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Can men and women be just friends or...,
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I have a few female friends from here who I see often and we just enjoy eachothers company as friends  "
But is there always a part of your brain thinking play the long game Cakey boy, you’re on a winner here son ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My best friend from university is female, there was nothing sexual at all between us. We would share a bed quite frequently, even get changed and be naked in front of each other on several occasions. It was actually a very liberating relationship |
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"My best friend from university is female, there was nothing sexual at all between us. We would share a bed quite frequently, even get changed and be naked in front of each other on several occasions. It was actually a very liberating relationship "
She was obviously a lesbian |
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I think everyone is different on this one .
Mainly people will say yes , of course and give examples . But how many will say they have had platonic relationships which went tits up ? One drink too many , one slushy film watched together and it went one stop too far , one evening where when feeling low a look , a smile , a hug , and it went further .
I guess I just old fashioned but all my mates are men , and I only spend time with my wife for female company . I have coffee with other women , but close friendship with the opposite sex is reserved for my wife . Would I be tempted ? Not in a million years , but I can’t speak for the woman who may be in my company who may misread signals . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My best friend from university is female, there was nothing sexual at all between us. We would share a bed quite frequently, even get changed and be naked in front of each other on several occasions. It was actually a very liberating relationship
She was obviously a lesbian "
Hahaha! Nope, at the time we both identified as straight, she still does |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My best friend of 30 years is a bloke and we still go on holiday together but no sex! Have more platonic friendships than same gender friendships but I'm a bit of an adrenaline junkie with a very male dominated job and the same with hobbies |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think everyone is different on this one .
Mainly people will say yes , of course and give examples . But how many will say they have had platonic relationships which went tits up ? One drink too many , one slushy film watched together and it went one stop too far , one evening where when feeling low a look , a smile , a hug , and it went further . "
I think this happens more often than most people would like to admit.
Maybe seven or eight years ago my parents lodger who is a few years older than me and I'm friends with made out with me in a nightclub, so I told her that night I actually liked her and I can't remember what she said but it never progressed any further than that kiss. I found out afterwards that a few of my mates persuaded her to do it to cheer me up because I was in a mood over something. I always thought that was pretty fucking cruel on their part. |
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"I have female frends i dont fuck"
Most of my friends just say Fuck You! 
I'm so glad I've got an occasional fb, but over the years I have known and still do, plenty of very sexy ladies with whom I still keep a platonic relationship. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think everyone is different on this one .
Mainly people will say yes , of course and give examples . But how many will say they have had platonic relationships which went tits up ? One drink too many , one slushy film watched together and it went one stop too far , one evening where when feeling low a look , a smile , a hug , and it went further .
I think this happens more often than most people would like to admit.
Maybe seven or eight years ago my parents lodger who is a few years older than me and I'm friends with made out with me in a nightclub, so I told her that night I actually liked her and I can't remember what she said but it never progressed any further than that kiss. I found out afterwards that a few of my mates persuaded her to do it to cheer me up because I was in a mood over something. I always thought that was pretty fucking cruel on their part. "
I see why you'd think it was cruel but on some level it was a nice thing for them to do. They cared about you enough to want to cheer you up. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think everyone is different on this one .
Mainly people will say yes , of course and give examples . But how many will say they have had platonic relationships which went tits up ? One drink too many , one slushy film watched together and it went one stop too far , one evening where when feeling low a look , a smile , a hug , and it went further .
I think this happens more often than most people would like to admit.
Maybe seven or eight years ago my parents lodger who is a few years older than me and I'm friends with made out with me in a nightclub, so I told her that night I actually liked her and I can't remember what she said but it never progressed any further than that kiss. I found out afterwards that a few of my mates persuaded her to do it to cheer me up because I was in a mood over something. I always thought that was pretty fucking cruel on their part.
I see why you'd think it was cruel but on some level it was a nice thing for them to do. They cared about you enough to want to cheer you up. "
My mates aren't like that. If there's humour to be found at my expense they'll find it. I think they did it for a laugh, knowing full well I liked her and would get shot down if I said anything to her. I don't even know why I put up with their shit most of the time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My best friend from university is female, there was nothing sexual at all between us. We would share a bed quite frequently, even get changed and be naked in front of each other on several occasions. It was actually a very liberating relationship "
I wonder if she had feelings for you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it's like anything else. People are people, there's either a connection in that way or there's not.
I have male friends I have no attraction to.
As a bi lady no-one ever questions if I can be just friends with females. I can. They're my friends same as guys are. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have lots of male friends. Nothing sexual at all!
MrsH
Maybe from your side, what about there’s ?"
Well the fact I feel nothing sexual indicates even if they did, it wouldn’t happen...
We’re just mates. I’m a bit of an idiot and not very ladylike so I fit in well  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm friends with lots of women I don't fancy. The ones I fancy, it is a struggle..."
Why is it a struggle with the ones you fancy? In case you let slip you fancy them? |
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"Of course they can. Both have to be on the same page though.
To the people who say No, does that mean that bi people can't have any friends?
~Mia"
There aren't that many truly bi people . Most wouldn't actually consider a relationship with same sex. Bi playful is more the norm on here I would say . |
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"I'm friends with lots of women I don't fancy. The ones I fancy, it is a struggle...
Why is it a struggle with the ones you fancy? In case you let slip you fancy them?"
You know that I fancy you, and have done for several years  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm friends with lots of women I don't fancy. The ones I fancy, it is a struggle...
Why is it a struggle with the ones you fancy? In case you let slip you fancy them?
You know that I fancy you, and have done for several years "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've got quite a few female friends who will always be just friends. All but one of them I've known since my early teens and I see as family so it would be weird to do any else with them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm friends with lots of women I don't fancy. The ones I fancy, it is a struggle...
Why is it a struggle with the ones you fancy? In case you let slip you fancy them?"
If I fancy them, it is a distraction. Totally down to me, but I have to make a conscious effort to avoid flirting.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm friends with lots of women I don't fancy. The ones I fancy, it is a struggle...
Why is it a struggle with the ones you fancy? In case you let slip you fancy them?
If I fancy them, it is a distraction. Totally down to me, but I have to make a conscious effort to avoid flirting.."
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think everyone is different on this one .
Mainly people will say yes , of course and give examples . But how many will say they have had platonic relationships which went tits up ? One drink too many , one slushy film watched together and it went one stop too far , one evening where when feeling low a look , a smile , a hug , and it went further .
I guess I just old fashioned but all my mates are men , and I only spend time with my wife for female company . I have coffee with other women , but close friendship with the opposite sex is reserved for my wife . Would I be tempted ? Not in a million years , but I can’t speak for the woman who may be in my company who may misread signals . "
Totally agree with you (female here). It has been my experience that male "friends" will always make a sexual approach. Lee is my best friend and I don't pursue or encourage friendship with other men. |
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"I'm friends with lots of women I don't fancy. The ones I fancy, it is a struggle...
Why is it a struggle with the ones you fancy? In case you let slip you fancy them?
You know that I fancy you, and have done for several years
"
Don't put that embarrassed face up to me young lady, you know what could happen Missus  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have a few female friends from here who I see often and we just enjoy eachothers company as friends
But is there always a part of your brain thinking play the long game Cakey boy, you’re on a winner here son ?"
No not really to be honest were such good friends I think sex woukd ruin an great friendship |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"....will sex always get in the way ?"
They can be friends but i think one side would always want more even if they never show it. Like another poster said im also just old fashioned |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I believe that male/female 'friends' have some kind of sexual attraction. It may well be unrequited, unacknowledged, but it is there. "
Yeah, I’ve got a good female friend, most of the time it’s cool, but every now and again it pops up. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Of course they can. Both have to be on the same page though.
To the people who say No, does that mean that bi people can't have any friends?
~Mia
There aren't that many truly bi people . Most wouldn't actually consider a relationship with same sex. Bi playful is more the norm on here I would say ."
That is true indeed. I'm bi and have dated women. So am I not allowed any friends according to the naysayers?
~Mia |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Of course they can. Both have to be on the same page though.
To the people who say No, does that mean that bi people can't have any friends?
~Mia
There aren't that many truly bi people . Most wouldn't actually consider a relationship with same sex. Bi playful is more the norm on here I would say .
That is true indeed. I'm bi and have dated women. So am I not allowed any friends according to the naysayers?
~Mia"
The question was about men and women, not bi women. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes it's possible.
I work around all men. Nothing goes on and nor do I want it too.
One of the lads and his wife invited me to their wedding. Beautiful day it was too. I was also one of the first people he told when he was about to become a dad for the first time.
I also helped him and the other young lads on what to buy their partners for valentines day. They seriously had no clue otherwise lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"....will sex always get in the way ?"
Men and women can easily remain friends, I have many female friends however If something physical has happened that will certainty make things harder. Especially if one starts ignoring the other |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I believe that male/female 'friends' have some kind of sexual attraction. It may well be unrequited, unacknowledged, but it is there.
Spot on  "
My male friends are ex lovers, one night stand to a few months fling but didn’t work out. We are now close friends and I couldn’t think of anything worse than thinking of them in a sexual way. They feel the same. I recently went to one guys wedding. I have 3 close male friends and one female one. I prefer male company but in a platonic way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Of course they can. Both have to be on the same page though.
To the people who say No, does that mean that bi people can't have any friends?
~Mia
There aren't that many truly bi people . Most wouldn't actually consider a relationship with same sex. Bi playful is more the norm on here I would say .
That is true indeed. I'm bi and have dated women. So am I not allowed any friends according to the naysayers?
~Mia
The question was about men and women, not bi women."
That doesn't matter. A lot of people say men and women can't be friends because someone will get feelings. So are bi people not supposed to have any friends?
I already answered the initial question and am now asking an additional question.
~Mia |
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IMHO, yes they can just be friends however, the man will always wonder what the woman looks like naked, how she fucks and if she sucks...... just saying but I defy any man to tell me otherwise.
Women, if you have a male best friend, trust me he constantly considers these points. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"IMHO, yes they can just be friends however, the man will always wonder what the woman looks like naked, how she fucks and if she sucks...... just saying but I defy any man to tell me otherwise.
Women, if you have a male best friend, trust me he constantly considers these points. "
Yep cause all men are the same
I just love sweeping generalisations.
Not 
I can tell you now there are plenty of men who don't think about their female friends in that way for a whole variety of reasons. Just like not all women wonder how every man fucks.
~Mia |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"IMHO, yes they can just be friends however, the man will always wonder what the woman looks like naked, how she fucks and if she sucks...... just saying but I defy any man to tell me otherwise.
Women, if you have a male best friend, trust me he constantly considers these points.
Yep cause all men are the same
I just love sweeping generalisations.
Not
I can tell you now there are plenty of men who don't think about their female friends in that way for a whole variety of reasons. Just like not all women wonder how every man fucks.
~Mia"
You know what men are thinking? Remarkable |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"IMHO, yes they can just be friends however, the man will always wonder what the woman looks like naked, how she fucks and if she sucks...... just saying but I defy any man to tell me otherwise.
Women, if you have a male best friend, trust me he constantly considers these points.
Yep cause all men are the same
I just love sweeping generalisations.
Not
I can tell you now there are plenty of men who don't think about their female friends in that way for a whole variety of reasons. Just like not all women wonder how every man fucks.
~Mia
You know what men are thinking? Remarkable"
No but I can tell you now that not all men think the same way as you.... Not hard to come to that conclusion.
~Mia |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"IMHO, yes they can just be friends however, the man will always wonder what the woman looks like naked, how she fucks and if she sucks...... just saying but I defy any man to tell me otherwise.
Women, if you have a male best friend, trust me he constantly considers these points.
Yep cause all men are the same
I just love sweeping generalisations.
Not
I can tell you now there are plenty of men who don't think about their female friends in that way for a whole variety of reasons. Just like not all women wonder how every man fucks.
~Mia
You know what men are thinking? Remarkable
No but I can tell you now that not all men think the same way as you.... Not hard to come to that conclusion.
~Mia"
I'm not a man. And you have no idea what goes on in people's heads. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"IMHO, yes they can just be friends however, the man will always wonder what the woman looks like naked, how she fucks and if she sucks...... just saying but I defy any man to tell me otherwise.
Women, if you have a male best friend, trust me he constantly considers these points.
Yep cause all men are the same
I just love sweeping generalisations.
Not
I can tell you now there are plenty of men who don't think about their female friends in that way for a whole variety of reasons. Just like not all women wonder how every man fucks.
~Mia
You know what men are thinking? Remarkable
No but I can tell you now that not all men think the same way as you.... Not hard to come to that conclusion.
~Mia
I'm not a man. And you have no idea what goes on in people's heads."
No but it is safe to say I'm sure there are plenty of men who view their female friends as simply friends as previous comments from men have reflected I am not wrong.
~Mia |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"IMHO, yes they can just be friends however, the man will always wonder what the woman looks like naked, how she fucks and if she sucks...... just saying but I defy any man to tell me otherwise.
Women, if you have a male best friend, trust me he constantly considers these points.
Yep cause all men are the same
I just love sweeping generalisations.
Not
I can tell you now there are plenty of men who don't think about their female friends in that way for a whole variety of reasons. Just like not all women wonder how every man fucks.
~Mia
You know what men are thinking? Remarkable
No but I can tell you now that not all men think the same way as you.... Not hard to come to that conclusion.
~Mia
I'm not a man. And you have no idea what goes on in people's heads.
No but it is safe to say I'm sure there are plenty of men who view their female friends as simply friends as previous comments from men have reflected I am not wrong.
~Mia"
Do you always believe what people tell you about their secret thoughts? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Of course they can but we are, despite our intellectual superiority, still animals with inherent animalistic urges and desires."
Exactly, and we choose whether or not to act on them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"IMHO, yes they can just be friends however, the man will always wonder what the woman looks like naked, how she fucks and if she sucks...... just saying but I defy any man to tell me otherwise.
Women, if you have a male best friend, trust me he constantly considers these points.
Yep cause all men are the same
I just love sweeping generalisations.
Not
I can tell you now there are plenty of men who don't think about their female friends in that way for a whole variety of reasons. Just like not all women wonder how every man fucks.
~Mia
You know what men are thinking? Remarkable
No but I can tell you now that not all men think the same way as you.... Not hard to come to that conclusion.
~Mia
I'm not a man. And you have no idea what goes on in people's heads.
No but it is safe to say I'm sure there are plenty of men who view their female friends as simply friends as previous comments from men have reflected I am not wrong.
~Mia
Do you always believe what people tell you about their secret thoughts?"
Of course not. But I'm also a believer that not all men are the same and not all of them have the same behaviours and thoughts. Anyone with any common sense could figure that out
~Mia |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"IMHO, yes they can just be friends however, the man will always wonder what the woman looks like naked, how she fucks and if she sucks...... just saying but I defy any man to tell me otherwise.
Women, if you have a male best friend, trust me he constantly considers these points. "
That's like saying all gay men think that same thing about all the men they know, also if a woman has a male best friend he probably knows all these things anyway and still thinks of her just as a friend. You have to want to fuck every non related woman you know. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"IMHO, yes they can just be friends however, the man will always wonder what the woman looks like naked, how she fucks and if she sucks...... just saying but I defy any man to tell me otherwise.
Women, if you have a male best friend, trust me he constantly considers these points.
That's like saying all gay men think that same thing about all the men they know, also if a woman has a male best friend he probably knows all these things anyway and still thinks of her just as a friend. You have to want to fuck every non related woman you know. "
It's ok...I believe you when you say we're just friends  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Of course they can but we are, despite our intellectual superiority, still animals with inherent animalistic urges and desires.
Exactly, and we choose whether or not to act on them."
Absolutely but my point is they are there, be it consciously or subconsciously. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes it's possible.
I work around all men. Nothing goes on and nor do I want it too.
One of the lads and his wife invited me to their wedding. Beautiful day it was too. I was also one of the first people he told when he was about to become a dad for the first time.
I also helped him and the other young lads on what to buy their partners for valentines day. They seriously had no clue otherwise lol."
You think none of them ever wank about you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Never understood this ... I work with mainly men, have very male dominated hobbies and my bestie of 30 years is a man. But I don't think of them any differently to my female work colleagues or friends!
I wouldn't want to live without my friends but anyone can actually live without sex (MH issues aside) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"IMHO, yes they can just be friends however, the man will always wonder what the woman looks like naked, how she fucks and if she sucks...... just saying but I defy any man to tell me otherwise.
Women, if you have a male best friend, trust me he constantly considers these points.
That's like saying all gay men think that same thing about all the men they know, also if a woman has a male best friend he probably knows all these things anyway and still thinks of her just as a friend. You have to want to fuck every non related woman you know.
It's ok...I believe you when you say we're just friends "
I do often consider those points made, maybe it time to fill in the blanks |
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"IMHO, yes they can just be friends however, the man will always wonder what the woman looks like naked, how she fucks and if she sucks...... just saying but I defy any man to tell me otherwise.
Women, if you have a male best friend, trust me he constantly considers these points.
Yep cause all men are the same
I just love sweeping generalisations.
Not
I can tell you now there are plenty of men who don't think about their female friends in that way for a whole variety of reasons. Just like not all women wonder how every man fucks.
~Mia"
It’s only my opinion however, I have a lot of male friends and when we’re in certain situations, lads trips skiing, sailing, cycling etc, we have these discussions and not one bloke ever disagrees, we laugh at the fact we also consider each other’s wives.
Again, it’s only my opinion, that of 30 plus pals and as such not a trusted rounded view of the male mind. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"IMHO, yes they can just be friends however, the man will always wonder what the woman looks like naked, how she fucks and if she sucks...... just saying but I defy any man to tell me otherwise.
Women, if you have a male best friend, trust me he constantly considers these points.
Yep cause all men are the same
I just love sweeping generalisations.
Not
I can tell you now there are plenty of men who don't think about their female friends in that way for a whole variety of reasons. Just like not all women wonder how every man fucks.
~Mia
It’s only my opinion however, I have a lot of male friends and when we’re in certain situations, lads trips skiing, sailing, cycling etc, we have these discussions and not one bloke ever disagrees, we laugh at the fact we also consider each other’s wives.
Again, it’s only my opinion, that of 30 plus pals and as such not a trusted rounded view of the male mind. "
So because your experience of men you assume they are all the same?
That's very logical isn't it
Yes women will have male friends that think about those kinda of things just like some women think of their male friends in that way.
But you will also have those people who don't think of their opposite sex friends in that way at all, may it because of their sexuality, their personality or just the fact that not every person finds every other person attractive and also not every person is interested in sex.
So it is a fact based on those things that not every opposite sex friendship involves one or both of them thinking about each other in that way.
~Mia
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feeling and some don’t 