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NSA FWB - does it exist
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It may be possible for some. But I see it as having a short expiration date. It starts to curdle after a while. Especially if both parties are exclusive. |
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It requires a hard to find blend of two (or more?) people who are motivated to fuck, etc. - enough so that they seek each other occasionally for said fucking - BUT who are not at all motivated for anything else, any other desires, interests, etc with one another. That's hard to find, as the desire to fuck often comes with the desire to do other things. And many people are terrible at 'feeling all the feelings' that accompany all things sexual whilst also understanding that the feelings can be contained. We tend to get leaky and sex can bond us in unexpected ways, especially if we play with trust, edges, and boundaries. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it is hard to set your boundaries sometimes. I now have a permanent playmate who is poly, so has 4 of us who adore him- so I'm learning to compartmentalise. When we spend time together, I indulge in all the emotions as well as the physical sensations, and enjoy our social time at events and going out to dinner etc. We keep in touch regularly when we aren't meeting but I put up more of a wall then as I know the "leaky stuff" can get tricky. Still get a tiny bit jealous of the others on occasion, though we all know about each other |
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The whole point of a FWB is that you are a friend. That is not nsa. The string is the friendship, the benefits is the sex part. Think what you are describing is a fuck and go arrangement. Devoid of anything other than sex. Works for some. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The whole point of a FWB is that you are a friend. That is not nsa. The string is the friendship, the benefits is the sex part. Think what you are describing is a fuck and go arrangement. Devoid of anything other than sex. Works for some."
Basically fuck buddies. That's why a FWB arrangement is a little more tricky. The care is supposed to be there. I care for mine. Though I'm aware that it will end ![](/icons/s/biggrin.gif) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When I was single I couldn't do it!
One or the other got too attached or got bored!
Perhaps it works if you have a few and only see them occasionally? Then I guess they aren't fuck buddies any more? |
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"The whole point of a FWB is that you are a friend. That is not nsa. The string is the friendship, the benefits is the sex part. Think what you are describing is a fuck and go arrangement. Devoid of anything other than sex. Works for some.
Basically fuck buddies. That's why a FWB arrangement is a little more tricky. The care is supposed to be there. I care for mine. Though I'm aware that it will end "
Yeh I have a FWB but I know if the 'benefits' bit ends the friendship will hopefully still be there. Had a FB situation which suited me. Was definitely only about sex on both parts. Now thats stopped have nothing to do with each other. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A fwb works for me, but I don't think what the OP describes is a fwb as a fwb does come with strings but strings that you should both want.
It doesn't mean you have to end up with being more however, I enjoy great intimacy and trust with someone but I'm definitely still single. We just get to enjoy the best bits of each other and exploring with others together. |
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"When I was single I couldn't do it!
One or the other got too attached or got bored!
Perhaps it works if you have a few and only see them occasionally? Then I guess they aren't fuck buddies any more?" exactly x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Depends on how much of a friendship you want.
I've found that men want the regular sex without any of the friendship; which is fine by me, as long as they don't assume I will be available every time they want me. |
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"Depends on how much of a friendship you want.
I've found that men want the regular sex without any of the friendship; which is fine by me, as long as they don't assume I will be available every time they want me. " as long as you both accept it, I haven't found it yet though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think there may be a clue in the word "friends" ...
Don't you OP?dont think it's quite that literal "
You want a fuck buddy. You don't have to be friends with them. |
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"a fwb does come with strings but strings that you should both want.
It doesn't mean you have to end up with being more however, I enjoy great intimacy and trust with someone but I'm definitely still single. We just get to enjoy the best bits of each other and exploring with others together."
^^^ this is what I'm finding very elusive to establish with someone |
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"a fwb does come with strings but strings that you should both want.
It doesn't mean you have to end up with being more however, I enjoy great intimacy and trust with someone but I'm definitely still single. We just get to enjoy the best bits of each other and exploring with others together.
^^^ this is what I'm finding very elusive to establish with someone "
It is difficult to establish that because you really have to find the right minded person. Plus it has to be properly communicated. Boundaries agreed. Regular discussions about feelings and emotions just to make sure things aren’t getting a bit too much. The trust is a big thing because what is often the case with FWB is that the pair of friends will be intimate with each other more often and also perhaps safe sex doesn’t become as important. If one or both parties is having sex with others as well then it might be important to do regular check ups.
With one of my FWB last year we used to go to the clinic every month together to both get checked out. It really strengthened our friendship. |
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"a fwb does come with strings but strings that you should both want.
It doesn't mean you have to end up with being more however, I enjoy great intimacy and trust with someone but I'm definitely still single. We just get to enjoy the best bits of each other and exploring with others together.
^^^ this is what I'm finding very elusive to establish with someone " are you looking? |
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"FWB NSA has a shelf life, feelings inevitably creep in at some point. If it’s only one way feelings then someone gets hurt"
It really does depend... because if both parties are mature enough to actually have conversations - even difficult ones at times - then it can last for a very long time.
I’ve been spending time with a particular woman in my local area for over three years now and we still manage to have good fun. We’ve also been through all the ups and downs as well. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I tried the no strings with benefits but found it impossible...so far. Is it possible?
Fb yes
Fwb no"
Fb was great.
Fwb fell in love with me..... not so great. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I tried the no strings with benefits but found it impossible...so far. Is it possible?
Fb yes
Fwb no
Fb was great.
Fwb fell in love with me..... not so great."
Same lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I tried the no strings with benefits but found it impossible...so far. Is it possible?
Fb yes
Fwb no
Fb was great.
Fwb fell in love with me..... not so great.
Same lol"
That sucks..... the sex was great. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I tried the no strings with benefits but found it impossible...so far. Is it possible?
Fb yes
Fwb no
Fb was great.
Fwb fell in love with me..... not so great.
Same lol
That sucks..... the sex was great."
Dont lol
But I won’t go back |
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