FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Your definition of submissive?
Your definition of submissive?
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Now this is potentially quite an open subject, but I’m curious to understand peoples thoughts around definition of submissiveness from a male and female perspective? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Ok... every submissive is different, as is every dominant. For me though, submission is about being respected and in return, I offer myself to you for your pleasure ... which in turn, also pleasures me.
As a submissive I want to show you just how important you are, how much respect I have for you, how much I want you and how much I trust you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
In all honesty I don't think there is any single definition even for an individual in some cases - submissiveness may manifest itself in different ways with different people.
For me personally it's very much related to reliquishing control for a defined period - allowing someone else to take the lead. Now within that there are of course defined limits and likes and dislikes but the overriding factor is the control element. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
There is no definitive answer. Every person, every relationship and every dynamic is different.
Some people are just physically submissive. Some are obedient. Some need a bit of coercion.
To me a "submissive" is someone who allows another person to help them find sexual gratification by exploring together. I'd also say the same about a "Dom". |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *lceeWoman
over a year ago
Leeds |
Gawd...this is about as broad as it gets!
For me, a submissive is someone who surrenders control of their body (whether just in the bedroom or 24/7) to another person.
That could be in many different ways and flavours but in essence, this is it for me.
I love being a sub  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So to you women - would you say that in general life you are quite head strong and domineering and your flip to being submissive is a realise from that? "
I am a very headstrong person in general life |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *lceeWoman
over a year ago
Leeds |
"So to you women - would you say that in general life you are quite head strong and domineering and your flip to being submissive is a realise from that?
I am a very headstrong person in general life "
Me too, but it’s not a release from that...it’s just who I am. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
So to you ladies - would you say that in general life you’re all quite headstrong and domineering and that the flip to being submissive is a release from that normality and a chance to be controlled? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *anther PurrrsWoman
over a year ago
the Shadows Purrring or Roaring |
"So to you women - would you say that in general life you are quite head strong and domineering and your flip to being submissive is a realise from that? "
I would totally agree with that statement....
the release from having to be in control and handing it over to someone you trust. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"So to you women - would you say that in general life you are quite head strong and domineering and your flip to being submissive is a realise from that?
I am a very headstrong person in general life
Me too, but it’s not a release from that...it’s just who I am. "
Perhaps this quote may resonate with some of you...
“It's hard for an educated woman to turn her head off. That's part of the joy of being a submissive. None of the decisions are yours. When you can't refuse anything and can't even move, those voices in your head go silent. All you can do, and all you are permitted to do, is feel.” |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Erm.
I'd say in a general way that it's two people in a sexual relationship where there's enough trust, respect and safety for one of those people to pass their sexual control and power to the other person.
I'm quite headstrong and determined to keep control in my own life, so finding someone I trust enough to pass that power to relaxes and soothes me so much. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So to you women - would you say that in general life you are quite head strong and domineering and your flip to being submissive is a realise from that?
I am a very headstrong person in general life
Me too, but it’s not a release from that...it’s just who I am. "
Agree with this ... it’s not that I hand over the control, I’m just naturally sexually submissive |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *anther PurrrsWoman
over a year ago
the Shadows Purrring or Roaring |
"So to you women - would you say that in general life you are quite head strong and domineering and your flip to being submissive is a realise from that?
I am a very headstrong person in general life
Me too, but it’s not a release from that...it’s just who I am.
Perhaps this quote may resonate with some of you...
“It's hard for an educated woman to turn her head off. That's part of the joy of being a submissive. None of the decisions are yours. When you can't refuse anything and can't even move, those voices in your head go silent. All you can do, and all you are permitted to do, is feel.”"
Still have the right to refuse.... a respectful dom knows the woman’s limits. My view personally |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"In all honesty I don't think there is any single definition even for an individual in some cases - submissiveness may manifest itself in different ways with different people.
For me personally it's very much related to reliquishing control for a defined period - allowing someone else to take the lead. Now within that there are of course defined limits and likes and dislikes but the overriding factor is the control element. "
I agree with this. Handing over control for a little while and letting go. Lovely. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So to you women - would you say that in general life you are quite head strong and domineering and your flip to being submissive is a realise from that?
I am a very headstrong person in general life
Me too, but it’s not a release from that...it’s just who I am.
Perhaps this quote may resonate with some of you...
“It's hard for an educated woman to turn her head off. That's part of the joy of being a submissive. None of the decisions are yours. When you can't refuse anything and can't even move, those voices in your head go silent. All you can do, and all you are permitted to do, is feel.”
Still have the right to refuse.... a respectful dom knows the woman’s limits. My view personally "
I agree with this. Too many men think it's simply them in charge, lots of pain and rough fucking. Not necessarily the case. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So to you women - would you say that in general life you are quite head strong and domineering and your flip to being submissive is a realise from that?
I am a very headstrong person in general life
Me too, but it’s not a release from that...it’s just who I am.
Perhaps this quote may resonate with some of you...
“It's hard for an educated woman to turn her head off. That's part of the joy of being a submissive. None of the decisions are yours. When you can't refuse anything and can't even move, those voices in your head go silent. All you can do, and all you are permitted to do, is feel.”
Still have the right to refuse.... a respectful dom knows the woman’s limits. My view personally
I agree with this. Too many men think it's simply them in charge, lots of pain and rough fucking. Not necessarily the case. "
That’s because too many men hide behind the dominant label, when really they are just bullies... the amount of men on here who message me with no respect what so ever and use the “I’m a dom” line is unbelievable. I also think they don’t understand that submissive can be a world apart from each other... I absolutely HATE being referred to as a sub slut, whore etc, but some subs get off on that |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So to you women - would you say that in general life you are quite head strong and domineering and your flip to being submissive is a realise from that?
I am a very headstrong person in general life
Me too, but it’s not a release from that...it’s just who I am.
Perhaps this quote may resonate with some of you...
“It's hard for an educated woman to turn her head off. That's part of the joy of being a submissive. None of the decisions are yours. When you can't refuse anything and can't even move, those voices in your head go silent. All you can do, and all you are permitted to do, is feel.”
Still have the right to refuse.... a respectful dom knows the woman’s limits. My view personally
I agree with this. Too many men think it's simply them in charge, lots of pain and rough fucking. Not necessarily the case.
That’s because too many men hide behind the dominant label, when really they are just bullies... the amount of men on here who message me with no respect what so ever and use the “I’m a dom” line is unbelievable. I also think they don’t understand that submissive can be a world apart from each other... I absolutely HATE being referred to as a sub slut, whore etc, but some subs get off on that "
I don't mention it on here anymore (I think S&M is still on my interests list) but if I'm planning on meeting someone I'll mention it but even then it doesn't necessarily mean that I'll wish to include it during a meet. Or even during sex with a regular partner away from fab. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"So to you women - would you say that in general life you are quite head strong and domineering and your flip to being submissive is a realise from that?
I am a very headstrong person in general life
Me too, but it’s not a release from that...it’s just who I am.
Perhaps this quote may resonate with some of you...
“It's hard for an educated woman to turn her head off. That's part of the joy of being a submissive. None of the decisions are yours. When you can't refuse anything and can't even move, those voices in your head go silent. All you can do, and all you are permitted to do, is feel.”
Still have the right to refuse.... a respectful dom knows the woman’s limits. My view personally
I agree with this. Too many men think it's simply them in charge, lots of pain and rough fucking. Not necessarily the case. "
Doesn’t have to be rough, doesn’t have to include pain, it simply involves trusting someone to take control so you can let go.
Within your boundaries and within a timeframe, the choices aren’t yours. But you always retain the power to stop the whole thing. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So to you women - would you say that in general life you are quite head strong and domineering and your flip to being submissive is a realise from that?
I am a very headstrong person in general life
Me too, but it’s not a release from that...it’s just who I am.
Perhaps this quote may resonate with some of you...
“It's hard for an educated woman to turn her head off. That's part of the joy of being a submissive. None of the decisions are yours. When you can't refuse anything and can't even move, those voices in your head go silent. All you can do, and all you are permitted to do, is feel.”
Still have the right to refuse.... a respectful dom knows the woman’s limits. My view personally
I agree with this. Too many men think it's simply them in charge, lots of pain and rough fucking. Not necessarily the case.
Doesn’t have to be rough, doesn’t have to include pain, it simply involves trusting someone to take control so you can let go.
Within your boundaries and within a timeframe, the choices aren’t yours. But you always retain the power to stop the whole thing. "
And it's so lovely when you find the person who makes you tick. Not that I don't like a small amount of pain, but I prefer the lighter pain. Nothing like having a rosy pink lightly stinging butt! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So to you women - would you say that in general life you are quite head strong and domineering and your flip to being submissive is a realise from that?
I am a very headstrong person in general life
Me too, but it’s not a release from that...it’s just who I am.
Perhaps this quote may resonate with some of you...
“It's hard for an educated woman to turn her head off. That's part of the joy of being a submissive. None of the decisions are yours. When you can't refuse anything and can't even move, those voices in your head go silent. All you can do, and all you are permitted to do, is feel.”
Still have the right to refuse.... a respectful dom knows the woman’s limits. My view personally
I agree with this. Too many men think it's simply them in charge, lots of pain and rough fucking. Not necessarily the case.
Doesn’t have to be rough, doesn’t have to include pain, it simply involves trusting someone to take control so you can let go.
Within your boundaries and within a timeframe, the choices aren’t yours. But you always retain the power to stop the whole thing. "
Very much this, trust is the key thing for me x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
The thing is just as there's no single definition of what a submissive (or for that matter a dominant) is - there's also no single definition of what D/s play should or shouldn't involve other than that defined by the two (or more) people in a particular scene/relationship etc.
Unfortunately though the outside and uninformed view of D/s is that it's whips and chains and the submissive doing what they're told without question, and that's always been the case, sadly that uninformed view has been further reinforced by the likes of "that" book and the general porn representation of BDSM, which leads to some of the ignorance you see from people calling themselves "Dom".
Dominance and submission is as much a mindset and mental thing as it is anything else - there are some people I just feel naturally submissive to, I can't just be submissive to anyone that calls themselves Dom/me. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Now this is potentially quite an open subject, but I’m curious to understand peoples thoughts around definition of submissiveness from a male and female perspective? "
The choice to give up control to another  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"The thing is just as there's no single definition of what a submissive (or for that matter a dominant) is - there's also no single definition of what D/s play should or shouldn't involve other than that defined by the two (or more) people in a particular scene/relationship etc.
Unfortunately though the outside and uninformed view of D/s is that it's whips and chains and the submissive doing what they're told without question, and that's always been the case, sadly that uninformed view has been further reinforced by the likes of "that" book and the general porn representation of BDSM, which leads to some of the ignorance you see from people calling themselves "Dom".
Dominance and submission is as much a mindset and mental thing as it is anything else - there are some people I just feel naturally submissive to, I can't just be submissive to anyone that calls themselves Dom/me."
Very good point - again I’m totally with you. It’s so much more. I find it quite spiritual and enlightening when I connect with the right person!! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
it’s not my place to say 
