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How many of you.....
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Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar...  hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it...   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It really depends on my confidence levels at any given time.
If I'm feeling good, I'll make the approach. If not, I won't.
At the moment, I'm not really sending messages. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it... "
I think I do both, I know striking up a message convo has gone very well but as also a softly softly approach in the forums.
I’ve certainly enjoyed sending messages to a very fanciable someone in this thread.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It depends, we have messaged direct, flirted on the forums but we also have a few we haven’t messaged and we are just hopeful they will message us hahaha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m usually not shy about making my intentions or attraction known, I rarely send a ‘cold’ message though.
I usually comment on a post they’ve made or occasionally their status so as to get the conversation started. I’ve been lucky enough to have received messages from ladies that I’ve been interested in, in the past too!
I certainly don’t believe in sitting around and watching or waiting. |
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"It depends, we have messaged direct, flirted on the forums but we also have a few we haven’t messaged and we are just hopeful they will message us hahaha "
But that's like sitting in a restaurant hoping the waiter will bring you your favourite food  |
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I go through phases where I will message people or I don’t... the other day I got a “your not my type..” which is a bit naff  But not everyone can like you...
But I always think... what if.....and that’s what drives me...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it... "
I rarely initiate a message with a woman and one of the most recent incidences where I did omg what a reply ha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Previously sent a direct message, though given the volume women receive on here need to start being on forums more.
If the message or post gets picked up, great, if not, onwards. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Message people?
Pfft
We can't all just sit back and watch them roll in.. "
Sadly for guys you don't get many messages roll in like me. Fifty or sixty a day |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I also love it when someone I fancy makes contact with me. It happened yesterday.
It made me very happy. "
Really pleased for you x
Meeting someone I used to chat with years ago tomorrow |
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it... I rarely initiate a message with a woman and one of the most recent incidences where I did omg what a reply ha "
Good or bad? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I go through phases where I will message people or I don’t... the other day I got a “your not my type..” which is a bit naff But not everyone can like you...
But I always think... what if.....and that’s what drives me... "
Ooh, poor you, you actually got a response but it was "your not my type"(sic) you should report them!  |
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"I go through phases where I will message people or I don’t... the other day I got a “your not my type..” which is a bit naff But not everyone can like you...
But I always think... what if.....and that’s what drives me...
Ooh, poor you, you actually got a response but it was "your not my type"(sic) you should report them! "
??? Hahaha I wasn’t after a poor me!! I don’t have a problem if I’m not someone’s type!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I go through phases where I will message people or I don’t... the other day I got a “your not my type..” which is a bit naff But not everyone can like you...
But I always think... what if.....and that’s what drives me...
Ooh, poor you, you actually got a response but it was "your not my type"(sic) you should report them!
??? Hahaha I wasn’t after a poor me!! I don’t have a problem if I’m not someone’s type! "
I do, every woman must fancy me  |
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"I go through phases where I will message people or I don’t... the other day I got a “your not my type..” which is a bit naff But not everyone can like you...
But I always think... what if.....and that’s what drives me...
Ooh, poor you, you actually got a response but it was "your not my type"(sic) you should report them!
??? Hahaha I wasn’t after a poor me!! I don’t have a problem if I’m not someone’s type!
I do, every woman must fancy me "
 |
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There are a few here that we have chatted that we'd love to meet up with. We will be visiting a club or two in the not so distant future with the hopes to meet them there.
Our Chats have been a lot of fun and there is a connection going on. They didn't particularly set out that way but these people are fabulous and to us and worthy of the expense, time and effort to visit. We've no reason to doubt them in any way whatsoever |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It depends, we have messaged direct, flirted on the forums but we also have a few we haven’t messaged and we are just hopeful they will message us hahaha
But that's like sitting in a restaurant hoping the waiter will bring you your favourite food "
Very true! But maybe if I keep going to that restaurant and hinting towards it one day he might, just might, bring me that dish!
Hehehe |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I very rarely ever send anyone a first message. I just sit in the cave quietly whittling and platting my fur thinking maybe someone may one day find me here.
But what happens then.... |
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"So snowwhite how many unread emails so far today ?
You are sooo perwittyxx"
Hahaha actually Im trying to keep it in order at the minute so it’s not as bad as it could be... a lot of the time though if I’m reading the forums I don’t always check my messages! |
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"
I very rarely ever send anyone a first message. I just sit in the cave quietly whittling and platting my fur thinking maybe someone may one day find me here.
But what happens then...."
Well it’s time you started sending first messages Mr Hine... stop hiding!! Xxx |
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By *uckymooMan
over a year ago
Mid-Cheshire |
"So snowwhite how many unread emails so far today ?
You are sooo perwittyxx
Hahaha actually Im trying to keep it in order at the minute so it’s not as bad as it could be... a lot of the time though if I’m reading the forums I don’t always check my messages! "
Well just check mine then |
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it... "
for what it's worth, assertiveness in a women ouze's sex appeal |
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"So snowwhite how many unread emails so far today ?
You are sooo perwittyxx
Hahaha actually Im trying to keep it in order at the minute so it’s not as bad as it could be... a lot of the time though if I’m reading the forums I don’t always check my messages!
Well just check mine then "
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it... for what it's worth, assertiveness in a women ouze's sex appeal"
I just think life is too short... so it’s worth the risk... most of the time!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s sooooo hard for a decent guy to shine through over messages. Because of all the dick heads spoiling it with no imagination is messages! Tbh I always think I got no chance with who I fancy so I tend to leave it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Happy to get straight in there and message first if someone piques my interest "
I love a woman from Belfast I came over and stayed at stormont hotel recently |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Happy to get straight in there and message first if someone piques my interest I love a woman from Belfast I came over and stayed at stormont hotel recently "
Grew up a stone's throw from there. Not that I condone stone throwing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Happy to get straight in there and message first if someone piques my interest I love a woman from Belfast I came over and stayed at stormont hotel recently
Grew up a stone's throw from there. Not that I condone stone throwing. "
Bloody hell i need a forum on how to pique interest lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Happy to get straight in there and message first if someone piques my interest I love a woman from Belfast I came over and stayed at stormont hotel recently
Grew up a stone's throw from there. Not that I condone stone throwing. "
Ha it was lovely also stayed at Ramadan encore bit more expensive and not as nice I thought |
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"It’s sooooo hard for a decent guy to shine through over messages. Because of all the dick heads spoiling it with no imagination is messages! Tbh I always think I got no chance with who I fancy so I tend to leave it "
I get that from a male perspective and yes I do get loads of messages (that is not me bragging at all) so I probably do miss some great messages... also if I’m on the forums I don’t always keep checking and thats when I probably miss out... anyway my point is you shouldn’t give up!! |
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it... "
I don't use the forums with intention of meeting anyone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" I get that from a male perspective and yes I do get loads of messages (that is not me bragging at all) so I probably do miss some great messages... also if I’m on the forums I don’t always keep checking and thats when I probably miss out... anyway my point is you shouldn’t give up!! "
Yeah I bet you get loads of hey how are you’s? And no imagination in the massages. I’m pretty new to the forum side of it and loving it so far although I struggle to keep up sometimes lol. But it’s nice to get to see ppls personalities too! I will try and not give up thank you x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Forums are fascinating and I imagine you could get an interesting and productive conversation going but it’s still better I think to send a well thought out individual message to the person who takes your fancy and to not be disheartened if you don’t get a reply. I’ve always enjoyed a bit of masochism though |
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" I get that from a male perspective and yes I do get loads of messages (that is not me bragging at all) so I probably do miss some great messages... also if I’m on the forums I don’t always keep checking and thats when I probably miss out... anyway my point is you shouldn’t give up!!
Yeah I bet you get loads of hey how are you’s? And no imagination in the massages. I’m pretty new to the forum side of it and loving it so far although I struggle to keep up sometimes lol. But it’s nice to get to see ppls personalities too! I will try and not give up thank you x"
Just enjoy the forums for what they are and don’t get drawn into stuff... fab can be great but not so great if you get bogged down by it!! But there’s some lovely sexy people on here!! Have fun!!! |
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In the past I have sent mail, it was usually forum driven and if it became more than a chat then good, if it was for a chat only then that was good too, you can’t be everyone’s cup of tea all the time |
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"In the past I have sent mail, it was usually forum driven and if it became more than a chat then good, if it was for a chat only then that was good too, you can’t be everyone’s cup of tea all the time "
^^^^^ totally agree! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it... "
Me too. Never been one to hold back.
Just hit send then cringe hoping it's not deleted or worse still... read then deleted |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I very rarely ever send anyone a first message. I just sit in the cave quietly whittling and platting my fur thinking maybe someone may one day find me here.
But what happens then....
Well it’s time you started sending first messages Mr Hine... stop hiding!! Xxx"
Write stuff 
String words together
Well beyond a simple cave man |
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it...
Me too. Never been one to hold back.
Just hit send then cringe hoping it's not deleted or worse still... read then deleted "
Hahaha yeah it can be a bit cringing... but it’s part of fablife isn’t it!! x |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
I message - admittedly not always a particularly great first message (Hey tends to be used quite a lot) but an attempt at initiation still counts regardless of the bumbling nature of it.
If they use the forum or have, it's a lot easier. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In the past I have sent mail, it was usually forum driven and if it became more than a chat then good, if it was for a chat only then that was good too, you can’t be everyone’s cup of tea all the time "
I consider myself a bit of an acquired taste, therefore this gets a double thumbs up from me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it... "
I believe you’ve just got to go for it! Life’s too short! Better to get rejected than to never know I think |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it...
Me too. Never been one to hold back.
Just hit send then cringe hoping it's not deleted or worse still... read then deleted
Hahaha yeah it can be a bit cringing... but it’s part of fablife isn’t it!! x"
Yep |
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it...
I do both if there’s someone I fancy I’ll slide in their in box if they’re on the forums I’ll message regarding the forum post as an ice breaker  "
^^^ this! Me too! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm rubbish at messaging but I do flirt in The Forums. I usually just respond to a message tbh. "
I love a good flirt but by the time o respond someone’s beat me to a funny flirt comment lmao |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm rubbish at messaging but I do flirt in The Forums. I usually just respond to a message tbh.
I love a good flirt but by the time o respond someone’s beat me to a funny flirt comment lmao "
I can definitely relate to this!! |
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There's soo many people on the forum with "hilarious" made up area names that leave you with no clue as to where abouts in the country they may be. Leaves me thinking no point messaging them, they're probably miles away. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Happy to get straight in there and message first if someone piques my interest I love a woman from Belfast I came over and stayed at stormont hotel recently
Grew up a stone's throw from there. Not that I condone stone throwing. Ha it was lovely also stayed at Ramadan encore bit more expensive and not as nice I thought "
ramada omg close enough though I suppose |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it...
Me too. Never been one to hold back.
Just hit send then cringe hoping it's not deleted or worse still... read then deleted "
So true |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I message people, always politely, but only people who's profiles appeal. Sometimes get a reply, mostly the old "not what we are looking for' line, sometimes they are read and left, and sometimes deleted straight away.
I've also messaged one or two via the forums. Better results |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've found sending decent pics and a well thought out first message usually works... but women are prone to 101 messages sometimes it just gets lost in their inbox lol
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it... "
Hell yes, just go for it! I have no problem sending the first message |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it... "
I go for it when filters allow it... nothing ventured nothing gained |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
I very rarely send "cold" messages - I find them a little awkward and clinical to be honest.
So most of my interaction is off the back of forum posts, sometimes it may only be a couple of messages and things get stilted so that's as far as it goes - other times it will just flow naturally and evolve into an ongoing conversation.
Either way if it was someone I've hotlisted etc and would be interested in potentially meeting I have no problem telling them.......once I've put my big boy pants on of course |
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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago
south east |
"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it... "
If I was to wait on message I'd never get a meet ..in general I find women less likely to make first contact ..don't get me wrong it has happened but VERY RARELY |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it... "
If i really like the look of someone i will message them...
If i do it via the forums its just banter |
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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago
Chippenham Malmesbury area |
"Have done, and it's led to meets after so was well worth taking the risk with. "
I do it all the time, very rarely get a response though; but, when I do it's always been a great meet and I've made some wonderful friends. |
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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago
mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds |
I proactively look for ladies who I'm attracted to and interested in.. the forums are an area I frequent and if I see someone I like I'll gladly initiate contact..
I'm surprised others are reticent in coming forward.. I don't get it.. I really don't .. no matter how detailed the profile it might not give the person viewing it the right information, however like me if they use the tools available they know better than anyone or any words can inform who ticks their boxes... in my eyes it being proactive at least doubles your chances.
Fortune favours the brave. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I really fancy a few but i do not send message because they only get deleted in the end.
How would you know if you never send? "
because i have send and got nothing in return |
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
I rarely message people from the forum with a view to meeting, they're just simply too far away. I'm more than happy to contact people I like the look of from my local updates or my saved searches
You can't rely on guys to initiate contact around here so you may as well do it yourself!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it... "
I wink rather than message
If they respond great, if they don't, nothing lost |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it...
I wink rather than message
If they respond great, if they don't, nothing lost "
Where was mine lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I really fancy a few but i do not send message because they only get deleted in the end.
How would you know if you never send? because i have send and got nothing in return"
Perseverance my friend, perseverance.... unless of course you’re just going to give up and moan about your lack of success. If you don’t try you won’t succeed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do have a gander in the forums. Especially as we have blocked single men so I can pick whom I message. I grab the bull by the horns and message if I really like the look of them tho. Do love some banter and a flirt on the forums tho. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Running out of steam now but have been messaging pretty much anyone within a reasonable radius who isn't auto blocking me. Apart from those whose profile/pics appear to be sub-Jeremy Kyle standard.
It's quite time consuming to read the profiles a couple of times and draft something personalised, so in a way I'm quite glad that feasible 'targets' are now limited. Just sent the one message yesterday.
If I message anyone on the forums, it's usually just for fun as the distances aren't viable for one thing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We simply email people directly. Perhaps we exchange fabs and winks first or maybe we just introduce ourselves. Not everybody will want us and so if people don’t answer, no problem. |
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Experience tells me sending an introductory first message is a waste of time.
Other than conversation, no woman has ever sent me an opening message.
I use the forums for a chuckle and a club to meet.
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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago
Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro |
"Yes I have and I would. Sometimes its linked to a thread or maybe an appreciation of a great picture .
Bit of an echo there lol"
No not at all. I just like telling others something looks nice or giving a compliment. Not necessary linked to me being attracted to someone. I can appreciate this in both male and female. I always think whats the worse that can happen. |
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"We will flirt in the forums, and message if the flirt back.
There's one lady I've seen recent in the forums, But the distance makes it irrelevant.
Adam "
How do you know? Some people are happy to travel? Or would she be worth traveling too? |
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By *uckymooMan
over a year ago
Mid-Cheshire |
"We will flirt in the forums, and message if the flirt back.
There's one lady I've seen recent in the forums, But the distance makes it irrelevant.
Adam
How do you know? Some people are happy to travel? Or would she be worth traveling too? "
Oh i’d travel all the way to the other side of the country for a meet with the right lady :- |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it...
I wink rather than message
If they respond great, if they don't, nothing lost
Where was mine lol "
Ahem |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We will flirt in the forums, and message if the flirt back.
There's one lady I've seen recent in the forums, But the distance makes it irrelevant.
Adam
How do you know? Some people are happy to travel? Or would she be worth traveling too? "
Just when you had inspired me.. she has gone off site 
Adam.
What's the violin emoji again 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it...
I wink rather than message
If they respond great, if they don't, nothing lost
Where was mine lol
Ahem "
Something in your throat ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We will flirt in the forums, and message if the flirt back.
There's one lady I've seen recent in the forums, But the distance makes it irrelevant.
Adam
How do you know? Some people are happy to travel? Or would she be worth traveling too?
Just when you had inspired me.. she has gone off site
Adam.
What's the violin emoji again
"
You're welcome |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it...
I wink rather than message
If they respond great, if they don't, nothing lost
Where was mine lol
Ahem
Something in your throat ? "
Yes, sorry, bit of a cough  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it...
I wink rather than message
If they respond great, if they don't, nothing lost
Where was mine lol
Ahem
Something in your throat ?
Yes, sorry, bit of a cough "
Need a drink for it lol |
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"We will flirt in the forums, and message if the flirt back.
There's one lady I've seen recent in the forums, But the distance makes it irrelevant.
Adam
How do you know? Some people are happy to travel? Or would she be worth traveling too?
Just when you had inspired me.. she has gone off site
Adam.
What's the violin emoji again
"
well at least you was going to try!!! |
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"Yes I have and I would. Sometimes its linked to a thread or maybe an appreciation of a great picture .
Bit of an echo there lol
No not at all. I just like telling others something looks nice or giving a compliment. Not necessary linked to me being attracted to someone. I can appreciate this in both male and female. I always think whats the worse that can happen. "
I meant you’re post came up twice |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It depends, we have messaged direct, flirted on the forums but we also have a few we haven’t messaged and we are just hopeful they will message us hahaha
But that's like sitting in a restaurant hoping the waiter will bring you your favourite food "
I love that analogy. |
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By *NT88Couple
over a year ago
Beverley |
"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it... "
Just got for it. Risk it for a biscuit :p |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it... "
I've been winking at single men and you know what? None of those I winked at ever returned a wink or messaged
Guess our wink button is broken
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it...
I've been winking at single men and you know what? None of those I winked at ever returned a wink or messaged
Guess our wink button is broken
Mrs"
You should try it again, it can’t be broken |
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By *irthandgirthMan
over a year ago
Camberley occasionally doncaster |
I do a bit of both. I like the connection you get with a forum regular, and I am willing to approach from a thread. I am happy to travel for the right person and have always had a great time meeting off the forums. I'm also happy to just say hi to someone local I like the look of |
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it...
I've been winking at single men and you know what? None of those I winked at ever returned a wink or messaged
Guess our wink button is broken
Mrs"
To be honest I don’t check for winks... I always forget... so maybe it’s worth sending a message anyway... nothing might come of it... but then again who knows x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have never met someone I haven't nattered with in a chatroom first. Just seems a good way to see how people's sense of humour works, how they chat etc...
Have to say the chatrooms were more fun and far more creative before the cams came in.
Never met anyone just off a Forum although I can see how people click before messaging. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually send messages to the people you really fancy... do you use the forums to start that conversation... or do you just look from afar... hoping they will message you?
I believe in just going for it... "
me to if you don't ask you don't get |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I did actually message people first, mainly from the forums if I wanted to meet. Had a meeting break for a bit so now Im just a lustful watcher. But by heck some lovely people do keep finding me and are testing my resolve somewhat. |
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