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Cameras.
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"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers." What but lives rent free....feck that I'd throw her out  | |||
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"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers." Then why not tell me? Why not say, if I'm not here I'd rather you didn't go in my room? Why be sneaky and set up a hidden camera? | |||
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"One of the girls from work lives with me. We're open about pretty much everything, I thought we got on well and trusted each other. She goes in my room, no issue with that. I've never been told she doesn't want me in hers and I regularly go in there when she's in there. She wasn't home and I went in her room looking for something. A few minutes later I get a text asking me what I was looking for in her room. So.... She's got some kind of motion sensor camera thingy set up that I knew nothing about. I'm really upset she feels the need to have a camera in her room. I feel like I've been spied on. Yeah, I probably should have messaged her and asked about the item, but I thought we were closer than that. I feel bad I've pissed her off, but more upset about the camera. It's my house, she pays no rent or anything like that. Can I have some opinions please? " she's insecure,she's robbed a bank and the looks in that room, she has a stash of double choc chip cookies and knows you love em, she was planning to fuck her latest man that night and wanted to film it  | |||
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"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers. What but lives rent free....feck that I'd throw her out "Paying rent or not is a totally separate matter. Respecting someone’s privacy is basic manners. | |||
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"One of the girls from work lives with me. We're open about pretty much everything, I thought we got on well and trusted each other. She goes in my room, no issue with that. I've never been told she doesn't want me in hers and I regularly go in there when she's in there. She wasn't home and I went in her room looking for something. A few minutes later I get a text asking me what I was looking for in her room. So.... She's got some kind of motion sensor camera thingy set up that I knew nothing about. I'm really upset she feels the need to have a camera in her room. I feel like I've been spied on. Yeah, I probably should have messaged her and asked about the item, but I thought we were closer than that. I feel bad I've pissed her off, but more upset about the camera. It's my house, she pays no rent or anything like that. Can I have some opinions please? she's insecure,she's robbed a bank and the looks in that room, she has a stash of double choc chip cookies and knows you love em, she was planning to fuck her latest man that night and wanted to film it "loot I typed loot | |||
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"First thing I’d wonder is what the tone of her question was? Was it accusatory, as in ‘why the bloody hell were you in my room?’? Or was it a bit friendlier, and her just trying to be helpful, as in if she knew what you were looking for, she might be able to point you in the right direction?" I'm unsure as it was a text. I told her outright and she said I should have asked her. Yes I should, but at the same time I knew she was in hospital having her head glued back together after an accident at work. | |||
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"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers. What but lives rent free....feck that I'd throw her out
Paying rent or not is a totally separate matter. Respecting someone’s privacy is basic manners."And not to be fecking sneaky in someone else's home is basic manners too | |||
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"Shit on her pillows " No need for that, Lacey.  | |||
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"Seems strange that she has set up a camera if that's what it was, If she didn't want you going into her room while she wasn't home why didn't she say something to you or ask if you minded her putting a lock on the door" Exactly my point. I wouldn't have minded at all. | |||
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"I'd be a little miffed she was living under my roof for free, felt it acceptable to go in my room, but sets up a camera in hers... If someone felt it ok to go in my room, I'd expect it to be ok if I went in there's. Trust works both ways. " Yep. Apparently not. | |||
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"She's a bit cheeky if it's your house and she doesn't even pay rent. Tell her she can pay rent and you'll stick a lock on her door."  | |||
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"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers. What but lives rent free....feck that I'd throw her out "This! Definitely | |||
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"It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore. " ask her to leave | |||
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"Seems strange that she has set up a camera if that's what it was, If she didn't want you going into her room while she wasn't home why didn't she say something to you or ask if you minded her putting a lock on the door Exactly my point. I wouldn't have minded at all. " I would speak to her about it, Ask her why she felt the need to set one up and has she got anymore 
If you can't trust someone you're sharing a house with it wont work in the long term, That goes both ways
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"It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore. " Personally I’d sit her down, have a nice brew and tell her how this has made me feel in my own home. I’d ask what her motives are for setting a camera up and if her answers didn’t relieve my anxieties I’d ask her to start looking for somewhere else to live ASAP. | |||
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"She’s a cheeky mare. It’s not just that she doesn’t pay rent it’s all the other stuff too. She might have been good to you when you were poorly but you’ve been bloody good to her too. She takes advantage of your kind nature. You’re so open with her so why she didn’t just say she’d rather you didn’t go into her room is beyond me. That poor bloody hamster would have died at lot sooner if you didn’t go into her room sometimes! "True that. | |||
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"It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore. " There's your answer. I'd ask her to find somewhere else to stay. I'd also be wondering if she'd put cameras in the bathroom or my room. Unless you've been stealing from her it's a really weird thing to do. Especially as she pays no rent. Hope you can get it sorted. | |||
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"That would freak me out a bit knowing someone has set up a canera in my own home anyway. " It has me. | |||
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"It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore. There's your answer. I'd ask her to find somewhere else to stay. I'd also be wondering if she'd put cameras in the bathroom or my room. Unless you've been stealing from her it's a really weird thing to do. Especially as she pays no rent. Hope you can get it sorted. " Her brothers stole from her, which is partly the reason I let her move in. We've spoken countless times and she's said how relieving it is to not need a lock on her door and to know her stuff is safe. I'm proper freaked out and confused | |||
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"It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore. There's your answer. I'd ask her to find somewhere else to stay. I'd also be wondering if she'd put cameras in the bathroom or my room. Unless you've been stealing from her it's a really weird thing to do. Especially as she pays no rent. Hope you can get it sorted. Her brothers stole from her, which is partly the reason I let her move in. We've spoken countless times and she's said how relieving it is to not need a lock on her door and to know her stuff is safe. I'm proper freaked out and confused " I wasn't inferring that you *were* stealing, it was just a comment. x Could be she's paranoid and always had a camera because of her past. It might make her feel safe. Maybe have an open chat with her and see how you feel then. Hugs xx | |||
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"I'd be a little miffed she was living under my roof for free, felt it acceptable to go in my room, but sets up a camera in hers... If someone felt it ok to go in my room, I'd expect it to be ok if I went in there's. Trust works both ways. " | |||
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"It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore. There's your answer. I'd ask her to find somewhere else to stay. I'd also be wondering if she'd put cameras in the bathroom or my room. Unless you've been stealing from her it's a really weird thing to do. Especially as she pays no rent. Hope you can get it sorted. Her brothers stole from her, which is partly the reason I let her move in. We've spoken countless times and she's said how relieving it is to not need a lock on her door and to know her stuff is safe. I'm proper freaked out and confused " It all sounds a bit mad Peach. Setting up cameras in someone else's home seems a bit creepy to say the least no matter the context  | |||
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"It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore. Personally I’d sit her down, have a nice brew and tell her how this has made me feel in my own home. I’d ask what her motives are for setting a camera up and if her answers didn’t relieve my anxieties I’d ask her to start looking for somewhere else to live ASAP." Exactly this | |||
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"@Peach. Get her out of your house as fast as possible. Once gone, get an expert in to sweep your house for bugs and cameras. Before you do that that though, reset your home router to factory defaults. Then input a different but secure password and don't under any circumstances let her have access to it." This sounds rather dramatic. Please tell me why. | |||
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"You have discovered one camera or sensor. Might there be more?" I don't think so, not really. But hey, I didn't think there would be any at all. | |||
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"@Peach. Get her out of your house as fast as possible. Once gone, get an expert in to sweep your house for bugs and cameras. Before you do that that though, reset your home router to factory defaults. Then input a different but secure password and don't under any circumstances let her have access to it. This sounds rather dramatic. Please tell me why." Because the only way she knew you went into her room was because you gave her access to your router. Because she has been devious in setting up a camera in her room connected to your router she is not to be trusted. You have to set it to factory default because you would have no ides if she has set up a VPN as well. Do as i said, and then make shure she has no physical access to you router. | |||
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"Ask her y she has a spy cam in her room doesnt she trust u or is it in fear of being burgled ? So to catch the culprit on camera ? Maybe its for security. " If it's for security then maybe she could have told me. | |||
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"It honestly doesn't feel like my own home anymore. Personally I’d sit her down, have a nice brew and tell her how this has made me feel in my own home. I’d ask what her motives are for setting a camera up and if her answers didn’t relieve my anxieties I’d ask her to start looking for somewhere else to live ASAP. Exactly this "I would probably say this too. It would thoroughly piss me off if I’d taken someone in under those circumstances and they set up a camera like that. It infers a total lack of trust in you and is deeply hypocritical seeing as how she’s comfortable going into your room too. A long conversation is needed and a firm but gentle push out of the door. | |||
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"Ask her y she has a spy cam in her room doesnt she trust u or is it in fear of being burgled ? So to catch the culprit on camera ? Maybe its for security. If it's for security then maybe she could have told me. " If it’s for security then why just her room? | |||
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"Should we just fuck in her room? " I second that | |||
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"I've messaged and told her to get a lock if she doesn't trust me or to go. She doesn't understand why I'm upset. We're gonna talk " What was the reason you went into the room? But when you talk you should ask her to find her own place or pay the going rate for rent. It's an insult to your generousty to install a camera in your house like that. | |||
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"As someone who has rented shared houses, been a lodger and a landlord, if you have given her a room then it's HER room and it's no longer YOUR house. It's a SHARED house. If her room is not her room then you should not refer to it as such. Call it the spare room or the guest room and keep towels or something in there. If you have agreed she can have that space as her own it is really not fair to be upset she treated it like her own. If you haven't told her she can't have cameras or that she cant treat it as her own then she really hasn't done anything wrong. Just talk to her. " She doesn't show him this respect as she goes into his room | |||
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"I've messaged and told her to get a lock if she doesn't trust me or to go. She doesn't understand why I'm upset. We're gonna talk What was the reason you went into the room? But when you talk you should ask her to find her own place or pay the going rate for rent. It's an insult to your generousty to install a camera in your house like that." I was looking for something and was pretty sure I knew where it was. I didn't wanna disturb her coz I knew she was busy. Hindsight eh. | |||
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"You have discovered one camera or sensor. Might there be more?" Did you find the camera You should have removed it if you did, and make sure she has none elsewhere. Is she running a website cam show from your home | |||
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"As someone who has rented shared houses, been a lodger and a landlord, if you have given her a room then it's HER room and it's no longer YOUR house. It's a SHARED house. If her room is not her room then you should not refer to it as such. Call it the spare room or the guest room and keep towels or something in there. If you have agreed she can have that space as her own it is really not fair to be upset she treated it like her own. If you haven't told her she can't have cameras or that she cant treat it as her own then she really hasn't done anything wrong. Just talk to her. " She was having issues and when my son moved out I said she could have his room, but if he wanted to move back home then he could, and she'd have to find somewhere else. | |||
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"You have discovered one camera or sensor. Might there be more? Did you find the camera You should have removed it if you did, and make sure she has none elsewhere. Is she running a website cam show from your home" I've not been back in since. I guessed there was something she was trying to protect, so I wasn't gonna go snooping or do anything to make things more uncomfortable for either of us. | |||
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"She’s a cheeky mare. It’s not just that she doesn’t pay rent it’s all the other stuff too. She might have been good to you when you were poorly but you’ve been bloody good to her too. She takes advantage of your kind nature. You’re so open with her so why she didn’t just say she’d rather you didn’t go into her room is beyond me. That poor bloody hamster would have died at lot sooner if you didn’t go into her room sometimes! "Yep. Peach knows my thoughts on this She's taking the fucking piss. | |||
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"Firstly she is taking the piss Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored She doesn't pull her weight She causes hassle with the neighbours She makes no contribution The room is a fucking mess You are not her mother Send her the fuck home to grow up!! " Aaaand that's me told. | |||
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"Firstly she is taking the piss Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored She doesn't pull her weight She causes hassle with the neighbours She makes no contribution The room is a fucking mess You are not her mother Send her the fuck home to grow up!! Aaaand that's me told." Not the first time Let's have a shoe on the other foot scenario What would P tell H? | |||
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"Firstly she is taking the piss Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored She doesn't pull her weight She causes hassle with the neighbours She makes no contribution The room is a fucking mess You are not her mother Send her the fuck home to grow up!! " Good God definitely send her home. | |||
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"Firstly she is taking the piss Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored She doesn't pull her weight She causes hassle with the neighbours She makes no contribution The room is a fucking mess You are not her mother Send her the fuck home to grow up!! Aaaand that's me told. Not the first time Let's have a shoe on the other foot scenario What would P tell H?" Grow some balls bitch and stop trying to people please. | |||
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"Firstly she is taking the piss Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored She doesn't pull her weight She causes hassle with the neighbours She makes no contribution The room is a fucking mess You are not her mother Send her the fuck home to grow up!! Aaaand that's me told." You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story. | |||
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"Firstly she is taking the piss Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored She doesn't pull her weight She causes hassle with the neighbours She makes no contribution The room is a fucking mess You are not her mother Send her the fuck home to grow up!! Aaaand that's me told. You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story. " Let's go throw her shit out the window. Then cake can shit on it. | |||
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"Firstly she is taking the piss Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored She doesn't pull her weight She causes hassle with the neighbours She makes no contribution The room is a fucking mess You are not her mother Send her the fuck home to grow up!! Aaaand that's me told. You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story. Let's go throw her shit out the window. Then cake can shit on it." This is a weird thing to be nominated for
But sure, I’m up for it | |||
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"Firstly she is taking the piss Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored She doesn't pull her weight She causes hassle with the neighbours She makes no contribution The room is a fucking mess You are not her mother Send her the fuck home to grow up!! Aaaand that's me told. You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story. Let's go throw her shit out the window. Then cake can shit on it." I think everyone needs a friend like you. | |||
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"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers. Then why not tell me? Why not say, if I'm not here I'd rather you didn't go in my room? Why be sneaky and set up a hidden camera? " Have you done it before?Could she have noticed if you did? Could be why she set it up. I know it is your home but you have invited her in so I think you should respect her privacy | |||
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"Firstly she is taking the piss Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored She doesn't pull her weight She causes hassle with the neighbours She makes no contribution The room is a fucking mess You are not her mother Send her the fuck home to grow up!! Aaaand that's me told. You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story. Let's go throw her shit out the window. Then cake can shit on it. This is a weird thing to be nominated for
But sure, I’m up for it "Are you the go to shitting on things guy  | |||
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"Firstly she is taking the piss Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored She doesn't pull her weight She causes hassle with the neighbours She makes no contribution The room is a fucking mess You are not her mother Send her the fuck home to grow up!! Aaaand that's me told. You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story. Let's go throw her shit out the window. Then cake can shit on it. I think everyone needs a friend like you." I don't if that's true  | |||
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"Firstly she is taking the piss Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored She doesn't pull her weight She causes hassle with the neighbours She makes no contribution The room is a fucking mess You are not her mother Send her the fuck home to grow up!! Aaaand that's me told. You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story. Let's go throw her shit out the window. Then cake can shit on it. This is a weird thing to be nominated for
But sure, I’m up for it
Are you the go to shitting on things guy "Is it cake that’s been sending the messages I’ve been hearing about? If so then doing it on some stuff is a step down | |||
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"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers. Then why not tell me? Why not say, if I'm not here I'd rather you didn't go in my room? Why be sneaky and set up a hidden camera? Have you done it before?Could she have noticed if you did? Could be why she set it up. I know it is your home but you have invited her in so I think you should respect her privacy "And I have done. I rarely go in there unless she's in there. There have been times I've walked in my front door and seen her coming out my room. I don't borrow things without asking, in fact I borrow fuck all from her. It's just all very strange. I have mentioned to friends she's been acting all secretive and "door closey" of late. We normally both have our bedroom doors open as the dog has the run of the house, but recently hers has remained shut most of the time. | |||
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"Firstly she is taking the piss Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored She doesn't pull her weight She causes hassle with the neighbours She makes no contribution The room is a fucking mess You are not her mother Send her the fuck home to grow up!! Aaaand that's me told. You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story. Let's go throw her shit out the window. Then cake can shit on it. This is a weird thing to be nominated for
But sure, I’m up for it
Are you the go to shitting on things guy "Apparently so | |||
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"Firstly she is taking the piss Secondly you have repeatedly asked her not to do things which have been ignored She doesn't pull her weight She causes hassle with the neighbours She makes no contribution The room is a fucking mess You are not her mother Send her the fuck home to grow up!! Aaaand that's me told. You know you bestie has got your back though and she’s totally right. She knows the full story. Let's go throw her shit out the window. Then cake can shit on it. This is a weird thing to be nominated for
But sure, I’m up for it
Are you the go to shitting on things guy
Is it cake that’s been sending the messages I’ve been hearing about? If so then doing it on some stuff is a step down"We all have our kinks  | |||
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"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers. Then why not tell me? Why not say, if I'm not here I'd rather you didn't go in my room? Why be sneaky and set up a hidden camera? Have you done it before?Could she have noticed if you did? Could be why she set it up. I know it is your home but you have invited her in so I think you should respect her privacy
And I have done. I rarely go in there unless she's in there. There have been times I've walked in my front door and seen her coming out my room.
I don't borrow things without asking, in fact I borrow fuck all from her.
It's just all very strange.
I have mentioned to friends she's been acting all secretive and "door closey" of late.
We normally both have our bedroom doors open as the dog has the run of the house, but recently hers has remained shut most of the time.
"I think she is sending a big message of she needs her privacy. | |||
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"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers. Then why not tell me? Why not say, if I'm not here I'd rather you didn't go in my room? Why be sneaky and set up a hidden camera? Have you done it before?Could she have noticed if you did? Could be why she set it up. I know it is your home but you have invited her in so I think you should respect her privacy
And I have done. I rarely go in there unless she's in there. There have been times I've walked in my front door and seen her coming out my room.
I don't borrow things without asking, in fact I borrow fuck all from her.
It's just all very strange.
I have mentioned to friends she's been acting all secretive and "door closey" of late.
We normally both have our bedroom doors open as the dog has the run of the house, but recently hers has remained shut most of the time.
I think she is sending a big message of she needs her privacy. "That's fine and dandy if that's what it is. She doesn't get up until early afternoon, I leave for work at 4 most days so we hardly see each other anyway. I'll pay someone to come in and look after my dog while I'm at work so she doesn't need to leave her room at all. She can get a lock on her door. Mine will remain open as I've nothing to hide. | |||
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"The trust has gone. That Honey bird talks sense. Good luck " | |||
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"The trust has gone. That Honey bird talks sense. Good luck
"The trust has gone. There have been house rules that HAVE been repeatedly ignored too, so that Honey bird talks sense there aswell. | |||
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"The trust has gone. That Honey bird talks sense. Good luck
The trust has gone.
There have been house rules that HAVE been repeatedly ignored too, so that Honey bird talks sense there aswell. "I feel like Judge Rinder right now. | |||
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"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers. Then why not tell me? Why not say, if I'm not here I'd rather you didn't go in my room? Why be sneaky and set up a hidden camera? Have you done it before?Could she have noticed if you did? Could be why she set it up. I know it is your home but you have invited her in so I think you should respect her privacy
And I have done. I rarely go in there unless she's in there. There have been times I've walked in my front door and seen her coming out my room.
I don't borrow things without asking, in fact I borrow fuck all from her.
It's just all very strange.
I have mentioned to friends she's been acting all secretive and "door closey" of late.
We normally both have our bedroom doors open as the dog has the run of the house, but recently hers has remained shut most of the time.
I think she is sending a big message of she needs her privacy.
That's fine and dandy if that's what it is.
She doesn't get up until early afternoon, I leave for work at 4 most days so we hardly see each other anyway. I'll pay someone to come in and look after my dog while I'm at work so she doesn't need to leave her room at all.
She can get a lock on her door. Mine will remain open as I've nothing to hide.
"You asked for opinions, that was mine, I didn't say it was fact and I could be way off the mark so making those decisions before talking to her and finding out what is going on probably won't help. | |||
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"Maybe she's working for Sydney University? Have you found the other cameras and microphones yet?." She's caming you wanking!! | |||
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"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers. Then why not tell me? Why not say, if I'm not here I'd rather you didn't go in my room? Why be sneaky and set up a hidden camera? Have you done it before?Could she have noticed if you did? Could be why she set it up. I know it is your home but you have invited her in so I think you should respect her privacy
And I have done. I rarely go in there unless she's in there. There have been times I've walked in my front door and seen her coming out my room.
I don't borrow things without asking, in fact I borrow fuck all from her.
It's just all very strange.
I have mentioned to friends she's been acting all secretive and "door closey" of late.
We normally both have our bedroom doors open as the dog has the run of the house, but recently hers has remained shut most of the time.
I think she is sending a big message of she needs her privacy.
That's fine and dandy if that's what it is.
She doesn't get up until early afternoon, I leave for work at 4 most days so we hardly see each other anyway. I'll pay someone to come in and look after my dog while I'm at work so she doesn't need to leave her room at all.
She can get a lock on her door. Mine will remain open as I've nothing to hide.
You asked for opinions, that was mine, I didn't say it was fact and I could be way off the mark so making those decisions before talking to her and finding out what is going on probably won't help.
"Sorry I'm tired, upset and getting a bit ratty now. I asked her to come talk when she got home and she's just gone and sat on her bed. I ain't going in there again. I do give her a ton of privacy, she only goes to work and here. Sometimes she'll go shopping but other than that she doesn't go anywhere. Her boyfriend comes over and stays some nights. I was never asked if that was ok, it was just assumed. You know what I do when I want some privacy? I go out coz I know she ain't gonna. | |||
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"That would freak me out a bit knowing someone has set up a canera in my own home anyway. " Just what i was going to say. Id be very suspicious of someone setting up a camera in MY house without my permission. That's an invasion of ur privacy in ur property. X | |||
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"That would freak me out a bit knowing someone has set up a canera in my own home anyway. Just what i was going to say. Id be very suspicious of someone setting up a camera in MY house without my permission. That's an invasion of ur privacy in ur property. X" Yep. I would take the advice above and change the router codes etc. | |||
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"It sounds like there’s a whole host of shit going down so I’m only talking about this one incident ..... Regardless of paying rent or not, if she lives with you in a room then unless you’ve agreed you can go on her room I can see why she’s assumed you wouldn’t. Regardless of how she treats your room. So camera or not, that’s a bit naughty. Whether she can put a cam up ... i struggle to see why she can’t and why she should have to tell you. It’s her right to have secrets. Her reasons may be ones she’s not comfortable with sharing. But if you want to resolve this, it needs a conversation. Why it has *insert emotion here* you. And hopefully she will offer why she did this. An then, boundaries need to be agreed. Of course if she is a Cadbury’s fruit and nut cake then what honey said. " I would like to reiterate I wasn't snooping, I was looking for a specific item and was correct as to it's location. She goes in mine and I've never ever been suspicious or felt the need to ask why. I just took it for granted she wanted to use the tall mirror coz she can't actually get to her own due to mess/borrow hair spray or deodorant etc. She can have all the secrets she wants as long as it's nothing illegal. I've the right to know if she's putting my tenancy in danger. That's the only real reason I can think she may want a camera. She's turned the light off now so it seems my request to talk has fallen on deaf ears. | |||
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"Oh god that's all just really awkward, isn't it?! Shame she's not had a chat with you before going to bed. Some of the comments (mainly resetting the thingy thing) would be making me totally paranoid!! I'd be getting a lock on my door!!! (Sorry PP)" I'm a smidge concerned in case there are others but I don't really think there are. I may need to reduce the size of the room though to build a cupboard for items like the vacuum cleaner and other stuff she might want access to that is currently stored in my room. You know, if we're gonna get funny about going in each other's rooms. Or maybe I'll just keep it in my room, get a lock on my door and she can buy her own. To be honest I won't do that. I'll leave my door open as per usual so the dog can go in if she wants. I've got fuck all to hide. | |||
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"I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd. " I know ya plum, I don't think I answered too clearly. Knew in my head what I meant but failed with the words  | |||
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"I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd. I know ya plum, I don't think I answered too clearly. Knew in my head what I meant but failed with the words "I thought I should of put why is want a lock. Sorry, too many gins on a school night
How long has she lived at yours? | |||
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"My poor pooch is sat waiting outside the door. She's been allowed in that room for the last 5 years and it has a comfy sofa in there for her (which is mine) that she's been banished from it seems. I may ask for the sofa back." House rules are what you need if she's to stay. | |||
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"I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd. I know ya plum, I don't think I answered too clearly. Knew in my head what I meant but failed with the words
I thought I should of put why is want a lock. Sorry, too many gins on a school night
How long has she lived at yours?"Since September. It was a temporary thing til she found somewhere else but she's not looked yet. | |||
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"I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd. I know ya plum, I don't think I answered too clearly. Knew in my head what I meant but failed with the words
I thought I should of put why is want a lock. Sorry, too many gins on a school night
How long has she lived at yours?
Since September.
It was a temporary thing til she found somewhere else but she's not looked yet."Hmm. Too comfortable by half. Your good nature is being taken advantage of I fear. | |||
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"My poor pooch is sat waiting outside the door. She's been allowed in that room for the last 5 years and it has a comfy sofa in there for her (which is mine) that she's been banished from it seems. I may ask for the sofa back. House rules are what you need if she's to stay. " They get broken when I'm not here. Fuck, they get broken when I am here and she thinks I'm asleep! She must think I have no sense of smell. | |||
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"I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd. I know ya plum, I don't think I answered too clearly. Knew in my head what I meant but failed with the words
I thought I should of put why is want a lock. Sorry, too many gins on a school night
How long has she lived at yours?
Since September.
It was a temporary thing til she found somewhere else but she's not looked yet.
Hmm. Too comfortable by half. Your good nature is being taken advantage of I fear."I've been told that for a good few months now. | |||
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"One of the girls from work lives with me. We're open about pretty much everything, I thought we got on well and trusted each other. She goes in my room, no issue with that. I've never been told she doesn't want me in hers and I regularly go in there when she's in there. She wasn't home and I went in her room looking for something. A few minutes later I get a text asking me what I was looking for in her room. So.... She's got some kind of motion sensor camera thingy set up that I knew nothing about. I'm really upset she feels the need to have a camera in her room. I feel like I've been spied on. Yeah, I probably should have messaged her and asked about the item, but I thought we were closer than that. I feel bad I've pissed her off, but more upset about the camera. It's my house, she pays no rent or anything like that. Can I have some opinions please? " It’s time to tell her to leave , if you want to save the friendship... | |||
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"I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd. I know ya plum, I don't think I answered too clearly. Knew in my head what I meant but failed with the words
I thought I should of put why is want a lock. Sorry, too many gins on a school night
How long has she lived at yours?
Since September.
It was a temporary thing til she found somewhere else but she's not looked yet."Bless you Peach. She probably didn't want to talk cos she has an inkling what's coming. Ie you telling her to fuck off!!! | |||
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"Both of us are rubbish at sharing our home, we struggle to tolerate over night guests. If we'd invited someone to stay we wouldn't want them in our bedroom for any reason other than to rescue us from a fire. If we discovered they'd set up a motion sensor camera in the room they were using we'd be a bit miffed. If they then used that camera to question us about what we were doing *in our own home* we'd consider the time had come for our guest to take their camera elsewhere." That's the thing, I don't treat her like a lodger or anything, she's a guest in my house. She's had it far too easy for far too long. I was doing her a favour and regardless of what others have said about respecting her privacy (which I do far more than she does mine) I feel quite invaded. | |||
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"My poor pooch is sat waiting outside the door. She's been allowed in that room for the last 5 years and it has a comfy sofa in there for her (which is mine) that she's been banished from it seems. I may ask for the sofa back. House rules are what you need if she's to stay. They get broken when I'm not here. Fuck, they get broken when I am here and she thinks I'm asleep! She must think I have no sense of smell." Well if you give a child a boundary then do nothing when it oversteps it they'll carry on doing it. Adults are the same. | |||
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"My poor pooch is sat waiting outside the door. She's been allowed in that room for the last 5 years and it has a comfy sofa in there for her (which is mine) that she's been banished from it seems. I may ask for the sofa back. House rules are what you need if she's to stay. They get broken when I'm not here. Fuck, they get broken when I am here and she thinks I'm asleep! She must think I have no sense of smell. Well if you give a child a boundary then do nothing when it oversteps it they'll carry on doing it. Adults are the same. " This is very true. Aside from turfing her out I didn't know what to do apart from turn a blind eye and hope she would see my point. When it's your kids you can give a fitting punishment, when it's a mate it's far more difficult | |||
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"Both of us are rubbish at sharing our home, we struggle to tolerate over night guests. If we'd invited someone to stay we wouldn't want them in our bedroom for any reason other than to rescue us from a fire. If we discovered they'd set up a motion sensor camera in the room they were using we'd be a bit miffed. If they then used that camera to question us about what we were doing *in our own home* we'd consider the time had come for our guest to take their camera elsewhere. That's the thing, I don't treat her like a lodger or anything, she's a guest in my house. She's had it far too easy for far too long. I was doing her a favour and regardless of what others have said about respecting her privacy (which I do far more than she does mine) I feel quite invaded. " You're treating her as a guest but she's not behaving like one. I think you have three options. Ask her to leave. Set up house rules and insist that they and your home are respected. Say nothing and continue as you are. How does the current arrangement benefit you? | |||
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"My poor pooch is sat waiting outside the door. She's been allowed in that room for the last 5 years and it has a comfy sofa in there for her (which is mine) that she's been banished from it seems. I may ask for the sofa back. House rules are what you need if she's to stay. They get broken when I'm not here. Fuck, they get broken when I am here and she thinks I'm asleep! She must think I have no sense of smell. Well if you give a child a boundary then do nothing when it oversteps it they'll carry on doing it. Adults are the same. This is very true. Aside from turfing her out I didn't know what to do apart from turn a blind eye and hope she would see my point. When it's your kids you can give a fitting punishment, when it's a mate it's far more difficult " Sorry I'm answering earlier posts while you're answering my later ones  .
Turning a blind eye is an option but she won't see your point, why would she?
You don't need to punish but you can very firmly say that you have a couple of rules you want her to abide by and if she feels she's unable to unfortunately you will have to aske her to find somewhere else to live within a month.
It's tough being firm with people but sometimes it has to be done or they take you for a mug. | |||
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"Both of us are rubbish at sharing our home, we struggle to tolerate over night guests. If we'd invited someone to stay we wouldn't want them in our bedroom for any reason other than to rescue us from a fire. If we discovered they'd set up a motion sensor camera in the room they were using we'd be a bit miffed. If they then used that camera to question us about what we were doing *in our own home* we'd consider the time had come for our guest to take their camera elsewhere. That's the thing, I don't treat her like a lodger or anything, she's a guest in my house. She's had it far too easy for far too long. I was doing her a favour and regardless of what others have said about respecting her privacy (which I do far more than she does mine) I feel quite invaded. You're treating her as a guest but she's not behaving like one. I think you have three options. Ask her to leave. Set up house rules and insist that they and your home are respected. Say nothing and continue as you are. How does the current arrangement benefit you?" I have someone to take care of the dog when I'm not here. That's the only plus. That and knowing I was helping her. If she has work on a morning, I don't have people here (I made that cock up once and was told my friends were disrespectful, she needs her sleep and if it happened again she'd knock the noisy one out) Zero financial benefit. She does no housework or gardening. She's really fucking messy in every room other than mine. | |||
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"Shit on her pillows " Or post a listing on the forum and find someone who will enjoy shitting on her pillow and let her check the camera for that one | |||
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"In short I'm being taken for a mug " Let's say your good nature is being taken advantage of. Sometimes you need to see things in black and white to realise how bad they've become. What are you going to do? | |||
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"In short I'm being taken for a mug Let's say your good nature is being taken advantage of. Sometimes you need to see things in black and white to realise how bad they've become. What are you going to do?" Yeah! What are you going to do? Can we take bets? | |||
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"In short I'm being taken for a mug Let's say your good nature is being taken advantage of. Sometimes you need to see things in black and white to realise how bad they've become. What are you going to do?" I'm gonna tell her if she wants a lock on her door that's fine. No cameras. None. I'm gonna draw up a chores list, no fucking about, no moaning about being tired from work. It gets done and that's that. I'm gonna tell her that incense doesn't mask the smell she's trying to hide and that what I previously said still stands. No smoking that shit in my house. I'm gonna tell her if she doesn't like it, I'll have my spare key back thanking you muchly. | |||
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"I've got a fifty that says the next thing you say is "Hi, you alright?" When passing in the hallway. "We don't pass. Last time she knew she pissed me off she hid for the day. She thought I was asleep and I'd taken the bottle of pop up to my room instead of putting it back in the fridge. She shouted from the kitchen "you've taken the bottle upstairs .... are you taking the fucking piss?" I called down to her, are you looking for the pop? And left it by the bedroom door. A full day it took for her to face me. | |||
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"I've got a fifty that says the next thing you say is "Hi, you alright?" When passing in the hallway.
We don't pass. Last time she knew she pissed me off she hid for the day.
She thought I was asleep and I'd taken the bottle of pop up to my room instead of putting it back in the fridge. She shouted from the kitchen "you've taken the bottle upstairs .... are you taking the fucking piss?"
I called down to her, are you looking for the pop? And left it by the bedroom door.
A full day it took for her to face me."Who bought the pop just out of interest? You sound a very tolerant person to put up with all that crap. Why isn't she paying towards any bill's if she's working,she should offer cheeky bitch. | |||
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"I've got a fifty that says the next thing you say is "Hi, you alright?" When passing in the hallway.
We don't pass. Last time she knew she pissed me off she hid for the day.
She thought I was asleep and I'd taken the bottle of pop up to my room instead of putting it back in the fridge. She shouted from the kitchen "you've taken the bottle upstairs .... are you taking the fucking piss?"
I called down to her, are you looking for the pop? And left it by the bedroom door.
A full day it took for her to face me."make her homeless cmon she's a biatch, put your foot down | |||
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"I've just read the whole thread and all your posts op, it sounds quite bad! One thing that pops out to me is that you rent your property, is that private or local authority? If it's private, is she a permitted tenant? Does your landlord know? If not I'd use that as a good excuse to ask her too leave. Good luck " shhhhhh council don't know | |||
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"I'm gonna tell her to put a lock on her door or fuck off I think. I'm not having spy cams in my home. That's a line that doesn't get crossed as far as I'm concerned. Urghhh, but now it has me questioning is it just her room there's sensors?! " The trust is gone, it's time for her to go too! | |||
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"If she’s smoking waccy baccy then the camera is most likely to protect her stash. She sounds aggressive and a nightmare. I’d ask her to leave. Pronto. I’d also change my locks. If she has a boyfriend then he can look after her." let's all pop round and help her throw her out...... Ease the burden | |||
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"The trust has gone. That Honey bird talks sense. Good luck
The trust has gone.
There have been house rules that HAVE been repeatedly ignored too, so that Honey bird talks sense there aswell. "If it was only a temporary arrangement to help her out, why have you never asked her for rent since? Get Judge Rinder Honey on the case. | |||
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"If she’s smoking waccy baccy then the camera is most likely to protect her stash. She sounds aggressive and a nightmare. I’d ask her to leave. Pronto. I’d also change my locks. If she has a boyfriend then he can look after her.let's all pop round and help her throw her out...... Ease the burden "I'm in. | |||
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"Locks on doors ....end of problem ." yes front door stuff in black bags outside it, their ya go another wrong righted | |||
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"Both of us are rubbish at sharing our home, we struggle to tolerate over night guests. If we'd invited someone to stay we wouldn't want them in our bedroom for any reason other than to rescue us from a fire. If we discovered they'd set up a motion sensor camera in the room they were using we'd be a bit miffed. If they then used that camera to question us about what we were doing *in our own home* we'd consider the time had come for our guest to take their camera elsewhere." Same here | |||
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"Ask her y she has a spy cam in her room doesnt she trust u or is it in fear of being burgled ? So to catch the culprit on camera ? Maybe its for security. If it's for security then maybe she could have told me. " Yes def she should of told u and maybe suggested u did the same thing | |||
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"I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd. I know ya plum, I don't think I answered too clearly. Knew in my head what I meant but failed with the words
I thought I should of put why is want a lock. Sorry, too many gins on a school night
How long has she lived at yours?
Since September.
It was a temporary thing til she found somewhere else but she's not looked yet.
Hmm. Too comfortable by half. Your good nature is being taken advantage of I fear.
I've been told that for a good few months now."All this has obv affected your relationship its making u uncomfortable in your own home ... she doesnt adhere to your house rules .... it was a temporary offer of a place to stay ... time to ask her to move out i think . Good luck xx | |||
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"It’s very rude to go in someone’s room without their permission "omg WW5 you've just started | |||
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"It’s very rude to go in someone’s room without their permission "Exactly. It's the OPs room, not her guests. Her guest clearly has permission to be in it, but it is not her room, it is the OPs room. | |||
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"I've got a fifty that says the next thing you say is "Hi, you alright?" When passing in the hallway.
We don't pass. Last time she knew she pissed me off she hid for the day.
She thought I was asleep and I'd taken the bottle of pop up to my room instead of putting it back in the fridge. She shouted from the kitchen "you've taken the bottle upstairs .... are you taking the fucking piss?"
I called down to her, are you looking for the pop? And left it by the bedroom door.
A full day it took for her to face me.
Who bought the pop just out of interest? You sound a very tolerant person to put up with all that crap. Why isn't she paying towards any bill's if she's working,she should offer cheeky bitch."She'd brought that bottle. She has no issues in eating/drinking the things that I buy and leave in the kitchen, I don't mind either unless it's the last mouthful of chocolate or something! I just think if it's there, have it. She normally has a bottle that's solely hers in her room. I was paying the bills anyway, whether she was here or not. The only thing I ask her to do is put gas and electricity in the meter as that IS an extra cost once I've put my normal amount on and it's all been used. I thought it would be a nice thing to let her save up for a decent deposit for somewhere else rather than take money off her for bills that I'm paying anyway. | |||
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"I've got a fifty that says the next thing you say is "Hi, you alright?" When passing in the hallway.
We don't pass. Last time she knew she pissed me off she hid for the day.
She thought I was asleep and I'd taken the bottle of pop up to my room instead of putting it back in the fridge. She shouted from the kitchen "you've taken the bottle upstairs .... are you taking the fucking piss?"
I called down to her, are you looking for the pop? And left it by the bedroom door.
A full day it took for her to face me.
Who bought the pop just out of interest? You sound a very tolerant person to put up with all that crap. Why isn't she paying towards any bill's if she's working,she should offer cheeky bitch.
She'd brought that bottle.
She has no issues in eating/drinking the things that I buy and leave in the kitchen, I don't mind either unless it's the last mouthful of chocolate or something! I just think if it's there, have it. She normally has a bottle that's solely hers in her room.
I was paying the bills anyway, whether she was here or not. The only thing I ask her to do is put gas and electricity in the meter as that IS an extra cost once I've put my normal amount on and it's all been used.
I thought it would be a nice thing to let her save up for a decent deposit for somewhere else rather than take money off her for bills that I'm paying anyway. "...and it's great of you to do that,she's lucky she had you to give her a roof over her head. If you had taken me in I would be eternally grateful and respectful of your home. I wouldn't be leaving your home a mess in every room,I wouldn't be smoking god knows what in your home and I sure as heck wouldn't be setting up a camera in your home. She sounds a brat how old is she? | |||
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"I've got a fifty that says the next thing you say is "Hi, you alright?" When passing in the hallway.
We don't pass. Last time she knew she pissed me off she hid for the day.
She thought I was asleep and I'd taken the bottle of pop up to my room instead of putting it back in the fridge. She shouted from the kitchen "you've taken the bottle upstairs .... are you taking the fucking piss?"
I called down to her, are you looking for the pop? And left it by the bedroom door.
A full day it took for her to face me.
Who bought the pop just out of interest? You sound a very tolerant person to put up with all that crap. Why isn't she paying towards any bill's if she's working,she should offer cheeky bitch.
She'd brought that bottle.
She has no issues in eating/drinking the things that I buy and leave in the kitchen, I don't mind either unless it's the last mouthful of chocolate or something! I just think if it's there, have it. She normally has a bottle that's solely hers in her room.
I was paying the bills anyway, whether she was here or not. The only thing I ask her to do is put gas and electricity in the meter as that IS an extra cost once I've put my normal amount on and it's all been used.
I thought it would be a nice thing to let her save up for a decent deposit for somewhere else rather than take money off her for bills that I'm paying anyway.
...and it's great of you to do that,she's lucky she had you to give her a roof over her head.
If you had taken me in I would be eternally grateful and respectful of your home. I wouldn't be leaving your home a mess in every room,I wouldn't be smoking god knows what in your home and I sure as heck wouldn't be setting up a camera in your home.
She sounds a brat how old is she?"She's just turned 25, had a pretty shitty home life growing up. | |||
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"One of the girls from work lives with me. We're open about pretty much everything, I thought we got on well and trusted each other. She goes in my room, no issue with that. I've never been told she doesn't want me in hers and I regularly go in there when she's in there. She wasn't home and I went in her room looking for something. A few minutes later I get a text asking me what I was looking for in her room. So.... She's got some kind of motion sensor camera thingy set up that I knew nothing about. I'm really upset she feels the need to have a camera in her room. I feel like I've been spied on. Yeah, I probably should have messaged her and asked about the item, but I thought we were closer than that. I feel bad I've pissed her off, but more upset about the camera. It's my house, she pays no rent or anything like that. Can I have some opinions please? " If she pays no rent and she's been living there more than 6 months you might find half the house is hers. | |||
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"One of the girls from work lives with me. We're open about pretty much everything, I thought we got on well and trusted each other. She goes in my room, no issue with that. I've never been told she doesn't want me in hers and I regularly go in there when she's in there. She wasn't home and I went in her room looking for something. A few minutes later I get a text asking me what I was looking for in her room. So.... She's got some kind of motion sensor camera thingy set up that I knew nothing about. I'm really upset she feels the need to have a camera in her room. I feel like I've been spied on. Yeah, I probably should have messaged her and asked about the item, but I thought we were closer than that. I feel bad I've pissed her off, but more upset about the camera. It's my house, she pays no rent or anything like that. Can I have some opinions please? If she pays no rent and she's been living there more than 6 months you might find half the house is hers." | |||
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"One of the girls from work lives with me. We're open about pretty much everything, I thought we got on well and trusted each other. She goes in my room, no issue with that. I've never been told she doesn't want me in hers and I regularly go in there when she's in there. She wasn't home and I went in her room looking for something. A few minutes later I get a text asking me what I was looking for in her room. So.... She's got some kind of motion sensor camera thingy set up that I knew nothing about. I'm really upset she feels the need to have a camera in her room. I feel like I've been spied on. Yeah, I probably should have messaged her and asked about the item, but I thought we were closer than that. I feel bad I've pissed her off, but more upset about the camera. It's my house, she pays no rent or anything like that. Can I have some opinions please? If she pays no rent and she's been living there more than 6 months you might find half the house is hers." That sounds stupid enough to be true. | |||
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"I've got a fifty that says the next thing you say is "Hi, you alright?" When passing in the hallway.
We don't pass. Last time she knew she pissed me off she hid for the day.
She thought I was asleep and I'd taken the bottle of pop up to my room instead of putting it back in the fridge. She shouted from the kitchen "you've taken the bottle upstairs .... are you taking the fucking piss?"
I called down to her, are you looking for the pop? And left it by the bedroom door.
A full day it took for her to face me.
Who bought the pop just out of interest? You sound a very tolerant person to put up with all that crap. Why isn't she paying towards any bill's if she's working,she should offer cheeky bitch.
She'd brought that bottle.
She has no issues in eating/drinking the things that I buy and leave in the kitchen, I don't mind either unless it's the last mouthful of chocolate or something! I just think if it's there, have it. She normally has a bottle that's solely hers in her room.
I was paying the bills anyway, whether she was here or not. The only thing I ask her to do is put gas and electricity in the meter as that IS an extra cost once I've put my normal amount on and it's all been used.
I thought it would be a nice thing to let her save up for a decent deposit for somewhere else rather than take money off her for bills that I'm paying anyway.
...and it's great of you to do that,she's lucky she had you to give her a roof over her head.
If you had taken me in I would be eternally grateful and respectful of your home. I wouldn't be leaving your home a mess in every room,I wouldn't be smoking god knows what in your home and I sure as heck wouldn't be setting up a camera in your home.
She sounds a brat how old is she?
She's just turned 25, had a pretty shitty home life growing up. "You have done a lovely thing for her and it shows you are a caring person (and extremely tolerant). Just because she had a shitty up bringing, doesn't give her the right to be shitty to you. She should be bloody great full. I had a shitty up bringing, but it's no excuse for her behaviour. I'd never treat a friend that way. By the age of 25 you know the difference right and wrong. | |||
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" Sorry I'm tired, upset and getting a bit ratty now. I asked her to come talk when she got home and she's just gone and sat on her bed. I ain't going in there again. I do give her a ton of privacy, she only goes to work and here. Sometimes she'll go shopping but other than that she doesn't go anywhere. Her boyfriend comes over and stays some nights. I was never asked if that was ok, it was just assumed. You know what I do when I want some privacy? I go out coz I know she ain't gonna." To be fair there seems to be more issues that you are not happy with than just her catching you in her room but none of them have anything to do with the woman wanting privacy in the room your have let her have. Are you upset more that she has felt the need to check how many times you go into her room when she is not there or the fact she knows you went in because of what she has set up? Yes you have done a lovely thing by helping someone out but if it came with conditions then maybe that should have been discussed when she moved in. Either way it sounds like it isn't working so maybe time to let her find somewhere else to live | |||
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" Sorry I'm tired, upset and getting a bit ratty now. I asked her to come talk when she got home and she's just gone and sat on her bed. I ain't going in there again. I do give her a ton of privacy, she only goes to work and here. Sometimes she'll go shopping but other than that she doesn't go anywhere. Her boyfriend comes over and stays some nights. I was never asked if that was ok, it was just assumed. You know what I do when I want some privacy? I go out coz I know she ain't gonna. To be fair there seems to be more issues that you are not happy with than just her catching you in her room but none of them have anything to do with the woman wanting privacy in the room your have let her have. Are you upset more that she has felt the need to check how many times you go into her room when she is not there or the fact she knows you went in because of what she has set up? Yes you have done a lovely thing by helping someone out but if it came with conditions then maybe that should have been discussed when she moved in. Either way it sounds like it isn't working so maybe time to let her find somewhere else to live "I'm upset because there's been a camera set up in my house without my knowledge. I'm upset she deems it acceptable to use every room of my house, yet I get questioned over going in one of them. I'm upset because now I'm wondering what she's hiding, is my tenancy being put in danger? I'm upset that rather than talk to me if there's something bothering her, she's been sneaky in setting up a device to monitor my movement. I reckon since her hamster died I've been in there maybe twice when she's not been here. That was February. | |||
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" Sorry I'm tired, upset and getting a bit ratty now. I asked her to come talk when she got home and she's just gone and sat on her bed. I ain't going in there again. I do give her a ton of privacy, she only goes to work and here. Sometimes she'll go shopping but other than that she doesn't go anywhere. Her boyfriend comes over and stays some nights. I was never asked if that was ok, it was just assumed. You know what I do when I want some privacy? I go out coz I know she ain't gonna. To be fair there seems to be more issues that you are not happy with than just her catching you in her room but none of them have anything to do with the woman wanting privacy in the room your have let her have. Are you upset more that she has felt the need to check how many times you go into her room when she is not there or the fact she knows you went in because of what she has set up? Yes you have done a lovely thing by helping someone out but if it came with conditions then maybe that should have been discussed when she moved in. Either way it sounds like it isn't working so maybe time to let her find somewhere else to live
I'm upset because there's been a camera set up in my house without my knowledge.
I'm upset she deems it acceptable to use every room of my house, yet I get questioned over going in one of them.
I'm upset because now I'm wondering what she's hiding, is my tenancy being put in danger?
I'm upset that rather than talk to me if there's something bothering her, she's been sneaky in setting up a device to monitor my movement.
I reckon since her hamster died I've been in there maybe twice when she's not been here. That was February. "How would you feel if your kindness gets you kicked out by your landlord? That's too much upset for even the kindest person. Think of yourself. | |||
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"Everyone is entitled to their privacy. She obviously feels that you don’t respect hers. Then why not tell me? Why not say, if I'm not here I'd rather you didn't go in my room? Why be sneaky and set up a hidden camera? " Humans are confrontational creatures maybe this way you'll pay her rent money | |||
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"After reading the rest....you don't have to put up with being unhappy and you sound unhappy with how it has been going ( even before the camera thing ) and as she isn't paying anything towards rent and I am guessing not on the tenancy agreement then I would tell her to find somewhere else to live. She has had long enough to help herself get some money together" Yeah I'm pretty miserable to be fair. I think trust and respect works both ways but it doesn't feel like it's happening. | |||
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" Sorry I'm tired, upset and getting a bit ratty now. I asked her to come talk when she got home and she's just gone and sat on her bed. I ain't going in there again. I do give her a ton of privacy, she only goes to work and here. Sometimes she'll go shopping but other than that she doesn't go anywhere. Her boyfriend comes over and stays some nights. I was never asked if that was ok, it was just assumed. You know what I do when I want some privacy? I go out coz I know she ain't gonna. To be fair there seems to be more issues that you are not happy with than just her catching you in her room but none of them have anything to do with the woman wanting privacy in the room your have let her have. Are you upset more that she has felt the need to check how many times you go into her room when she is not there or the fact she knows you went in because of what she has set up? Yes you have done a lovely thing by helping someone out but if it came with conditions then maybe that should have been discussed when she moved in. Either way it sounds like it isn't working so maybe time to let her find somewhere else to live
I'm upset because there's been a camera set up in my house without my knowledge.
I'm upset she deems it acceptable to use every room of my house, yet I get questioned over going in one of them.
I'm upset because now I'm wondering what she's hiding, is my tenancy being put in danger?
I'm upset that rather than talk to me if there's something bothering her, she's been sneaky in setting up a device to monitor my movement.
I reckon since her hamster died I've been in there maybe twice when she's not been here. That was February.
How would you feel if your kindness gets you kicked out by your landlord? That's too much upset for even the kindest person. Think of yourself. "This is my major concern. *big fucking sigh* | |||
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" Sorry I'm tired, upset and getting a bit ratty now. I asked her to come talk when she got home and she's just gone and sat on her bed. I ain't going in there again. I do give her a ton of privacy, she only goes to work and here. Sometimes she'll go shopping but other than that she doesn't go anywhere. Her boyfriend comes over and stays some nights. I was never asked if that was ok, it was just assumed. You know what I do when I want some privacy? I go out coz I know she ain't gonna. To be fair there seems to be more issues that you are not happy with than just her catching you in her room but none of them have anything to do with the woman wanting privacy in the room your have let her have. Are you upset more that she has felt the need to check how many times you go into her room when she is not there or the fact she knows you went in because of what she has set up? Yes you have done a lovely thing by helping someone out but if it came with conditions then maybe that should have been discussed when she moved in. Either way it sounds like it isn't working so maybe time to let her find somewhere else to live
I'm upset because there's been a camera set up in my house without my knowledge.
I'm upset she deems it acceptable to use every room of my house, yet I get questioned over going in one of them.
I'm upset because now I'm wondering what she's hiding, is my tenancy being put in danger?
I'm upset that rather than talk to me if there's something bothering her, she's been sneaky in setting up a device to monitor my movement.
I reckon since her hamster died I've been in there maybe twice when she's not been here. That was February. "You've perpetuated the not talking about issues though. It needs discussion and if she's the type who refuses to engage in discussion then she needs to know there is only one other option and Its the other side of the front door. | |||
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"I think I'd suggest being the bigger person, even apologising for any upset or misunderstanding. Then see if you can agree on a suitable protocol for going into each others private spaces (for innocent purposes,of course). I'd say you would be quite justified in raising concern about the surveillance camera though. Im presuming you want to stay friends so maybe the diplomatic option is best. " I did apologise. As soon as she messaged me asking what I was looking for I apologised and told her, along with the reasoning I didn't ask her ( A - I was pretty certain I knew where it was, and went straight to it. Wasn't gonna go hunting if it wasn't where I thought. B- She was in the hospital having her head glued after an accident at work) | |||
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"I think I'd suggest being the bigger person, even apologising for any upset or misunderstanding. Then see if you can agree on a suitable protocol for going into each others private spaces (for innocent purposes,of course). I'd say you would be quite justified in raising concern about the surveillance camera though. Im presuming you want to stay friends so maybe the diplomatic option is best. I did apologise. As soon as she messaged me asking what I was looking for I apologised and told her, along with the reasoning I didn't ask her ( A - I was pretty certain I knew where it was, and went straight to it. Wasn't gonna go hunting if it wasn't where I thought. B- She was in the hospital having her head glued after an accident at work) " It seems to me that you've acted reasonably. It may still be a good idea to reach an agreement about going into each others rooms,to avoid the issue coming up again. | |||
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"I meant I'd be getting a lock on my door because her behaviour seems a bit odd. I know ya plum, I don't think I answered too clearly. Knew in my head what I meant but failed with the words
I thought I should of put why is want a lock. Sorry, too many gins on a school night
How long has she lived at yours?
Since September.
It was a temporary thing til she found somewhere else but she's not looked yet.
Hmm. Too comfortable by half. Your good nature is being taken advantage of I fear."This. ^ | |||
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