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personal swinger rules
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hmmmm, its kinda playing on my mind so i thought i would ask u lot and see what ya think.
i got a little nagged tonight to meet someone and the reason i wouldn't is because my son is here and i point blank refuse to never ever meet anyone when he's here.
the idea of him hearing anything or even worst, waking up and coming into my room while i'm on all 4's taking some scares the bejesus out of me. so when i got into this, i made certain rules to myself to follow.
a few have been broken along the way, but this one is unbreakable in my eyes. i kinda got the feeling he thought i was just a cock tease with no intention of meeting him and just playing mind games.
am i weird??? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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hell no just stick to your guns. at the end of the day u have ur reasons and u av to stand by them and if the guys cant see that then they aint worth the hassel |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"hmmmm, its kinda playing on my mind so i thought i would ask u lot and see what ya think.
i got a little nagged tonight to meet someone and the reason i wouldn't is because my son is here and i point blank refuse to never ever meet anyone when he's here.
the idea of him hearing anything or even worst, waking up and coming into my room while i'm on all 4's taking some scares the bejesus out of me. so when i got into this, i made certain rules to myself to follow.
a few have been broken along the way, but this one is unbreakable in my eyes. i kinda got the feeling he thought i was just a cock tease with no intention of meeting him and just playing mind games.
am i weird???"
You are a sensible, caring mother who clearly puts her family above her fun times... I would not accommodate for that (and a couple of other) reasons...
Interesting topic this one ... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No I think your being sensible and responsible...........!
As for the meet tonight, follow any instincts you have, when I've not listened to mine it's not turned out so well  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
You do whatever you feel comfortable with and if anyone tries to persuade you otherwise they are only thinking about themselves and have no respect for you at all |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"No I think your being sensible and responsible...........!
As for the meet tonight, follow any instincts you have, when I've not listened to mine it's not turned out so well "
So agree with this comment , too... when I have put my "gut feeling" to one side I ended up regretting it EVERY time... so trust that one ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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U made the absolute right choie hun, i get nattered to meet after my little ones gone to bed and i point blank refuse..its never ever gonna happen and if they dont like it well tough tittys init  |
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"No I think your being sensible and responsible...........!
As for the meet tonight, follow any instincts you have, when I've not listened to mine it's not turned out so well "
exactly right...any pressure put on you when you've explained the situation is emotional blackmail . Stick to your guns in this game, whatever the boundaries are about
xx |
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phew! glad ya said that, was starting to think i was going all mamby pamby as i wave bye bye to me twenties.
well, either that or i just don't wanna pay the therepy bills when he has flash backs of seeing his mum whipping some poor guy's ass while dressed as a hotdog....................
................think i may be the one needing therepy  |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"And lets face it....single fems can have as many rules as they like
sorry just wanted to rub that in a bit "
I wish lol... how do u do it girl... I dont think we do, or do we? It somehow doesnt feel fair onthe boys or am I too soft and soppy in my old age ?  |
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"No I think your being sensible and responsible...........!
As for the meet tonight, follow any instincts you have, when I've not listened to mine it's not turned out so well
exactly right...any pressure put on you when you've explained the situation is emotional blackmail . Stick to your guns in this game, whatever the boundaries are about
xx"
Absolutely.. stick to your rules.
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"hmmmm, its kinda playing on my mind so i thought i would ask u lot and see what ya think.
i got a little nagged tonight to meet someone and the reason i wouldn't is because my son is here and i point blank refuse to never ever meet anyone when he's here.
the idea of him hearing anything or even worst, waking up and coming into my room while i'm on all 4's taking some scares the bejesus out of me. so when i got into this, i made certain rules to myself to follow.
a few have been broken along the way, but this one is unbreakable in my eyes. i kinda got the feeling he thought i was just a cock tease with no intention of meeting him and just playing mind games.
am i weird???"
No! You are bloody sensible - stick with it!
Anyone pushes you to do otherwise is an automatic block!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And lets face it....single fems can have as many rules as they like
sorry just wanted to rub that in a bit
I wish lol... how do u do it girl... I dont think we do, or do we? It somehow doesnt feel fair onthe boys or am I too soft and soppy in my old age ? "
yeap way too soft on em...treat em mean keep em keen
also rules change as you go along = proof you are a fem |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And lets face it....single fems can have as many rules as they like
sorry just wanted to rub that in a bit
can you rub a bit harder please "
oooh yeah baby |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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TBH I wouldn't want to meet someone who was happy with the idea of meeting while their kids are in the house, and I'd totally understand a woman not wanting to meet there even if the kids aren't in. There are a lot of wierd people out there, the kind that may seem nice, but you wouldn't want them knowing where you live.
The safety and well being of your kids comes first above anything else, and if they can't accept that, get shot of them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"TBH I wouldn't want to meet someone who was happy with the idea of meeting while their kids are in the house, and I'd totally understand a woman not wanting to meet there even if the kids aren't in. There are a lot of wierd people out there, the kind that may seem nice, but you wouldn't want them knowing where you live.
The safety and well being of your kids comes first above anything else, and if they can't accept that, get shot of them."
Here here |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
There is another issue here, apart from kids at home .... I would not entertain anybody new...at home just i case I am picking up a stalker...or somebody with an agenda... there are safety issues to be considered...? With or without kids about... |
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By *ebzStarWoman
over a year ago
Notting |
"There is another issue here, apart from kids at home .... I would not entertain anybody new...at home just i case I am picking up a stalker...or somebody with an agenda... there are safety issues to be considered...? With or without kids about... "
How very true. |
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tis one of the things about being a single fem, how safe is safe?
i mean, i take measures, my neighbour knows everything i get upto, when i'm meeting, where, what time, who it is, etc. ya can never be too careful nowadays.
sorry to say, the world isn't the kinda place ya can leave ya door unlocked anymore. |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"tis one of the things about being a single fem, how safe is safe?
i mean, i take measures, my neighbour knows everything i get upto, when i'm meeting, where, what time, who it is, etc. ya can never be too careful nowadays.
sorry to say, the world isn't the kinda place ya can leave ya door unlocked anymore. "
It is easy to become negative and there is a fine line between being negative and being realistic.... swinging is no different from many other activities where you invite strangers into your private space, your home, your car whatever... The same rules apply I think, only with swining there can be an underlying assumption that girls are up for it simply by being on the site? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You just have to use common sense and trust your instincts. The moment something doesn't feel right, get rid. Usually gut instict is right, so go with it, you have to much at stake to risk it for some fun.
From the women I've met, and the stories they've told me, I'm beginning to realise that I'm probably rarer than the elusive single bi-fem |
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oh yeah, i'm female, so of course i'm gonna drop me knickers for every bloke that sends me a one line message and a pic of his cock.
its so sad that some men still think like that, they truly believe that they can leave mutual respect at the door just because this is fab swingers.
and no, not slagging every man on here, there are some really nice blokes on here that i have been lucky to speak and meet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"oh yeah, i'm female, so of course i'm gonna drop me knickers for every bloke that sends me a one line message and a pic of his cock.
its so sad that some men still think like that, they truly believe that they can leave mutual respect at the door just because this is fab swingers.
and no, not slagging every man on here, there are some really nice blokes on here that i have been lucky to speak and meet. "
I couldnt ave put it better myself |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
to be honest I have not met (as in encountered, chatted to, phoned etc)many men who were disrespectful. I´n all fairness those fall through the net BEFORE I would even consider meeting them... as I vet quite stringently... and often get friends to check them out, too.... So perhaps "guys" in general dont deserve to be portrayed as if most of them are predators? |
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"hmmmm, its kinda playing on my mind so i thought i would ask u lot and see what ya think.
i got a little nagged tonight to meet someone and the reason i wouldn't is because my son is here and i point blank refuse to never ever meet anyone when he's here.
the idea of him hearing anything or even worst, waking up and coming into my room while i'm on all 4's taking some scares the bejesus out of me. so when i got into this, i made certain rules to myself to follow.
a few have been broken along the way, but this one is unbreakable in my eyes. i kinda got the feeling he thought i was just a cock tease with no intention of meeting him and just playing mind games.
am i weird???"
No. I admire you for not doing it when you have your son there. You have morals and love your son. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"hmmmm, its kinda playing on my mind so i thought i would ask u lot and see what ya think.
i got a little nagged tonight to meet someone and the reason i wouldn't is because my son is here and i point blank refuse to never ever meet anyone when he's here.
the idea of him hearing anything or even worst, waking up and coming into my room while i'm on all 4's taking some scares the bejesus out of me. so when i got into this, i made certain rules to myself to follow.
a few have been broken along the way, but this one is unbreakable in my eyes. i kinda got the feeling he thought i was just a cock tease with no intention of meeting him and just playing mind games.
am i weird???"
No you are not weird. Far from it. No one - swinging or not should ever take someone into their home when there is a child there unless they are well known to you of course. I applaud totally what you did ..... kids first always. |
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I have played with a couple who had their kids in their house… yeah, there is a but coming… but it is a couple who have known me for a few years, they know their kids routine and I trusted them to know their kids routine, they had a big house and we played downstairs… nowhere near to where the kids were sleeping.
I have refused to play with a couple who had their kids in the house because I didn’t know them that well, nor them know me well… the size of the house and everything else didn’t even come into it.
I have also tried to discourage someone else from playing whilst they had their kid stopping overnight (for one night), in their flat … but they didn’t see the problem and in fact said “so what!” and went ahead and took the person they had just met the day before back for a play… because they couldn’t wait another day.
I guess at the end of the day it’s a judgement call… some better at making those calls than others.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always put my kids first - its a no-brainer! I have had to cancel meets at short notice due to my kids changing their plans and anyone who doesn't like that, well I'm afraid its tough! My kids are my real world and the rest is all just extra. Having said that, I have had some great meets and dont intend to quit anytime soon lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"hmmmm, its kinda playing on my mind so i thought i would ask u lot and see what ya think.
i got a little nagged tonight to meet someone and the reason i wouldn't is because my son is here and i point blank refuse to never ever meet anyone when he's here.
the idea of him hearing anything or even worst, waking up and coming into my room while i'm on all 4's taking some scares the bejesus out of me. so when i got into this, i made certain rules to myself to follow.
a few have been broken along the way, but this one is unbreakable in my eyes. i kinda got the feeling he thought i was just a cock tease with no intention of meeting him and just playing mind games.
am i weird???"
Not weird at all. No one can dictate to you the rules you set are bad etc. People who say that are generally doing so for their own interests. Set your rules and stick to them, simple as that! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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NO !!your defo not weird ,that is one rule i would stick too .i have broke rules and we learn by our mistakes but stick to your guns on that one .FRANKIE XX |
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just to all those that replied, i was woken up at 7 this morning to a plate of cold and soggy jam on toast, only to wonder downstairs to find me son cleaning the windows with my furniture polish, to say i nearly pissed myself laughing was an understatement.
have to say, waking up to that and the massive smile on his face like he had achieved something, waaaaaaaaaay better then any night of non-stop sex could ever be. god i love being a parent sometimes lol
oh, and ps, the non-stop sex nights do make a rather good second choice lol  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"just to all those that replied, i was woken up at 7 this morning to a plate of cold and soggy jam on toast, only to wonder downstairs to find me son cleaning the windows with my furniture polish, to say i nearly pissed myself laughing was an understatement.
have to say, waking up to that and the massive smile on his face like he had achieved something, waaaaaaaaaay better then any night of non-stop sex could ever be. god i love being a parent sometimes lol
oh, and ps, the non-stop sex nights do make a rather good second choice lol "
Aw bless hehe kids dont ya just luv em ahhhhhhhhh |
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"just to all those that replied, i was woken up at 7 this morning to a plate of cold and soggy jam on toast, only to wonder downstairs to find me son cleaning the windows with my furniture polish, to say i nearly pissed myself laughing was an understatement.
have to say, waking up to that and the massive smile on his face like he had achieved something, waaaaaaaaaay better then any night of non-stop sex could ever be. god i love being a parent sometimes lol
oh, and ps, the non-stop sex nights do make a rather good second choice lol "
Nice one!
As you say, it's great to be a parent sometimes! |
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By *im53Man
over a year ago
Boldon |
"hmmmm, its kinda playing on my mind so i thought i would ask u lot and see what ya think.
i got a little nagged tonight to meet someone and the reason i wouldn't is because my son is here and i point blank refuse to never ever meet anyone when he's here.
the idea of him hearing anything or even worst, waking up and coming into my room while i'm on all 4's taking some scares the bejesus out of me. so when i got into this, i made certain rules to myself to follow.
a few have been broken along the way, but this one is unbreakable in my eyes. i kinda got the feeling he thought i was just a cock tease with no intention of meeting him and just playing mind games.
am i weird???"
good for you stick to your own rules and if they dont like them tough..
there are plenty of blokes who will under stand |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"just to all those that replied, i was woken up at 7 this morning to a plate of cold and soggy jam on toast, only to wonder downstairs to find me son cleaning the windows with my furniture polish, to say i nearly pissed myself laughing was an understatement.
have to say, waking up to that and the massive smile on his face like he had achieved something, waaaaaaaaaay better then any night of non-stop sex could ever be. god i love being a parent sometimes lol
oh, and ps, the non-stop sex nights do make a rather good second choice lol "
Awwww I could feel the love in this post. Is refreshing and made me smile! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"just to all those that replied, i was woken up at 7 this morning to a plate of cold and soggy jam on toast, only to wonder downstairs to find me son cleaning the windows with my furniture polish, to say i nearly pissed myself laughing was an understatement.
have to say, waking up to that and the massive smile on his face like he had achieved something, waaaaaaaaaay better then any night of non-stop sex could ever be. god i love being a parent sometimes lol
oh, and ps, the non-stop sex nights do make a rather good second choice lol "
How do I get mine to do this???
I woke up to hear: gimme it back its mine MUM tell her its mine NO its mine
Guess what it wasnt theirs at all it was MINE!!!
Kids ehh
Shona
x x x |
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" from miss serenity OP ......
i got a little nagged tonight to meet someone and the reason i wouldn't is because my son is here
........... "
I'm of the opinion that as soon as any conversation begins to feel like nagging it's time to stop the conversation.
Anyone wishing to be nagged is welcome to get married |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Imho, ladies of whatever status deserve 100% respect, and this clown obviously wasn't respecting your situation, your decision, in fact even you as a person!
You say "no", then that's it. I don't know but possibly you were happy with him up until he started twisting your arm, so all that's happened is he's lost out totally! Hell mend him!!
I was chatting to a lady and the initial meet was to be social, but then the school holidays arrived and although she was happy for me still to come in, I just didn't think I'd feel comfortable with a couple of kids running about! So it was put on the back burner and I'll be seeing her soon, now that the schools up here are back.
Personally, I would think it's better to keep the 2 lives separate!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Trampus said: Personally I would think its better to keep the 2 lives seperate.
Hun I would have thought with soo many people claiming to want and assuring privicy and descretion that more would think the same way . . . alsas not so.
We have heard too many horror stories about people getting pushed into meets when they arent ready or dont feel comfortable with the other person/people to ever want this hobby anywhere near my kids. As a result we only meet when the kids are at school and if you pester us for a late night meet well you aint gonna hear from us again cos your blocked and deleted.
I always think well if you cant respect my wanting my kids out of the way you aint gonna stop if I ask you to are you???
Shona
x x x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Definitely the right decision!
I've been in this situation on more than one occasion. I've never and will never back down.
Everytime I've gone against my first instinct I've regretted it.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Imho, ladies of whatever status deserve 100% respect, and this clown obviously wasn't respecting your situation, your decision, in fact even you as a person!
"
I totally agree... and I include wives/ husbands/boyfiends/girlfriends of many of the singles on here for a quick shag.
respect to all ...
Anyone who doesn't want to accomodate with kids, shouldn't ... and shouldn't be pressurised to do so.
good luck for the future and sorry to hear about the guy on your other thread.
x |
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