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I’ve had sex only once, 20 years ago

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By *ophieslut OP   TV/TS  over a year ago

Central

As a woman, she's had sex once - when she was 20. She tried again but couldn't let him in, thinking it was vaginismus. Now 40, what do you think of her plight? https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2018/mar/02/my-life-in-sex-one-timer-vaginismus

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By *ophieslut OP   TV/TS  over a year ago

Central

Would you have put up and shut up?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

She sounds perfectly happy. If you've never had something would you miss it?

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By *ophieslut OP   TV/TS  over a year ago

Central


"She sounds perfectly happy. If you've never had something would you miss it? "

I'm inclined to agree, though we are often pushed to behave and live a certain way just because we think most other people are, or it's the right thing to do.

She's stayed single, so hasn't presented herself with the opportunity to check whether she has an ongoing problem. Many of us have been with the wrong partners, where we've done or refused to do something that was 'wrong' for us in that context.

I wonder though whether it might be better for her to know whether she has any ongoing issue now, rather than should she ever be inside a relationship in future, where it then might cause a greater level of pressure for her.

As she's reached out after 20 years, I'm assuming it has some significance to her now, so she may also find greater piece of mind if she were to somehow discover more.

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By *innamon!Woman  over a year ago

no matter

There is a place were people with Vaginismus can go for help. The couple go away to a clinic and learn all sorts of methods to help them. There is also a Facebook group that gives advise. The girls have struggled for years with this, when they have been helped they come back later to post pictures of their babies.

Really lovely that someone takes the trouble to help them. I dont believe there are such clinics in UK.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I know someone who had vaginissimus due to a traumatic experience. With a lot of care, love and patience she eventually overcame it

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