."
it's called marriage/civil partnership
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights.
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that.it was bloody stressful for me and i got on with her as he never even left a will
Yes. It can be upsetting for the beteaved partner when they can't make basic decisions too.it was ridiculous. She couldnt even pick the death certificate up or register the death. I had to literally do everything. Luckily i did/do have a great relationship with her so we worked together. Even had to come down to me to switch his life support off
Mr N had a similar experience but with a post mortem. There should be some sort of thing you could set up to nominate a next of kin of your choosing.
it's called marriage/civil partnership
"
Aside from that. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *OCKDUDE1Man
over a year ago
TROWBRIDGE/BRISTOL |
"Whilst it shows you like someone more, is it more a practicality? I heard that when some divorce it could be a nightmare to get the house from the other half, whats your view, whats the pros and cons?
My view of marriage is it's being part of a team, someone's always got your back, as commiserator or cheerleader. Heading through life together with your best friend and partner. Sometimes it's shit, yep. But mostly it's lovely.
"
I totally agree with all this massively but I think the OP was asking if the actual getting married part was worth it...what you've described is definitely how everyone would want their partnership to be. I think the OP wanted to know if the complications, possible expenses etc that could come with marriage, especially if it doesn't work out...then you have extra complications and expenses, added stresses with divorce! I am a believer in marriage by the way but I understand people questioning it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights.
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that.it was bloody stressful for me and i got on with her as he never even left a will
Yes. It can be upsetting for the beteaved partner when they can't make basic decisions too.it was ridiculous. She couldnt even pick the death certificate up or register the death. I had to literally do everything. Luckily i did/do have a great relationship with her so we worked together. Even had to come down to me to switch his life support off
Mr N had a similar experience but with a post mortem. There should be some sort of thing you could set up to nominate a next of kin of your choosing.
it's called marriage/civil partnership
Aside from that."
why?
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights.
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that.it was bloody stressful for me and i got on with her as he never even left a will
Yes. It can be upsetting for the beteaved partner when they can't make basic decisions too.it was ridiculous. She couldnt even pick the death certificate up or register the death. I had to literally do everything. Luckily i did/do have a great relationship with her so we worked together. Even had to come down to me to switch his life support off
Mr N had a similar experience but with a post mortem. There should be some sort of thing you could set up to nominate a next of kin of your choosing."
I hate all the automatic rights that blood relatives have. Some people have families they would never choose as friends.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights.
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that.it was bloody stressful for me and i got on with her as he never even left a will
Yes. It can be upsetting for the beteaved partner when they can't make basic decisions too.it was ridiculous. She couldnt even pick the death certificate up or register the death. I had to literally do everything. Luckily i did/do have a great relationship with her so we worked together. Even had to come down to me to switch his life support off
Mr N had a similar experience but with a post mortem. There should be some sort of thing you could set up to nominate a next of kin of your choosing.
I hate all the automatic rights that blood relatives have. Some people have families they would never choose as friends. "
which automatic rights? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights.
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that.it was bloody stressful for me and i got on with her as he never even left a will
Yes. It can be upsetting for the beteaved partner when they can't make basic decisions too.it was ridiculous. She couldnt even pick the death certificate up or register the death. I had to literally do everything. Luckily i did/do have a great relationship with her so we worked together. Even had to come down to me to switch his life support off
Mr N had a similar experience but with a post mortem. There should be some sort of thing you could set up to nominate a next of kin of your choosing.
I hate all the automatic rights that blood relatives have. Some people have families they would never choose as friends. "
I'm probably talking shite, apologies.
I just found this:
"Next of kin legal rights. The term usually means your nearest blood relative. In the case of a married couple or a civil partnership it usually means their husband or wife.
Next of kin is a title that can be given, by you, to anyone from your partner to blood relatives and even friends.
It is also possible to name more than one person as your next of kin. This is a title that is primarily used in order for emergency services to know who to keep informed about an individual’s condition and treatment."
I never knew that. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights.
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that.it was bloody stressful for me and i got on with her as he never even left a will
Yes. It can be upsetting for the beteaved partner when they can't make basic decisions too.it was ridiculous. She couldnt even pick the death certificate up or register the death. I had to literally do everything. Luckily i did/do have a great relationship with her so we worked together. Even had to come down to me to switch his life support off
Mr N had a similar experience but with a post mortem. There should be some sort of thing you could set up to nominate a next of kin of your choosing.
I hate all the automatic rights that blood relatives have. Some people have families they would never choose as friends.
which automatic rights?"
when my dad died he left no will so everything automatically came to me i could of kept everything and not shared it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights.
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that.it was bloody stressful for me and i got on with her as he never even left a will
Yes. It can be upsetting for the beteaved partner when they can't make basic decisions too.it was ridiculous. She couldnt even pick the death certificate up or register the death. I had to literally do everything. Luckily i did/do have a great relationship with her so we worked together. Even had to come down to me to switch his life support off
Mr N had a similar experience but with a post mortem. There should be some sort of thing you could set up to nominate a next of kin of your choosing.
it's called marriage/civil partnership
Aside from that.
why?
"
So that people who choose not to get married or enter into a civil partnership can nominate their partner as their next of kin. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights.
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that.it was bloody stressful for me and i got on with her as he never even left a will
Yes. It can be upsetting for the beteaved partner when they can't make basic decisions too.it was ridiculous. She couldnt even pick the death certificate up or register the death. I had to literally do everything. Luckily i did/do have a great relationship with her so we worked together. Even had to come down to me to switch his life support off
Mr N had a similar experience but with a post mortem. There should be some sort of thing you could set up to nominate a next of kin of your choosing.
I hate all the automatic rights that blood relatives have. Some people have families they would never choose as friends.
I'm probably talking shite, apologies.
I just found this:
"Next of kin legal rights. The term usually means your nearest blood relative. In the case of a married couple or a civil partnership it usually means their husband or wife.
Next of kin is a title that can be given, by you, to anyone from your partner to blood relatives and even friends.
It is also possible to name more than one person as your next of kin. This is a title that is primarily used in order for emergency services to know who to keep informed about an individual’s condition and treatment."
I never knew that. "
It's fairly difficult to do that after you're dead |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights.
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that.it was bloody stressful for me and i got on with her as he never even left a will
Yes. It can be upsetting for the beteaved partner when they can't make basic decisions too.it was ridiculous. She couldnt even pick the death certificate up or register the death. I had to literally do everything. Luckily i did/do have a great relationship with her so we worked together. Even had to come down to me to switch his life support off
Mr N had a similar experience but with a post mortem. There should be some sort of thing you could set up to nominate a next of kin of your choosing.
it's called marriage/civil partnership
Aside from that.
why?
So that people who choose not to get married or enter into a civil partnership can nominate their partner as their next of kin."
they already can ... but people choose not to use the mechanisms provided and that cause problems for those around them |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"i've had friends who were couples where one half of the couple have tragically passed away. the remaining unmarried partner lost everything as the next of kin were beneficiaries to the deceased's estate"
.
Why would they expect to inherit the partners worldly possessions?.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"i've had friends who were couples where one half of the couple have tragically passed away. the remaining unmarried partner lost everything as the next of kin were beneficiaries to the deceased's estate.
Why would they expect to inherit the partners worldly possessions?.
"
if you where sharing a home with someone you would expect to be able to still live in it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights.
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that.it was bloody stressful for me and i got on with her as he never even left a will
Yes. It can be upsetting for the beteaved partner when they can't make basic decisions too.it was ridiculous. She couldnt even pick the death certificate up or register the death. I had to literally do everything. Luckily i did/do have a great relationship with her so we worked together. Even had to come down to me to switch his life support off
Mr N had a similar experience but with a post mortem. There should be some sort of thing you could set up to nominate a next of kin of your choosing.
it's called marriage/civil partnership
Aside from that.
why?
So that people who choose not to get married or enter into a civil partnership can nominate their partner as their next of kin.
they already can ... but people choose not to use the mechanisms provided and that cause problems for those around them"
It's pretty clear that quite a few people in this thread, me included, didn't know that. You can't choose something you don't know about. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"For me i couldnt see any benefit to getting married. My relationship is perfect how it is
My friends have been together 30 years. They are seriously thinking about getting married just due to legal reasons if (when) one of them dies. Sharing ownership of the house and things like that. Also next of kin rights.
It can be very distressing when a partner if the next of kin is a child who might not have had a great relationship with their parent's new partner. If for no other reason its worth getting the piece of paper to avoid that.it was bloody stressful for me and i got on with her as he never even left a will
Yes. It can be upsetting for the beteaved partner when they can't make basic decisions too.it was ridiculous. She couldnt even pick the death certificate up or register the death. I had to literally do everything. Luckily i did/do have a great relationship with her so we worked together. Even had to come down to me to switch his life support off
Mr N had a similar experience but with a post mortem. There should be some sort of thing you could set up to nominate a next of kin of your choosing.
it's called marriage/civil partnership
Aside from that.
why?
So that people who choose not to get married or enter into a civil partnership can nominate their partner as their next of kin.
they already can ... but people choose not to use the mechanisms provided and that cause problems for those around them
It's pretty clear that quite a few people in this thread, me included, didn't know that. You can't choose something you don't know about."
hopefully this thread will prompt some folks to investigate what the ramifications are when they don't consider what their loved ones rights are when they pass away then |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Oho def a post that is going to bring the embittered and the cynical to the fore.
We've managed decades of marriage and fought our way, side by side through life's storms, disasters (including losing a home and business to greedy bankers in the late 80s banking scandals that left us literally with almost nothing), overcome grief and regained happiness. Together, side by side, often hard work and graft but we've emerged stronger, together until death.
Nothing worthwhile in life is easy. Nothing worth holding onto falls into your lap without effort except in fairy land.
As for complications re wills etc. Keep it simple. We have a "living will" registered with our solicitor and known to the family.
When one of us dies the other inherits everything. When they die the children inherit equal shares of the remaining estate (as in monetary value not place with trees and lawns). |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"i've had friends who were couples where one half of the couple have tragically passed away. the remaining unmarried partner lost everything as the next of kin were beneficiaries to the deceased's estate.
Why would they expect to inherit the partners worldly possessions?.
if you where sharing a home with someone you would expect to be able to still live in it"
.
You can, but you might have to buy your partners share of it?. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"i've had friends who were couples where one half of the couple have tragically passed away. the remaining unmarried partner lost everything as the next of kin were beneficiaries to the deceased's estate.
Why would they expect to inherit the partners worldly possessions?.
if you where sharing a home with someone you would expect to be able to still live in it.
You can, but you might have to buy your partners share of it?."
when my dad died i could of whipped everything from under his partners feet
House, pensions and money. I could of literally left her with nothing. Yes she could of contested |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"A lot of the time I hate being single and feel like happy ever after won't happen for me.
However I overhead this couple out for dinner at the weekend. He says " I'm going to the tip tomorrow, would you like to come with me."
He looked so pleased and I could practically hear her eyes roll...
Seriously, if that's marriage you can keep it !
That's a snapshot of one time in one marriage."
Heh heh...don't knock it. Marriage is about sharing the mundane as well as the fabulous.
My other half often accompanies me to the tip. Though sometimes I suspect ulterior motives as we seem to come back with inordinate amounts of their very good line in low priced compost.
I'm pretty sure she's also checking that I do indeed dump the stuff I've finally separated out as definite junk from my "will come in handy one day" collection of goodies.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"i've had friends who were couples where one half of the couple have tragically passed away. the remaining unmarried partner lost everything as the next of kin were beneficiaries to the deceased's estate.
Why would they expect to inherit the partners worldly possessions?.
if you where sharing a home with someone you would expect to be able to still live in it.
You can, but you might have to buy your partners share of it?."
as i understand it, the beneficiaries of the will are obliged to allow the common law partner to carry on living in the property until thier death... the monetary side of things is clear ... in the absence of a will the next of kin/ blood relations inherit |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"i've had friends who were couples where one half of the couple have tragically passed away. the remaining unmarried partner lost everything as the next of kin were beneficiaries to the deceased's estate.
Why would they expect to inherit the partners worldly possessions?.
"
i didn't say they would ... i just posted in relation to the lack of forsight displayed by some folks |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"i've had friends who were couples where one half of the couple have tragically passed away. the remaining unmarried partner lost everything as the next of kin were beneficiaries to the deceased's estate.
Why would they expect to inherit the partners worldly possessions?.
if you where sharing a home with someone you would expect to be able to still live in it.
You can, but you might have to buy your partners share of it?.
as i understand it, the beneficiaries of the will are obliged to allow the common law partner to carry on living in the property until thier death... the monetary side of things is clear ... in the absence of a will the next of kin/ blood relations inherit "
they cant sell the house or remorgage it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"i've had friends who were couples where one half of the couple have tragically passed away. the remaining unmarried partner lost everything as the next of kin were beneficiaries to the deceased's estate.
Why would they expect to inherit the partners worldly possessions?.
i didn't say they would ... i just posted in relation to the lack of forsight displayed by some folks"
.
My aunty left her entire estate to the local church despite still being married with children.
My uncle and my cousins spent alot of time and money trying to overturn her will. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"i've had friends who were couples where one half of the couple have tragically passed away. the remaining unmarried partner lost everything as the next of kin were beneficiaries to the deceased's estate.
Why would they expect to inherit the partners worldly possessions?.
i didn't say they would ... i just posted in relation to the lack of forsight displayed by some folks.
My aunty left her entire estate to the local church despite still being married with children.
My uncle and my cousins spent alot of time and money trying to overturn her will."
and? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"i've had friends who were couples where one half of the couple have tragically passed away. the remaining unmarried partner lost everything as the next of kin were beneficiaries to the deceased's estate.
Why would they expect to inherit the partners worldly possessions?.
i didn't say they would ... i just posted in relation to the lack of forsight displayed by some folks.
My aunty left her entire estate to the local church despite still being married with children.
My uncle and my cousins spent alot of time and money trying to overturn her will.
and?"
.
You should never assume that you'll inherit anything regardless? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Solicitors are the ones that make marriage break up hard work
I guess they do the same when your buying your house ...no reason for it to take months .
Anyway .I think Solicitors fuel each parties fire to nd fro of total in necessary and irrelevant toddle.
The judge isn't really interested in 90% of it ..
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"i've had friends who were couples where one half of the couple have tragically passed away. the remaining unmarried partner lost everything as the next of kin were beneficiaries to the deceased's estate.
Why would they expect to inherit the partners worldly possessions?.
i didn't say they would ... i just posted in relation to the lack of forsight displayed by some folks.
My aunty left her entire estate to the local church despite still being married with children.
My uncle and my cousins spent alot of time and money trying to overturn her will.
and?.
You should never assume that you'll inherit anything regardless?"
that's a fact ... but not sure what that has to do with the topic of the thread
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"i've had friends who were couples where one half of the couple have tragically passed away. the remaining unmarried partner lost everything as the next of kin were beneficiaries to the deceased's estate.
Why would they expect to inherit the partners worldly possessions?.
i didn't say they would ... i just posted in relation to the lack of forsight displayed by some folks.
My aunty left her entire estate to the local church despite still being married with children.
My uncle and my cousins spent alot of time and money trying to overturn her will.
and?.
You should never assume that you'll inherit anything regardless?
that's a fact ... but not sure what that has to do with the topic of the thread
"
.
I thought we were talking about the differences in inheriting between married and unmarried?.
I was saying that being married doesn't guarantee inheriting anything either! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I'm on my second divorce....
I'm a filthy romantic, thought I could make sacrifices to make things work and thought love was enough. It isn't...
I have terrible taste in men,and now would never trust myself to make that commitment again.
Plus the number of married men (without her knowledge) on here makes me even more cynical.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"i've had friends who were couples where one half of the couple have tragically passed away. the remaining unmarried partner lost everything as the next of kin were beneficiaries to the deceased's estate.
Why would they expect to inherit the partners worldly possessions?.
i didn't say they would ... i just posted in relation to the lack of forsight displayed by some folks.
My aunty left her entire estate to the local church despite still being married with children.
My uncle and my cousins spent alot of time and money trying to overturn her will.
and?.
You should never assume that you'll inherit anything regardless?
that's a fact ... but not sure what that has to do with the topic of the thread
.
I thought we were talking about the differences in inheriting between married and unmarried?.
I was saying that being married doesn't guarantee inheriting anything either!"
still don't see what your getting at as regards my first post really |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I love being married.
When I wake in the night, I’m not alone. I can snuggle up and feel safe. I adore being held as I sleep too.
I come home to my best friend. We share our triumphs. Make the shite days better.
Back each other up. Make each other laugh. Cry sometimes.
Always there, happy to hear from me, if I phone during the day.
When we make love..... well that’s between us |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Our 30th wedding anniversary today...
We still wind each other up, make each other laugh,cry and most importantly tea! ( cake is optional..)
But seriously we simply still care "
Congratulations x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I thought I had a happy marriage until one day she said it was over.said she still loved me but not in the way a wife should I think sex had a lot to do with it I’m highly sexed and she went off it after the birth of our daughter and that put a big strain on the marriage |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I don’t think marriage is the be all and end all..
I was married for 13 years and enjoyed about 6 months of it.. I don’t think it’s as important to people as it was. I’m happy to be with someone that I love and that I know loves me and be secure in that without feeling the need to confirm it.. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
