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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Only if wives or husbands who didn't know found out 
And employers.
And friends and other family...
And enemies... "
Leaves me free and clear...
But others on here...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you all remember what happened with Ashley Madison? Just what if... we'd all be royally effed wouldn't we. "
If you have no secrets,you have no fear of your secrets being revealed. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Do you all remember what happened with Ashley Madison? Just what if... we'd all be royally effed wouldn't we.
If you have no secrets,you have no fear of your secrets being revealed."
I tend to believe that if you have no secrets then you don't really value personal discretion and privacy and have nothing to lose and are probably reckless with other people's secrets too. I care about how my activity affects my livelihood and relationships outside of swinging and fab. This is very much an underground place for me. Fab is definitely not my public life. I'd love to have no secrets and live carefree but there are so many negative consequences. I'd be totally effed if found on this site  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Do you all remember what happened with Ashley Madison? Just what if... we'd all be royally effed wouldn't we.
If you have no secrets,you have no fear of your secrets being revealed.
I tend to believe that if you have no secrets then you don't really value personal discretion and privacy and have nothing to lose and are probably reckless with other people's secrets too. I care about how my activity affects my livelihood and relationships outside of swinging and fab. This is very much an underground place for me. Fab is definitely not my public life. I'd love to have no secrets and live carefree but there are so many negative consequences. I'd be totally effed if found on this site "
I'm not saying you should have to blab your personal life to anybody and everybody and I most certainly can be trusted to keep other peoples confidences but, if you think that by being on this site you are doing something shameful or embarrassing then that is a matter for your conscience.Nobody is forcing you to be on here and,whatever this job of yours is that requires such discretion well,that's your career choice.
You could choose a different job,you could choose not to be on FAB or you could choose to spend your life paranoid that ,one day,your secret will be out. Life is full of choices. Difficulties can arise when you try to have it all your own way. |
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"Do you all remember what happened with Ashley Madison? Just what if... we'd all be royally effed wouldn't we.
If you have no secrets,you have no fear of your secrets being revealed.
I tend to believe that if you have no secrets then you don't really value personal discretion and privacy and have nothing to lose and are probably reckless with other people's secrets too. I care about how my activity affects my livelihood and relationships outside of swinging and fab. This is very much an underground place for me. Fab is definitely not my public life. I'd love to have no secrets and live carefree but there are so many negative consequences. I'd be totally effed if found on this site
I'm not saying you should have to blab your personal life to anybody and everybody and I most certainly can be trusted to keep other peoples confidences but, if you think that by being on this site you are doing something shameful or embarrassing then that is a matter for your conscience.Nobody is forcing you to be on here and,whatever this job of yours is that requires such discretion well,that's your career choice.
You could choose a different job,you could choose not to be on FAB or you could choose to spend your life paranoid that ,one day,your secret will be out. Life is full of choices. Difficulties can arise when you try to have it all your own way."
It’s not always that simple. What about people who maybe have an acrimonious relationship with an ex & have children. It’s not about being ashamed of being on here, it’s about how other people could perceive it & use it against you. It’s about how it affects people around you who have no say in the matter. It’s about how other people, society, the media perceive Swingers & how that would impact on someone’s life or the life of their loved ones.
It would be lovely to have a life that was nice & simple & nothing could be affected by it; or to live in a society that was open minded enough that it didn’t matter. Unfortunately, that is not a luxury a lot of people have  |
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Fab doesn’t collect names and addresses, only DOB. The upgrades are done through a third party, the only thing people have to go off are the pics and the location on your profile and possibly your live location data.
We’re safe 
For now. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Do you all remember what happened with Ashley Madison? Just what if... we'd all be royally effed wouldn't we.
If you have no secrets,you have no fear of your secrets being revealed.
I tend to believe that if you have no secrets then you don't really value personal discretion and privacy and have nothing to lose and are probably reckless with other people's secrets too. I care about how my activity affects my livelihood and relationships outside of swinging and fab. This is very much an underground place for me. Fab is definitely not my public life. I'd love to have no secrets and live carefree but there are so many negative consequences. I'd be totally effed if found on this site
I'm not saying you should have to blab your personal life to anybody and everybody.. "
Exactly, that's my point. I don't have to and I don't want to for reasons that are obvious to people with a life outside and independent of fabswingers.
"and I most certainly can be trusted to keep other peoples confidences but, if you think that by being on this site you are doing something shameful or embarrassing then that is a matter for your conscience."
It's shameful and embarrassing for the public who do not agree with it and WILL make you suffer for it. That has not a damn thing to do with MY conscience but rather my conscious awareness of how the public views swinging. You're really being self righteous about your lack of concern for your reputation offsite. Glad you have that luxury. I don't, and that goes for many of us on here who value discretion and privacy, probably most.
"Nobody is forcing you to be on here and,whatever this job of yours is that requires such discretion well, that's your career choice. "
So only those who are forced to be on here are entitled to give a damn about discretion and their privacy. We must choose the career that matches our sexual appetites so that the two can be merged together into one. I gather that you're ok to play with everyone you work with and I'm glad that's working for you but it won't work for me. You can tell that you've annoyed me with your one-dimensional oversimplifications and reductions.
" You could choose a different job,you could choose not to be on FAB or you could choose to spend your life paranoid that ,one day,your secret will be out. Life is full of choices. Difficulties can arise when you try to have it all your own way."
Thank you, oh wise one for essentialising and packaging my choices for me in such a neat and limited little bow-tied package. I'll just go ahead and change my career now so I can fuck who I want with impunity and lack of any non-sex-related relationships in life. Now that I know I have a choice, I think I'll deal with the difficulty of trying to have it my way when it comes to my privacy and discretion and I'll steer clear of those who have nothing to protect.
I'd much rather protect my complexity with discretion than mould myself into something that I feel comfortable with sharing with everyone indiscriminately.
Your secret is that you don't have a life off of fab. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Fab doesn’t collect names and addresses, only DOB. The upgrades are done through a third party, the only thing people have to go off are the pics and the location on your profile and possibly your live location data.
We’re safe
For now."
Yeah that's true. It would be the third party that has the information though. They'd be the weak link. Yes, I think we're safe but just throwing out a hypothetical scenario. Everyone thought they were safe on AM too. But hopefully we're more secure. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Do you all remember what happened with Ashley Madison? Just what if... we'd all be royally effed wouldn't we.
If you have no secrets,you have no fear of your secrets being revealed.
I tend to believe that if you have no secrets then you don't really value personal discretion and privacy and have nothing to lose and are probably reckless with other people's secrets too. I care about how my activity affects my livelihood and relationships outside of swinging and fab. This is very much an underground place for me. Fab is definitely not my public life. I'd love to have no secrets and live carefree but there are so many negative consequences. I'd be totally effed if found on this site
I'm not saying you should have to blab your personal life to anybody and everybody and I most certainly can be trusted to keep other peoples confidences but, if you think that by being on this site you are doing something shameful or embarrassing then that is a matter for your conscience.Nobody is forcing you to be on here and,whatever this job of yours is that requires such discretion well,that's your career choice.
You could choose a different job,you could choose not to be on FAB or you could choose to spend your life paranoid that ,one day,your secret will be out. Life is full of choices. Difficulties can arise when you try to have it all your own way.
It’s not always that simple. What about people who maybe have an acrimonious relationship with an ex & have children. It’s not about being ashamed of being on here, it’s about how other people could perceive it & use it against you. It’s about how it affects people around you who have no say in the matter. It’s about how other people, society, the media perceive Swingers & how that would impact on someone’s life or the life of their loved ones.
It would be lovely to have a life that was nice & simple & nothing could be affected by it; or to live in a society that was open minded enough that it didn’t matter. Unfortunately, that is not a luxury a lot of people have "
What she said  |
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"Do you all remember what happened with Ashley Madison? Just what if... we'd all be royally effed wouldn't we.
If you have no secrets,you have no fear of your secrets being revealed.
I tend to believe that if you have no secrets then you don't really value personal discretion and privacy and have nothing to lose and are probably reckless with other people's secrets too. I care about how my activity affects my livelihood and relationships outside of swinging and fab. This is very much an underground place for me. Fab is definitely not my public life. I'd love to have no secrets and live carefree but there are so many negative consequences. I'd be totally effed if found on this site
I'm not saying you should have to blab your personal life to anybody and everybody..
Exactly, that's my point. I don't have to and I don't want to for reasons that are obvious to people with a life outside and independent of fabswingers.
and I most certainly can be trusted to keep other peoples confidences but, if you think that by being on this site you are doing something shameful or embarrassing then that is a matter for your conscience.
It's shameful and embarrassing for the public who do not agree with it and WILL make you suffer for it. That has not a damn thing to do with MY conscience but rather my conscious awareness of how the public views swinging. You're really being self righteous about your lack of concern for your reputation offsite. Glad you have that luxury. I don't, and that goes for many of us on here who value discretion and privacy, probably most.
Nobody is forcing you to be on here and,whatever this job of yours is that requires such discretion well, that's your career choice.
So only those who are forced to be on here are entitled to give a damn about discretion and their privacy. We must choose the career that matches our sexual appetites so that the two can be merged together into one. I gather that you're ok to play with everyone you work with and I'm glad that's working for you but it won't work for me. You can tell that you've annoyed me with your one-dimensional oversimplifications and reductions.
You could choose a different job,you could choose not to be on FAB or you could choose to spend your life paranoid that ,one day,your secret will be out. Life is full of choices. Difficulties can arise when you try to have it all your own way.
Thank you, oh wise one for essentialising and packaging my choices for me in such a neat and limited little bow-tied package. I'll just go ahead and change my career now so I can fuck who I want with impunity and lack of any non-sex-related relationships in life. Now that I know I have a choice, I think I'll deal with the difficulty of trying to have it my way when it comes to my privacy and discretion and I'll steer clear of those who have nothing to protect.
I'd much rather protect my complexity with discretion than mould myself into something that I feel comfortable with sharing with everyone indiscriminately.
Your secret is that you don't have a life off of fab. "
Seconded. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Only if wives or husbands who didn't know found out
I’d be fucked if my wife found out. She doesn’t even know about my girlfriend  "
And you don't know about me  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Was she in the Pussycat Dolls? "
That was Ashley Roberts. Ashley Madison is the website for extramarital affairs. Someone hacked the site and published users' names and personally identifying information. Loads of people were just in caught in a massive troll net...........and fuck this, I'm outta here. |
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