FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > When to message again...or not?
When to message again...or not?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So you find someone you like, profile is loveley, honest messages in chat,they reply, things look good then nothing....
Do you message again after a few days?
Wink in hope?
Assume no interest and move on?
I appreciate that women and couples have full inboxes but what's the acceptable social practice?
Many thanks in advance.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If they have been replying but suddenly stop then I would give it a few days and message again, they may have got busy and forgot to reply.
I'd only do it once though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You'd have to look at the replies really. Are they one word answers, do they ask questions back, do they shut conversation down with no easy opener to reply to, do they ever initiate the first message, have they been active online a lot since you last messaged them, did your last message have something obvious to reply to?
Need more info! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You'd have to look at the replies really. Are they one word answers, do they ask questions back, do they shut conversation down with no easy opener to reply to, do they ever initiate the first message, have they been active online a lot since you last messaged them, did your last message have something obvious to reply to?
Need more info!"
She’s thorough, I’ll give her that. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thank you, obviously not going to share private coversations but the messages have been 2 way, not one word answers and no i didn't feel they'd shut the conversation down but i suspect life gets hectic for people (i know mine is).
I ask as i know pushy is a turn off but flip side is initial conversations are hard to guage.
Anyway thanks for your replies, appreciate the honesty
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"So you find someone you like, profile is loveley, honest messages in chat,they reply, things look good then nothing....
Do you message again after a few days?
Wink in hope?
Assume no interest and move on?
I appreciate that women and couples have full inboxes but what's the acceptable social practice?
Many thanks in advance.
"
Welcome to ghosting, it actually has a name lol  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Put 20 or more profiles on your hotlist.
Don't have to be interested in them
Wait for the profile you fancy is latest on.
Then you know they on line.
Message I'm sure you will get a reply.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Perhaps they were just being polite by replying. Was the last message read?
I know if I'm online and I've read a message of someone I'm interested in I'll reply. If I'm not online or haven't seen the message or even read it but can't reply at that exact moment I'll mark it as unread. I wouldn't read a message (that warranted a response) and not reply.
Last guy I had sex with from here he messaged, I replied he messaged again I replied and said let's have a chat, he sent his number we had a chat, I had him inside me 21 hours later. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have conversations with people where we dont message for a few weeks but when we do we just carry on as before..
Mind you Im not that arsed about whether a meet is on the cards or not so there is definitely no pressure |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Even though I very much want to message again I don't as I assume the lady in question doesn't want any more messages from me, alas!  "
That's what i have been doing too mainly because i assume they are not interested and don't want to pester people but do just wonder if a quick single message might be worth the risk. |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
"Even though I very much want to message again I don't as I assume the lady in question doesn't want any more messages from me, alas!
That's what i have been doing too mainly because i assume they are not interested and don't want to pester people but do just wonder if a quick single message might be worth the risk."
To both of you, that might not be the case, if I have a lot on in my life, I go to bed having answered their latest message, they then reply when I am fast asleep, I haven't time in the morning to reply as too busy getting ready for work, by evening I have totally forgotten it was there, if I don't hear from them again I automatically think they have found someone else to chat to, all quite logical to me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I text once, if the message has been read with no reply, I don't text or wink again asI don't like doing a monologue and I have too much pride to be driven by my sexual drives and keep texting someone who doesn't seem to want to reply in order to get laid. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have conversations with people where we dont message for a few weeks but when we do we just carry on as before..
Mind you Im not that arsed about whether a meet is on the cards or not so there is definitely no pressure "
I do the same pretty much |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Even though I very much want to message again I don't as I assume the lady in question doesn't want any more messages from me, alas!
That's what i have been doing too mainly because i assume they are not interested and don't want to pester people but do just wonder if a quick single message might be worth the risk."
Probably is some might want that little bit of a chase while others will think you're pestering! To bring in another thread, "you pays your money, you take your choice"  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I say one more message wont hurt. I miss messages at times. "
Thank you, i suspect us blokeys don't realise the volume of traffic the women here get. I'm sure it's easy to lose track of all the messages incoming.
X x |
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"Even though I very much want to message again I don't as I assume the lady in question doesn't want any more messages from me, alas!
That's what i have been doing too mainly because i assume they are not interested and don't want to pester people but do just wonder if a quick single message might be worth the risk."
The way forward is to set your calendar to remind you to send one message per day at the same time each day to remind her you are still around. She may have forgotten you or is busy sifting through 100s of messages.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Even though I very much want to message again I don't as I assume the lady in question doesn't want any more messages from me, alas!
That's what i have been doing too mainly because i assume they are not interested and don't want to pester people but do just wonder if a quick single message might be worth the risk.
The way forward is to set your calendar to remind you to send one message per day at the same time each day to remind her you are still around. She may have forgotten you or is busy sifting through 100s of messages.
"
I'm not that organised....i'm a man
Lol
Thank you though |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Definitely send a message after a few days saying 'Did you still want to chat?'
Life takes over sometimes and people don't wait but sometimes I wish they had!  "
Thank you Frisky_Mare, ace profile name btw x x |
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