FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > And THAT'S why we don't respond and instead delete/block
And THAT'S why we don't respond and instead delete/block
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A bloke messages. It's polite so we check him out.
Unfortunately he's too close to home (we're not looking for anyone too close).
We politely thank him for getting in touch but explain we're not considering anyone too close.
We then get the follow on messsge explaining that he's not actually that close and actually lives further away than his profile says.
Seriously lads, can you be surprised thst you don't get responses and get blocked? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I did the same thing to a couple where I told them they were too far for me to go on a daytime meet (60+ miles away),so they said they could come to me but I don't accommodate..
truth is if you'e not that bothered you block people for any little thing... I know I do |
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"I did the same thing to a couple where I told them they were too far for me to go on a daytime meet (60+ miles away),so they said they could come to me but I don't accommodate..
truth is if you'e not that bothered you block people for any little thing... I know I do"
Yup. It seems people are so desperate that when they DO get a response, even a 'thanks but no thanks' they pounce like a drowning man clinging to a piece of passing driftwood.
The problem is the desperation is anything but attractive, and the lies they tell in desperation are little more than pathetic.
Just delete and block. Polite refusal is pointless. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have our location set around 40 miles away from where we are.
Not all that far fetched really. "
As do I.
There's also no such place as Stormhold, unfortunately. |
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"We have our location set around 40 miles away from where we are.
Not all that far fetched really.
As do I.
There's also no such place as Stormhold, unfortunately. "
Not even in literature? ... it sounds like there should be such a place... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have our location set around 40 miles away from where we are.
Not all that far fetched really.
As do I.
There's also no such place as Stormhold, unfortunately.
Not even in literature? ... it sounds like there should be such a place..."
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sadly some men on here are just asshats, fortunately there are some really lovely guys to.
Yup. And we have a few we get on really well with. But the others..."
It's enough to unleash the flying monkies  |
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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago
Slough Windsor ish |
"A bloke messages. It's polite so we check him out.
Unfortunately he's too close to home (we're not looking for anyone too close).
We politely thank him for getting in touch but explain we're not considering anyone too close.
We then get the follow on messsge explaining that he's not actually that close and actually lives further away than his profile says.
Seriously lads, can you be surprised thst you don't get responses and get blocked?"
I dont see the problem here... lots have very vague locations on their profile, he was simply clarifying that he wasn't as close as you thought.
Obviously you must block or reply to whoever you choose but I wouldn't say this gentleman deserves to have a thread started blaming him for the reason you block not reply.
|
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"A bloke messages. It's polite so we check him out.
Unfortunately he's too close to home (we're not looking for anyone too close).
We politely thank him for getting in touch but explain we're not considering anyone too close.
We then get the follow on messsge explaining that he's not actually that close and actually lives further away than his profile says.
Seriously lads, can you be surprised thst you don't get responses and get blocked?
I dont see the problem here... lots have very vague locations on their profile, he was simply clarifying that he wasn't as close as you thought.
Obviously you must block or reply to whoever you choose but I wouldn't say this gentleman deserves to have a thread started blaming him for the reason you block not reply.
"
Well two reasons. 1. If he lies about location what else is he lying about? 2. The desperation. We want confident men.
And I never said we blame him for the reason we block (read the original post again if in doubt), the thread is using him as illustration of why we have adopted a strategy of delete/block for some time. |
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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago
Slough Windsor ish |
"A bloke messages. It's polite so we check him out.
Unfortunately he's too close to home (we're not looking for anyone too close).
We politely thank him for getting in touch but explain we're not considering anyone too close.
We then get the follow on messsge explaining that he's not actually that close and actually lives further away than his profile says.
Seriously lads, can you be surprised thst you don't get responses and get blocked?
I dont see the problem here... lots have very vague locations on their profile, he was simply clarifying that he wasn't as close as you thought.
Obviously you must block or reply to whoever you choose but I wouldn't say this gentleman deserves to have a thread started blaming him for the reason you block not reply.
Well two reasons. 1. If he lies about location what else is he lying about? 2. The desperation. We want confident men.
And I never said we blame him for the reason we block (read the original post again if in doubt), the thread is using him as illustration of why we have adopted a strategy of delete/block for some time."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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People on here men mostly not always though should accept NO Thanks and then do what i do thankyou for your reply and either just like pics or just block them to avoid further headache to them and me |
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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago
Slough Windsor ish |
"A bloke messages. It's polite so we check him out.
Unfortunately he's too close to home (we're not looking for anyone too close).
We politely thank him for getting in touch but explain we're not considering anyone too close.
We then get the follow on messsge explaining that he's not actually that close and actually lives further away than his profile says.
Seriously lads, can you be surprised thst you don't get responses and get blocked?
I dont see the problem here... lots have very vague locations on their profile, he was simply clarifying that he wasn't as close as you thought.
Obviously you must block or reply to whoever you choose but I wouldn't say this gentleman deserves to have a thread started blaming him for the reason you block not reply.
Well two reasons. 1. If he lies about location what else is he lying about? 2. The desperation. We want confident men.
And I never said we blame him for the reason we block (read the original post again if in doubt), the thread is using him as illustration of why we have adopted a strategy of delete/block for some time."
In answer to reason 1.... you have South Wales set as your location, is that ALL of South Wales? We have Slough Windsor Heathrow ish... thats another large area, maybe he didnt put him home town to maintain some discretion?
Reason 2... was it desperate to clarify his actual locatikn? Be flattered he was attracted enough to disclose his actual location.
I still can't see it as an illustration of why people dont reply or block because he hasn't really done anything wrong.
Like I said, you are free to conduct your profile how you see fit... if you found his second message warrants a block thats fine but imagine if he is now reading this forum?
I think Id feel pretty crap if my messages had caused a couple to start a thread about them.
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
The bottom line here is for all people to be open about what they both post on their profiles and messages.
Manners cost nothing; it could be said of Honesty too.
My approaches are polite & open minded. I watch for the signals in return. If I don't get a reply, I take it on the chin and make notes not to msg again.
But I receive regular responses from those I have messaged, who say "Thanks but no thanks" and compliment me on my style of approach.
If I get positive feedback, I thank them!
Stay polite & positive; it works! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP it's your profile and your messages so you can do whatever you want.
However this does appear to be simply another man bashing thread..."he's desperate" for daring to clarify his location. It's not like your location is that specific!
So having traduced him, adversely represented his character for doing exactly what you are doing regarding specific locations, blocked him, and had a forum rant about said person,....
have you considered looking in a mirror?
I'm rather wondering who's behaviour in this matter is the more appalling..
Oh and that smell... yeah I notice it a lot on single guy bashing threads. Did you stand in something unpleasant |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"A bloke messages. It's polite so we check him out.
Unfortunately he's too close to home (we're not looking for anyone too close).
We politely thank him for getting in touch but explain we're not considering anyone too close.
We then get the follow on messsge explaining that he's not actually that close and actually lives further away than his profile says.
Seriously lads, can you be surprised thst you don't get responses and get blocked?
I dont see the problem here... lots have very vague locations on their profile, he was simply clarifying that he wasn't as close as you thought.
Obviously you must block or reply to whoever you choose but I wouldn't say this gentleman deserves to have a thread started blaming him for the reason you block not reply.
Well two reasons. 1. If he lies about location what else is he lying about? 2. The desperation. We want confident men.
And I never said we blame him for the reason we block (read the original post again if in doubt), the thread is using him as illustration of why we have adopted a strategy of delete/block for some time.
In answer to reason 1.... you have South Wales set as your location, is that ALL of South Wales? We have Slough Windsor Heathrow ish... thats another large area, maybe he didnt put him home town to maintain some discretion?
Reason 2... was it desperate to clarify his actual locatikn? Be flattered he was attracted enough to disclose his actual location.
I still can't see it as an illustration of why people dont reply or block because he hasn't really done anything wrong.
Like I said, you are free to conduct your profile how you see fit... if you found his second message warrants a block thats fine but imagine if he is now reading this forum?
I think Id feel pretty crap if my messages had caused a couple to start a thread about them.
"
I agree. |
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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago
Slough Windsor ish |
"I can see the value of 'tweaking' your location by a couple of miles, but 40? that's just ridiculous!!"
Im assuming he is also in South Wales, there are lots of small villages their, I doubt I would be terribly specific either.
We don't live in Eton but if we did we sure as hell wouldn't use it in our username or our location... its a tiny place |
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
OP.
Have you considered that the guy with whom you made contact, did exactly the same as you have?
Via this thread, you have admitted you don't wish to meet and play with anyone close to your location.
Equally, he's thinking the same way and has done the same. But you have blocked him as he has "breached" your own (non publicised conditions!).
I have witnessed others on here who say they won't meet anyone local to their home town or city. Then if anyone fails to read that & makes an approach to you anyway, then it could be considered justifiable to block accordingly.
Maybe you need to include a line or two in your Profile stating you don't meet anyone within ** miles of your location.
Otherwise, people who contact you and find themselves blocked, begin to wonder, "what did I do wrong?" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A bloke messages. It's polite so we check him out.
Unfortunately he's too close to home (we're not looking for anyone too close).
We politely thank him for getting in touch but explain we're not considering anyone too close.
We then get the follow on messsge explaining that he's not actually that close and actually lives further away than his profile says.
Seriously lads, can you be surprised thst you don't get responses and get blocked?
I dont see the problem here... lots have very vague locations on their profile, he was simply clarifying that he wasn't as close as you thought.
Obviously you must block or reply to whoever you choose but I wouldn't say this gentleman deserves to have a thread started blaming him for the reason you block not reply.
"
 |
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"I can see the value of 'tweaking' your location by a couple of miles, but 40? that's just ridiculous!!"
I can't see the point in tweaking by only a couple of miles. If the reason is for discretion then you'd want to make sure no one in your local area found you by doing a "within so many miles" search and I don't think most people stick to within two miles.
My location is many miles from where I actually am for that reason. |
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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago
Slough Windsor ish |
"OP.
Have you considered that the guy with whom you made contact, did exactly the same as you have?
Via this thread, you have admitted you don't wish to meet and play with anyone close to your location.
Equally, he's thinking the same way and has done the same. But you have blocked him as he has "breached" your own (non publicised conditions!).
I have witnessed others on here who say they won't meet anyone local to their home town or city. Then if anyone fails to read that & makes an approach to you anyway, then it could be considered justifiable to block accordingly.
Maybe you need to include a line or two in your Profile stating you don't meet anyone within ** miles of your location.
Otherwise, people who contact you and find themselves blocked, begin to wonder, "what did I do wrong?""
The problem there is many dont use their actual location... Ive seen profiles from Timbuktoo to the biscuit aisle in Morrisons. How on earth would anyone know how far they are other than if they use there 'who's near' function? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"OP it's your profile and your messages so you can do whatever you want.
However this does appear to be simply another man bashing thread..."he's desperate" for daring to clarify his location. It's not like your location is that specific!
So having traduced him, adversely represented his character for doing exactly what you are doing regarding specific locations, blocked him, and had a forum rant about said person,....
have you considered looking in a mirror?
I'm rather wondering who's behaviour in this matter is the more appalling..
Oh and that smell... yeah I notice it a lot on single guy bashing threads. Did you stand in something unpleasant "
I'm usually very laid back about repetitive threads, but the man bashing ones are getting way too much air time on here. |
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
"OP.
Have you considered that the guy with whom you made contact, did exactly the same as you have?
Via this thread, you have admitted you don't wish to meet and play with anyone close to your location.
Equally, he's thinking the same way and has done the same. But you have blocked him as he has "breached" your own (non publicised conditions!).
I have witnessed others on here who say they won't meet anyone local to their home town or city. Then if anyone fails to read that & makes an approach to you anyway, then it could be considered justifiable to block accordingly.
Maybe you need to include a line or two in your Profile stating you don't meet anyone within ** miles of your location.
Otherwise, people who contact you and find themselves blocked, begin to wonder, "what did I do wrong?"
The problem there is many dont use their actual location... Ive seen profiles from Timbuktoo to the biscuit aisle in Morrisons. How on earth would anyone know how far they are other than if they use there 'who's near' function?"
Agreed. It really comes down to all to state where they actually are??
If only it was a perfect world?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can see the value of 'tweaking' your location by a couple of miles, but 40? that's just ridiculous!!"
Why is it?
We meet in Manchester 99% of the time.
We live 40 miles away from Manchester but have our location set there...doesn’t sound so ridiculously now does is it  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Just delete and block. Polite refusal is pointless."
That is confusing and frustrating. I always take time to compose a readable and polite message appropriate to the other’s profile.
I’m more than happy to accept a “no” and find a failure to reply quite rude. I accept that women / couples receive lots of messages, but this is universal and applies to guys and TVs. |
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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago
Slough Windsor ish |
"
Just delete and block. Polite refusal is pointless.
That is confusing and frustrating. I always take time to compose a readable and polite message appropriate to the other’s profile.
I’m more than happy to accept a “no” and find a failure to reply quite rude. I accept that women / couples receive lots of messages, but this is universal and applies to guys and TVs. "
Site guidance clearly states its not rude, just accept that no reply means they are not interested. |
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Just got a guy message me several times saying he wants fucked and me to be his mummy lol. .I answered politely but negatively for a while then said he should read my profile where it says I don't fuck guys...said he had blah blah blah....blocked. |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"A bloke messages. It's polite so we check him out.
Unfortunately he's too close to home (we're not looking for anyone too close).
We politely thank him for getting in touch but explain we're not considering anyone too close.
We then get the follow on messsge explaining that he's not actually that close and actually lives further away than his profile says.
Seriously lads, can you be surprised thst you don't get responses and get blocked?"
Unfortunately you come across as being quite arrogant. No doubt he had a lucky escape and you did him a favour by blocking him. |
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"A bloke messages. It's polite so we check him out.
Unfortunately he's too close to home (we're not looking for anyone too close).
We politely thank him for getting in touch but explain we're not considering anyone too close.
We then get the follow on messsge explaining that he's not actually that close and actually lives further away than his profile says.
Seriously lads, can you be surprised thst you don't get responses and get blocked?"
We can block for any reason and no explanation/justification needed, but as you've started this thread I have to say I don't see what he did wrong.
Many people don't put their exact location. |
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"A bloke messages. It's polite so we check him out.
Unfortunately he's too close to home (we're not looking for anyone too close).
We politely thank him for getting in touch but explain we're not considering anyone too close.
We then get the follow on messsge explaining that he's not actually that close and actually lives further away than his profile says.
Seriously lads, can you be surprised thst you don't get responses and get blocked?
I dont see the problem here... lots have very vague locations on their profile, he was simply clarifying that he wasn't as close as you thought.
Obviously you must block or reply to whoever you choose but I wouldn't say this gentleman deserves to have a thread started blaming him for the reason you block not reply.
"
Ah...not just me then! |
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"A bloke messages. It's polite so we check him out.
Unfortunately he's too close to home (we're not looking for anyone too close).
We politely thank him for getting in touch but explain we're not considering anyone too close.
We then get the follow on messsge explaining that he's not actually that close and actually lives further away than his profile says.
Seriously lads, can you be surprised thst you don't get responses and get blocked?
Unfortunately you come across as being quite arrogant. No doubt he had a lucky escape and you did him a favour by blocking him. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can see the value of 'tweaking' your location by a couple of miles, but 40? that's just ridiculous!!
I can't see the point in tweaking by only a couple of miles. If the reason is for discretion then you'd want to make sure no one in your local area found you by doing a "within so many miles" search and I don't think most people stick to within two miles.
My location is many miles from where I actually am for that reason."
I'm actually 289 miles from . |
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I think he was just doing what many do,using a vague location,until he's established who he's chatting to.
If he then clarified it afterwards I don't see the issue.
He didn't deliberately mislead you in my opinion
Miss |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well done op you have a bock button which you're obviously very friendly with but the issue here is with yourselves not the guy who messaged you. No wonder guys get fed up composing opening messages when it's this kind of attitude they come up against more often than not |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t live in the exact location I have on my profile. Two reasons for that - I don’t meet locally so don’t want the risk of ‘bumping’ into someone I know on here and secondly it’s where I tend to socialise.
I also occasionally change locations if I’m visiting that area for work too.
Loads of people do it, dont see the issue. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OP it's your profile and your messages so you can do whatever you want.
However this does appear to be simply another man bashing thread..."he's desperate" for daring to clarify his location. It's not like your location is that specific!
So having traduced him, adversely represented his character for doing exactly what you are doing regarding specific locations, blocked him, and had a forum rant about said person,....
have you considered looking in a mirror?
I'm rather wondering who's behaviour in this matter is the more appalling..
Oh and that smell... yeah I notice it a lot on single guy bashing threads. Did you stand in something unpleasant "
Well said |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The man who messaged did nothing wrong, I often tell men they are too far away and get replies that they are living in my town working on Hinckley C. Then I am interested in them, I,m not going to dismiss a potentially good meet because the man has not updated his location yet. You blocked him, you don't need to start a thread moaning about it. The man might read it, why bother blocking him if you want to communicate with him in this way via the forum. You are having a dog at him and its UNFAIR on him because he cannot reply via forum as he will get a ban.
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"Sorry to hear about your issues, see I'm blocked aswell...don't think I've ever messaged haha Happy fabbing! X"
That doesn’t surprise me as the op is obviously very trigger happy.I often speak up on these sort of threads for single men but thanks to several sensible contributions on this thread I don’t feel the need to.The op so obviously illustrates that their is arrogance and bad manners displayed by all groups on here when it comes to messages.
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