FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Best way to get responses
Best way to get responses
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Ive been on this site for just over 1 week now. I'm a professional normal guy looking to embrace my inner kink.
I'm not having much luck getting responses to messages im sending to the women that interest me. I am not disrespectful or too forward in my approach and understand there are a lot of creeps ruining things for us normal guys.
Do you ladies have any advice on how I can improve my profile or my approach to start getting quality responses.
Gx
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keep it simple without being dirty or rude (to start with) and keep plugging away, we get loads of messages (can feel like a flood at times)
Another option is to get out to socials and clubs and meet in person that way |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes.
A forum search for threads like yours will provide you with endless snippets of solid advice so please have a search, a read, and apply the advice.
If you want a critique (a tough one) of your profile then here:
Username puts me off - bit childish and flippant and not appealing to me.
No public pics - you’re losing my interest rapidly there are lots of lovely men to view where I don’t have to become a site friend with them first before I know if I’m attracted to them and likewise don’t have to allow them access to my private pics first.
Avatar has a comical face thing - ugh more childish. I’m rolling my eyes now.
Calls himself a heavy cummer - oh lord.
Not up for anything weird - how do I know what he determines as weird, unhelpful comment and a waste of text really.
He “supports” safe sex, supports? Rather odd phrasing.
Profile text not overly offensive but generic and basic and not really of any interest especially when there’s nothing else to distinguish from every other bland beige insipid average male profile on here. Boring.
Ignore.
*goes off to look for profiles with hot pics or wording that woos me into an orgasm I’m reading*
Oh and 26, too young for me.
(All the best, enjoy Fab and have a read of the previous threads you’ll receive much inherited wisdom and learn that sadly it’s a numbers game for men on here and you need to stand out and be patient too)  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes.
A forum search for threads like yours will provide you with endless snippets of solid advice so please have a search, a read, and apply the advice.
If you want a critique (a tough one) of your profile then here:
Username puts me off - bit childish and flippant and not appealing to me.
No public pics - you’re losing my interest rapidly there are lots of lovely men to view where I don’t have to become a site friend with them first before I know if I’m attracted to them and likewise don’t have to allow them access to my private pics first.
Avatar has a comical face thing - ugh more childish. I’m rolling my eyes now.
Calls himself a heavy cummer - oh lord.
Not up for anything weird - how do I know what he determines as weird, unhelpful comment and a waste of text really.
He “supports” safe sex, supports? Rather odd phrasing.
Profile text not overly offensive but generic and basic and not really of any interest especially when there’s nothing else to distinguish from every other bland beige insipid average male profile on here. Boring.
Ignore.
*goes off to look for profiles with hot pics or wording that woos me into an orgasm I’m reading*
Oh and 26, too young for me.
(All the best, enjoy Fab and have a read of the previous threads you’ll receive much inherited wisdom and learn that sadly it’s a numbers game for men on here and you need to stand out and be patient too) "
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"Haha surely I can't be that bad looking  "
Firstly welcome to fab and the forums.
Its difficult to tell what you look like from your profile picture but you look fine to me.
Your profile looks ok too, I've seen much worse.  .I don't think there's a type of message guaranteed to get a response but if you make sure you are what they're looking for and vice versa its a start.
Good luck! |
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By *halky90Man
over a year ago
Birmingham |
"Yes.
A forum search for threads like yours will provide you with endless snippets of solid advice so please have a search, a read, and apply the advice.
If you want a critique (a tough one) of your profile then here:
Username puts me off - bit childish and flippant and not appealing to me.
No public pics - you’re losing my interest rapidly there are lots of lovely men to view where I don’t have to become a site friend with them first before I know if I’m attracted to them and likewise don’t have to allow them access to my private pics first.
Avatar has a comical face thing - ugh more childish. I’m rolling my eyes now.
Calls himself a heavy cummer - oh lord.
Not up for anything weird - how do I know what he determines as weird, unhelpful comment and a waste of text really.
He “supports” safe sex, supports? Rather odd phrasing.
Profile text not overly offensive but generic and basic and not really of any interest especially when there’s nothing else to distinguish from every other bland beige insipid average male profile on here. Boring.
Ignore.
*goes off to look for profiles with hot pics or wording that woos me into an orgasm I’m reading*
Oh and 26, too young for me.
(All the best, enjoy Fab and have a read of the previous threads you’ll receive much inherited wisdom and learn that sadly it’s a numbers game for men on here and you need to stand out and be patient too)
"
lol ok now do me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes.
A forum search for threads like yours will provide you with endless snippets of solid advice so please have a search, a read, and apply the advice.
If you want a critique (a tough one) of your profile then here:
Username puts me off - bit childish and flippant and not appealing to me.
No public pics - you’re losing my interest rapidly there are lots of lovely men to view where I don’t have to become a site friend with them first before I know if I’m attracted to them and likewise don’t have to allow them access to my private pics first.
Avatar has a comical face thing - ugh more childish. I’m rolling my eyes now.
Calls himself a heavy cummer - oh lord.
Not up for anything weird - how do I know what he determines as weird, unhelpful comment and a waste of text really.
He “supports” safe sex, supports? Rather odd phrasing.
Profile text not overly offensive but generic and basic and not really of any interest especially when there’s nothing else to distinguish from every other bland beige insipid average male profile on here. Boring.
Ignore.
*goes off to look for profiles with hot pics or wording that woos me into an orgasm I’m reading*
Oh and 26, too young for me.
(All the best, enjoy Fab and have a read of the previous threads you’ll receive much inherited wisdom and learn that sadly it’s a numbers game for men on here and you need to stand out and be patient too)
lol ok now do me "
Write an actual profile and I’ll critique it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes.
A forum search for threads like yours will provide you with endless snippets of solid advice so please have a search, a read, and apply the advice.
If you want a critique (a tough one) of your profile then here:
Username puts me off - bit childish and flippant and not appealing to me.
No public pics - you’re losing my interest rapidly there are lots of lovely men to view where I don’t have to become a site friend with them first before I know if I’m attracted to them and likewise don’t have to allow them access to my private pics first.
Avatar has a comical face thing - ugh more childish. I’m rolling my eyes now.
Calls himself a heavy cummer - oh lord.
Not up for anything weird - how do I know what he determines as weird, unhelpful comment and a waste of text really.
He “supports” safe sex, supports? Rather odd phrasing.
Profile text not overly offensive but generic and basic and not really of any interest especially when there’s nothing else to distinguish from every other bland beige insipid average male profile on here. Boring.
Ignore.
*goes off to look for profiles with hot pics or wording that woos me into an orgasm I’m reading*
Oh and 26, too young for me.
(All the best, enjoy Fab and have a read of the previous threads you’ll receive much inherited wisdom and learn that sadly it’s a numbers game for men on here and you need to stand out and be patient too)
lol ok now do me "
You and OP don’t need to message me. You can reply on the forum. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Nonesense... don't listen to them I reckon I get about an 80% respone rate. A week... no replies? Tough call, probably best leaving the site. But if you want to give it a last ditch effort...
I'm not going to give away my secrets but here are a few basics...
... get a penis photo up asap... hey fuck it, better put 10 on... stick with the impact statements "heavy cummer" nice! Girth, repeater yadda yadda
No need for messages really. Go straight for the unsolicited friend request. Better wink too just to be safe.
If they ignore it then drop a message... get to the point! Something snappy like "lets fuck".
"Want to meet now?"
Try to stick with tx speak and slang... show you're cool.
If that doesn't work update your status to show "how ignorant" everyone is for not relying.
If you don't get a meet with that advice in a week... well you've got no chance. Better just close your account.
You're welcome! |
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By *halky90Man
over a year ago
Birmingham |
"Yes.
A forum search for threads like yours will provide you with endless snippets of solid advice so please have a search, a read, and apply the advice.
If you want a critique (a tough one) of your profile then here:
Username puts me off - bit childish and flippant and not appealing to me.
No public pics - you’re losing my interest rapidly there are lots of lovely men to view where I don’t have to become a site friend with them first before I know if I’m attracted to them and likewise don’t have to allow them access to my private pics first.
Avatar has a comical face thing - ugh more childish. I’m rolling my eyes now.
Calls himself a heavy cummer - oh lord.
Not up for anything weird - how do I know what he determines as weird, unhelpful comment and a waste of text really.
He “supports” safe sex, supports? Rather odd phrasing.
Profile text not overly offensive but generic and basic and not really of any interest especially when there’s nothing else to distinguish from every other bland beige insipid average male profile on here. Boring.
Ignore.
*goes off to look for profiles with hot pics or wording that woos me into an orgasm I’m reading*
Oh and 26, too young for me.
(All the best, enjoy Fab and have a read of the previous threads you’ll receive much inherited wisdom and learn that sadly it’s a numbers game for men on here and you need to stand out and be patient too)
lol ok now do me
Write an actual profile and I’ll critique it. "
I thought I'd keep it short and sweet as didn't really know what I should put on something like this lol so short send sweet bad ? |
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By *halky90Man
over a year ago
Birmingham |
"Yes.
A forum search for threads like yours will provide you with endless snippets of solid advice so please have a search, a read, and apply the advice.
If you want a critique (a tough one) of your profile then here:
Username puts me off - bit childish and flippant and not appealing to me.
No public pics - you’re losing my interest rapidly there are lots of lovely men to view where I don’t have to become a site friend with them first before I know if I’m attracted to them and likewise don’t have to allow them access to my private pics first.
Avatar has a comical face thing - ugh more childish. I’m rolling my eyes now.
Calls himself a heavy cummer - oh lord.
Not up for anything weird - how do I know what he determines as weird, unhelpful comment and a waste of text really.
He “supports” safe sex, supports? Rather odd phrasing.
Profile text not overly offensive but generic and basic and not really of any interest especially when there’s nothing else to distinguish from every other bland beige insipid average male profile on here. Boring.
Ignore.
*goes off to look for profiles with hot pics or wording that woos me into an orgasm I’m reading*
Oh and 26, too young for me.
(All the best, enjoy Fab and have a read of the previous threads you’ll receive much inherited wisdom and learn that sadly it’s a numbers game for men on here and you need to stand out and be patient too)
lol ok now do me
You and OP don’t need to message me. You can reply on the forum. "
cheerful one ain't you lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes.
A forum search for threads like yours will provide you with endless snippets of solid advice so please have a search, a read, and apply the advice.
If you want a critique (a tough one) of your profile then here:
Username puts me off - bit childish and flippant and not appealing to me.
No public pics - you’re losing my interest rapidly there are lots of lovely men to view where I don’t have to become a site friend with them first before I know if I’m attracted to them and likewise don’t have to allow them access to my private pics first.
Avatar has a comical face thing - ugh more childish. I’m rolling my eyes now.
Calls himself a heavy cummer - oh lord.
Not up for anything weird - how do I know what he determines as weird, unhelpful comment and a waste of text really.
He “supports” safe sex, supports? Rather odd phrasing.
Profile text not overly offensive but generic and basic and not really of any interest especially when there’s nothing else to distinguish from every other bland beige insipid average male profile on here. Boring.
Ignore.
*goes off to look for profiles with hot pics or wording that woos me into an orgasm I’m reading*
Oh and 26, too young for me.
(All the best, enjoy Fab and have a read of the previous threads you’ll receive much inherited wisdom and learn that sadly it’s a numbers game for men on here and you need to stand out and be patient too)
lol ok now do me
You and OP don’t need to message me. You can reply on the forum. cheerful one ain't you lol "
I’m very cheerful
If you want advice, make your own forum post and don’t hijack someone else’s thread. Or do a forum search for profile advice. |
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"Nonesense... don't listen to them I reckon I get about an 80% respone rate. A week... no replies? Tough call, probably best leaving the site. But if you want to give it a last ditch effort...
I'm not going to give away my secrets but here are a few basics...
... get a penis photo up asap... hey fuck it, better put 10 on... stick with the impact statements "heavy cummer" nice! Girth, repeater yadda yadda
No need for messages really. Go straight for the unsolicited friend request. Better wink too just to be safe.
If they ignore it then drop a message... get to the point! Something snappy like "lets fuck".
"Want to meet now?"
Try to stick with tx speak and slang... show you're cool.
If that doesn't work update your status to show "how ignorant" everyone is for not relying.
If you don't get a meet with that advice in a week... well you've got no chance. Better just close your account.
You're welcome!"
Your profile was going well (very well) right up to the final sentence! Good luck (not that you’ll need it I’m sure)! |
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By *halky90Man
over a year ago
Birmingham |
"Yes.
A forum search for threads like yours will provide you with endless snippets of solid advice so please have a search, a read, and apply the advice.
If you want a critique (a tough one) of your profile then here:
Username puts me off - bit childish and flippant and not appealing to me.
No public pics - you’re losing my interest rapidly there are lots of lovely men to view where I don’t have to become a site friend with them first before I know if I’m attracted to them and likewise don’t have to allow them access to my private pics first.
Avatar has a comical face thing - ugh more childish. I’m rolling my eyes now.
Calls himself a heavy cummer - oh lord.
Not up for anything weird - how do I know what he determines as weird, unhelpful comment and a waste of text really.
He “supports” safe sex, supports? Rather odd phrasing.
Profile text not overly offensive but generic and basic and not really of any interest especially when there’s nothing else to distinguish from every other bland beige insipid average male profile on here. Boring.
Ignore.
*goes off to look for profiles with hot pics or wording that woos me into an orgasm I’m reading*
Oh and 26, too young for me.
(All the best, enjoy Fab and have a read of the previous threads you’ll receive much inherited wisdom and learn that sadly it’s a numbers game for men on here and you need to stand out and be patient too)
lol ok now do me
You and OP don’t need to message me. You can reply on the forum. cheerful one ain't you lol
I’m very cheerful
If you want advice, make your own forum post and don’t hijack someone else’s thread. Or do a forum search for profile advice. "
hijack ? I actually responded to him and gave my opinion. I just thought I'd get a opinion too. Didn't realise I wasn't aloud sorry!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Thanks. This is the sort of feedback I want lol.
However yes i Am a very heavy cummer. So I thought that was a good point to state?"
Why? Some things are better left to be found out |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks. This is the sort of feedback I want lol.
However yes i Am a very heavy cummer. So I thought that was a good point to state?"
It might appeal to some to state from the off, stating from the off will equally put many people off you. Some because they don’t like it, or in my case the fact that it’s one of your choices of first things to say. Hi, I’m XXX and I’m a heavy cummer - just euughh.
But I am but one female. In reality, write your profile how you want and how appeals to you as being you is the best way to find someone who authentically likes you.
Good luck, and welcome |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Thanks for the feedback ive tweaked my profile abit from the advice so far..im just gonna Have to bite the bullet and visit the F club in town I think lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Thanks for the feedback ive tweaked my profile abit from the advice so far..im just gonna Have to bite the bullet and visit the F club in town I think lol"
Good on you. Lovely public pic. And you’re a decent chap for taking what was a tough critique in good spirit and listening. I wish you lots of luck and definitely go visit local clubs, really good way to meet. |
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"Hi, I’m XXX and I’m a heavy cummer - just euughh.
Would "Hi, I'm Ace and I want to cum in your face" work then?
No. "
Awww bugger, trudges off back to the drawing board then. You girls are such hard work at times ya know  |
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
"Thanks. This is the sort of feedback I want lol.
However yes i Am a very heavy cummer. So I thought that was a good point to state?
It might appeal to some to state from the off, stating from the off will equally put many people off you. Some because they don’t like it, or in my case the fact that it’s one of your choices of first things to say. Hi, I’m XXX and I’m a heavy cummer - just euughh.
But I am but one female. In reality, write your profile how you want and how appeals to you as being you is the best way to find someone who authentically likes you.
Good luck, and welcome "
OP.
You have been given some sound advice by a few.
But it's not how gorgeous you feel you are to the ladies!
It isn't how certain aspects of your sexual activity you feel might attract the ladies.
You've only been on here 1 week. Ye Gods, what did you expect? Women falling at your feet? This is not an Instant Fix site!
You have to work damn hard to get results. It is all about "selling yourself", to make you stand out against the 1000's of other guys you're competing against.
Go to Socials, Clubs and involve yourself on the Forums. It's all about making yourself noticed via what effort you put in, not how gorgeous you think you are!
Patience, Perseverance & even more Patience over potentially a long time are the key elements.
It does work, eventually. Good luck. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Ive been on this site for just over 1 week now. I'm a professional normal guy looking to embrace my inner kink.
I'm not having much luck getting responses to messages im sending to the women that interest me. I am not disrespectful or too forward in my approach and understand there are a lot of creeps ruining things for us normal guys.
Do you ladies have any advice on how I can improve my profile or my approach to start getting quality responses.
Gx
"
it not best to ask for advice on here i would say give it time u will get some one to reply. as for me i failed lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Was gonna change my profile but you can have this OP
“I’m detective inspector pussyhunter and I’m gonna smash your backdoor open with my truncheon of love”
If that doesn’t get the women creaming their pants then clearly they’re lesbianisms |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Haha thanks. I'm going to go to club F. Just abit nervous to attend as not sure what to expect.
It's not a quick fix I'm looking for its a new way of life lol
Thanks for your advice. Very helpfully. |
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
"I'm not sure how to close it. What would you recommend? "
Another tip...don't start every sentence with I
It can be off putting to some; in certain written images, it has a negative effect and readers move on much more quickly than if the content was written in another way. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Haha great person to take advice from. I've had some great tips and advice from people.. snow white in particular.
Thanks everyone for the tips and support. |
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
"not sure what you mean by this lol sounds like good advice though. Could you simplify it for me"
Which poster are you asking?
To speak to someone directly, click on Reply and Quote (at bottom right of each post) then type out your message. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"not sure what you mean by this lol sounds like good advice though. Could you simplify it for me
Which poster are you asking?
To speak to someone directly, click on Reply and Quote (at bottom right of each post) then type out your message."
It was for you. Here's me thinking I'm replying to people as well lol |
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
"not sure what you mean by this lol sounds like good advice though. Could you simplify it for me
Which poster are you asking?
To speak to someone directly, click on Reply and Quote (at bottom right of each post) then type out your message.
It was for you. Here's me thinking I'm replying to people as well lol "
Instead of starting each sentence with I this, I that etc, rewrite the text avoiding the word I
That's what I meant. |
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"Haha thanks. I'm going to go to club F. Just abit nervous to attend as not sure what to expect.
It's not a quick fix I'm looking for its a new way of life lol
Thanks for your advice. Very helpfully."
check out their website, it's full of advice on what to expect, what not to do etc... there's a list of clubs on the main menu along from the forums/ meets,events/ clubs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just wait until someone messages you 
And hope rigor mortis doesnt set in first 
What is rigor mortis??
You go very stiff!! "
Fuck! I thought that was a hard on 
Anyway I’ve taken the OPs lead and have updated my profile, like me it’s great |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"not sure what you mean by this lol sounds like good advice though. Could you simplify it for me
Which poster are you asking?
To speak to someone directly, click on Reply and Quote (at bottom right of each post) then type out your message.
It was for you. Here's me thinking I'm replying to people as well lol
Instead of starting each sentence with I this, I that etc, rewrite the text avoiding the word I
That's what I meant."
Ok thanks |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Haha thanks. I'm going to go to club F. Just abit nervous to attend as not sure what to expect.
It's not a quick fix I'm looking for its a new way of life lol
Thanks for your advice. Very helpfully.
check out their website, it's full of advice on what to expect, what not to do etc... there's a list of clubs on the main menu along from the forums/ meets,events/ clubs"
I will check it out..I've been told there is a sauna and a jaquzi there so I'm allready half sold on it lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Just wait until someone messages you
And hope rigor mortis doesnt set in first
What is rigor mortis??
It's a stage after death when limbs go stiff."
Haha I'm not sure how this relates to my questions but it's made me chuckle |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Just wait until someone messages you
And hope rigor mortis doesnt set in first
What is rigor mortis??
It's a stage after death when limbs go stiff."
I've just tried to add you as a friend as I feel you would be a good person to turn to if I need advice in the future but it wont let me add you. Could you add me. |
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