FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > When you say no thanks your not for me
When you say no thanks your not for me
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You don't need to reply back though. Site rules state deleted messages means no thanks not interested.
If folks can't accept those rules or don't even bother to read them before messaging, then that's on them, not you. Harsh but fair.
Also there's the aspect of junk mail. You didn't ask for those messages so the sender sends at their own risk. No one is owed anything on this site.
It's not your fault when someone refuses to abide by site rules then acts entilted. Just block and move on.
I've been harassed, called all the names under the sun and then threatened by some guys. However If they read profiles before sending messages, they wouldn't of wasted their own time in the first place.  |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
Due to abuse and asking the why question, is the reason why I don't bother responding in the first place.
You might think it is rude, but \I can't be arsed for any drama, I have enough in my real life to take any shit from a total stranger! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yeah it’s annoying when I send a reply saying I’m not meeting at the moment so then they send one saying can’t we just chat and then when I say no thank you.. its the why.... and then the abuse sometimes hahaha x |
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"Yeah it’s annoying when I send a reply saying I’m not meeting at the moment so then they send one saying can’t we just chat and then when I say no thank you.. its the why.... and then the abuse sometimes hahaha x"
We didn’t give you any abuse. It was only a photo for face pic Friday!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And then they ask why?. I think it’s polite enough to reply saying no thanks."
Your message of disinterest should be followed by:
Please note I have already taken the time to notify you of my disinterest out of consideration.
I'd prefer for you to accept it for what it is, rather than make it awkward asking why, as I have no intention of spending any more time on this with further correspondence.
Thanks in advance.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And then they ask why?. I think it’s polite enough to reply saying no thanks.
Your message of disinterest should be followed by:
Please note I have already taken the time to notify you of my disinterest out of consideration.
I'd prefer for you to accept it for what it is, rather than make it awkward asking why, as I have no intention of spending any more time on this with further correspondence.
Thanks in advance. "
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In public when I give replies to people that it's very clear provides a 100% closed barrier, social common sense would prevent people from pushing any further.
If people do repeat questions like that in public, I typically repeat the answer, ad finitum, until they stop asking.
On Fab, it's generally appropriate to block, if people persist asking following a polite 'no thanks' imo. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yeah it’s annoying when I send a reply saying I’m not meeting at the moment so then they send one saying can’t we just chat and then when I say no thank you.. its the why.... and then the abuse sometimes hahaha x
We didn’t give you any abuse. It was only a photo for face pic Friday! "
Hahah awww I like your pics!!!! mwah xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think a thankyou but no thanks is more than satisfactory iv had a few and respect that response, but when they just deleat your message and even block you thats just harsh man totaly harsh |
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"You don't need to reply back though. Site rules state deleted messages means no thanks not interested.
If folks can't accept those rules or don't even bother to read them before messaging, then that's on them, not you. Harsh but fair.
Also there's the aspect of junk mail. You didn't ask for those messages so the sender sends at their own risk. No one is owed anything on this site.
It's not your fault when someone refuses to abide by site rules then acts entilted. Just block and move on.
I've been harassed, called all the names under the sun and then threatened by some guys. However If they read profiles before sending messages, they wouldn't of wasted their own time in the first place. "
Spot on on all points. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yeah it’s annoying when I send a reply saying I’m not meeting at the moment so then they send one saying can’t we just chat and then when I say no thank you.. its the why.... and then the abuse sometimes hahaha x"
I think the abuse is funny... Perhaps that's why i don't get any - they don't want to feed my fun  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Would it be helpful I wonder if the site provided a 'Thank you for your interest, but having reviewed your profile, I don't believe you're what I'm looking for' response option for replying to mail? One that worked much like message filters, so that if the person then tried to send a further message asking why you're not interested (or just pushing their luck), they get the 'WAIT. Think. This user has already said they're not interested, do you really want a response of give it up twat ' warning)"
That was a FTFY moment |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If they ask why, that just gets deleted, unless I feel sorry for them and have some spare time. I rarely get abuse, my standard copy/paste reply seems to do the trick for most people. "
Same. |
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"And then they ask why?. I think it’s polite enough to reply saying no thanks.
They should think themselves lucky for the reply.. "
That’s exactly me. If I get reply (and I never expect one) saying “thanks but no thanks” or words to that effect, I either leave it there or thanks them fo the reply and wish them the best of luck. Not everyone is interested in everyone and people need to to accept that. I never understand the abuse some people give for being turned down. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Depends on the person and what kind of mood I'm in. If they seem genuine and someone I might like but won't meet for whatever reason, then I'll often give an honest answer but not get drawn into further conversation.
If it's someone who clearly hasn't even read my page or sends a crass message with some disgusting photo or other, then I'll ignore any further questions. Except if I'm in a bitchy mood and then I might send a detailed and sarcastic explanation of why I would rather deep fry my own eyeballs than have anything to do with them  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We don't reply to the vast majority of messages we receive. Why should we? Our profile clearly states what we are looking for so it's not our fault that people don't read it! |
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"If they ask why, that just gets deleted, unless I feel sorry for them and have some spare time. I rarely get abuse, my standard copy/paste reply seems to do the trick for most people. "
Same here, once I've said "no thanks" I'm done. I don't enter into a conversation about it. Works for me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We don't reply to the vast majority of messages we receive. Why should we? Our profile clearly states what we are looking for so it's not our fault that people don't read it! "
Or read it and think what the hell I'll give it a shot anyway |
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