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Testing Rubi
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What’s the difference between a penis and a sausage roll?"
Erm. There’s quite a lot.
A penis is a male sexual organ and a sausage roll is an item of food. A penis is made out of muscles, skin, blood vessels, veins, tissue etc, and a sausage roll is generally made from some sort of meat in a pastry type substance.
Stupid question if you ask me. |
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"What’s the difference between a penis and a sausage roll?
Erm. There’s quite a lot.
A penis is a male sexual organ and a sausage roll is an item of food. A penis is made out of muscles, skin, blood vessels, veins, tissue etc, and a sausage roll is generally made from some sort of meat in a pastry type substance.
Stupid question if you ask me. "
It’s an attempt at a joke! |
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"I like penis?
You are meant to say “I don’t know”
( indulge me)
I don't know
Would you like to come on a picnic?
But I don't like sausage rolls  "
Come on “I’m struggling here “.
Have you ever played the ‘nuts game ‘? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What’s the difference between a penis and a sausage roll?
Erm. There’s quite a lot.
A penis is a male sexual organ and a sausage roll is an item of food. A penis is made out of muscles, skin, blood vessels, veins, tissue etc, and a sausage roll is generally made from some sort of meat in a pastry type substance.
Stupid question if you ask me. "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I like penis?
You are meant to say “I don’t know”
( indulge me)
I don't know
Would you like to come on a picnic?
But I don't like sausage rolls "
Well come round here and suck my cock, let him go on the picnic on his own 
You can't get away with a scripted joke on here...
Knock knock |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I like penis?
You are meant to say “I don’t know”
( indulge me)
I don't know
Would you like to come on a picnic?
But I don't like sausage rolls
Well come round here and suck my cock, let him go on the picnic on his own
You can't get away with a scripted joke on here...
Knock knock"
No thanks. I don’t want any pegs or dish towels. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I like penis?
You are meant to say “I don’t know”
( indulge me)
I don't know
Would you like to come on a picnic?
But I don't like sausage rolls
Well come round here and suck my cock, let him go on the picnic on his own
You can't get away with a scripted joke on here...
Knock knock
No thanks. I don’t want any pegs or dish towels. "
Oh well, will get to keep lucky Heather to myself then  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What’s the difference between a penis and a sausage roll?
Erm. There’s quite a lot.
A penis is a male sexual organ and a sausage roll is an item of food. A penis is made out of muscles, skin, blood vessels, veins, tissue etc, and a sausage roll is generally made from some sort of meat in a pastry type substance.
Stupid question if you ask me. "
most sausage rolls ate the same ingredients then only wrapped in pastry  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
" You know you could have this conversation via pm? 
He can't he's too old to mail me
Thanks Rubi - nuts game?
What's the nuts game?
What are nuts on the wall?"
A kinky sub that's been stapled there by a sadistic Domme? |
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" You know you could have this conversation via pm?
He can't he's too old to mail me
Thanks Rubi - nuts game?
What's the nuts game?
What are nuts on the wall?
A kinky sub that's been stapled there by a sadistic Domme?"
No (help me) Walnuts! What do you call nuts on your chest? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
" You know you could have this conversation via pm?
He can't he's too old to mail me
Thanks Rubi - nuts game?
What's the nuts game?
What are nuts on the wall?
A kinky sub that's been stapled there by a sadistic Domme?
No (help me) Walnuts! What do you call nuts on your chest?"
Tit wank? |
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" You know you could have this conversation via pm?
He can't he's too old to mail me
Thanks Rubi - nuts game?
What's the nuts game?
What are nuts on the wall?
A kinky sub that's been stapled there by a sadistic Domme?
No (help me) Walnuts! What do you call nuts on your chest?
Tit wank?"
No but very good. I’m fucking glad we have never met at a party, I’m putting out my comedy gold here and getting nowhere!
Nuts on your chest - chestnuts!
Nuts on your chin? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
" You know you could have this conversation via pm?
He can't he's too old to mail me
Thanks Rubi - nuts game?
What's the nuts game?
What are nuts on the wall?
A kinky sub that's been stapled there by a sadistic Domme?
No (help me) Walnuts! What do you call nuts on your chest?
Tit wank?
No but very good. I’m fucking glad we have never met at a party, I’m putting out my comedy gold here and getting nowhere!
Nuts on your chest - chestnuts!
Nuts on your chin?"
Blow job? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There's 37 seconds I'll never get back
I know that’s something you’re used to hearing!
Welcome Blanche - where have you been all evening?"
Work and then drinks with some work colleagues to try and distract me being melancholic. Now traveling home to ruminate about life.
I’ve had a cider. I may be filthy imminently. |
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"There's 37 seconds I'll never get back
I know that’s something you’re used to hearing!
Welcome Blanche - where have you been all evening?
Work and then drinks with some work colleagues to try and distract me being melancholic. Now traveling home to ruminate about life.
I’ve had a cider. I may be filthy imminently. "
I kiked you loads. Enjoy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There's 37 seconds I'll never get back
I know that’s something you’re used to hearing!
Welcome Blanche - where have you been all evening?"
Are you not able to message Blanche either? |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There's 37 seconds I'll never get back
I know that’s something you’re used to hearing!
Welcome Blanche - where have you been all evening?
Work and then drinks with some work colleagues to try and distract me being melancholic. Now traveling home to ruminate about life.
I’ve had a cider. I may be filthy imminently.
I kiked you loads. Enjoy. "
I’ve been tending a broken heart. Now I have a cider and have given up on love, I’m ready for your filth. Once I’m out the taxi I am going IN!
And will be ready for debauchery.
Also, I  you x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There's 37 seconds I'll never get back
I know that’s something you’re used to hearing!
Welcome Blanche - where have you been all evening?
Are you not able to message Blanche either? "
|
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" You know you could have this conversation via pm?
He can't he's too old to mail me
Thanks Rubi - nuts game?
What's the nuts game?
What are nuts on the wall?
A kinky sub that's been stapled there by a sadistic Domme?
No (help me) Walnuts! What do you call nuts on your chest?
Tit wank?
No but very good. I’m fucking glad we have never met at a party, I’m putting out my comedy gold here and getting nowhere!
Nuts on your chest - chestnuts!
Nuts on your chin?
Blow job?"
It doesn’t work when written. Oral is best. Nuts on your chin - my cock in your mouth. I’m quite good fun at parties - honest! Even though I’m too old! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
" You know you could have this conversation via pm?
He can't he's too old to mail me
Thanks Rubi - nuts game?
What's the nuts game?
What are nuts on the wall?
A kinky sub that's been stapled there by a sadistic Domme?
No (help me) Walnuts! What do you call nuts on your chest?
Tit wank?
No but very good. I’m fucking glad we have never met at a party, I’m putting out my comedy gold here and getting nowhere!
Nuts on your chest - chestnuts!
Nuts on your chin?
Blow job?
It doesn’t work when written. Oral is best. Nuts on your chin - my cock in your mouth. I’m quite good fun at parties - honest! Even though I’m too old!"
You're not too old for parties. We had a party for my gran's 80th. |
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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
"There's 37 seconds I'll never get back
I know that’s something you’re used to hearing!
Welcome Blanche - where have you been all evening?
Work and then drinks with some work colleagues to try and distract me being melancholic. Now traveling home to ruminate about life.
I’ve had a cider. I may be filthy imminently.
I kiked you loads. Enjoy.
I’ve been tending a broken heart. Now I have a cider and have given up on love, I’m ready for your filth. Once I’m out the taxi I am going IN!
And will be ready for debauchery.
Also, I you x"
Come to ours we'll help you with the broken heart,cheese and booze then the debauchery  |
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"Op are you trying to procure a meet with your jokes?
No not at all. I was just trying to liven up a boring forum evening. It all seems to come to life at 21:00 though. "
That's when we put the kids to bed. |
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"Op are you trying to procure a meet with your jokes?
No not at all. I was just trying to liven up a boring forum evening. It all seems to come to life at 21:00 though.
That's when we put the kids to bed. "
Of course. Mine are still up. Mind you, they are 24 and 26 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There's 37 seconds I'll never get back
I know that’s something you’re used to hearing!
Welcome Blanche - where have you been all evening?
Work and then drinks with some work colleagues to try and distract me being melancholic. Now traveling home to ruminate about life.
I’ve had a cider. I may be filthy imminently.
I kiked you loads. Enjoy.
I’ve been tending a broken heart. Now I have a cider and have given up on love, I’m ready for your filth. Once I’m out the taxi I am going IN!
And will be ready for debauchery.
Also, I you x
Come to ours we'll help you with the broken heart,cheese and booze then the debauchery "
Oooh that’s an offer!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Op are you trying to procure a meet with your jokes?
No not at all. I was just trying to liven up a boring forum evening. It all seems to come to life at 21:00 though.
That's when we put the kids to bed. "
Can you put me to bed, please? |
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|
By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
"There's 37 seconds I'll never get back
I know that’s something you’re used to hearing!
Welcome Blanche - where have you been all evening?
Work and then drinks with some work colleagues to try and distract me being melancholic. Now traveling home to ruminate about life.
I’ve had a cider. I may be filthy imminently.
I kiked you loads. Enjoy.
I’ve been tending a broken heart. Now I have a cider and have given up on love, I’m ready for your filth. Once I’m out the taxi I am going IN!
And will be ready for debauchery.
Also, I you x
Come to ours we'll help you with the broken heart,cheese and booze then the debauchery
Oooh that’s an offer!! "
And we still have the large dog cage for Jim |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
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"There's 37 seconds I'll never get back
I know that’s something you’re used to hearing!
Welcome Blanche - where have you been all evening?
Work and then drinks with some work colleagues to try and distract me being melancholic. Now traveling home to ruminate about life.
I’ve had a cider. I may be filthy imminently.
I kiked you loads. Enjoy.
I’ve been tending a broken heart. Now I have a cider and have given up on love, I’m ready for your filth. Once I’m out the taxi I am going IN!
And will be ready for debauchery.
Also, I you x
Come to ours we'll help you with the broken heart,cheese and booze then the debauchery
Oooh that’s an offer!! "
I fancy a bumming. What have you got to offer me? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
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"Op are you trying to procure a meet with your jokes?
No not at all. I was just trying to liven up a boring forum evening. It all seems to come to life at 21:00 though.
That's when we put the kids to bed.
Can you put me to bed, please? "
Ok. But I'd need your permission to fuck you again while you're asleep. |
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|
By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
"There's 37 seconds I'll never get back
I know that’s something you’re used to hearing!
Welcome Blanche - where have you been all evening?
Work and then drinks with some work colleagues to try and distract me being melancholic. Now traveling home to ruminate about life.
I’ve had a cider. I may be filthy imminently.
I kiked you loads. Enjoy.
I’ve been tending a broken heart. Now I have a cider and have given up on love, I’m ready for your filth. Once I’m out the taxi I am going IN!
And will be ready for debauchery.
Also, I you x
Come to ours we'll help you with the broken heart,cheese and booze then the debauchery
Oooh that’s an offer!!
I fancy a bumming. What have you got to offer me? "
I've a few strap ons if that helps
|
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There's 37 seconds I'll never get back
I know that’s something you’re used to hearing!
Welcome Blanche - where have you been all evening?
Work and then drinks with some work colleagues to try and distract me being melancholic. Now traveling home to ruminate about life.
I’ve had a cider. I may be filthy imminently.
I kiked you loads. Enjoy.
I’ve been tending a broken heart. Now I have a cider and have given up on love, I’m ready for your filth. Once I’m out the taxi I am going IN!
And will be ready for debauchery.
Also, I you x
Come to ours we'll help you with the broken heart,cheese and booze then the debauchery
Oooh that’s an offer!!
And we still have the large dog cage for Jim "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There's 37 seconds I'll never get back
I know that’s something you’re used to hearing!
Welcome Blanche - where have you been all evening?
Work and then drinks with some work colleagues to try and distract me being melancholic. Now traveling home to ruminate about life.
I’ve had a cider. I may be filthy imminently.
I kiked you loads. Enjoy.
I’ve been tending a broken heart. Now I have a cider and have given up on love, I’m ready for your filth. Once I’m out the taxi I am going IN!
And will be ready for debauchery.
Also, I you x
Come to ours we'll help you with the broken heart,cheese and booze then the debauchery
Oooh that’s an offer!!
I fancy a bumming. What have you got to offer me? "
Me? Or Red? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
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"There's 37 seconds I'll never get back
I know that’s something you’re used to hearing!
Welcome Blanche - where have you been all evening?
Work and then drinks with some work colleagues to try and distract me being melancholic. Now traveling home to ruminate about life.
I’ve had a cider. I may be filthy imminently.
I kiked you loads. Enjoy.
I’ve been tending a broken heart. Now I have a cider and have given up on love, I’m ready for your filth. Once I’m out the taxi I am going IN!
And will be ready for debauchery.
Also, I you x
Come to ours we'll help you with the broken heart,cheese and booze then the debauchery
Oooh that’s an offer!!
I fancy a bumming. What have you got to offer me?
Me? Or Red?"
Either or. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Op are you trying to procure a meet with your jokes?
No not at all. I was just trying to liven up a boring forum evening. It all seems to come to life at 21:00 though.
That's when we put the kids to bed.
Can you put me to bed, please?
Ok. But I'd need your permission to fuck you again while you're asleep. "
You know full well you have permission as I’d fall asleep as a result of you fucking me anyhow, so consent to fuck is always consent to fuck me asleep.
 |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There's 37 seconds I'll never get back
I know that’s something you’re used to hearing!
Welcome Blanche - where have you been all evening?
Work and then drinks with some work colleagues to try and distract me being melancholic. Now traveling home to ruminate about life.
I’ve had a cider. I may be filthy imminently.
I kiked you loads. Enjoy.
I’ve been tending a broken heart. Now I have a cider and have given up on love, I’m ready for your filth. Once I’m out the taxi I am going IN!
And will be ready for debauchery.
Also, I you x
Come to ours we'll help you with the broken heart,cheese and booze then the debauchery
Oooh that’s an offer!!
I fancy a bumming. What have you got to offer me?
Me? Or Red?
Either or."
Both. Simultaneously. |
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|
By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
"There's 37 seconds I'll never get back
I know that’s something you’re used to hearing!
Welcome Blanche - where have you been all evening?
Work and then drinks with some work colleagues to try and distract me being melancholic. Now traveling home to ruminate about life.
I’ve had a cider. I may be filthy imminently.
I kiked you loads. Enjoy.
I’ve been tending a broken heart. Now I have a cider and have given up on love, I’m ready for your filth. Once I’m out the taxi I am going IN!
And will be ready for debauchery.
Also, I you x
Come to ours we'll help you with the broken heart,cheese and booze then the debauchery
Oooh that’s an offer!!
I fancy a bumming. What have you got to offer me?
Me? Or Red?
Either or.
Both. Simultaneously."
Oh that's a great shout |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Come to ours we'll help you with the broken heart,cheese and booze then the debauchery
Oooh that’s an offer!!
I fancy a bumming. What have you got to offer me?
Me? Or Red?
Either or.
Both. Simultaneously.
Oh that's a great shout "
Word. |
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"Op are you trying to procure a meet with your jokes?
No not at all. I was just trying to liven up a boring forum evening. It all seems to come to life at 21:00 though.
That's when we put the kids to bed.
Can you put me to bed, please?
Ok. But I'd need your permission to fuck you again while you're asleep.
You know full well you have permission as I’d fall asleep as a result of you fucking me anyhow, so consent to fuck is always consent to fuck me asleep.
"
Urgh! It's gonna be messy! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Op are you trying to procure a meet with your jokes?
No not at all. I was just trying to liven up a boring forum evening. It all seems to come to life at 21:00 though.
That's when we put the kids to bed.
Can you put me to bed, please?
Ok. But I'd need your permission to fuck you again while you're asleep.
You know full well you have permission as I’d fall asleep as a result of you fucking me anyhow, so consent to fuck is always consent to fuck me asleep.
Urgh! It's gonna be messy! "
I’ve only a few years of fertility left, hurry the fuck up! |
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"Op are you trying to procure a meet with your jokes?
No not at all. I was just trying to liven up a boring forum evening. It all seems to come to life at 21:00 though.
That's when we put the kids to bed.
Can you put me to bed, please?
Ok. But I'd need your permission to fuck you again while you're asleep.
You know full well you have permission as I’d fall asleep as a result of you fucking me anyhow, so consent to fuck is always consent to fuck me asleep.
Urgh! It's gonna be messy!
I’ve only a few years of fertility left, hurry the fuck up! "
As I started the thread - can I watch? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Op are you trying to procure a meet with your jokes?
No not at all. I was just trying to liven up a boring forum evening. It all seems to come to life at 21:00 though.
That's when we put the kids to bed.
Can you put me to bed, please?
Ok. But I'd need your permission to fuck you again while you're asleep.
You know full well you have permission as I’d fall asleep as a result of you fucking me anyhow, so consent to fuck is always consent to fuck me asleep.
Urgh! It's gonna be messy!
I’ve only a few years of fertility left, hurry the fuck up!
As I started the thread - can I watch?"
Only if Rubi let’s you. |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Op are you trying to procure a meet with your jokes?
No not at all. I was just trying to liven up a boring forum evening. It all seems to come to life at 21:00 though.
That's when we put the kids to bed.
Can you put me to bed, please?
Ok. But I'd need your permission to fuck you again while you're asleep.
You know full well you have permission as I’d fall asleep as a result of you fucking me anyhow, so consent to fuck is always consent to fuck me asleep.
Urgh! It's gonna be messy!
I’ve only a few years of fertility left, hurry the fuck up!
As I started the thread - can I watch?
Only if Rubi let’s you. "
Lets* |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Op are you trying to procure a meet with your jokes?
No not at all. I was just trying to liven up a boring forum evening. It all seems to come to life at 21:00 though.
That's when we put the kids to bed.
Can you put me to bed, please?
Ok. But I'd need your permission to fuck you again while you're asleep.
You know full well you have permission as I’d fall asleep as a result of you fucking me anyhow, so consent to fuck is always consent to fuck me asleep.
Urgh! It's gonna be messy!
I’ve only a few years of fertility left, hurry the fuck up!
As I started the thread - can I watch?
Only if Rubi let’s you. "
No |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Op are you trying to procure a meet with your jokes?
No not at all. I was just trying to liven up a boring forum evening. It all seems to come to life at 21:00 though.
That's when we put the kids to bed.
Can you put me to bed, please?
Ok. But I'd need your permission to fuck you again while you're asleep.
You know full well you have permission as I’d fall asleep as a result of you fucking me anyhow, so consent to fuck is always consent to fuck me asleep.
Urgh! It's gonna be messy!
I’ve only a few years of fertility left, hurry the fuck up!
As I started the thread - can I watch?
Only if Rubi let’s you.
No "
Sorry, OP |
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"Op are you trying to procure a meet with your jokes?
No not at all. I was just trying to liven up a boring forum evening. It all seems to come to life at 21:00 though.
That's when we put the kids to bed.
Can you put me to bed, please?
Ok. But I'd need your permission to fuck you again while you're asleep.
You know full well you have permission as I’d fall asleep as a result of you fucking me anyhow, so consent to fuck is always consent to fuck me asleep.
Urgh! It's gonna be messy!
I’ve only a few years of fertility left, hurry the fuck up!
As I started the thread - can I watch?"
Nobody wants to see my skinny ass in action. I can assure you. |
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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
"Op are you trying to procure a meet with your jokes?
No not at all. I was just trying to liven up a boring forum evening. It all seems to come to life at 21:00 though.
That's when we put the kids to bed.
Can you put me to bed, please?
Ok. But I'd need your permission to fuck you again while you're asleep.
You know full well you have permission as I’d fall asleep as a result of you fucking me anyhow, so consent to fuck is always consent to fuck me asleep.
Urgh! It's gonna be messy!
I’ve only a few years of fertility left, hurry the fuck up!
As I started the thread - can I watch?
Nobody wants to see my skinny ass in action. I can assure you. "
Oh I don't know about that  |
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