Usually the latter. But when I first came on here a few years back my first two meets were literally. One message, pop round and fuck. Admittedly it wasn’t the most sensual sex but fun nevertheless

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *oodnitegirlWoman over a year ago

Yorkshire

I’ve done both. Totally different scenarios I think

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I usually like to chat for a while but I have also met on the same day after just a few messages have been exchanged. Catch me in a really horny mood and you just never know!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Either if I feel comfortable with the person

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Done both

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Not for me, rather chat first

I won't even meet for sex before a social first.

Went to a womans house before a social once and it went from bad to worse, never again

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Not for me, rather chat first

I won't even meet for sex before a social first.

Went to a womans house before a social once and it went from bad to worse, never again"

Depends how hot you are for the other person though surely??

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Is anybody actually up for them on here or does everybody talk for weeks on end"

id be up for one in the right circumstances... but they rarely happen here iv found

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If i'm on here i'm usually just relaxed in my house.. it would take ages to then get ready and get to the destination. Rather set a date in advance

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Spontaneous meets, but pub / coffee bar first, to make sure there is a spark on both sides.

I have stopped seeking planned meets, after so many let downs, even once sitting outside the couple's house, after an hour's drive.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *orticiaWoman over a year ago

Wirral

"Not for me, rather chat first

I won't even meet for sex before a social first.

Went to a womans house before a social once and it went from bad to worse, never again

Depends how hot you are for the other person though surely??"

Online perceptions of people can be massively different than the reality!!

I’ve had socials turn into a bit more in the past when there has been that chemistry, and I’ve met people in clubs who were great online & like talking to a brick wall in the flesh.

Bad chemistry usually leads to bad sex, so a social is a no brainier to me!

This is why my preference is playing in clubs. You meet, chat, click & away you go!!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *mmacdheelsTV/TS over a year ago

France, And sometimes in

"Is anybody actually up for them on here or does everybody talk for weeks on end"

Have done both. I think the most spontaneous was being "in bed together" within 1hour of the first contact. But preference is to have some chatting first as that way you can get advance information on things such as likes and dislikes which all helps to make a meet go smoother.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Not for me, rather chat first

I won't even meet for sex before a social first.

Went to a womans house before a social once and it went from bad to worse, never again

Depends how hot you are for the other person though surely??"

People can look and act very differently online compared to in person

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *ananas57Couple over a year ago

lake ariel

I'm horrible at planning things so spontaneous works for me

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *loswingersCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

Always spontaneous for us .

Nothing worse than wasting so much time in chatting and getting to know someone to be let down when it comes to the actual meet . And that happens so much on here now compared to how it was when we started swinging seven years ago .

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For safety purposes most females need a bit of chat. I most certainly wouldn't do a spontaneous meet with a complete stranger XXX"

Seconded

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I did a few when I first joined and luckily they worked out okay. But I won't now, I'm way too cautious and don't trust people.

Social first now and if I'm lucky, second meet for shenanigans.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Bit of both. If I've got time and don't get the serial killer vibe then a quick meet is great.

However having no bloody car and real life stuff means time is limited so chat a bit it is

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *iss.HoneyWoman over a year ago

...

"Not for me, rather chat first

I won't even meet for sex before a social first.

Went to a womans house before a social once and it went from bad to worse, never again

Depends how hot you are for the other person though surely??

People can look and act very differently online compared to in person"

Yes!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We’ll meet at our earliest convenience. But we have to wait for a child free night which happen once every couple of months. So yup spontaneous meets are pretty impossible for us.

Mrs

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Had a couple but they quickly fizzled out. I prefer a chat and a social or two.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Had 1. It was shit in a nutshell.

Had we chatted first it would have been obviouse.

Lesson learnt. Lol

However endless messaging also gets on my nerves. At least commiting to a social would be nice. Its isnt all about sex for us its also about freindships being made.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Add hard to be spontaneous a few times at the start and it had a bad result so now I always insist and chatting and having a social first

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For safety purposes most females need a bit of chat. I most certainly wouldn't do a spontaneous meet with a complete stranger XXX"

Absolutely this, but also working full time and family commitments I can't do spontaneous meets

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I like to have a social first, if nothing else it helps build the anticipation and makes for a better meet.

On a personal level I kind of have to connect with the other person otherwise it can be flat.

Club meets on the other hand are a different animal

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *issmorganWoman over a year ago

Calderdale innit

I don't ever do them

Like to chat and get to know someone a bit first and wouldn't feel comfortable meeting same day or really fast.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *iss_tressWoman over a year ago

London

I'm not inviting total strangers into my home or meet them in a hotel, so spontaneous meets wouldn't be for me.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *iss_tressWoman over a year ago

London

"For safety purposes most females need a bit of chat. I most certainly wouldn't do a spontaneous meet with a complete stranger XXX"

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *iss_tressWoman over a year ago

London

"Not for me, rather chat first

I won't even meet for sex before a social first.

Went to a womans house before a social once and it went from bad to worse, never again"

Yep, I learnt the hard way too. It was embarrassing for both as I felt no sexual attraction, he smelt and sex wasn't happening.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *urvy_J3Woman over a year ago

Bradford

I like to chat first also like to talk on the phone aswel. I don't wait weeks or months, if we have been chatting quite a bit I will meet within a week

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Spontaneous with someone I already know,fantastic. Not a complete stranger I'm afraid

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *iss_tressWoman over a year ago

London

"I like to chat first also like to talk on the phone aswel. I don't wait weeks or months, if we have been chatting quite a bit I will meet within a week "

Me too. Talking is important as one meet looked like Daniel Craig but sounded like Joe Pasquale

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *ara JTV/TS over a year ago

Bristol East

I've had a couple lately.

First one I'd got the bus home from the pub in a somewhat merry state. A chap in the pub, whom I'd noticed on the bus, got off at the same stop and . . . well, he was quickly in my bed.

The second was a chap whom I'd had an on-off message thing going for while.

Out of the blue last night, he tells me he is in my neighbourhood. I'm in the mood, so 5 minutes later he is knocking at my door.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My spontaneous meet:

Me: What are you doing?

Him: nothing no plans, watching tv

Me: let's meet in 1 hr

Him: ok

Me: 45 mins later... I'm leaving the house now..

Him: ooo I thought you were not coming, I've arranged meeting with one couple...

Twat

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/06/18 15:29:15]

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have the attention span of a gnat so spontaneous meets suit me. However, they will always be a social and only after a chat on phone to check if there’s a connection ...

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I also need to chat first... build up a little bit of trust etc

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Ladies have chat to you for while make sure your not pyscho we all how many weird blokes there are in this messed up world of ours

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *unloversCouple over a year ago

rotherham

We like to plan our meets in advance so that we can chat first and get that excitement going ready for the build up

We can’t just meet at the drop of hat so this works for us

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But is putting me off if you chat to a guy for a while he is always up for a meet and when you actually say meet now... oh dear... Mr.Twat coming out

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *apstarMan over a year ago

Harpenden

"But is putting me off if you chat to a guy for a while he is always up for a meet and when you actually say meet now... oh dear... Mr.Twat coming out

Don't give up we arnt all twats

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *rkeb3Man over a year ago

east Lancashire road

oh crap

sometimes chatting too much leads to losing interest in the person u chatting

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"oh crap

sometimes chatting too much leads to losing interest in the person u chatting

Totally agree... some guys don't know when to take a break from texting plus texting over and over again similar stuff... boring...

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Some of the worst horror stories I’ve heard have always been off the back of a quick meet.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Never do a spontaneous meet. I have to like the person I'm fucking and I can only find out if I like them by talking to them.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"oh crap

sometimes chatting too much leads to losing interest in the person u chatting

I'd rather that than be with someone for 5 minutes and regret it.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *apstarMan over a year ago

Harpenden

Would rather chat too somone first .. see if there's a connection and go from there

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *entleman JayMan over a year ago

Wakefield

I’m wracking my brain. I don’t think I’ve ever had a spontaneous meet??

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *apstarMan over a year ago

Harpenden

Ohh I did it once and was the worse hour off my life . She was so moody and had a right face on her

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *iSTARessWoman over a year ago

London

I've done spontaneous and they've been the most disappointing experiences I've had. Felt like I should have charged

Generalising but most women need some mental stimulation before our knickers come off.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Once I was chatting to a guy great banter and connection but on social meet we couldn't connect...

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I would say other than parties club's n group socials,more than half of our meets would be spontaneous

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *rkeb3Man over a year ago

east Lancashire road

"oh crap

sometimes chatting too much leads to losing interest in the person u chatting

I'd rather that than be with someone for 5 minutes and regret it."
so u think it's better spending weeks chatting all the build up u are so excited eager to them u are planning to meet them and they say sorry we can't meet u rather than a 5minu disappointment

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have occasionally.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i love a spontaneous as it usually means all parties are in the mood and less chance of a cancellation

however i need an hour to shower shave trim groom iron a shirt polish shoes etc etc and however long it takes to drive to the meeting place

love it , exciting

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"oh crap

sometimes chatting too much leads to losing interest in the person u chatting

I'd rather that than be with someone for 5 minutes and regret it.so u think it's better spending weeks chatting all the build up u are so excited eager to them u are planning to meet them and they say sorry we can't meet u rather than a 5minu disappointment

Yes the former is better than the latter if it’s not going to be a successful meet. But if we have chatted to someone for some weeks and are still keen to meet, then I would assume the meet would be successful. Admittedly we’ve never attempted a last minute meet, but I would think there would be a higher chance of it not being a successful meet, on the basis that we haven’t been through the chatting phase which is necessary to out incompatible matches.

Mrs

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"oh crap

sometimes chatting too much leads to losing interest in the person u chatting

Agree. I prefer to meet within a week of first chatting.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list