FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Small talk opening messages.
Small talk opening messages.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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In the words of Mr Data "I am attempting to fill a silent moment with non relevant conversation".
Maybe it's just being tired or maybe we had a moment of extreme clarity....
When the dreaded "how are you" or any other single like non-punctuated series of words hits our inbox....
The other person has effectively put all the onus on us to generate the conversation as if we'd sent the initial contact. Usually it doesn't even qualify as a sentence. There's rarely a capital at the start or a question mark at the end. It's just a few words. If we reply to the not-question with a single word not-answer and it kills the conversation; does that make us the bad guy? |
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Yup..... Entirely your fault you evil people. I mean that person took the time to write that single word out letter by letter just so you'd see it and comeback with the complete works of Shakespeare 
(I'm definitely NOT being serious by the way  ) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In the words of Mr Data "I am attempting to fill a silent moment with non relevant conversation".
Maybe it's just being tired or maybe we had a moment of extreme clarity....
When the dreaded "how are you" or any other single like non-punctuated series of words hits our inbox....
The other person has effectively put all the onus on us to generate the conversation as if we'd sent the initial contact. Usually it doesn't even qualify as a sentence. There's rarely a capital at the start or a question mark at the end. It's just a few words. If we reply to the not-question with a single word not-answer and it kills the conversation; does that make us the bad guy?"
afraid it does and in this world you're going to have to get used to abbreviations and text talk ,if you want to meet sexy people lighten up and interact because unfortunately women are the worst for sending short replies and most want to meet a woman .  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I quite like they messages. It lets me tell them what I'm up to and gives them an idea of how I want the chat. I've always had great conversations on here and meets because of they messages. I can usually gage if I want to continue the chat with their reponse x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"how r u this morningI'm good ,you?
Ye what's plan for the day ?
Jus’ chillin"
not working,me neither but going out to town for a bit going to a party Sunday need some new duds gotta look smart |
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"how r u this morningI'm good ,you?
Ye what's plan for the day ?
Jus’ chillinnot working,me neither but going out to town for a bit going to a party Sunday need some new duds gotta look smart "
Cool |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"how r u this morningI'm good ,you?
Ye what's plan for the day ?
Jus’ chillinnot working,me neither but going out to town for a bit going to a party Sunday need some new duds gotta look smart
Cool"
plans for weekend? |
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"how r u this morningI'm good ,you?
Ye what's plan for the day ?
Jus’ chillinnot working,me neither but going out to town for a bit going to a party Sunday need some new duds gotta look smart
Coolplans for weekend? "
Yep |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"how r u this morningI'm good ,you?
Ye what's plan for the day ?
Jus’ chillinnot working,me neither but going out to town for a bit going to a party Sunday need some new duds gotta look smart
Coolplans for weekend?
Yep"
spill then ,are they exciting plans ? |
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies "
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies "
That would do my head in lol
What's dud's btw x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
That would do my head in lol
What's dud's btw x"
clothes need new clothes ha |
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Hi on it’s own is definitely a delete - it shows no imagination. How are you, blank profile and no pics is another delete.
But if someone has something I can use in their profile I’ll reply and see how the conversation goes. I do tend to find those are often the ones that dry up more quickly but not always. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
That would do my head in lol
What's dud's btw xclothes need new clothes ha "
Ah ok. Smart? Casual? X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!"
but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them |
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them "
That’s true, but if there’s no connection in messages (and no real attempt) then we have found there’s unlikely to be any connection in person. Just our experience... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them
That’s true, but if there’s no connection in messages (and no real attempt) then we have found there’s unlikely to be any connection in person. Just our experience..."
Yip. I go purely by the chat. Sex or boring chat I will polietly end the conversation. Chat that flows I will carry on. If they are witty and the chat is on the same wavelength I will meet. Can chat for a good while before seeing a pic x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them
That’s true, but if there’s no connection in messages (and no real attempt) then we have found there’s unlikely to be any connection in person. Just our experience...
Yip. I go purely by the chat. Sex or boring chat I will polietly end the conversation. Chat that flows I will carry on. If they are witty and the chat is on the same wavelength I will meet. Can chat for a good while before seeing a pic x"
ok I get that I think I bring witty to the table and I'm certainly a chatterbox which I am anyways,I chat to everyone even the cat ha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them
That’s true, but if there’s no connection in messages (and no real attempt) then we have found there’s unlikely to be any connection in person. Just our experience...
Yip. I go purely by the chat. Sex or boring chat I will polietly end the conversation. Chat that flows I will carry on. If they are witty and the chat is on the same wavelength I will meet. Can chat for a good while before seeing a pic xok I get that I think I bring witty to the table and I'm certainly a chatterbox which I am anyways,I chat to everyone even the cat ha "
There's a fine line tho lol x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them
That’s true, but if there’s no connection in messages (and no real attempt) then we have found there’s unlikely to be any connection in person. Just our experience..."
I agree your profile and your messages are your advert if you don't make an effort you won't get a meet simple as but some people no names mentioned don't have to try ever |
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them
That’s true, but if there’s no connection in messages (and no real attempt) then we have found there’s unlikely to be any connection in person. Just our experience...I agree your profile and your messages are your advert if you don't make an effort you won't get a meet simple as but some people no names mentioned don't have to try ever "
Whoever they are (or think they are), no effort means no chance with us. We would rather spend that time with family, fuggle friends, and each other. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them
That’s true, but if there’s no connection in messages (and no real attempt) then we have found there’s unlikely to be any connection in person. Just our experience...
Yip. I go purely by the chat. Sex or boring chat I will polietly end the conversation. Chat that flows I will carry on. If they are witty and the chat is on the same wavelength I will meet. Can chat for a good while before seeing a pic xok I get that I think I bring witty to the table and I'm certainly a chatterbox which I am anyways,I chat to everyone even the cat ha
There's a fine line tho lol x"
well yes their is because I imagine couples like yourself get a lot of messages and its so easy to say based on reading a message with a negative bias when it wasn't meant that way at all we'll move on now and say goodbye to that person |
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them
That’s true, but if there’s no connection in messages (and no real attempt) then we have found there’s unlikely to be any connection in person. Just our experience...
Yip. I go purely by the chat. Sex or boring chat I will polietly end the conversation. Chat that flows I will carry on. If they are witty and the chat is on the same wavelength I will meet. Can chat for a good while before seeing a pic xok I get that I think I bring witty to the table and I'm certainly a chatterbox which I am anyways,I chat to everyone even the cat ha
There's a fine line tho lol xwell yes their is because I imagine couples like yourself get a lot of messages and its so easy to say based on reading a message with a negative bias when it wasn't meant that way at all we'll move on now and say goodbye to that person "
No not at all - we usually make the first move. I think you may be confusing couples with Unicorns. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them
That’s true, but if there’s no connection in messages (and no real attempt) then we have found there’s unlikely to be any connection in person. Just our experience...I agree your profile and your messages are your advert if you don't make an effort you won't get a meet simple as but some people no names mentioned don't have to try ever
Whoever they are (or think they are), no effort means no chance with us. We would rather spend that time with family, fuggle friends, and each other."
well that's good you have to have standards I think and expect people to be polite and make an effort I do everytime |
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them
That’s true, but if there’s no connection in messages (and no real attempt) then we have found there’s unlikely to be any connection in person. Just our experience...I agree your profile and your messages are your advert if you don't make an effort you won't get a meet simple as but some people no names mentioned don't have to try ever
Whoever they are (or think they are), no effort means no chance with us. We would rather spend that time with family, fuggle friends, and each other.well that's good you have to have standards I think and expect people to be polite and make an effort I do everytime "
And that’s a good attitude to have my friend, politeness, wit and a non-pushy approach go a long way... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them
That’s true, but if there’s no connection in messages (and no real attempt) then we have found there’s unlikely to be any connection in person. Just our experience...
Yip. I go purely by the chat. Sex or boring chat I will polietly end the conversation. Chat that flows I will carry on. If they are witty and the chat is on the same wavelength I will meet. Can chat for a good while before seeing a pic xok I get that I think I bring witty to the table and I'm certainly a chatterbox which I am anyways,I chat to everyone even the cat ha
There's a fine line tho lol xwell yes their is because I imagine couples like yourself get a lot of messages and its so easy to say based on reading a message with a negative bias when it wasn't meant that way at all we'll move on now and say goodbye to that person
No not at all - we usually make the first move. I think you may be confusing couples with Unicorns."
no I'm not confusing it with the desire to meet a single woman at all I know how difficult that meet is to organise ,I'm just saying couples as do females get many more messages than men do and so the amount of time dedicated to a reply has to be less in initial replies unless of course you are totally enamored and think oh my he's the bees knees must meet him ha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them
That’s true, but if there’s no connection in messages (and no real attempt) then we have found there’s unlikely to be any connection in person. Just our experience...I agree your profile and your messages are your advert if you don't make an effort you won't get a meet simple as but some people no names mentioned don't have to try ever
Whoever they are (or think they are), no effort means no chance with us. We would rather spend that time with family, fuggle friends, and each other.well that's good you have to have standards I think and expect people to be polite and make an effort I do everytime
And that’s a good attitude to have my friend, politeness, wit and a non-pushy approach go a long way..."
I try and hope I succeed |
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them
That’s true, but if there’s no connection in messages (and no real attempt) then we have found there’s unlikely to be any connection in person. Just our experience...
Yip. I go purely by the chat. Sex or boring chat I will polietly end the conversation. Chat that flows I will carry on. If they are witty and the chat is on the same wavelength I will meet. Can chat for a good while before seeing a pic xok I get that I think I bring witty to the table and I'm certainly a chatterbox which I am anyways,I chat to everyone even the cat ha
There's a fine line tho lol xwell yes their is because I imagine couples like yourself get a lot of messages and its so easy to say based on reading a message with a negative bias when it wasn't meant that way at all we'll move on now and say goodbye to that person
No not at all - we usually make the first move. I think you may be confusing couples with Unicorns.no I'm not confusing it with the desire to meet a single woman at all I know how difficult that meet is to organise ,I'm just saying couples as do females get many more messages than men do and so the amount of time dedicated to a reply has to be less in initial replies unless of course you are totally enamored and think oh my he's the bees knees must meet him ha "
It’s true we get messages, but maybe only 1 every couple of days. The occasional wink which starts an exchange. Unicorns I believe get lots every day...knowing a couple of those mythical creatures as we do. But then, we aren’t looking for single men and block them, so it would be different if we didn’t I suppose. It is a tough gig as a single man on fab, I know I’ve been one in the past, but perseverance does pay off usually. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them
That’s true, but if there’s no connection in messages (and no real attempt) then we have found there’s unlikely to be any connection in person. Just our experience...
Yip. I go purely by the chat. Sex or boring chat I will polietly end the conversation. Chat that flows I will carry on. If they are witty and the chat is on the same wavelength I will meet. Can chat for a good while before seeing a pic xok I get that I think I bring witty to the table and I'm certainly a chatterbox which I am anyways,I chat to everyone even the cat ha
There's a fine line tho lol xwell yes their is because I imagine couples like yourself get a lot of messages and its so easy to say based on reading a message with a negative bias when it wasn't meant that way at all we'll move on now and say goodbye to that person
No not at all - we usually make the first move. I think you may be confusing couples with Unicorns.no I'm not confusing it with the desire to meet a single woman at all I know how difficult that meet is to organise ,I'm just saying couples as do females get many more messages than men do and so the amount of time dedicated to a reply has to be less in initial replies unless of course you are totally enamored and think oh my he's the bees knees must meet him ha
It’s true we get messages, but maybe only 1 every couple of days. The occasional wink which starts an exchange. Unicorns I believe get lots every day...knowing a couple of those mythical creatures as we do. But then, we aren’t looking for single men and block them, so it would be different if we didn’t I suppose. It is a tough gig as a single man on fab, I know I’ve been one in the past, but perseverance does pay off usually."
I myself don't worry too much I'm a gent always and I have a unique sense of humour not everyone gets it but you are judged on your written word some because they have little time to do anything else are very quick to judge ,I say never judge a book by its cover but then I have time to say it |
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them
That’s true, but if there’s no connection in messages (and no real attempt) then we have found there’s unlikely to be any connection in person. Just our experience...
Yip. I go purely by the chat. Sex or boring chat I will polietly end the conversation. Chat that flows I will carry on. If they are witty and the chat is on the same wavelength I will meet. Can chat for a good while before seeing a pic xok I get that I think I bring witty to the table and I'm certainly a chatterbox which I am anyways,I chat to everyone even the cat ha
There's a fine line tho lol xwell yes their is because I imagine couples like yourself get a lot of messages and its so easy to say based on reading a message with a negative bias when it wasn't meant that way at all we'll move on now and say goodbye to that person
No not at all - we usually make the first move. I think you may be confusing couples with Unicorns.no I'm not confusing it with the desire to meet a single woman at all I know how difficult that meet is to organise ,I'm just saying couples as do females get many more messages than men do and so the amount of time dedicated to a reply has to be less in initial replies unless of course you are totally enamored and think oh my he's the bees knees must meet him ha
It’s true we get messages, but maybe only 1 every couple of days. The occasional wink which starts an exchange. Unicorns I believe get lots every day...knowing a couple of those mythical creatures as we do. But then, we aren’t looking for single men and block them, so it would be different if we didn’t I suppose. It is a tough gig as a single man on fab, I know I’ve been one in the past, but perseverance does pay off usually.I myself don't worry too much I'm a gent always and I have a unique sense of humour not everyone gets it but you are judged on your written word some because they have little time to do anything else are very quick to judge ,I say never judge a book by its cover but then I have time to say it "
And that is why that opening message is so important, nobody has the time or effort to pursue the person behind that message (unless they are bored or desperate) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No wonder people dont like messaging couples xI love messaging couples and can handle short positive replies
Well actually it was a piss take, but then you probably realised that. We hate this sort of exchange too. A complete and utter waste of time!but don't you think in initial messages you're not really into the person or persons concerned you're just really guaging whether they have a look you fancy at end of day we don't really know anyone until we meet them
That’s true, but if there’s no connection in messages (and no real attempt) then we have found there’s unlikely to be any connection in person. Just our experience...
Yip. I go purely by the chat. Sex or boring chat I will polietly end the conversation. Chat that flows I will carry on. If they are witty and the chat is on the same wavelength I will meet. Can chat for a good while before seeing a pic xok I get that I think I bring witty to the table and I'm certainly a chatterbox which I am anyways,I chat to everyone even the cat ha
There's a fine line tho lol xwell yes their is because I imagine couples like yourself get a lot of messages and its so easy to say based on reading a message with a negative bias when it wasn't meant that way at all we'll move on now and say goodbye to that person
No not at all - we usually make the first move. I think you may be confusing couples with Unicorns.no I'm not confusing it with the desire to meet a single woman at all I know how difficult that meet is to organise ,I'm just saying couples as do females get many more messages than men do and so the amount of time dedicated to a reply has to be less in initial replies unless of course you are totally enamored and think oh my he's the bees knees must meet him ha
It’s true we get messages, but maybe only 1 every couple of days. The occasional wink which starts an exchange. Unicorns I believe get lots every day...knowing a couple of those mythical creatures as we do. But then, we aren’t looking for single men and block them, so it would be different if we didn’t I suppose. It is a tough gig as a single man on fab, I know I’ve been one in the past, but perseverance does pay off usually.I myself don't worry too much I'm a gent always and I have a unique sense of humour not everyone gets it but you are judged on your written word some because they have little time to do anything else are very quick to judge ,I say never judge a book by its cover but then I have time to say it
And that is why that opening message is so important, nobody has the time or effort to pursue the person behind that message (unless they are bored or desperate)"
but surely being desperate if that is the right word only applies if you actually perpetuate a desperate need to meet from a single message ,I'm a people person I love to interact but I have no preconceptions ,if the people I choose to interact with reply I'm pretty happy with that if it progresses and I get a meet then that's grand that's why I'm here |
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