FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Better conversations in threads
Better conversations in threads
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Is it just me or do you also get that sense people want to chat, want to engage and get to know others in the forums but don't really have much to say?
Some threads have the banal topics and people don't talk they just put superficial one liners in the list of responses. So I rarely read actual discussion, just a machine gun fire of sound bites until there is disagreement. I have seen a number of occasions where as soon as someone breaks a rule there is a swarming of retribution.
Are you a little disappointed that there is not much enquiry and empathy in the threads, or is it just me having unrealistic expectations?
What’s your _iew of the engagement factor in most of the threads?
What type of thread do you like best and why?
What ideas do you have that could spruce up the topics and make the conversations more engaging and interesting?
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I have found the forums a good source of information. Have made quite a few good friends from the forums and hopefully continue to do so. I like the banter and the light hearted threads. Although I tend to stay away from the more serious threads but thats through choice, having said that i have been know to post on the more serious threads. As for empathy ive seen that on a number of threads. We all take different things fron te forums. |
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By *umourCouple
over a year ago
Rushden |
Nothing against any posts, may not agree with em but I have no problems with em being there.
I try not to give one line answers and I find there are some that do who only ever try to give the "clever" answer. I do think some on here want to discuss, but feel they may be shot down in flames if they post a subject that others don't like.
The thing that I dislike is when certain people on here diss a thread because it may have been asked before or because they see it as moaning. These certain people all seem to follow each other out and it can be like a parade!
However, I have asked a number of times what people want to see as threads on here if they really don't like what is posted, but not had one answer yet! 
In general though, not a bad forum.
Discuss  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Anything goes in the forums, especially the lounge.
I tend not to participate in any threads on politics/religion/football/sports, or any of the "would you do this to that" threads.
I also do not like to participate in moaning/whinging/complaining threads as I have no time for negativities.
I like fun and frivolous banters, and not heavy discussions to put the world to right.
Spending time in the forums is my favourite waste of time, and I would like to be amused rather than be wound up by people who believe their opinions and _iews are the only ones to have on any subject matters.
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"Anything goes in the forums, especially the lounge.
I tend not to participate in any threads on politics/religion/football/sports, or any of the "would you do this to that" threads.
I also do not like to participate in moaning/whinging/complaining threads as I have no time for negativities.
I like fun and frivolous banters, and not heavy discussions to put the world to right.
Spending time in the forums is my favourite waste of time, and I would like to be amused rather than be wound up by people who believe their opinions and _iews are the only ones to have on any subject matters.
"
I agree, theres nothing like having a bad day at work and coming home, going on the forums for a light heated banter. definately my favourite waste of time also |
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I enjoy the irony in responses such as most of the above.
I see a need for all type of posts. Those who profess that one type of post is superior to another or that certain types of posts are superfluous generally overlook the need for anything that doessn't suit their particular want. |
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"Is it just me or do you also get that sense people want to chat, want to engage and get to know others in the forums but don't really have much to say?
Some threads have the banal topics and people don't talk they just put superficial one liners in the list of responses. So I rarely read actual discussion, just a machine gun fire of sound bites until there is disagreement. I have seen a number of occasions where as soon as someone breaks a rule there is a swarming of retribution.
Are you a little disappointed that there is not much enquiry and empathy in the threads, or is it just me having unrealistic expectations?
What’s your _iew of the engagement factor in most of the threads?
What type of thread do you like best and why?
What ideas do you have that could spruce up the topics and make the conversations more engaging and interesting?
"
Whilst I do agree with some of the points you make I think you are maybe forgetting that this is a swinging site. Yes, I know that we are all complex and have other sides to us but if I want more indepth discussion and reflection on the important things in life Im afraid Fab would not be my first port of call. I enjoy the variety of posts and ignore those that dont interest me. I do sometimes for the (hopefully amusing) one liners and other times I am moved (or in the mood) to give a fuller comment, often on a slightly more serious issue. I make my own judgements whether to take notice of other posts but Im here for the entertainment value, not to put the world to rights by posting on a swinging site. |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
They all amuse me in some way or other. I like observing human behaviour and you see all sorts on here. Long may it continue.
I am not looking for in depth discussions... But I respect those that are, I have certainly learned from a few threads different ways of looking at things and how people deal with stuff.
My favourite are ones about Jezza Kyle or X Factor or the like..... I love them and the reactions you get.
Actually, my most favourite of all... Are the music ones, I have discovered great songs that I had never heard of before and they bring me joy listening to them.
The rest range from similar to the coffee room in the House of Commons, lecture theatre at Oxbridge or the playground of your local primary school.... And the behaviours are the same.
All in all, a thumbs up from me...
PS..... The ones that show true compassion to their fellow man are also high on my list. Paying tribute to the fallen, the heros and inspirational people are all winners. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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agree some of the whitty threads have been just brilliant.
especialy love the ones where you g in thinking it a serious topic by name and the OP has quite brilliantlly turned it on its head and giving me a right to laugh
Still nothing beets a good bit laughter at any time of day 9well maybe laughter & sex together lol) |
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I agree with a lot of the above. With regards a lack of empathy...well, anyone who has been around the Fab forums for over a year will well remember the empathy and support for Kitty when our darling Alfie was taken and I remember well another forumite posting her disgust when her terminally ill sister couldn't get a stairlift. Within a few hours one had been donated and transport of the lift arranged. There is always support given for those who are sad, ill, or grieving.
Yes, there are a lot of frivolous threads, yes there are some serious threads. There are jaw-achingly funny threads, moaning,whinging threads, infuriating threads (did I mention that it's only 70 days to Christmas  ) and occasionally some threads which turn into downright nasty personal attacks - thankfully not too many of these. All in all, I think that there is something for everyone in the Fab forums...both for regular forumites and the multitude of lurkers.......long may the forums continue |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I love the forums and I love all the different types of threads. I used to dislike the one liners and frivolous threads until a poster described that after stressful days he liked to unwind with silliness on the forum and didn't want to indulge in serious whilst on here.
I'm not a one liner type of person, I am a talkaholic. I enjoy banter and I also enjoy disagreement. All being nicey nicey, in agreement and kissing each others ass is rather boring to me. The people I am friendly with and the people I disagree with are all important to me in terms of the forum as because of them I am enjoying my time here.
If I disagree with a subject or post I will say so, regardless of who has posted. Sometimes groups of friends may find it difficult to disagree with one another in a forceful way, or feel they need to jump in and defend a friend against a disagreement with another, and that's a shame because it doesn't mean that you're falling out with anyone, its just a point of _iew. Some people you may disagree with a lot but its only words on a forum, when you turn the computer off its gone.
I have seen lots of empathy, humour, kindness, respect on here, I've seen equal amounts of jealousy, spite, sarcasm, envy.
Long live the forums and all who play in here
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"Is it just me or do you also get that sense people want to chat, want to engage and get to know others in the forums but don't really have much to say?
Some threads have the banal topics and people don't talk they just put superficial one liners in the list of responses. So I rarely read actual discussion, just a machine gun fire of sound bites until there is disagreement. I have seen a number of occasions where as soon as someone breaks a rule there is a swarming of retribution.
Are you a little disappointed that there is not much enquiry and empathy in the threads, or is it just me having unrealistic expectations?
What’s your _iew of the engagement factor in most of the threads?
What type of thread do you like best and why?
What ideas do you have that could spruce up the topics and make the conversations more engaging and interesting?
"
I like the mix of everything , some of the "banal topics" turn into the funniest threads ever ( see Dirty arse thread for one)
I am not sure these sites are the right place for indepth discussions like you can see on other more suitable forums, but there have been some great discussions on here non the less.
All in all, it is a swinging site where you can have some fun, life doesn't always have to be serious |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We see this forum as a bit of simple fun, nothing more nothing less. If we want empathetic and engaged debate we'll go elsewhere. Re 'Banal' posts, these often generate the funniest responses - so long live banal! |
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I've just seen the FTSE index and feel there is nothing else to do but sit in contemplation of the demise of world enonomy and the unavoidable death of the whole of humanity and yes..... i'd fuck the one above! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm only here for the forums. The last thing I read at work in Thursday was the post mortem of a two day old baby. When I logged on it cheered me up no end the "banal" threads on here. I would even have participated in a "would you..."thread if I'd spotted one.
There are many intelligent, professional people that post on the forums. These same people often start these "banal" threads as they are seeking to engage other forumites and indulge in light relief from stressful days.
These forums provide an outlet for anyone that wants it...a sense of superiority is not an attractive trait.
Right...who likes big tits? Lordy. Lordy...I've been reading too many Raisa posts! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've just seen the FTSE index and feel there is nothing else to do but sit in contemplation of the demise of world enonomy and the unavoidable death of the whole of humanity and yes..... i'd fuck the one above! "
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By *DSRMan
over a year ago
leicester |
I like the threads alot and so far i have enjoyed everyones posts (except that fool, you know who you are grrrr) messing haha
anyways, yeah i like the place, welcomming, friendly, fun... More indepth convo's? i guess it would be nice, showing our deeper side and thoughts, but in terms of those types of subjects (religion, politics etc) it can get pretty darn ugly! I find this entire site fantastic... not found any obvious cons on here yet, not had any indepth long lasting convos in chat or emails either! But first impressions... Is i have found a nice site with genuine and friendly folk
x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Also some threads rival the very best from any comedy room or script..."
they sure do ive really laughed out loud many times and for someone who lives pretty much alone the forums and FAB in general is so welcome on cold lonely night . and i get the occasional lovely guy to give me some fun too .... |
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The forums are like being in a busy pub, you get all sorts of discussions, and as people drift in an out the topics change, there is a laugh, some fisticuffs, a bit of banter, a little serious discussion, and maybe a little flirting too..... there is good news, bad news, and more banal banter and in-jokes, but the thing about it all is, its educational. I like it how it is. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'd be interested to know what you mean by 'better' conversation ? "
Hi,
I mean conversations where people explore how others see things, where ideas are unraveled, where you learn something about someone ot something.
Best wishes
Ray x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd be interested to know what you mean by 'better' conversation ?
Hi,
I mean conversations where people explore how others see things, where ideas are unraveled, where you learn something about someone ot something.
Best wishes
Ray x"
Well, how do you think your thread is going? xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd be interested to know what you mean by 'better' conversation ?
Hi,
I mean conversations where people explore how others see things, where ideas are unraveled, where you learn something about someone ot something.
Best wishes
Ray x"
Maybe you should read back some old forum threads, all of humanity in its glorious diversity is spread there before you, in depth, silly, frivolous, argumentative, supportive it's all there. xxx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'd be interested to know what you mean by 'better' conversation ?
Hi,
I mean conversations where people explore how others see things, where ideas are unraveled, where you learn something about someone ot something.
Best wishes
Ray x
Well, how do you think your thread is going? xx"
Hi,
I think some people are starting a conversation but they seem to direct there messages at me rather than allow a conversation to flow as it would if we were all face to face in a pub or somewhere.
I can't argue with the logic of a community needing balance, some light topics and some more questioning discussions. However, I think it's 'safer' to ask questions like "Whose got the nicest bum?" and maybe this is part of a process I have yet to experience. maybe people start connections asking superficial topics and then get to meet someone where they ask more questions??
I'm glad I asked this question
Ray xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Nothing against any posts, may not agree with em but I have no problems with em being there.
I try not to give one line answers and I find there are some that do who only ever try to give the "clever" answer. I do think some on here want to discuss, but feel they may be shot down in flames if they post a subject that others don't like.
The thing that I dislike is when certain people on here diss a thread because it may have been asked before or because they see it as moaning. These certain people all seem to follow each other out and it can be like a parade!
However, I have asked a number of times what people want to see as threads on here if they really don't like what is posted, but not had one answer yet!
In general though, not a bad forum.
Discuss "
Hi,
I think I have the same _iew as you have of the threads and hope by putting the issue on the table people will ask more enquiring questions. It has happened on here where Grumpy asked what I meant by "Better conversation"; that was great and maybe I should have said more but did not want to write too much
Best wishes
Ray xx |
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Ray, you have only been on the site a few weeks. If you hang around the forums you will get a better "feel" of the forumites. Some threads are frivilous, some stir up a good debate. Some you will find people baring their souls. You will also work out peoples sense of humour. Join in and you will find out much more then you think in a very short time |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'd be interested to know what you mean by 'better' conversation ?
Hi,
I mean conversations where people explore how others see things, where ideas are unraveled, where you learn something about someone ot something.
Best wishes
Ray x
Maybe you should read back some old forum threads, all of humanity in its glorious diversity is spread there before you, in depth, silly, frivolous, argumentative, supportive it's all there. xxx"
I may have been looking in the wrong threads. I have enjoyed private messages where people start getting to know each other and whether meeting would be good. Perhaps the forums are "Step 1" in a communication process that moves beyond the thread?
Thanks
Ray xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OMG, its called irony- ffs!
They all adore me really!
I have my own fan club!
Lighten Up!!!!!"
Oi talking of fans can I stop now me blooming arm killing me ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OMG, its called irony- ffs!
They all adore me really!
I have my own fan club!
Lighten Up!!!!!
Okay, I walked in to that one (;-)
Ray x"
Watch her mate shes a live one that xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OMG, its called irony- ffs!
They all adore me really!
I have my own fan club!
Lighten Up!!!!!
Oi talking of fans can I stop now me blooming arm killing me ! "
Yes gowone and play with your favourite toy, sweetie  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OMG, its called irony- ffs!
They all adore me really!
I have my own fan club!
Lighten Up!!!!!
Oi talking of fans can I stop now me blooming arm killing me !
Yes gowone and play with your favourite toy, sweetie "
Thank you xx |
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"I'd be interested to know what you mean by 'better' conversation ?
Hi,
I mean conversations where people explore how others see things, where ideas are unraveled, where you learn something about someone ot something.
Best wishes
Ray x
Maybe you should read back some old forum threads, all of humanity in its glorious diversity is spread there before you, in depth, silly, frivolous, argumentative, supportive it's all there. xxx
I may have been looking in the wrong threads. I have enjoyed private messages where people start getting to know each other and whether meeting would be good. Perhaps the forums are "Step 1" in a communication process that moves beyond the thread?
Thanks
Ray xx"
ya think? 
You know,you might be onto something...people uing different modes of communication to build up an idea of who they find attractive..it might just catch on |
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"
que?
have you tried the CHAT rooms?How do you chat in there unless your a speed reader.  "
Its an acquired skill,i know it seems daunting at first but you learn to recognize colours(there is a name for that i cant remember,)and edit out conversations you are not involved in... |
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"An aquired skill that is great when you are sober or 'not busy' but OMG, when you are pissed or shagging its a blurrrrrrrrrrr "
Shagging on cam all ,all anyone will say is phwooar...or words to that effect...pissed,well its probably not a good idea... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I just assumed people had severe rheumatoid arthritis in their hands and couldn’t type more than ‘yes’ or ‘no’ without it becoming painful."
Like it (;-) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
que?
have you tried the CHAT rooms?How do you chat in there unless your a speed reader. "
I agree. I struggle to see any conversation in the chat rooms. It's machine gun fire again as far as I can see
Maybe over 40's have a different notion of what people chatting is to your text generations? God, I feel old (;-) |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"They all amuse me in some way or other. I like observing human behaviour and you see all sorts on here. Long may it continue."
Me, too - I like oberving differnet behaviours, reading different _iews (pardon the pun) and sometimes participating. Tend to avoid the political ones as I find they are often too black and white, posters often too set in their ways and not open to genuine debate anymore so for me it would be a waste of breath... or finger effort. Otherwise thumbs up for most threads |
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"They all amuse me in some way or other. I like observing human behaviour and you see all sorts on here. Long may it continue.
Me, too - I like oberving differnet behaviours, reading different _iews (pardon the pun) and sometimes participating. Tend to avoid the political ones as I find they are often too black and white, posters often too set in their ways and not open to genuine debate anymore so for me it would be a waste of breath... or finger effort. Otherwise thumbs up for most threads "
Or thumbs up for moist treats? |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"They all amuse me in some way or other. I like observing human behaviour and you see all sorts on here. Long may it continue.
Me, too - I like oberving differnet behaviours, reading different _iews (pardon the pun) and sometimes participating. Tend to avoid the political ones as I find they are often too black and white, posters often too set in their ways and not open to genuine debate anymore so for me it would be a waste of breath... or finger effort. Otherwise thumbs up for most threads
Or thumbs up for moist treats?"
Chocolate Brownies come to mind ...;-) |
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