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Why are you single?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

How do people answer that, without making it sound like you're faulty?

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By *oodnitegirlWoman over a year ago

Yorkshire

Cos it’s easier at this moment in my life

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How do people answer that, without making it sound like you're faulty? "

Damn. Was going to say selfish. Like, being able to starfish the bed kinda selfish

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How do people answer that, without making it sound like you're faulty? "

I'm single because it is my fault

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By *atindollTV/TS over a year ago

edinburgh

Because

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I’m very picky and not going to settle for anyone.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I haven't found anyone to inspire me to want to be in a relationship.

(the actual answer is commitment issues and I'm an emotional retard)

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By *irginieWoman over a year ago

Near Marlborough

Is that really a question people ask?

V x

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By *rincess peachWoman over a year ago

shits creek

Because I am faulty

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By *iger.10Man over a year ago

Llantrisant

"How do people answer that, without making it sound like you're faulty? "

Why not?

Spin the whole question back, unless of course it's a cheeky chat up line as its a way of complimenting you and not any deep and meaningful question. Some people are in a relationship to need, not want someone.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Because I don't want to be in a relationship.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Its a mistery im adorable

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Is that really a question people ask?

V x "

Very often in my experience

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Because i’ve not found anyone brave enough to take me on!

Although i’ve been engaged twice so that’ll do me.

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By *rincess peachWoman over a year ago

shits creek

I'll rephrase my original answer. I require a special skill set to keep my interest and earn my trust.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Is that really a question people ask?

V x "

I get asked a surprising amount

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By *eter 4 funMan over a year ago

Portsmouth

Because I found out I am allergic to wedding cake.

I found out it plays me up some years after eating it.

Mind you. I had to try it 3 bloody times before I realised it was the cake.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

But in my situation where I would very much like to be taken off the shelf, how would I answer it?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

im having a selfish moment

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By *itty9899Man over a year ago

Craggy Island

I'm fussy, I'm picky, I haven't really gone out to look for a relationship, I don't get d*unk and shag the first woman that winks at me ...and I can barely look after myself let alone a relationship ....and apparently I no one's type

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"But in my situation where I would very much like to be taken off the shelf, how would I answer it?"

That’s my situation too. I guess it’s just all down to fate and I haven’t yet met the right person at the right time and in the right circumstances

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"But in my situation where I would very much like to be taken off the shelf, how would I answer it?"

I think you know the answer to that.

But as far as anyone else is concerned, not met the right person yet

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Is that really a question people ask?

V x "

Yes, I get it all the time. They say they can’t believe I’m single. It’s annoying.

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By *uiet LightMan over a year ago

Hove

"How do people answer that, without making it sound like you're faulty?

Why not?

This.

I usually go for something along the lines of "well, why are you in a relationship?" or "because I didn't want to settle for just anyone"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’m very picky and not going to settle for anyone. "

Pretty much this. When you've been madly in love then you want that feeling again. I'm not going to settle for companionship or lust or friendship... I want THE LOT and I'd rather be single than go through the motions.

I've got a mate that can't stay single, he just can't be alone (but he won't admit to that) and he makes bad choices with women.

I know exactly what I want and I'll just have to hope that she's out there. I really want kids as well so it's a bit of a shitter being single but if I have to adopt then so be it.

Waffle over...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just say single and looking. The why is irrelevant really, as it’s nobody elses business

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By *iger.10Man over a year ago

Llantrisant

"But in my situation where I would very much like to be taken off the shelf, how would I answer it?"

Just say I'm yet to find someone with that special spark that I feel I want to develop a relationship with. Anyone in their right mind knows that's the key component.....and obviously amazing, hot sex

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

This.

"How do people answer that, without making it sound like you're faulty?

I'm single because it is my fault

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By *itvclaireTV/TS over a year ago

Birmingham

Trying to find someone that accepts both sides of me is nigh on impossible. Think they jealous of my legs.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Most women can’t take my massive.....,

Ego

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

And haven’t found the right hot/crazy balance

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I've only just got out of a long term relationship and I'm quote happy as I am.

Have my daughter a couple of nights a week and I live with a pair of happily gay bunnies so all is good.

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By *ittleAcornMan over a year ago

visiting the beach

It's not a question I get asked. Probably to do with my age and sex!

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By *risky_MareWoman over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

Because my standards are too high, it would seem!

If I were you, I'd probably say something like 'Cos I haven't found anyone man enough!' lol!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How do people answer that, without making it sound like you're faulty? "

Because I want to be - simples

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I’d love to settle down but nobody wants me for who I really am

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By *ayMyName123Man over a year ago

Barnsley

"How do people answer that, without making it sound like you're faulty? "

Because I can be

Don’t get me wrong ... I’d love someone by my side .

But this may sound very obnoxious and arrogant, it’s not meant that way

But I’ll only get into a relationship with the lady I fall for this way nobody gets hurt there’s no settling for second best

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’d love to settle down but nobody wants me for who I really am

And what is that?

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By *iss.RedWoman over a year ago

somewhere

"But in my situation where I would very much like to be taken off the shelf, how would I answer it?"

Because you're not prepared to settle. That's my answer anyway

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How do people answer that, without making it sound like you're faulty?

I'm single because it is my fault

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By *uciyassMan over a year ago

Leeds

"Cos it’s easier at this moment in my life"

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By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

"But in my situation where I would very much like to be taken off the shelf, how would I answer it?"

I think in your situation it’s because what you seek is already taken , or in great demand .

So you could only answer by saying that your selection standards are way too high to realistically expect to find Mr Right at this moment in time .

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By *iss.HoneyWoman over a year ago

...

I'm not...hurrah!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm not...hurrah!"

You will be if he finds you on here

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm not...hurrah!"

Happily not single or not single and ducking other people secretly kind of thing though ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm not...hurrah!"

Show off.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I left my ex for a variety of bloody good reasons that I struggled hard to accommodate but eventually realised it was just best for everyone if I took the courageous step and left.

I would appreciate it if singles were clear as to whether they left or got left. Why? Because I don't want to date someone who was left

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My partner ran off with someone on

Here we met LOL

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I left my ex for a variety of bloody good reasons that I struggled hard to accommodate but eventually realised it was just best for everyone if I took the courageous step and left.

I would appreciate it if singles were clear as to whether they left or got left. Why? Because I don't want to date someone who was left "

Good luck with that!! People are left for a number of reasons.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Because I’m happy with my life as it is.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm too good to be true...wink wink

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Have you been asked why you are single OP? I don’t see the relevance!! Your single end of... if you choose to discuss the background with someone once your at that stage that is up to you!

I have read many of your comments and I know it’s hard when you want something and it seems so elusive... from your pics you seem very attractive so try not to yearn too much (easier said then done)

I too am single.. I left my husband.. and at times I really really miss that feeling of been wanted and that intimate connection with someone... But I’m not ready for a full on relationship yet..I’m enjoying having my own space.. . yes I’d like the fun bits of going out for drinks and meals.to chat and laugh and have fun..go to the cinema and of course amazing filthy sex so I think that’s what I’m maybe looking for.. and at this time that might be with just a couple of people haha??!! Of course if someone really liked me and wanted to see me on a regular basis I’d be thrilled (as long as I liked them haha) but I don’t see that happening really... But who knows who or what is around the corner...

Just be kind to yourself.... go easy.. remember you are worth so much and don’t see that because your not with someone that it’s a negative on you... it’s not you just haven’t found him yet!!!!

Hugs xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Is that really a question people ask?

V x

Yes, I get it all the time. They say they can’t believe I’m single. It’s annoying. "

I had someone say that to me the other day. I know it was meant to flatter but I've only been on the market for 6 months and 3 of that I wasn't looking

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By *risky_MareWoman over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I left my ex for a variety of bloody good reasons that I struggled hard to accommodate but eventually realised it was just best for everyone if I took the courageous step and left.

I would appreciate it if singles were clear as to whether they left or got left. Why? Because I don't want to date someone who was left "

Hahaha, you cannot be serious!? I think it's about time you had a word with someone about narcissism.....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I left my ex for a variety of bloody good reasons that I struggled hard to accommodate but eventually realised it was just best for everyone if I took the courageous step and left.

I would appreciate it if singles were clear as to whether they left or got left. Why? Because I don't want to date someone who was left

Good luck with that!! People are left for a number of reasons. "

Yeah. I guess the poster above you is an example of someone where I'd rather not date the woman who left. Hadn't thought of that

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm not...hurrah!

Happily not single or not single and ducking other people secretly kind of thing though ?

Quackers.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Is that really a question people ask?

V x

Yes, I get it all the time. They say they can’t believe I’m single. It’s annoying.

I had someone say that to me the other day. I know it was meant to flatter but I've only been on the market for 6 months and 3 of that I wasn't looking

Truth is, the couple of guys I really liked in the last 2 years didn’t want the same things as me. I don’t want kids and they did. Just a case of bad timing. It’s also really hard to get past 2 dates in London, it’s very brutal.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Is that really a question people ask?

V x

Yes, I get it all the time. They say they can’t believe I’m single. It’s annoying.

I had someone say that to me the other day. I know it was meant to flatter but I've only been on the market for 6 months and 3 of that I wasn't looking

Ouch! That does sound brutal

I think it's easier out here in the sticks. More difficult to find someone compatible perhaps. But when you do there's often quite an impetus to meet more than twice

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I left my ex for a variety of bloody good reasons that I struggled hard to accommodate but eventually realised it was just best for everyone if I took the courageous step and left.

I would appreciate it if singles were clear as to whether they left or got left. Why? Because I don't want to date someone who was left

Hahaha, you cannot be serious!? I think it's about time you had a word with someone about narcissism.....

I did... I had a talk with the God within me

Seriously though... you're right it was a flippant and provocative response from a guy in a flippant and provocative mood. I'm guessing much of the rest of the thread will be composed of people reading that far and telling me I'm a twunt.

My main thing is that I don't knowingly want to date a cheat. I just don't think I could ever trust them

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Is that really a question people ask?

V x

Yes, I get it all the time. They say they can’t believe I’m single. It’s annoying.

I had someone say that to me the other day. I know it was meant to flatter but I've only been on the market for 6 months and 3 of that I wasn't looking

Ouch! That does sound brutal

I think it's easier out here in the sticks. More difficult to find someone compatible perhaps. But when you do there's often quite an impetus to meet more than twice "

Yeah, I’ve only been in London for 3 years since me and ex hubby broke up. It was much easier to date when I lived in Birmingham. It was different back in 2003 when I was last single. I don’t find it hard getting dates but it’s finding the right match. I have very high standards as my ex was a wonderful person and we are still good friends.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Because I want to be.

It's that simple!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"But in my situation where I would very much like to be taken off the shelf, how would I answer it?"

I got to the end of the queue and who I was looking for wasn’t there. Are you going to be first in the new one?

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By *r TriomanMan over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

"I left my ex for a variety of bloody good reasons that I struggled hard to accommodate but eventually realised it was just best for everyone if I took the courageous step and left.

I would appreciate it if singles were clear as to whether they left or got left. Why? Because I don't want to date someone who was left

Hahaha, you cannot be serious!? I think it's about time you had a word with someone about narcissism.....

I did... I had a talk with the God within me

My main thing is that I don't knowingly want to date a cheat. I just don't think I could ever trust them "

Being a 'leaver' or a 'leftie' doesn't define you as a cheat.

So if a person was left by someone it must be because they cheated - no other explanation could be possible.

Leaving someone for your lover makes a 'leaver' a cheat but there are so many others reasons to leave.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Is it then a woman's prerogative to not disclose how long she's been single for or would you just look shady if you kept that information to yourself? Lie or tell the truth which opens up another crate of bananas. You've been single 9 years,wow that's a long time, fucks wrong with you then?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Is it then a woman's prerogative to not disclose how long she's been single for or would you just look shady if you kept that information to yourself? Lie or tell the truth which opens up another crate of bananas. You've been single 9 years,wow that's a long time, fucks wrong with you then? "

That’s the reaction I feel like I get. I’ve been single almost 8 years... I can feel guys recoiling when I tell them

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think your over thinking it... you can’t change the fact you’ve been single 9 years... if you meet someone and it goes down that path of having those type of talks just be honest... it’s that old age saying ... “what will be.. will be” why lie you have nothing to be ashamed of and if that person really truly likes you it shouldn’t stop them!!! And if it does then just think he’s a tosser and move on!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If any potential partner is interested in how long you’ve been single, he’s interested in the wrong parts of your life and not worth the time.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If any potential partner is interested in how long you’ve been single, he’s interested in the wrong parts of your life and not worth the time. "

This!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm single because I couldn't make my happy ever after work, no matter how hard I tried.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Tell them you've had a few short relationships. It's kind of true. Last one was the other month.

If they ask for more info I'd tell them to fuck off because it's none of their business.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How do people answer that, without making it sound like you're faulty? "

I am faulty. No point sugar coating it.

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By *iss.HoneyWoman over a year ago

...

"I'm not...hurrah!

You will be if he finds you on here

He did find me on here.

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By *iss.HoneyWoman over a year ago

...

"I'm not...hurrah!

Show off.

Hey now, my turn at being a stepford wife has been a long time coming

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Atropos I would have no problem with a woman confessing she'd been single for 9 years, or even her whole life. If there's chemistry, there's chemistry. And life isn't straightforward. So I can easily imagine some pretty wonderful people just haven't found the right person to nest with.

What I would be worried about though is that this may mean the woman is too protective and cautious and doesn't lend herself to falling in love. If she's going to hold back emotionally like that it's unlikely to work. She's undermining herself and her relationships. I'd also be worried that she is too uncompromising, that she'll eventually find some thing wrong with me too (I know... even me! Haha

). Or that she will want me to totally accommodate her but not have any flexibility on accommodating me.

If you can fend off these worries, show you're willing to fall in love (maybe don't say it but just demonstrate that you're emotionally open), and that you're willing to compromise for the right (real not fantastical) guy. Then I can't see the length of your singleness being an issue. Good luck

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By *iss.HoneyWoman over a year ago

...

"I'm not...hurrah!

Happily not single or not single and ducking other people secretly kind of thing though ?

Not single.

Might even be a wedding

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm not...hurrah!

Happily not single or not single and ducking other people secretly kind of thing though ?

Not single.

Might even be a wedding

Are you open to polygamy?

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By *azza80Woman over a year ago

Your wildest Dreams

Im single cuz I choose to be, and I am stil healing from recent break up..which was my choice but had to be done. Plus I hav commitment issues xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm not...hurrah!

You will be if he finds you on here

He did find me on here.

Whooooop

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm not...hurrah!

Show off.

Hey now, my turn at being a stepford wife has been a long time coming

oh yeah, you're the very image of Stepford Wife.

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By *irginieWoman over a year ago

Near Marlborough

Is that really a question people ask?

V x

Yes, I get it all the time. They say they can’t believe I’m single. It’s annoying. "

Oh I get the “can’t believe your single” which isn’t a question so I can just smile and ignore. But I don’t think I have directly been asked why I am single.

I’d be inclined to answer “it’s because I’m overqualified”.

V x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You say, he had issues that I wasn't able to help with.

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By *irginieWoman over a year ago

Near Marlborough

YOU’RE

Ooooh my goodness a terrible error.

V x

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By *iss.HoneyWoman over a year ago

...

"I'm not...hurrah!

Show off.

Hey now, my turn at being a stepford wife has been a long time coming

oh yeah, you're the very image of Stepford Wife. "

I've been buying teacups

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Because right now it's much simpler with kids growing up and the travel I do due to work and interests. If I found someone who enjoyed the travel as much as myself then I may not stay single much longer.

Raise your hand if interested...

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By *iss.HoneyWoman over a year ago

...

"I'm not...hurrah!

Happily not single or not single and ducking other people secretly kind of thing though ?

Not single.

Might even be a wedding

Are you open to polygamy?

Nope!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Fussy

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I’m single as I like to date both sexes

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By *uiet LightMan over a year ago

Hove

"I think your over thinking it... you can’t change the fact you’ve been single 9 years... if you meet someone and it goes down that path of having those type of talks just be honest... it’s that old age saying ... “what will be.. will be” why lie you have nothing to be ashamed of and if that person really truly likes you it shouldn’t stop them!!! And if it does then just think he’s a tosser and move on!!

Xx"

Plus nine years is nothing, I've been single almost my entire adult life...so I must be fucked haha

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By *rincess peachWoman over a year ago

shits creek

Why am I single?

I'm gonna try this again now I've had a little thinking time.

I'm single because I refuse to be treated like a door mat, I have learned to trust my gut instincts as they're often way more reliable than the words that come from the mouths of others.

I'm not the easiest person to pull the wool over my eyes, and I do expect honesty, which shall be given in return.

I like to laugh, and will take the piss out of myself, some people see it as me putting myself down. I'm not, I'm simply poking fun.

I don't like people who are narrow minded and believe they're right about everything.

They can go fuck right off.

I don't walk around in lingerie or a dress 24/7 with a full face of make up and hair done.

I like trannies (this tends to freak some people out- see narrow mindedness just above)

Oh, and most importantly, I won't get into a relationship because society expects it of me, or just to have someone around.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Plus nine years is nothing, I've been single almost my entire adult life...so I must be fucked haha

Haha not at all!!! I don’t see anything wrong if people are single for a long time!! X

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It's says on this label. Faulty goods return to sender

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm single because I'm secure and enjoy multiple diverse relationships.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It's says on this label. Faulty goods return to sender

Awww don’t say that!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why am I single?

I'm gonna try this again now I've had a little thinking time.

I'm single because I refuse to be treated like a door mat, I have learned to trust my gut instincts as they're often way more reliable than the words that come from the mouths of others.

I'm not the easiest person to pull the wool over my eyes, and I do expect honesty, which shall be given in return.

I like to laugh, and will take the piss out of myself, some people see it as me putting myself down. I'm not, I'm simply poking fun.

I don't like people who are narrow minded and believe they're right about everything.

They can go fuck right off.

I don't walk around in lingerie or a dress 24/7 with a full face of make up and hair done.

I like trannies (this tends to freak some people out- see narrow mindedness just above)

Oh, and most importantly, I won't get into a relationship because society expects it of me, or just to have someone around. "

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By *alking DisasterWoman over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

"But in my situation where I would very much like to be taken off the shelf, how would I answer it?"

You haven't found the right person and you won't settle for anything less!

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By *offee with MilkCouple over a year ago

Over the roundabout and then turn right.

I'm single because my mother in law couldn't have children

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm single through choice - hers!

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By *iss.HoneyWoman over a year ago

...

"Why am I single?

I'm gonna try this again now I've had a little thinking time.

I'm single because I refuse to be treated like a door mat, I have learned to trust my gut instincts as they're often way more reliable than the words that come from the mouths of others.

I'm not the easiest person to pull the wool over my eyes, and I do expect honesty, which shall be given in return.

I like to laugh, and will take the piss out of myself, some people see it as me putting myself down. I'm not, I'm simply poking fun.

I don't like people who are narrow minded and believe they're right about everything.

They can go fuck right off.

I don't walk around in lingerie or a dress 24/7 with a full face of make up and hair done.

I like trannies (this tends to freak some people out- see narrow mindedness just above)

Oh, and most importantly, I won't get into a relationship because society expects it of me, or just to have someone around. "

See. You aren't faulty

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By *rincess peachWoman over a year ago

shits creek

"Why am I single?

I'm gonna try this again now I've had a little thinking time.

I'm single because I refuse to be treated like a door mat, I have learned to trust my gut instincts as they're often way more reliable than the words that come from the mouths of others.

I'm not the easiest person to pull the wool over my eyes, and I do expect honesty, which shall be given in return.

I like to laugh, and will take the piss out of myself, some people see it as me putting myself down. I'm not, I'm simply poking fun.

I don't like people who are narrow minded and believe they're right about everything.

They can go fuck right off.

I don't walk around in lingerie or a dress 24/7 with a full face of make up and hair done.

I like trannies (this tends to freak some people out- see narrow mindedness just above)

Oh, and most importantly, I won't get into a relationship because society expects it of me, or just to have someone around.

See. You aren't faulty "

I am a little. I mean, I fart loads.

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By *iss.HoneyWoman over a year ago

...

"Why am I single?

I'm gonna try this again now I've had a little thinking time.

I'm single because I refuse to be treated like a door mat, I have learned to trust my gut instincts as they're often way more reliable than the words that come from the mouths of others.

I'm not the easiest person to pull the wool over my eyes, and I do expect honesty, which shall be given in return.

I like to laugh, and will take the piss out of myself, some people see it as me putting myself down. I'm not, I'm simply poking fun.

I don't like people who are narrow minded and believe they're right about everything.

They can go fuck right off.

I don't walk around in lingerie or a dress 24/7 with a full face of make up and hair done.

I like trannies (this tends to freak some people out- see narrow mindedness just above)

Oh, and most importantly, I won't get into a relationship because society expects it of me, or just to have someone around.

See. You aren't faulty

I am a little. I mean, I fart loads. "

I don't

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By *alking DisasterWoman over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

"I left my ex for a variety of bloody good reasons that I struggled hard to accommodate but eventually realised it was just best for everyone if I took the courageous step and left.

I would appreciate it if singles were clear as to whether they left or got left. Why? Because I don't want to date someone who was left

Hahaha, you cannot be serious!? I think it's about time you had a word with someone about narcissism.....

I did... I had a talk with the God within me

My main thing is that I don't knowingly want to date a cheat. I just don't think I could ever trust them "

Why do you automatically assume that someone who has been left cheated on their partner

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By *irginieWoman over a year ago

Near Marlborough

"I’m single as I like to date both sexes "

Why are you so far away

V x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’m very picky and not going to settle for anyone. "

I agree with this statement but I also feel for someone to be my actual partner they need to be very caring loving and understanding because I have some limitations

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why do you automatically assume that someone who has been left cheated on their partner

I guess I haven't given it much thought before. Someone being left evokes a range of images from them being unbearable to live with, perhaps even abusive, maybe sexless, and possibly them having cheated. I guess one more positive reason is that the guy they were with was a twat who walked out on them for no reason to do with them. I guess a lot of relationships end up as just flatmates. So that's more of a neutral scenario. It also takes two to tango. I guess it's possible that someone who was abusive or a pain in the arse in a prior relationship may not be so in the next. But I personally wouldn't want to stick around to find out

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Cause I’m a free spirit, I can’t be chain to there rules, a maverick if you will. I do my own thang. Anywho better go, my boss has just turned up.

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By *ittleAcornMan over a year ago

visiting the beach

This has been, on the whole, an interesting and thoughtful/provoking thread.

It's led me to think about what exactly being single is.

I am in three relationships of varying types, but on the face of it am single. In that I do not share my home/life with someone on a day to day basis.

But I am happy with this. Probably happy than for a good chunk of my marriage.

But again I wonder if the expectations of me, from friends and family, are different to those for younger people.

People are more willing to allow me to live "unconventionally" now as I've done it properly in the past!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Is that really a question people ask?

V x

Yes, I get it all the time. They say they can’t believe I’m single. It’s annoying. "

Yeah me too tbh but not found anyone that could even come close to be able to handle me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Cause I’m a free spirit, I can’t be chain to there rules, a maverick if you will. I do my own thang. Anywho better go, my boss has just turned up. "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I've been divorced for 19 years; I became totally free of him 8 and a half years ago.

When I'm asked why I'm still single I tell the truth.

If they don't like hearing that, they aren't the man for me.

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By *eanut Butter CupWoman over a year ago

B & M Bargains

I’m single because I’m a slut, a total bitch and shit in bed (apparently!)

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

I haven't found the right person for me,it's not looking like I ever will.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Because that's what i want to be...

I don't need to be part of a couple to have a fulfilling life, i can do what i like, go where i like and meet who i like and still be happy

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By *reedom to be meMan over a year ago

St Helier

I would say it’s a choice as most people who are single have been married in a relationship and realize what they prefer

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By *reedom to be meMan over a year ago

St Helier

I agree

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"But in my situation where I would very much like to be taken off the shelf, how would I answer it?"

Are you sat on the top shelf? If so, maybe that's the problem.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Because no time for a social life at the moment plus difficult to find a guy who would satisfy me intellectually and in a bed.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because no time for a social life at the moment plus difficult to find a guy who would satisfy me intellectually and in a bed.

Not asking for much

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Shallow people is the reason there is single people..A big person/or not very good looking person gets over looked by most males/females...shallow ... Looks n size isnt everything ( except to the people who are shallow haha... If your different your odd to them kinds...

Just saying !

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because no time for a social life at the moment plus difficult to find a guy who would satisfy me intellectually and in a bed.

Not asking for much

No...I have minimum requirements

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Shallow people is the reason there is single people..A big person/or not very good looking person gets over looked by most males/females...shallow ... Looks n size isnt everything ( except to the people who are shallow haha... If your different your odd to them kinds...

Just saying !

I prefer brain stimulation than look.

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By *issmorganWoman over a year ago

Calderdale innit

I used to tell people that I'd rather be on my own ,than with someone just for the sake of it,when I was single.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just saying !

Nice one lola

I prefer brain stimulation than look.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Because I'm at university 230 miles away from my hometown, and I don't see the point in getting into a relationship only to have it end in a year when I go back home

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Because I’m just too flipping fussy

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"But in my situation where I would very much like to be taken off the shelf, how would I answer it?"

You haven't found the right person to match my crazy. If they stay you're sound.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How do people answer that, without making it sound like you're faulty? "
for hot people it's usually a choice

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Mines pretty easy. I'm pretty useless with lasses. Chatting up is a foreign language and intimacy is hard for me. But in the bedroom I'm calm and ready for fun.

Its that middle step from friendly chat to lets fuck.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How do people answer that, without making it sound like you're faulty? for hot people it's usually a choice "

Thats not true for all. I know a fair few hot people being at uni. They (male and female) have tried but they get fake people and, they want something real. They want to be with them for image and not for them.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"How do people answer that, without making it sound like you're faulty? "
because I'm complex and hard to please this making me hard to live with

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It seems from the thread Some people are single because they truly want to be and choose to be... others are not due to life and circumstances etc... if it’s not through choice then I get why people get so fed up!! But it doesn’t change the fact if your single or not! So you just have to get on with it and hope it won’t be forever!! And if it is forever well as us single people say... it’s their loss!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Becaise i wear sunnys on cloudy days

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By *iSTARessWoman over a year ago

London

I don't fancy the ones that want me.

The ones I fancy only want a fuck.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don't fancy the ones that want me.

The ones I fancy only want a fuck."

Yep. This sounds about right.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Cos I want to be.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Because my former FWB was not that dumb XXX

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"I don't fancy the ones that want me.

The ones I fancy only want a fuck.

Yep. This sounds about right."

Yep.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don't fancy the ones that want me.

The ones I fancy only want a fuck.

Yep. This sounds about right.

Yep."

Yep maybe a bit of this and also the last guy I really fell for last year and who I wanted to be with ended up being a lying cheating Knob!

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By *sagent81Man over a year ago

Leeds

I am not single...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

quite simply as i have never been asked by someone to be there boyfriend /partner or to marry them ..

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By *entleman JayMan over a year ago

Wakefield

I was with the same person for 28 years. Now I’m having some personal me time.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Well this is going to be a long answer.

Firstly, I am suffering depression, so unless someone absolutely amazing comes along, I'm working on me. I tend to end up in abusive relationships when I am suffering, so trying not to do that this time.

Secondly, there is this terrible thing where it seems that anyone I am interested in holds no interest for me, or vice versa.

Third, my social life is not great at the moment. It can be a struggle to leave my bedroom, let alone go out and meet people. A lot of my friends have either settled down and disappeared off the face of the earth or moved. I walked away from the local fetish scene, both to avoid an ex and because I had enough of all the bickering, arguing, abuse, and childishness. So, no going to fet social events means not meeting anyone through that avenue, and gigs (to which I tend to go to alone) tend to be sausagefests that probably have a ratio of one woman to thirty guys.

So, basically, nobody who I like is interested, I won't just be in a relationship because I end up in bad ones when I do that, and the venue if anyone is interested, I'll probably never get to meet them anyway

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By *riefcase_WankerMan over a year ago

Milton Keynes

I have never wanted children and always been very up front and honest about that.

At 22 it wasn't an issue...15 years later it was - and when an irresistible force meets an immovable object, something's gotta give...

So now I'm single because I'm not prepared to go back to constantly arguing all the time and making each other unhappy. She thinks it could work and would be a good idea.

I disagree

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Because i wasn't ready to let someone in again. Now i feel I'm ready to dip my toe back in again, so watch this space

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because i wasn't ready to let someone in again. Now i feel I'm ready to dip my toe back in again, so watch this space

Up to mischief again

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I have never wanted children and always been very up front and honest about that.

At 22 it wasn't an issue...15 years later it was - and when an irresistible force meets an immovable object, something's gotta give...

So now I'm single because I'm not prepared to go back to constantly arguing all the time and making each other unhappy. She thinks it could work and would be a good idea.

I disagree"

That is also a thing. I prefer animals to children. Unfortunately at thirty nine, most women around my age have kids from one or more relationships. It must have been something they wanted, but isn't something for me

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By *crumdiddlyumptiousMan over a year ago

Like a few people have said, Throughout my whole life the ones I like don't like me and vise versa,

These days I work all week and when I get home and don't go out, I only go out drinking when its a birthday or organised social events usually with Men or 90% of the people there are couples,

Simply put I'm not dating material but I'm also shallow as fuck so that doesn't help

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because i wasn't ready to let someone in again. Now i feel I'm ready to dip my toe back in again, so watch this space

Up to mischief again

Always

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I've never had a relationship. Something must be wrong with me.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I've never had a relationship. Something must be wrong with me. "

It’s that inbetweeners look

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because i wasn't ready to let someone in again. Now i feel I'm ready to dip my toe back in again, so watch this space

I've inboxed you xxx

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

Simple answer...

Because I want to be x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I've never had a relationship. Something must be wrong with me.

It’s that inbetweeners look

Says the guy with the typical fuckboi poses.

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By *riefcase_WankerMan over a year ago

Milton Keynes

"I've never had a relationship. Something must be wrong with me.

It’s that inbetweeners look

Cheeky bugger right? Nicking my style...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I've never had a relationship. Something must be wrong with me.

It’s that inbetweeners look

Says the guy with the typical fuckboi poses. "

It’s all banter

lighten up dude

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I've never had a relationship. Something must be wrong with me.

It’s that inbetweeners look

Says the guy with the typical fuckboi poses.

It’s all banter

lighten up dude"

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By *hortarse69Woman over a year ago

up the valleys ;-)

"I don't fancy the ones that want me.

The ones I fancy only want a fuck.

Yep. This sounds about right.

Yep.

Yep maybe a bit of this and also the last guy I really fell for last year and who I wanted to be with ended up being a lying cheating Knob!

2 years ago for me. Knobs!xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm single because I had my heartbroken two years ago and I'm not looking for a relationship yet because I don't want to have my love and trust thrown back in my face again.

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By *eesideMan over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea

Cos i carnt seem to myself a girlfriend or sumone that's intreated.

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By *irginieWoman over a year ago

Near Marlborough

"I don't fancy the ones that want me.

The ones I fancy only want a fuck.

Yep. This sounds about right.

Yep.

Yep maybe a bit of this and also the last guy I really fell for last year and who I wanted to be with ended up being a lying cheating Knob!

2 years ago for me. Knobs!xx"

Hey I had one of those too

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/06/18 17:09:33]

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By *ire_bladeMan over a year ago

Manchester

Because I'm ugle

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don't fancy the ones that want me.

The ones I fancy only want a fuck.

Yep. This sounds about right.

Yep.

Yep maybe a bit of this and also the last guy I really fell for last year and who I wanted to be with ended up being a lying cheating Knob!

2 years ago for me. Knobs!xx

Hey I had one of those too

Don’t you think Knob is the perfect word for them!!! Grrrr Anyway better off without them and all that shite

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By *rspecs95Man over a year ago

hayes

"How do people answer that, without making it sound like you're faulty? "

Probably because I normally want to take things further with a mature woman and not one of my own age, can't help wanting a cougar but always get told 'I'm too young for anything other than fun'

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By *ubiousOatcakeMan over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"Is that really a question people ask?"

Unfortunately, yes.

Sometimes it’s a flirty, “I can’t believe you’re not taken.”

In the singles market, it often comes early doors. “Before we get any further, are there any issues I need to know about?”

And then there are the people in relationships. “Why are you failing at life where we have succeeded?”

For me, I could honestly say that it’s by choice, but that doesn’t tell the whole story.

It’s my choice in that it was me who ended all of my relationships. (It’s worth pointing out, that’s a long way away from having had a relationship with every girl I’ve hoped to have a relationship.) There have been a few girls who wanted to settle down, marriage, kids. However, I would have been settling. I didn’t love them enough. I was in the relationship through habit, and called it a day. They deserved better than a guy settling for them. (Or, if they were settling for me, they deserved somebody else who would settle for them.)

However, if I had the choice of being single, or being with a woman who rocked my world, and I knew I rocked hers, I’d pick that. The difficulty is that I’m not sure how many more 3-18 month relationships I can be bothered going through on the off chance that what I’m looking for even exists.

Atropos, in order to answer the question in your specific case, we’d probably need to hear what you think the answer is, even if you think it makes you sound undateable.

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By *ucky78Woman over a year ago

liverpool

I seem to be the one before they settle down and marry

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By *egs11ABCWoman over a year ago

Aberdeen

Because since my marriage ended I had 2 long term relaitionships with guys who cdnt keep it in their pants and sd it was only sex, even tho they had a raving nymphomaniac as a partner. Who figures obviously is my fault. x

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By *rspecs95Man over a year ago

hayes

"I seem to be the one before they settle down and marry

Never give up just means they weren't right for you, I've stopped looking for 'the one' I figure if it's meant to be we will find each other by accident... That's what I tell myself when I'm lonely anyway lol

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By *ucky78Woman over a year ago

liverpool

"I seem to be the one before they settle down and marry

Best stay on here and keep playing then

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By *ddibleMan over a year ago

Exeter Bristol Salisbury

"How do people answer that, without making it sound like you're faulty? "

Because Fab relationships suit my life better

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"But in my situation where I would very much like to be taken off the shelf, how would I answer it?"

I’ve looked at your pictures it would have to be pretty bad to put any man off

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well this is going to be a long answer.

Secondly, there is this terrible thing where it seems that anyone I am interested in holds no interest for me, or vice versa.

I hope things get a little better soon! X

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well this is going to be a long answer.

Secondly, there is this terrible thing where it seems that anyone I am interested in holds no interest for me, or vice versa.

Right there with you, mate. Just got to trust we'll get through it.

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By *s_macWoman over a year ago

Traffic land

A mish mash of reasons. I’m genuinely enjoying my freedom, not having to worry about anyone else. I can focus on my kids and then when I have free time, I can do exactly what I want with it. I’ve not met anyone since I separated that I’ve wanted to pursue anything with and probably the whole underlying thing is I’m not yet prepared to open myself up to a situation where I might end up being hurt.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I left my ex for a variety of bloody good reasons that I struggled hard to accommodate but eventually realised it was just best for everyone if I took the courageous step and left.

I would appreciate it if singles were clear as to whether they left or got left. Why? Because I don't want to date someone who was left

Hahaha, you cannot be serious!? I think it's about time you had a word with someone about narcissism.....

I did... I had a talk with the God within me

My main thing is that I don't knowingly want to date a cheat. I just don't think I could ever trust them "
Been cheated on with both of my long term relationships.i won't trust anyone again that's me done

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I’m not good at reading other people so I’m never sure if they are flirting with me so I don’t find any opportunities

I also enjoy my own space a little too much

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Fear of emotional commitment and rejection

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By *ubiousOatcakeMan over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"I seem to be the one before they settle down and marry

Right there with you! I know of at least five of my significant exes who married the guy after me. That suggests to me that they were settling for me (the odds of all of them finding another ‘the one’ right after me are astronomical). Four had kids, of which three then got divorced. Another got divorced without having kids. I avoided all of that...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My dad actually asked me if I'm a lesbian now. He was serious.

All because I've chosen to stay single for 3 years now.

I was moaned at for being with a bad boy, I was moaned at for moving away with an ex and I'm moaned at for being Single! Haha I can't win!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Been single almost 10 years didn't realise there was anything wrong with it. Still not actively looking to date either. Though I would just be honest about how long I've been single, what's the point in starting a relationship on a lie.

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