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Total head melt

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By *ncrath OP   Man  over a year ago

Hull (ish)

Fab peeps .... kinda asking for help as I don't know WHAT to think......

Just literally had my brother around here who's just told me he's leaving his wife and kids reason being he's.... I'll be blunt doing my old flame .....

Long story short we were never a proper couple but we had true connection and were fucking exclusively for a few years .

Not been anywhere near the girl for over a year, yet stay in touch ..... ish.... I kinda knew something was going on . But to hear the truth cuts ..... okay.....okay..... I know this isn't taking about butt plugs, anal , bondage or threesome but I had to vent.

I know I'm probably gonna get a load of shit for posting this... but again I'm venting.

My head is a bit of a mess right now and I'd honestly like some humble ... straight , advise as I kept my cool yet I'm actually raging inside???

Legit responses please guys and girls ... your my dear Deirdre tonight ? I'm not one to usually post this dribble so hope for some honest advise? not abuse calling out the humans inside u all not the inner perverts like me xxx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think you are best steering away from the situation. I can understand the impact but if you can stay away from all concerned I think you'd be better off.

Your brother is in a far worse place, look after yourself. He can be supported from afar or not at all.

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By *ncrath OP   Man  over a year ago

Hull (ish)


"I think you are best steering away from the situation. I can understand the impact but if you can stay away from all concerned I think you'd be better off.

Your brother is in a far worse place, look after yourself. He can be supported from afar or not at all."

Kinda here ya James. Bitvthanks for the response.

I'm literally sat on the fence right now as he walked away I'm thinking ' go fuck yourself you idiot' yet also your my brother I'll always be there for you and your family ( kids) ???

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

They have made a choice and, like your brother's family, it puts you in the middle.

I assume you care about your brother (I hope you do) and you care about this woman, or at least did, so it will take time to accept them as a couple.

Don't do anything rash, including giving in to any pressure from them for your 'blessing' and let them establish themselves. Be there if your brother needs you as he is the one likely to still be in your life, one way or another, if it doesn't work out, and leave her alone but treat her with respect as your brother's partner.

Don't abandon your brother's children as they are your nieces/nephews but be gently in the background. Resist the temptation to have sex with his ex-partner (it happens).

Rant away on here.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think you are best steering away from the situation. I can understand the impact but if you can stay away from all concerned I think you'd be better off.

Your brother is in a far worse place, look after yourself. He can be supported from afar or not at all.

Kinda here ya James. Bitvthanks for the response.

I'm literally sat on the fence right now as he walked away I'm thinking ' go fuck yourself you idiot' yet also your my brother I'll always be there for you and your family ( kids) ??? "

The family connection is understandable. I'd say "what can I do for the kids" and help that way. The rest sounds like a recipe for a mess. Your ex may be trying to involve you as well. Feelings are understandable but you're better off out of it and look after the kids where you can.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman  over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"I think you are best steering away from the situation. I can understand the impact but if you can stay away from all concerned I think you'd be better off.

Your brother is in a far worse place, look after yourself. He can be supported from afar or not at all.

Kinda here ya James. Bitvthanks for the response.

I'm literally sat on the fence right now as he walked away I'm thinking ' go fuck yourself you idiot' yet also your my brother I'll always be there for you and your family ( kids) ???

The family connection is understandable. I'd say "what can I do for the kids" and help that way. The rest sounds like a recipe for a mess. Your ex may be trying to involve you as well. Feelings are understandable but you're better off out of it and look after the kids where you can."

Good advice here, think of the kids, they have to come first x

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By *ncrath OP   Man  over a year ago

Hull (ish)

_icketysplits

Many thanks for that miss splits xx

I assure you I won't be dabbling with his ex ( not my type !)

His kids are a priority to keep in my life they are wonderful lil buggers ! Haha

Right now feeling I'm gonna just take a bbbiiigggg back step and bury my head in the sand ?!?!?!

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By *olgateMan  over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

You probably need distance from them both in the short term

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By *ncrath OP   Man  over a year ago

Hull (ish)

James , ms gives woods ... your so right.... tiss the kids all the way isn't it . Poor lil sods.

Trust me I know. I was married my youngest is now 6'2" !!! Xx

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By *ncrath OP   Man  over a year ago

Hull (ish)


"You probably need distance from them both in the short term"

Thinking I'll do just that for now bud.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Gday

My thoughts ....

Priority - support your brother - he is an adult and it’s his decision

Next priority - support your niece and nephew

Following priority - recognise you are not with his new Lady, you have no rights or reason to feel any distress. It’s a bit like he loves going to where u holidayed yet u don’t go there anymore or you loved a certain footie team and now he follows them and you play golf instead....You both may have similar likes and she was / is one of them.

If in ur opinion ur brothers decision is rash ....then ask him to take some time otherwise support is ur role.

Xx

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By *ophieslutTV/TS  over a year ago

Central

Rest and sleep.

Tomorrow is another day, when you can create some boundaries, keeping yourself sane.

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By *risky_MareWoman  over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"Gday

My thoughts ....

Priority - support your brother - he is an adult and it’s his decision

Next priority - support your niece and nephew

Following priority - recognise you are not with his new Lady, you have no rights or reason to feel any distress. It’s a bit like he loves going to where u holidayed yet u don’t go there anymore or you loved a certain footie team and now he follows them and you play golf instead....You both may have similar likes and she was / is one of them.

"

Good analogy.

I think we all have unwritten boundaries in our lives that we hope people never cross, and that feel like a violation when they do cross. We react emotionally as if there has been a trangression, and in some ways in our spirit there has been, our hopes have been dashed.......and yet there was no real boundary. Sassy is right, she was in your past.

I would say yes, you're in a bit of shock at the moment, keep your head down until you've had a chance to process it all and gain a good perspective.

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