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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Men think it’s so easy for women to meet but I find it really hard to choose. With so many messages it takes ages to sort through all the crap and by the time I have I’ve lost interest.
So put a meet up days ago for Saturday, not really had that many offers but yet I guarantee on Saturday I’ll be inundated and then it’ll be too late  |
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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago
Hillside desolate |
Instead of waiting for someone to message you about your meet, find people you like the look of and message them yourself.
As for getting too many messages and finding it a pain to sort through, set your filters to stop that   |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Instead of waiting for someone to message you about your meet, find people you like the look of and message them yourself.
As for getting too many messages and finding it a pain to sort through, set your filters to stop that "
Filters are useless and obviously I am looking too but every profile I click on has about two sentences on if I’m lucky! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I don’t want to filter out newbies or none verified I don’t mind giving them a chance, I really don’t care one bit of someone is a site supporter or not and age is a preference but not a deal breaker so I welcome messages from all ages, nor do I care if they have a profile pic as they could still send privately. I want to stop people messaging who live too far away, don’t accommodate, have less than x amount of words on their profile or have dick pics on show, wish I stop those from messaging!  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think there’s a lot of misunderstanding by some single guys. Like all other members just click their fingers and an ideal meet comes along. If only it were that easy. "
If only it was....  |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
"I don’t want to filter out newbies or none verified I don’t mind giving them a chance, I really don’t care one bit of someone is a site supporter or not and age is a preference but not a deal breaker so I welcome messages from all ages, nor do I care if they have a profile pic as they could still send privately. I want to stop people messaging who live too far away, don’t accommodate, have less than x amount of words on their profile or have dick pics on show, wish I stop those from messaging! "
Good luck with that  |
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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago
Hillside desolate |
"I think people leave it to the last minute thinking that if you have nothing else arranged you will be desperate enough to meet anyone and forget your preferences. "
That and I don't think it shows up in local updates until the day of the meet, which then increases the contact rate |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"I think people leave it to the last minute thinking that if you have nothing else arranged you will be desperate enough to meet anyone and forget your preferences.
That and I don't think it shows up in local updates until the day of the meet, which then increases the contact rate"
I think that's true, most will look at that and not bother with the meets section. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why don't you make more of an effort by putting up a picture or two?
I know that the general consensus is that single women don't have to but the truth is that decent guys are more likely to approach what they percieve as women who have made a bit of an effort.
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"Why don't you make more of an effort by putting up a picture or two?
I know that the general consensus is that single women don't have to but the truth is that decent guys are more likely to approach what they percieve as women who have made a bit of an effort.
"
She's had 2 meets in the 3 weeks of joining so I don't think she's doing too badly? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why don't you make more of an effort by putting up a picture or two?
I know that the general consensus is that single women don't have to but the truth is that decent guys are more likely to approach what they percieve as women who have made a bit of an effort.
She's had 2 meets in the 3 weeks of joining so I don't think she's doing too badly? "
She's the one saying she's not had that many offers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why don't you make more of an effort by putting up a picture or two?
I know that the general consensus is that single women don't have to but the truth is that decent guys are more likely to approach what they percieve as women who have made a bit of an effort.
She's had 2 meets in the 3 weeks of joining so I don't think she's doing too badly? "
She has had 2 verification's in the 3 weeks of joining! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think people leave it to the last minute thinking that if you have nothing else arranged you will be desperate enough to meet anyone and forget your preferences. "
you may be right but definitely not me. I like to chat first see if I want to meet them. Plus by the time i found someone, Then get up and ready it’d be too late for a meet (like to have advance notice so I can prepare before hand, there’s a lot of places to wax, shave and pluck and I might want new clothes etc ) |
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Unfortunately for all of us, we have to sort through the chaff to get our oats or something like that..
Maybe change what you are looking for slightly to try and vary the pool of possibilities a little.. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Why don't you make more of an effort by putting up a picture or two?
I know that the general consensus is that single women don't have to but the truth is that decent guys are more likely to approach what they percieve as women who have made a bit of an effort.
"
Honestly I hate putting up pics because I get too many messages which makes it harder (I’ve just uploaded one but am wondering whether to post it). Even if I put a pic of my hand the messages flood in, I assume it’s becauce in the search filter you can select those with profile pics on show so the foot flow increases 10 fold! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Unfortunately for all of us, we have to sort through the chaff to get our oats or something like that..
Maybe change what you are looking for slightly to try and vary the pool of possibilities a little.. "
I’m not here to compromise, I want want I like I don’t want to meet someone who’ll just do. I’d honestly rather meet nobody than meet someone I didn’t find attractive or charming. I’m not desperate, so going without is not a problem I’d rather wait for someone I consider to be nice. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Unfortunately for all of us, we have to sort through the chaff to get our oats or something like that..
Maybe change what you are looking for slightly to try and vary the pool of possibilities a little..
I’m not here to compromise, I want want I like I don’t want to meet someone who’ll just do. I’d honestly rather meet nobody than meet someone I didn’t find attractive or charming. I’m not desperate, so going without is not a problem I’d rather wait for someone I consider to be nice."
That’s perfectly reasonable, do what ever you want to do. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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but your profile is pretty barren except the text...I dunno what you expect to be honest. Plus you state that you want build up rapport prior to any potential meet...
then the last part..only meet with partner(I will always assume when I read this that the person in question may not actually be controlling their own profile),so I'll effectively jumping through hoops for some guys interpretation of what he wants the meet to like.
Either YOU have to change the way you intend to meet or stop complaining its not going your way.
If a single man had posted the thread, he would have instantly been told how effectively empty his profile is to acquire potential meets. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think people leave it to the last minute thinking that if you have nothing else arranged you will be desperate enough to meet anyone and forget your preferences.
That and I don't think it shows up in local updates until the day of the meet, which then increases the contact rate"
I’ve also been putting up meets daily saying anyone interested in meeting Saturday but then I just get loads of message saying I’m free now!! don’t think people read they just see meet and send a message  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think people leave it to the last minute thinking that if you have nothing else arranged you will be desperate enough to meet anyone and forget your preferences.
That and I don't think it shows up in local updates until the day of the meet, which then increases the contact rate
I’ve also been putting up meets daily saying anyone interested in meeting Saturday but then I just get loads of message saying I’m free now!! don’t think people read they just see meet and send a message "
Why would you put up ad's daily for one meet on Saturday? You only need to post one. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just don’t take it so seriously, there are people on here who think they know how it all works but they aren’t you. Just go with the flow and if it works great if not at least you tried x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"but your profile is pretty barren except the text...I dunno what you expect to be honest. Plus you state that you want build up rapport prior to any potential meet...
then the last part..only meet with partner(I will always assume when I read this that the person in question may not actually be controlling their own profile),so I'll effectively jumping through hoops for some guys interpretation of what he wants the meet to like.
Either YOU have to change the way you intend to meet or stop complaining its not going your way.
If a single man had posted the thread, he would have instantly been told how effectively empty his profile is to acquire potential meets."
I emptied yesterday coz I was fed up and just starting to put stuff back on, it changes daily with my mood
And anyway I’m not complaining just stating that having hundreds of messages is no better than having very few. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"but your profile is pretty barren except the text...I dunno what you expect to be honest. Plus you state that you want build up rapport prior to any potential meet...
then the last part..only meet with partner(I will always assume when I read this that the person in question may not actually be controlling their own profile),so I'll effectively jumping through hoops for some guys interpretation of what he wants the meet to like.
Either YOU have to change the way you intend to meet or stop complaining its not going your way.
If a single man had posted the thread, he would have instantly been told how effectively empty his profile is to acquire potential meets.
I emptied yesterday coz I was fed up and just starting to put stuff back on, it changes daily with my mood
And anyway I’m not complaining just stating that having hundreds of messages is no better than having very few. "
lol dammit..so I missed perving already grr |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Also I don’t need any profile advice as I’ve been on her for 6 years and believe me my profile has been everything from funny and bubbly, sarcastic, lists of desires, short, long.... you name it I’ve tried it, it makes no difference to the quality of men or amount of messages.
I put will fill in later a few weeks ago and I got about 800 messages in a day  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Pick 5 people that have messaged. Chat to them. If no one suits pick another 5. Keep going till you get someone whos chat you like. Its really not that hard x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve also been putting up meets daily saying anyone interested in meeting Saturday but then I just get loads of message saying I’m free now!! don’t think people read they just see meet and send a message "
Saturday is a good filter as it tends to remove all the singles on here who are actually attached. The number of offers seem to be closely related to whether you are available 9-5 Mon-Fri. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Also I don’t need any profile advice as I’ve been on her for 6 years and believe me my profile has been everything from funny and bubbly, sarcastic, lists of desires, short, long.... you name it I’ve tried it, it makes no difference to the quality of men or amount of messages.
I put will fill in later a few weeks ago and I got about 800 messages in a day "
You get 800 messages a day from men from manchester age between 30-49? X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why don't you make more of an effort by putting up a picture or two?
I know that the general consensus is that single women don't have to but the truth is that decent guys are more likely to approach what they percieve as women who have made a bit of an effort.
Honestly I hate putting up pics because I get too many messages which makes it harder (I’ve just uploaded one but am wondering whether to post it). Even if I put a pic of my hand the messages flood in, I assume it’s becauce in the search filter you can select those with profile pics on show so the foot flow increases 10 fold!"
That's a fair comment and to a degree I suppose it just goes with the territory.
Maybe you should put your filters up or hide your profile and do your own prospecting. It may give you another perspective. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why will it be too late saturday if you're only putting up a meet now. Get everything waxed in anticipation of prince charming getting in touch sat afternoon and youre away |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Why will it be too late saturday if you're only putting up a meet now. Get everything waxed in anticipation of prince charming getting in touch sat afternoon and youre away "
Mean if they messaged Saturday it’d be too late, and oh no I’m not doing all that work for nothing |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Also I don’t need any profile advice as I’ve been on her for 6 years and believe me my profile has been everything from funny and bubbly, sarcastic, lists of desires, short, long.... you name it I’ve tried it, it makes no difference to the quality of men or amount of messages.
I put will fill in later a few weeks ago and I got about 800 messages in a day
You get 800 messages a day from men from manchester age between 30-49? X"
I got (past tense) in one day yes, it’s usually around 100 a lot bring the same people over and over and no not between 30-49 that’s my preference but I don’t have filters up as I’d happily meet a 25 or 55 year old if I liked them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Also I don’t need any profile advice as I’ve been on her for 6 years and believe me my profile has been everything from funny and bubbly, sarcastic, lists of desires, short, long.... you name it I’ve tried it, it makes no difference to the quality of men or amount of messages.
I put will fill in later a few weeks ago and I got about 800 messages in a day
You get 800 messages a day from men from manchester age between 30-49? X
I got (past tense) in one day yes, it’s usually around 100 a lot bring the same people over and over and no not between 30-49 that’s my preference but I don’t have filters up as I’d happily meet a 25 or 55 year old if I liked them."
Theres a big difference between 100 and 800 pmsl
Put your own search in. Have a look. Block who you don't like and put a meet up. There cant be that many men in manchester on this site surely. I done a search in manchester with your age with 1 interest and it came up 209 results. Its not really that hard doll x |
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"but your profile is pretty barren except the text...I dunno what you expect to be honest. Plus you state that you want build up rapport prior to any potential meet...
then the last part..only meet with partner(I will always assume when I read this that the person in question may not actually be controlling their own profile),so I'll effectively jumping through hoops for some guys interpretation of what he wants the meet to like.
Either YOU have to change the way you intend to meet or stop complaining its not going your way.
If a single man had posted the thread, he would have instantly been told how effectively empty his profile is to acquire potential meets."
Absolutely agree |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've just read your profile
I no longer live in Manchester so this is a bit academic.
And as you haven't asked for profile advice I will give none...
Save for...
If you only meet with your partner why are you using a singles profile and why is it the last line of your profile. Are you hoping single guys don't read that far! |
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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago
Hillside desolate |
"I've just read your profile
I no longer live in Manchester so this is a bit academic.
And as you haven't asked for profile advice I will give none...
Save for...
If you only meet with your partner why are you using a singles profile and why is it the last line of your profile. Are you hoping single guys don't read that far! "
It says "anyone other than single males I will only meet with my partner" so she's only looking to meet single males one on one, is my interpretation of that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Also I don’t need any profile advice as I’ve been on her for 6 years and believe me my profile has been everything from funny and bubbly, sarcastic, lists of desires, short, long.... you name it I’ve tried it, it makes no difference to the quality of men or amount of messages.
I put will fill in later a few weeks ago and I got about 800 messages in a day
You get 800 messages a day from men from manchester age between 30-49? X
I got (past tense) in one day yes, it’s usually around 100 a lot bring the same people over and over and no not between 30-49 that’s my preference but I don’t have filters up as I’d happily meet a 25 or 55 year old if I liked them."
Yeah I've found the same. If I have very little text I get up to 100 messages a day. I've killed it now by saying no quickie meets- obviously some men DO read profiles because when change it the mail changes.
I've also found the same as you said up the thread- I've tried looking but it's pointless. I've mailed even very short profiles hoping that some might be ok but no.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP how about doing an experiment? Do a chatty mail then send it (copy & paste) to 100 profiles nearby that don't totally put you off. See what replies you get.
I've tried this before as some men have no profile because they're crap online but are really nice guys. You might get chatting to someone and find someone suitable.
I've done this before and found a couple of men I was compatible with. |
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