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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"One biscuit!? 
I haven't done anything that needs to be confessed so far. The day is yet young.  "
Yup but ones too many. Doh!
Best got your naughty on. Quick!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I also gatecrashed the Leeds CID police Xmas do while pretending to be an on call doctor!(free drinks all night) and I gave medical advice to the inspectors wife!  .
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I also pretended to be blind so I could take my dog with my too a hotel that didn't allow dogs!(he's a Labrador) but a frisky fucker because he ran off across the dining room when somebody dropped some food and I had to then pretend to call across the floor to find him while wearing sunglasses  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"And his name was buck which didn't help shouting that out while trying to catch him "
I think you win the confessions at the moment however the day is young..
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And his name was buck which didn't help shouting that out while trying to catch him
I think you win the confessions at the moment however the day is young..
"
.
I thought I better stop as I was beginning to look bad |
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"And his name was buck which didn't help shouting that out while trying to catch him
I think you win the confessions at the moment however the day is young..
.
I thought I better stop as I was beginning to look bad "
No do carry on it's amusing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And his name was buck which didn't help shouting that out while trying to catch him
I think you win the confessions at the moment however the day is young..
.
I thought I better stop as I was beginning to look bad
No do carry on it's amusing "
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Awwwww your just saying that to make me feel better |
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"So today i eat a biscuit and im suppose to be dieting...
Whats your confessions for the day? "
Nothing, I am an angel, I have fed, mucked out and schooled horses, then done a serious body condition class and only eaten 3/4 an Atkins bar, some home-made soup, and a couple of slices of low fat cheese!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So today i eat a biscuit and im suppose to be dieting...
Whats your confessions for the day? "
I ate my dinner 3 hours early because I was hungry. Loooong time until breakfast now  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm not very proud of this one but...
I once went on a "blind date/social" a few years back with this lady who looked very nice in her pictures but was err "bonkers" and she had this really annoying laugh like a donkey and she laughed at everything all the time .
Anyhow i get this two hour story of everything that's gone wrong in her life, everybody's died, family, friends, pets, the works, depression and recession and work and she's only just begun to recover and she was very nice apart from being bonkers with an annoying laugh and were finishing up in this restaurant and she wants to go up town and I couldn't bring myself to say no but I couldn't stand it any longer either so I decided to climb out the toilet window (I know terrible).
Long story short, smaller toilet window than I thought and bigger drop on other side than I imagined meant I ripped all my pants and fell on my head, staggering up the road while holding my pants up and dabbing my bleeding forehead.... She appeared... Wherve you been, what's happened I've been looking all over for you.. (oooh no, think quick)...I was mugged while having a quick fag, they've taken my wallet and me phone and me house keys, three big fellas I fought two off but the third one bashed me over the head .
Ill be alright, I just need to get home and have a nice cuppa.
To which she gave me a tenner for taxi and to my shame I took it
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"I'm not very proud of this one but...
I once went on a "blind date/social" a few years back with this lady who looked very nice in her pictures but was err "bonkers" and she had this really annoying laugh like a donkey and she laughed at everything all the time .
Anyhow i get this two hour story of everything that's gone wrong in her life, everybody's died, family, friends, pets, the works, depression and recession and work and she's only just begun to recover and she was very nice apart from being bonkers with an annoying laugh and were finishing up in this restaurant and she wants to go up town and I couldn't bring myself to say no but I couldn't stand it any longer either so I decided to climb out the toilet window (I know terrible).
Long story short, smaller toilet window than I thought and bigger drop on other side than I imagined meant I ripped all my pants and fell on my head, staggering up the road while holding my pants up and dabbing my bleeding forehead.... She appeared... Wherve you been, what's happened I've been looking all over for you.. (oooh no, think quick)...I was mugged while having a quick fag, they've taken my wallet and me phone and me house keys, three big fellas I fought two off but the third one bashed me over the head .
Ill be alright, I just need to get home and have a nice cuppa.
To which she gave me a tenner for taxi and to my shame I took it
"
Are you making these up?! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm not very proud of this one but...
I once went on a "blind date/social" a few years back with this lady who looked very nice in her pictures but was err "bonkers" and she had this really annoying laugh like a donkey and she laughed at everything all the time .
Anyhow i get this two hour story of everything that's gone wrong in her life, everybody's died, family, friends, pets, the works, depression and recession and work and she's only just begun to recover and she was very nice apart from being bonkers with an annoying laugh and were finishing up in this restaurant and she wants to go up town and I couldn't bring myself to say no but I couldn't stand it any longer either so I decided to climb out the toilet window (I know terrible).
Long story short, smaller toilet window than I thought and bigger drop on other side than I imagined meant I ripped all my pants and fell on my head, staggering up the road while holding my pants up and dabbing my bleeding forehead.... She appeared... Wherve you been, what's happened I've been looking all over for you.. (oooh no, think quick)...I was mugged while having a quick fag, they've taken my wallet and me phone and me house keys, three big fellas I fought two off but the third one bashed me over the head .
Ill be alright, I just need to get home and have a nice cuppa.
To which she gave me a tenner for taxi and to my shame I took it
Are you making these up?! "
.
The names have been changed to protect the innocent but apart from that sadly there all true |
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"I'm not very proud of this one but...
I once went on a "blind date/social" a few years back with this lady who looked very nice in her pictures but was err "bonkers" and she had this really annoying laugh like a donkey and she laughed at everything all the time .
Anyhow i get this two hour story of everything that's gone wrong in her life, everybody's died, family, friends, pets, the works, depression and recession and work and she's only just begun to recover and she was very nice apart from being bonkers with an annoying laugh and were finishing up in this restaurant and she wants to go up town and I couldn't bring myself to say no but I couldn't stand it any longer either so I decided to climb out the toilet window (I know terrible).
Long story short, smaller toilet window than I thought and bigger drop on other side than I imagined meant I ripped all my pants and fell on my head, staggering up the road while holding my pants up and dabbing my bleeding forehead.... She appeared... Wherve you been, what's happened I've been looking all over for you.. (oooh no, think quick)...I was mugged while having a quick fag, they've taken my wallet and me phone and me house keys, three big fellas I fought two off but the third one bashed me over the head .
Ill be alright, I just need to get home and have a nice cuppa.
To which she gave me a tenner for taxi and to my shame I took it
Are you making these up?! .
The names have been changed to protect the innocent but apart from that sadly there all true "
That is bad! I can't believe you took the tenner,may the Lord strike you down! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm not very proud of this one but...
I once went on a "blind date/social" a few years back with this lady who looked very nice in her pictures but was err "bonkers" and she had this really annoying laugh like a donkey and she laughed at everything all the time .
Anyhow i get this two hour story of everything that's gone wrong in her life, everybody's died, family, friends, pets, the works, depression and recession and work and she's only just begun to recover and she was very nice apart from being bonkers with an annoying laugh and were finishing up in this restaurant and she wants to go up town and I couldn't bring myself to say no but I couldn't stand it any longer either so I decided to climb out the toilet window (I know terrible).
Long story short, smaller toilet window than I thought and bigger drop on other side than I imagined meant I ripped all my pants and fell on my head, staggering up the road while holding my pants up and dabbing my bleeding forehead.... She appeared... Wherve you been, what's happened I've been looking all over for you.. (oooh no, think quick)...I was mugged while having a quick fag, they've taken my wallet and me phone and me house keys, three big fellas I fought two off but the third one bashed me over the head .
Ill be alright, I just need to get home and have a nice cuppa.
To which she gave me a tenner for taxi and to my shame I took it
Are you making these up?! .
The names have been changed to protect the innocent but apart from that sadly there all true
That is bad! I can't believe you took the tenner,may the Lord strike you down!"
.
That's just what the vicar said in confession |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And his name was buck which didn't help shouting that out while trying to catch him
I think you win the confessions at the moment however the day is young..
.
I thought I better stop as I was beginning to look bad "
And making them up! This can double up as my confession, not believing! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"And his name was buck which didn't help shouting that out while trying to catch him
I think you win the confessions at the moment however the day is young..
.
I thought I better stop as I was beginning to look bad
And making them up! This can double up as my confession, not believing! "
.
Ooh ye of little faith  |
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