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So ladies what does being a sub entail?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The exact opposite of the type of person you are, I'd say. "
I know, that's what I was thinking if I'm honest. Speaking to a guy today who is into D/s stuff and wants me to be the sub. Some of the stuff he's saying and the way I'm being addressed isn't what I'm used to, but I'm happy to learn. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The exact opposite of the type of person you are, I'd say.
I know, that's what I was thinking if I'm honest. Speaking to a guy today who is into D/s stuff and wants me to be the sub. Some of the stuff he's saying and the way I'm being addressed isn't what I'm used to, but I'm happy to learn. "
Well there's no need for you to have to jump in at the deep end, if he's actually in to D/s (and hasn't just watched too much 50 Shades) he should be able to ease you in comfortably
C |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Suppose it depends what you and he means by "sub"
So many diffrent ways and it depends on personalitys and dynamics.
Had a few men try to be my "Dom" and failed misrably. Purley down to me being a brat and not a true submissive.
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
It's not only ladies who are submissives you know
And being honest OP, it's as much a state of mind as something you can become. You either have submissive interests and leanings or you don't, also what "being a submissive" will mean to one person, may well differ completely from what it is to the next.
If you're seriously interested in the dynamic OP you could do a lot worse than read books like "SM101" or "Screw The Roses Bring Me The Thorns" both of which are available from Amazon, or any number of decent websites on the subject - in fact my recommendation to anyone contemplating D/s play would be to read, read and read some more before even considering playing, and then communicate, communicate, communicate with anyone that you're considering playing with.
Of course it depends how seriously you want to get into it, and to what level - there's a huge difference between occasionally allowing yourself to be handcuffed and entering into a full blown D/s dynamic |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You can't really learn to be a sub if it's not you naturally in my opinion. You can role play sub I suppose but I really think being sub is all about zoning out and following the Doms commands. That's hard to do if you don't naturally get into a sub zone.
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"It's not only ladies who are submissives you know
And being honest OP, it's as much a state of mind as something you can become. You either have submissive interests and leanings or you don't, also what "being a submissive" will mean to one person, may well differ completely from what it is to the next.
If you're seriously interested in the dynamic OP you could do a lot worse than read books like "SM101" or "Screw The Roses Bring Me The Thorns" both of which are available from Amazon, or any number of decent websites on the subject - in fact my recommendation to anyone contemplating D/s play would be to read, read and read some more before even considering playing, and then communicate, communicate, communicate with anyone that you're considering playing with.
Of course it depends how seriously you want to get into it, and to what level - there's a huge difference between occasionally allowing yourself to be handcuffed and entering into a full blown D/s dynamic "
So much this |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
I used to have a guy I met for a Dom meet, and I would say he was a true Dom, he never did anything to another person he never tried on himself first!
Ours was rope, paddles and floggers relationship, plus wax play etc, we never did any humiliation as that wasn't for either of us. I can honestly say he knew my mind more than I did during that time.
For me it was all because I wanted to loose control in the bedroom and have someone take charge, it was great while it lasted the 3 years it did |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The beauty of it is you can define the roll as you want. Your best up reading about it, there's a certain other site that has loads of stuff to read. You'll see if it interests you.
"
I find that documentary on it ‘50 shades’ very insightful and imformative. |
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All doms are different as with everything of a sexual nature. If you’re interested in going down that route you need to find the right one for you. I’ve messaged a few and they ranged from the ‘50 shades’ variety to a ‘life dom’. It’s a very interesting dynamic and not at all what I thought generally. It can actually be quite beautiful |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
On a more serious note, OP, get yourself to a few local munches or maybe attend a club night with those themes. Just beware of the dim doms and remember it's actually the sub that has the true power x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On a more serious note, OP, get yourself to a few local munches or maybe attend a club night with those themes. Just beware of the dim doms and remember it's actually the sub that has the true power x"
IE the final say. As a sub you lend control to your Dom up until you want it back. If he tells you to do something but you don't want to, use a safe word. Some people choose the traffic light colours - red =stop immediately, amber= pause (and discuss), green is obviously continue. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In a nutshell?"
OP, whoever read your profile and decided you don't have sub tendencies obviously doesn't know that profiles don't always reveal all facets of who we are |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
You're his bitch, you do what you're told when he tells you. He knows what he's doing as your dom because he's read the trilogy and seen the films of fifty shades of shit.
Job done. You're welcome xx "
See, this is the lovely nice mswood that I get, somewhat different to what everyone else gets. 1 of 9. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The exact opposite of the type of person you are, I'd say.
I know, that's what I was thinking if I'm honest. Speaking to a guy today who is into D/s stuff and wants me to be the sub. Some of the stuff he's saying and the way I'm being addressed isn't what I'm used to, but I'm happy to learn. "
doesn’t really correlate with anything you’ve ever posted on here. Don’t you think that kind of relationship dynamic would fuck with your head? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The exact opposite of the type of person you are, I'd say.
I know, that's what I was thinking if I'm honest. Speaking to a guy today who is into D/s stuff and wants me to be the sub. Some of the stuff he's saying and the way I'm being addressed isn't what I'm used to, but I'm happy to learn.
doesn’t really correlate with anything you’ve ever posted on here. Don’t you think that kind of relationship dynamic would fuck with your head? "
I'm not sure because I don't know exactly what it means.
I don't like being called derogatory names for a start. Can see me fighting with this dude. |
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"The exact opposite of the type of person you are, I'd say.
I know, that's what I was thinking if I'm honest. Speaking to a guy today who is into D/s stuff and wants me to be the sub. Some of the stuff he's saying and the way I'm being addressed isn't what I'm used to, but I'm happy to learn.
doesn’t really correlate with anything you’ve ever posted on here. Don’t you think that kind of relationship dynamic would fuck with your head?
I'm not sure because I don't know exactly what it means.
I don't like being called derogatory names for a start. Can see me fighting with this dude. "
I'm in a dominant role normally ,but I do have a sub side I'd like to explore. I too really don't like the humiliation, name calling type of dominant, But they are not the only way. The type that dominate with there presence rather than force , and encourage you to give the gift of submission are out there.
Hopefully |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The exact opposite of the type of person you are, I'd say.
I know, that's what I was thinking if I'm honest. Speaking to a guy today who is into D/s stuff and wants me to be the sub. Some of the stuff he's saying and the way I'm being addressed isn't what I'm used to, but I'm happy to learn.
doesn’t really correlate with anything you’ve ever posted on here. Don’t you think that kind of relationship dynamic would fuck with your head?
I'm not sure because I don't know exactly what it means.
I don't like being called derogatory names for a start. Can see me fighting with this dude. "
You can choose what name he calls you. Pick something you like. I recently delved into the D/s thing and found it incredibly hot. Remember, you have the power and you both decide on what power he has. Start small, see how you get on. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"The exact opposite of the type of person you are, I'd say.
I know, that's what I was thinking if I'm honest. Speaking to a guy today who is into D/s stuff and wants me to be the sub. Some of the stuff he's saying and the way I'm being addressed isn't what I'm used to, but I'm happy to learn.
doesn’t really correlate with anything you’ve ever posted on here. Don’t you think that kind of relationship dynamic would fuck with your head?
I'm not sure because I don't know exactly what it means.
I don't like being called derogatory names for a start. Can see me fighting with this dude. "
That's the thing though - as I suggested in my earlier post, there is no single definition of what a "sub" is - in fact the *only* true definition is the one agreed between two or more people entering into a D/s dynamic, there is no catch all beyond a very high level control/controller one and even that is open to interpretation/question on an individual basis.
For what it's worth, I'd agree with Roxi in that you've never struck me as the submissive type with anything you've ever posted on here - in fact quite the opposite!! |
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So I’m a little inclined to disagree with others who say you are not sub material or that you don’t tend to post anything that would give away any sub tendencies, I have read your post’s in the past and thought that you do give off an air of playing a sub role.
I have seen you post that you like to wash your guys, you’ve posted that you would run them a bath and then wash them all over, I’m sure I’ve read that you would dry them, and possibly shave them, ( I’m going on memory) then cook for them before then sexually satisfying them, now some may see this as a controlling roll but I see this as possibly a sub role too if you were wanting to switch just a thought, Mrs blue eyes |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'll suggest what I always do. Read around the subject, not fiction. That enables you to form your own definition of what being a sub means."
Yep, there are some great articles online, which are written by men and women who are experienced in the subject. |
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"So I’m a little inclined to disagree with others who say you are not sub material or that you don’t tend to post anything that would give away any sub tendencies, I have read your post’s in the past and thought that you do give off an air of playing a sub role.
I have seen you post that you like to wash your guys, you’ve posted that you would run them a bath and then wash them all over, I’m sure I’ve read that you would dry them, and possibly shave them, ( I’m going on memory) then cook for them before then sexually satisfying them, now some may see this as a controlling roll but I see this as possibly a sub role too if you were wanting to switch just a thought, Mrs blue eyes "
Good point. |
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"The exact opposite of the type of person you are, I'd say.
I know, that's what I was thinking if I'm honest. Speaking to a guy today who is into D/s stuff and wants me to be the sub. Some of the stuff he's saying and the way I'm being addressed isn't what I'm used to, but I'm happy to learn. "
Personally I'd ask if he's had any experience with subs previously, don't be afraid to ask questions.
If you don't like the name calling then set that as one of your limits.
If he's serious then he will be considerate of this.
A dominant above all should be a gentleman.
If there is none of this than I guess well it's completely your choice, perhaps just go for the roleplay of D/s instead.
Ss |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"
You're his bitch, you do what you're told when he tells you. He knows what he's doing as your dom because he's read the trilogy and seen the films of fifty shades of shit.
Job done. You're welcome xx
See, this is the lovely nice mswood that I get, somewhat different to what everyone else gets. 1 of 9. "
That was very much meant as a joke, I did post a serious answer as well. I feel honoured to have the number 1 spot! Good luck with your quest for a dom OP and stay safe x |
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