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Banned from Pride

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By *hoenixAdAstra OP   Woman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

I'm trying to get my head round this.

This year my town is hosting its first Pride festival.

My GBF who runs several local businesses, has been told by the organisers, he's not allowed to take part!

We've attended planning meetings, he's given great advice.

His businesses actively support the local LGBT community, we have a float in the annual carnival put on by the Rotary Club every year, he organises numerous charity events throughout the year in aid of local charities, a hospice, homeless shelter etc.

The organisers have told him they are trying to make it a family fun day out to educate about love, tolerance & acceptance, and that some people may be offended by his line of work... One of his business is an adult boutique that yes, sells sex toys.

So the Rotary Club think he's brilliant, always use photos of us in their promotional social media posts, won the best dressed award several times, we've been on the front cover of the local papers for the last 5yrs, but Pride don't want him..?

FTR, we've never had sex toys on display at the carnival!

Yep, I'm confused!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm trying to get my head round this.

This year my town is hosting its first Pride festival.

My GBF who runs several local businesses, has been told by the organisers, he's not allowed to take part!

We've attended planning meetings, he's given great advice.

His businesses actively support the local LGBT community, we have a float in the annual carnival put on by the Rotary Club every year, he organises numerous charity events throughout the year in aid of local charities, a hospice, homeless shelter etc.

The organisers have told him they are trying to make it a family fun day out to educate about love, tolerance & acceptance, and that some people may be offended by his line of work... One of his business is an adult boutique that yes, sells sex toys.

So the Rotary Club think he's brilliant, always use photos of us in their promotional social media posts, won the best dressed award several times, we've been on the front cover of the local papers for the last 5yrs, but Pride don't want him..?

FTR, we've never had sex toys on display at the carnival!

Yep, I'm confused!

"

The organisers want it to be about tolerance yet they are concerned about some people being offended by the involvement or presence of a particular person???

You are not the only one who is confused.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Thats mad.. If it was me I'd ask for a reason in writing and explain that your sure the local press will be interested in hearing about it !

Even if it doesn't make a difference it will ruffle some feathers.. Double standards indeed...

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By *aenMan  over a year ago

Here and There

Sounds like the Rotary club are just virtue signalling and don’t truly buy the core message. Hence the mixed messages around inclusion.

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By *hoenixAdAstra OP   Woman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"Sounds like the Rotary club are just virtue signalling and don’t truly buy the core message. Hence the mixed messages around inclusion."

The Pride event is nothing to do with the Rotary Club.

That's being organised by an independent group of people.

My point was, the RC which tends to have a 'fuddy duddy' image openly welcome our attendance, while a festival to promote LGBT community won't

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Sounds like the Rotary club are just virtue signalling and don’t truly buy the core message. Hence the mixed messages around inclusion.

The Pride event is nothing to do with the Rotary Club.

That's being organised by an independent group of people.

My point was, the RC which tends to have a 'fuddy duddy' image openly welcome our attendance, while a festival to promote LGBT community won't "

Would they change their minds if it got out somehow that they are actively discriminating against something thats meant to include everyone? You know how bad press can turn things around pretty quickly..

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By *hoenixAdAstra OP   Woman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"

The organisers want it to be about tolerance yet they are concerned about some people being offended by the involvement or presence of a particular person???

You are not the only one who is confused."

The original reason they gave was, "they had concerns over what would be on display, as they're aiming it as a family fun day, having objects of a sexual nature display would not be suitable for young children"

There's never been anything like that on display at any other events previously & the chairman of the RC also wrote a letter to confirm this.

Thry have now changed their reasoning to "we are only accepting local community groups & charities into the event area, not businesses out to make money"

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By *hoenixAdAstra OP   Woman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"Thats mad.. If it was me I'd ask for a reason in writing and explain that your sure the local press will be interested in hearing about it !

Even if it doesn't make a difference it will ruffle some feathers.. Double standards indeed... "

It's already all over the local Facebook pages, and raising some heated comments.

I know a journalist is going to see my friend this week too!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Thats mad.. If it was me I'd ask for a reason in writing and explain that your sure the local press will be interested in hearing about it !

Even if it doesn't make a difference it will ruffle some feathers.. Double standards indeed...

It's already all over the local Facebook pages, and raising some heated comments.

I know a journalist is going to see my friend this week too! "

This is Brighton pride we are talking about right??

A boisterous and ostentatious (that's a good thing)event to say the least.

And they are claiming to be worried about the tastefulness of including certain business people? Maybe they should take a walk around their own city someday,with their eyes open.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Thats mad.. If it was me I'd ask for a reason in writing and explain that your sure the local press will be interested in hearing about it !

Even if it doesn't make a difference it will ruffle some feathers.. Double standards indeed...

It's already all over the local Facebook pages, and raising some heated comments.

I know a journalist is going to see my friend this week too!

This is Brighton pride we are talking about right??

A boisterous and ostentatious (that's a good thing)event to say the least.

And they are claiming to be worried about the tastefulness of including certain business people? Maybe they should take a walk around their own city someday,with their eyes open."

She said it's the first pride being run there, so it won't be Brighton.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Thats mad.. If it was me I'd ask for a reason in writing and explain that your sure the local press will be interested in hearing about it !

Even if it doesn't make a difference it will ruffle some feathers.. Double standards indeed...

It's already all over the local Facebook pages, and raising some heated comments.

I know a journalist is going to see my friend this week too! "

I’d be furious at that level of hypocrisy, I’d also be careful though not to make what should be an inclusive and open event about one person or issue. The last thing I’d want is to undermine the positive message of the event by pointing fingers beforehand.

Businesses not making money off the back of pride events? Every pride event is a huge money spinner, just look at major corporations and businesses connecting with pride now. If they’re concerned about sex toys being on display then that’s a separate issue and can be addressed. To cut someone out wholesale smacks of exactly the attitude that pride is meant to counter and challenge.

If they want to teach children about the core values of pride then the organisers should perhaps take a leaf out of their own book!

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By *ara JTV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol East

Pride is about celebrating the freedom to be oneself and the end of state persecution. It sounds like the organisers have drifted into organising something else.

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By *ust PeachyWoman  over a year ago

Prestonish


"Thats mad.. If it was me I'd ask for a reason in writing and explain that your sure the local press will be interested in hearing about it !

Even if it doesn't make a difference it will ruffle some feathers.. Double standards indeed...

It's already all over the local Facebook pages, and raising some heated comments.

I know a journalist is going to see my friend this week too!

I’d be furious at that level of hypocrisy, I’d also be careful though not to make what should be an inclusive and open event about one person or issue. The last thing I’d want is to undermine the positive message of the event by pointing fingers beforehand.

Businesses not making money off the back of pride events? Every pride event is a huge money spinner, just look at major corporations and businesses connecting with pride now. If they’re concerned about sex toys being on display then that’s a separate issue and can be addressed. To cut someone out wholesale smacks of exactly the attitude that pride is meant to counter and challenge.

If they want to teach children about the core values of pride then the organisers should perhaps take a leaf out of their own book! "

This absolutely!

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By *eedsandyMan  over a year ago

Leeds

Clearly there is something missing from this story.

The OP says that the organisers want to create a family friendly event.

The OP then says that one of the businesses that the banned person operates, sells sex toys.

Is the person being banned, just because they sell sex toys, in which case the decision is bizarre; or

Is the person being banned from having a sex toy themed float, or a float that advertises sex toys, in which case, the ban is understandable, as such a float/advertising is not family friendly.

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By *hoenixAdAstra OP   Woman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"Thats mad.. If it was me I'd ask for a reason in writing and explain that your sure the local press will be interested in hearing about it !

Even if it doesn't make a difference it will ruffle some feathers.. Double standards indeed...

It's already all over the local Facebook pages, and raising some heated comments.

I know a journalist is going to see my friend this week too!

This is Brighton pride we are talking about right??

A boisterous and ostentatious (that's a good thing)event to say the least.

And they are claiming to be worried about the tastefulness of including certain business people? Maybe they should take a walk around their own city someday,with their eyes open.

She said it's the first pride being run there, so it won't be Brighton. "

It's not Brighton but close

His shop window is currently bedecked in pride colours.

This is what she (head organiser) wrote on his photo of it on his Facebook page

“It's great to see you in the spirit love the window ., and still stand by my decision though for our pride event .. Maybe try Brighton”

We do attend Brighton, but not our own town!

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By *hoenixAdAstra OP   Woman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"Clearly there is something missing from this story.

The OP says that the organisers want to create a family friendly event.

The OP then says that one of the businesses that the banned person operates, sells sex toys.

Is the person being banned, just because they sell sex toys, in which case the decision is bizarre; or

Is the person being banned from having a sex toy themed float, or a float that advertises sex toys, in which case, the ban is understandable, as such a float/advertising is not family friendly.

"

There would be no toys on sale, or anything of that nature on display. There never has been.

He runs several businesses, so he doesn't even have to be under the name of his boutique.

Previous local carnivals have all had themes, we dress in appropriate costumes, we sing & dance our way through the streets, we give out goody bags, thst include freebies & flyers/leaflets from every business/charity etc taking part, nothing sexual has ever been in those bags.

I spend several weeks packing them, everything is double checked for content

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

That’s a shame...

Sounds very hypocritical of the organisers !

Thought these events were all about acceptance

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By *rightonsteveMan  over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Very strange. Especially when I copy this quote from the organisers web page “....we will be

encouraging local businesses to get directly involved too with

window displays and other initiatives....”

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By *oodnitegirlWoman  over a year ago

Yorkshire

If you don’t turn up in blow up cock and vagina suits I’m falling out with you! Haha

Joking aside. Ita a joke that they are alienating the one person that they are supposed to be ‘celebratory’ of. Get to the press... xx

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By *hoenixAdAstra OP   Woman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"Tl

I’d be furious at that level of hypocrisy, I’d also be careful though not to make what should be an inclusive and open event about one person or issue. The last thing I’d want is to undermine the positive message of the event by pointing fingers beforehand.

"

That is exactly his dilemma.

After being given a reason for not being allowed to take part, he proved those reasons wrong, they then gave another reason.

The last thing he wants is too overshadow what should be a brilliant & beautiful day but a huge amount of the local LGBT community, his friends are not happy, and wanting explanations.

It'll be odd to have a Pride event where the majority of local gay folk won't attend!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Is it affiliated to the other Pride events and run by them?

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By *hoenixAdAstra OP   Woman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"Very strange. Especially when I copy this quote from the organisers web page “....we will be

encouraging local businesses to get directly involved too with

window displays and other initiatives....”"

Precisely!

Hello Neighbour

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By *hoenixAdAstra OP   Woman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"If you don’t turn up in blow up cock and vagina suits I’m falling out with you! Haha

Joking aside. Ita a joke that they are alienating the one person that they are supposed to be ‘celebratory’ of. Get to the press... xx"

Don't tempt me... I'd do it, just to see the look on their faces!

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By *hoenixAdAstra OP   Woman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"Is it affiliated to the other Pride events and run by them? "

It's been set up by an independent group of women, but obviously with the consent of the Pride team

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By *rightonsteveMan  over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"Very strange. Especially when I copy this quote from the organisers web page “....we will be

encouraging local businesses to get directly involved too with

window displays and other initiatives....”

Precisely!

Hello Neighbour "

hello starry lady

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Is it affiliated to the other Pride events and run by them?

It's been set up by an independent group of women, but obviously with the consent of the Pride team "

Maybe contact Pride and tell them? It's not good press for them and they may feel it's not on.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Well he does take drugs but he won't on the day ...see what I'm saying ,

I guess it's all about image as it's a family event . Can't really have a sex toy/adult shop promoting a family day .

Hes already using the day to (sneakily) promote his business by putting his dressed shop window on Facebook. .

He has plenty of businesses ..he shoulda kept the sex shop discrete and used one of his other businesses.

If I'm reading right here and it's a family day family event carnival type affair where mum's and dads bring there young children and families etc etc the sex shop would be offensive and not right for kids.

Put of respect I would have covered over my adult shop window with a blind or sheet or window paint and used another business for the event ..

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By *hoenixAdAstra OP   Woman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"Well he does take drugs but he won't on the day ...see what I'm saying ,

I guess it's all about image as it's a family event . Can't really have a sex toy/adult shop promoting a family day .

Hes already using the day to (sneakily) promote his business by putting his dressed shop window on Facebook. .

He has plenty of businesses ..he shoulda kept the sex shop discrete and used one of his other businesses.

If I'm reading right here and it's a family day family event carnival type affair where mum's and dads bring there young children and families etc etc the sex shop would be offensive and not right for kids.

Put of respect I would have covered over my adult shop window with a blind or sheet or window paint and used another business for the event .."

Urmmmmm I've already stated that he would NOT be promoting his boutique, but under another name.

There would be nothing of a sexual nature on display.

There never has been, never will be at any event we attend where there are families, children etc.

He's got a bit more respect for people than to go round shoving butt plugs in people's faces.

As for the shop window.

July is Gay Pride month... He's always done a display for it, for years. It has nothing to do with there being an event on this year.

Why should he not do sonething he's always done?

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By *dam1971Man  over a year ago

Bedford

I find it very strange that on days like this there’s often a military parade (I have nothing against our armed forces) and their job is really there to kill people. If this is fine to parade then people who are there to encourage acceptance and tolerance should have it much easier

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I know that some Rotary Clubs can be quite intolerant, so it doesn’t surprise me. That’s really frustrating news thouch, for you both. I’d kick up a fuss.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

OMG! Gays being hypocritically intolerant who'd a thought it

Sorry but experience suggests that being gay is no bar to being intolerant

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"OMG! Gays being hypocritically intolerant who'd a thought it

Sorry but experience suggests that being gay is no bar to being intolerant"

Have you actually read the thread?

It’s not ‘gays’ being hypocritical it’s a local committee putting on a pride event.

Whilst being gay is no barrier to hypocrisy or to intolerance it’s nice to know where your thoughts ran to

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By *hoenixAdAstra OP   Woman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"I know that some Rotary Clubs can be quite intolerant, so it doesn’t surprise me. That’s really frustrating news thouch, for you both. I’d kick up a fuss. "

It's nothing to do with the RC as I've already stated.

The RC welcome us, actually invite us to all the events they put on.

This is a Pride event being organised by an independent group of people

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By *hips n FursMan  over a year ago

Huddersfield

...how many times does the OP have to keep repeating herself.

Give her a break and read the thread.

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By *hoenixAdAstra OP   Woman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"...how many times does the OP have to keep repeating herself.

Give her a break and read the thread."

Thank you!

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By *rightonsteveMan  over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

It’s like that whisper game .....

This is Rumour Control. These are the facts: a committee of gays have attacked the business man on gay pride day for having a sex toy float with a giant inflatable dildo balloon on it.

Or.....as the guy says....read the thread.

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By *ara JTV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol East

Pride is all about freedom of sexual expression.

All sorts of kinks, fetishes and everything else on show.

People feeling free to express themselves.

That's the way it should be.

It's fabulous.

Of course, it should be open to all of any age. No-one should feel they cannot be part of it.

But if you are going to exclude people because it is something orientated towards children, then it is not a Pride you are organising - it's a children's event.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"...how many times does the OP have to keep repeating herself.

Give her a break and read the thread."

Blimey, I read it wrong, that’s all.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"OMG! Gays being hypocritically intolerant who'd a thought it

Sorry but experience suggests that being gay is no bar to being intolerant

Have you actually read the thread?

It’s not ‘gays’ being hypocritical it’s a local committee putting on a pride event.

Whilst being gay is no barrier to hypocrisy or to intolerance it’s nice to know where your thoughts ran to "

What that a pride event might be organised primarily by members of the LGBTQ community? Shocking assumption. Though a bit of digging seems to suggest a cosy relationship between the organisers and the companies providing facilities for the main events.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"OMG! Gays being hypocritically intolerant who'd a thought it

Sorry but experience suggests that being gay is no bar to being intolerant

Have you actually read the thread?

It’s not ‘gays’ being hypocritical it’s a local committee putting on a pride event.

Whilst being gay is no barrier to hypocrisy or to intolerance it’s nice to know where your thoughts ran to

What that a pride event might be organised primarily by members of the LGBTQ community? Shocking assumption. Though a bit of digging seems to suggest a cosy relationship between the organisers and the companies providing facilities for the main events."

That’s not what I was saying whatsoever

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By *hoenixAdAstra OP   Woman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"It’s like that whisper game .....

This is Rumour Control. These are the facts: a committee of gays have attacked the business man on gay pride day for having a sex toy float with a giant inflatable dildo balloon on it.

Or.....as the guy says....read the thread. "

Oh Thanks Steve... Made me chuckle after a long evening at work x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Thats mad.. If it was me I'd ask for a reason in writing and explain that your sure the local press will be interested in hearing about it !

Even if it doesn't make a difference it will ruffle some feathers.. Double standards indeed... "

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By *rightonsteveMan  over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"It’s like that whisper game .....

This is Rumour Control. These are the facts: a committee of gays have attacked the business man on gay pride day for having a sex toy float with a giant inflatable dildo balloon on it.

Or.....as the guy says....read the thread.

Oh Thanks Steve... Made me chuckle after a long evening at work x"

Oh, I’m good at that. A mere hint of hipsters removal and the ladies are chortling with glee. That’s what I imagine anyway .

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I remember Pride in London being cancelled in 1995 because of a T.

The local Prides are a bit of a law unto themselves. The reality is that they are cutting off their nose, in this case. If they want to keep it going in subsequent years they are going to need local businesses to support it. Other local businesses might wonder if they will be out of favour in future years if the organiser doesn't like them, for whatever reason.

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By *adyGardenWoman  over a year ago

LONDON (se)

Pride isnt meant to be a family event and I e never been to a pride where I would want to bring my children. Pride is about sexual liberation, and freedom of sexual choice and freedom to be who you are and to love freely. Children are too young, in my opinion, to be exposed to such sexual liberation. Yes educate them about it but don't call what essentially is NOT a pride even a pride event. It should be a family fun day of learning about individuality and freedom to love who you choose and not associated with pride at all. I'm all for a family fun day like that but pride is full of half naked people expressing their sexual selves and dressing how they would like to daily but can't. Event organisers shouldn't be making it about something it isn't just to jump on a band wagon and pretend to be inclusive when they are not

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