FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Serious question about Fab...
Serious question about Fab...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Hi Fabbers
I am debating whether or not to renew my gold membership. In the time I've been on Fab, I've done all the "right" things, jumped through the hoops to put myself out there and meet some fab people. The reality has been somewhat sobering. I have met a few lovely people, but no actual meets yet. But by far my more common outcome is no replies, blocked (I have no idea why), or simply rude comments by ladies that feel all men are to be treated with distain. So should I continue to pay for a service that I feel is not doing anything for the single male? The competition for the few women on the site means either lowering my standards (they are high) or selling out and settling for someone who doesn't deserve my time or respect.
What does the collective feel is the right path?? |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
It is not a requirement.
Do you like to support the site? If yes, then renew.
Do you like the functionality you have with a paid supporters fee? If yes, then renew.
Otherwise, just let it lapse and use your profile without the extras. You can always support again in the future.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you feel you aren’t getting anything it if this site, I don’t see why you’d renew your membership.
I have high standards and I’d never lower them, because then I just wouldn’t enjoy it. If you’re not getting what you want from here, don’t bother renewing. |
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"Hi Fabbers
I am debating whether or not to renew my gold membership. In the time I've been on Fab, I've done all the "right" things, jumped through the hoops to put myself out there and meet some fab people. The reality has been somewhat sobering. I have met a few lovely people, but no actual meets yet. But by far my more common outcome is no replies, blocked (I have no idea why), or simply rude comments by ladies that feel all men are to be treated with distain. So should I continue to pay for a service that I feel is not doing anything for the single male? The competition for the few women on the site means either lowering my standards (they are high) or selling out and settling for someone who doesn't deserve my time or respect.
What does the collective feel is the right path??"
You have asked and answered your own question OP. |
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OP the site functions perfectly well for non site supporters, you just get a few extras if you choose to be a site supporter.
The only real impact in choosing not to renew will be some people use the filter to stop non supporters from messaging them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You haven’t asked for profile advice so we can’t give it.
If you aren’t getting what you want from the site then you should not waste your time.
There’s 1,000’s of guys on here so you need to ensure that your pics and profile stand out from the crowd as when you send a message to someone, they are the first things that they will look at before deciding whether to reply.
Have a positive approach and it could turn around for you  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You haven’t asked for profile advice so we can’t give it.
If you aren’t getting what you want from the site then you should not waste your time.
There’s 1,000’s of guys on here so you need to ensure that your pics and profile stand out from the crowd as when you send a message to someone, they are the first things that they will look at before deciding whether to reply.
Have a positive approach and it could turn around for you "
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Well, I have remained positive till recently. I enjoy the forums and can see the value of the site beyond just hook ups. But the last few ladies I've been chatting to just brought it home that in my area at least, the majority of the ladies are either choosing to filter me out or ignore me. It is just very frustrating... |
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By *lceeWoman
over a year ago
Leeds |
Yeah, we can’t give unsolicited advice on profiles sooooo....
...think positive! Your status seems to suggest that things are looking up for you, which is great!
Have you tried heading to your local swingers club and getting to know the lovely swinging folk around you in person? It’s a good way to get known and get some of those great veris talking about what a charmer you are, therefore making it easier to get meets. We girls don’t tend to go for unknown quantities! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What service are you paying for?
There's plenty of low standard women who don't deserve your time or respect. Why not give them a pity fuck? They need sex too. |
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By *lceeWoman
over a year ago
Leeds |
"Yeah, we can’t give unsolicited advice on profiles sooooo....
...think positive! Your status seems to suggest that things are looking up for you, which is great!
Have you tried heading to your local swingers club and getting to know the lovely swinging folk around you in person? It’s a good way to get known and get some of those great veris talking about what a charmer you are, therefore making it easier to get meets. We girls don’t tend to go for unknown quantities!"
Or a social, obviously!
If there are none in your area....why not organise one on the Scotland forum! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well, I have remained positive till recently. I enjoy the forums and can see the value of the site beyond just hook ups. But the last few ladies I've been chatting to just brought it home that in my area at least, the majority of the ladies are either choosing to filter me out or ignore me. It is just very frustrating..."
As others have said, positivity helps, and you could be putting off women if you aren’t positive.
Tweaking a profile is always a good idea to see if it helps. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Lol. Yes I've booked some holidays abroad, going alone so will be interesting. But I've just been honest with my profile and in my chats with various people. I know Fab doesn't provide a service that guarantees meets or anything like that, just here in the back of beyond (nearest club is about 400 miles) the pool of eligible candidates shall we say is a shallow pool indeed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lol. Yes I've booked some holidays abroad, going alone so will be interesting. But I've just been honest with my profile and in my chats with various people. I know Fab doesn't provide a service that guarantees meets or anything like that, just here in the back of beyond (nearest club is about 400 miles) the pool of eligible candidates shall we say is a shallow pool indeed "
Doesn't sound like it's worth renewing site supporter then. Some areas just have less people so it's less likely people will find someone to click with.
Social events might be a good idea even if you have to travel. 'Standards' online can be different to real life- people can look better than their pics show. Or the way they laugh/ smile/ interact may attract you when their grumpy message didn't. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Lol. Yes I've booked some holidays abroad, going alone so will be interesting. But I've just been honest with my profile and in my chats with various people. I know Fab doesn't provide a service that guarantees meets or anything like that, just here in the back of beyond (nearest club is about 400 miles) the pool of eligible candidates shall we say is a shallow pool indeed
Doesn't sound like it's worth renewing site supporter then. Some areas just have less people so it's less likely people will find someone to click with.
Social events might be a good idea even if you have to travel. 'Standards' online can be different to real life- people can look better than their pics show. Or the way they laugh/ smile/ interact may attract you when their grumpy message didn't. "
Agreed, I am much better in person |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi Fabbers
I am debating whether or not to renew my gold membership. In the time I've been on Fab, I've done all the "right" things, jumped through the hoops to put myself out there and meet some fab people. The reality has been somewhat sobering. I have met a few lovely people, but no actual meets yet. But by far my more common outcome is no replies, blocked (I have no idea why), or simply rude comments by ladies that feel all men are to be treated with distain. So should I continue to pay for a service that I feel is not doing anything for the single male? The competition for the few women on the site means either lowering my standards (they are high) or selling out and settling for someone who doesn't deserve my time or respect.
What does the collective feel is the right path??"
One public pic and 26 private screams friend collector. Just saying |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hi Fabbers
I am debating whether or not to renew my gold membership. In the time I've been on Fab, I've done all the "right" things, jumped through the hoops to put myself out there and meet some fab people. The reality has been somewhat sobering. I have met a few lovely people, but no actual meets yet. But by far my more common outcome is no replies, blocked (I have no idea why), or simply rude comments by ladies that feel all men are to be treated with distain. So should I continue to pay for a service that I feel is not doing anything for the single male? The competition for the few women on the site means either lowering my standards (they are high) or selling out and settling for someone who doesn't deserve my time or respect.
What does the collective feel is the right path??
One public pic and 26 private screams friend collector. Just saying"
It tells me he's a private person. Friend collectors usually just want to see other people's pics. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hi Fabbers
I am debating whether or not to renew my gold membership. In the time I've been on Fab, I've done all the "right" things, jumped through the hoops to put myself out there and meet some fab people. The reality has been somewhat sobering. I have met a few lovely people, but no actual meets yet. But by far my more common outcome is no replies, blocked (I have no idea why), or simply rude comments by ladies that feel all men are to be treated with distain. So should I continue to pay for a service that I feel is not doing anything for the single male? The competition for the few women on the site means either lowering my standards (they are high) or selling out and settling for someone who doesn't deserve my time or respect.
What does the collective feel is the right path??
One public pic and 26 private screams friend collector. Just saying
It tells me he's a private person. Friend collectors usually just want to see other people's pics."
That's my point you have to add him to see them, hence friend collector |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hi Fabbers
I am debating whether or not to renew my gold membership. In the time I've been on Fab, I've done all the "right" things, jumped through the hoops to put myself out there and meet some fab people. The reality has been somewhat sobering. I have met a few lovely people, but no actual meets yet. But by far my more common outcome is no replies, blocked (I have no idea why), or simply rude comments by ladies that feel all men are to be treated with distain. So should I continue to pay for a service that I feel is not doing anything for the single male? The competition for the few women on the site means either lowering my standards (they are high) or selling out and settling for someone who doesn't deserve my time or respect.
What does the collective feel is the right path??
One public pic and 26 private screams friend collector. Just saying
It tells me he's a private person. Friend collectors usually just want to see other people's pics.
That's my point you have to add him to see them, hence friend collector"
Ah ok got ya, sorry. Enticing them with friends pics. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you feel that disillusioned, hide profile and log off for a week. If you log straight back on then you're obviously fine and using the site! If you manage without then delete and move on!
I'm at one of those crossroads right now, no point moaning as FAB can change its fortunes within minutes of you debating going UNLOS! Ultimately very few people care...harsh I know.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" The competition for the few women on the site means either lowering my standards (they are high) or selling out and settling for someone who doesn't deserve my time or respect.
"
Surely everyone deserves your respect until they prove otherwise....? |
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People get differing experience of fab over time - partly based upon our efforts, our attractiveness to others as well as the pot-luck elements of whatever else is going on: local competition, new users who may want someone like ourselves more than the established users did etc.
People don't block for no reason btw - they block because they have decided that further communication between yourselves would not be effective use of yours, or their own time and energy.
It's worth being realistic and using the site to complement a wider swinging lifestyle, if that's what one is after. We can assume that there are matches for everybody but that for some people, in some areas, at some points in time, are going to find it easier or otherwise. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hi Fabbers
I am debating whether or not to renew my gold membership. In the time I've been on Fab, I've done all the "right" things, jumped through the hoops to put myself out there and meet some fab people. The reality has been somewhat sobering. I have met a few lovely people, but no actual meets yet. But by far my more common outcome is no replies, blocked (I have no idea why), or simply rude comments by ladies that feel all men are to be treated with distain. So should I continue to pay for a service that I feel is not doing anything for the single male? The competition for the few women on the site means either lowering my standards (they are high) or selling out and settling for someone who doesn't deserve my time or respect.
What does the collective feel is the right path??
One public pic and 26 private screams friend collector. Just saying"
Our pics are a similar ratio to his. We've got 4 friends. Just saying |
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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago
Paisley |
Paying for a membership makes no difference to getting meets. I only have it to make it easier to follow messages and make notes.
If you want to get profile advice ask for it. Do you go to socials? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Swinging is about meeting people first and foremost. If sex happens then its a bonus.
Not everyone you meet will be what you desire sexually, but if you only have the intention of interacting with people you want to have sex with then you are likely to be sorely disappointed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Lol. Yes I've booked some holidays abroad, going alone so will be interesting. But I've just been honest with my profile and in my chats with various people. I know Fab doesn't provide a service that guarantees meets or anything like that, just here in the back of beyond (nearest club is about 400 miles) the pool of eligible candidates shall we say is a shallow pool indeed "
Forget membership and get in google maps - neither Edinburgh or Glasgow is *that* far from Aberdeen
Personally though I think you should pay for membership (you can afford it reading your profile) that way it’s easier to keep track of your conversations- might help you figure out why you keep getting blocked |
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"Hi Fabbers
I am debating whether or not to renew my gold membership. In the time I've been on Fab, I've done all the "right" things, jumped through the hoops to put myself out there and meet some fab people. The reality has been somewhat sobering. I have met a few lovely people, but no actual meets yet. But by far my more common outcome is no replies, blocked (I have no idea why), or simply rude comments by ladies that feel all men are to be treated with distain. So should I continue to pay for a service that I feel is not doing anything for the single male? The competition for the few women on the site means either lowering my standards (they are high) or selling out and settling for someone who doesn't deserve my time or respect.
What does the collective feel is the right path??"
I'm confused, the site gives you access, what more do you want it to do for your tiny investment? |
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