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Sometimes, don't you just wish the ground would open and swallow you up?
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By *educed OP Woman
over a year ago
Birmingham |
I've a communal laundery area where I live on the first floor and so most mornings, I take my laundry down with me as I'm leaving for work, and collect when I'm home from work.
I grabbed a pile this morning, put it into the machine and set off to work. Nothing extraordinary about that except I'm was on the bus and I found a pair of knickers tucked half in and half out of my scarf (but very very visible).   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've a communal laundery area where I live on the first floor and so most mornings, I take my laundry down with me as I'm leaving for work, and collect when I'm home from work.
I grabbed a pile this morning, put it into the machine and set off to work. Nothing extraordinary about that except I'm was on the bus and I found a pair of knickers tucked half in and half out of my scarf (but very very visible). "
I got halfway to work once and realised I had yesterday's knickers hanging out the bottom of my trouser leg |
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Some mornings, I'm halfway to the bus stop and have to look down to check that I am, indeed, wearing a shirt (so far so good).
I tend to throw on whatever is to hand, and some mornings, in an effort to not wake Mr Twee by turning on the lights, my color coordination leaves a bit to be desired.
My biggest "wish a hole would open and swallow me whole" moment was years ago when a customer invited me out for coffee after work one day. We'd chatted for months, and as a naturally flirty person, I assumed it was a date.
I laid it on heavily while out....turns out he was gay (for once I couldn't tell), and coffee was meant to be just coffee. He didn't come back into my shop for months. |
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I was working on a big winch mounted on a truck for a gliding club and was being assisted by a few guys. Great bunch, lots of banter with them lending a hand where I needed it but they were mostly standing around drinking beers. Working underneath the truck in an awkward position I called out for someone to help me manoeuvre a piece of gear into place and an arm appeared to help..... only it was flesh coloured rubber and looked like one of those lifelike fisting dildos. I burst out laughing at this joke and grabbed it to wrestle it away from the prankster....
....only to find that it was a genuine prosthetic limb and was attached to the upper arm of one of the flying instructors. |
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By *educed OP Woman
over a year ago
Birmingham |
"I was working on a big winch mounted on a truck for a gliding club and was being assisted by a few guys. Great bunch, lots of banter with them lending a hand where I needed it but they were mostly standing around drinking beers. Working underneath the truck in an awkward position I called out for someone to help me manoeuvre a piece of gear into place and an arm appeared to help..... only it was flesh coloured rubber and looked like one of those lifelike fisting dildos. I burst out laughing at this joke and grabbed it to wrestle it away from the prankster....
....only to find that it was a genuine prosthetic limb and was attached to the upper arm of one of the flying instructors. "
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By *educed OP Woman
over a year ago
Birmingham |
"Some mornings, I'm halfway to the bus stop and have to look down to check that I am, indeed, wearing a shirt (so far so good).
I tend to throw on whatever is to hand, and some mornings, in an effort to not wake Mr Twee by turning on the lights, my color coordination leaves a bit to be desired.
My biggest "wish a hole would open and swallow me whole" moment was years ago when a customer invited me out for coffee after work one day. We'd chatted for months, and as a naturally flirty person, I assumed it was a date.
I laid it on heavily while out....turns out he was gay (for once I couldn't tell), and coffee was meant to be just coffee. He didn't come back into my shop for months."
Did you use all your best lines on him? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was walking around shops in Westfield a couple of Christmases ago with my jumper on inside out.
I went to the back of a big store and changed it around, then realised there was a cctv camera right over my head. |
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"Some mornings, I'm halfway to the bus stop and have to look down to check that I am, indeed, wearing a shirt (so far so good).
I tend to throw on whatever is to hand, and some mornings, in an effort to not wake Mr Twee by turning on the lights, my color coordination leaves a bit to be desired.
My biggest "wish a hole would open and swallow me whole" moment was years ago when a customer invited me out for coffee after work one day. We'd chatted for months, and as a naturally flirty person, I assumed it was a date.
I laid it on heavily while out....turns out he was gay (for once I couldn't tell), and coffee was meant to be just coffee. He didn't come back into my shop for months.
Did you use all your best lines on him? "
Unfortunately...yes.... |
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