FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Express Yourself
Express Yourself
Jump to: Newest in thread
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
In this day and age where most of our communicating is done by written text do you find it easier or harder to express yourself?
Do you take advantage of the fact you can take time to respond?
Do you think about the way you write things and do you consider how they could be misinterpreted because of the lack of tone?
Are you wary because text can't always be erased?
What about an emotive subject. Is it easier to be subjective by text or do you prefer to speak face to face? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"In this day and age where most of our communicating is done by written text do you find it easier or harder to express yourself?
Do you take advantage of the fact you can take time to respond?
Do you think about the way you write things and do you consider how they could be misinterpreted because of the lack of tone?
Are you wary because text can't always be erased?
What about an emotive subject. Is it easier to be subjective by text or do you prefer to speak face to face? "
I like to think that I can convey what I am trying to say well with both text and my spoken words. There are times that the space to think for a response can help on here, whereas having to keep on your toes with a verbal reply may lead to more caution, but meaning and intent aren't lost in either medium for me, I feel. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I don’t always come across very well in the written word, mainly because I find it hard to say things without giving away too much of myself.
I like having the time to think of my answer. And I don’t like to think that my response could be misconstrued as being offensive. X |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
I like to think that I can convey what I am trying to say well with both text and my spoken words. There are times that the space to think for a response can help on here, whereas having to keep on your toes with a verbal reply may lead to more caution, but meaning and intent aren't lost in either medium for me, I feel."
It's funny, my thoughts here came from two separate conversations I was having. One about someone who took a dislike to me based on my postings in the forum and how it irked me that they had misinterpreted my manner and personality.
I was also discussing whether a discussion about feelings is better in person and I guess for the same reasons I'd prefer to do it in person. I want to make sure my tone and intent are understood correctly. I also think less time to respond leads to a more genuine reply. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Text and electronic communications has taken over so much human interaction. Hiding behind a screen to live an ever greater part of out lives insulates us from real human contact real emotion real people. How can it not if every interaction is drive through an electronic interface.
I hate tech. ...
It has it's uses but it has no heart no soul no passion no need to hear a voice, see a face, touch another's skin look into their eyes, or feel their warmth.. or even lack warmth....
Give me the real world every time. It's one less barrier for others to hide behind...
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I don’t always come across very well in the written word, mainly because I find it hard to say things without giving away too much of myself.
I like having the time to think of my answer. And I don’t like to think that my response could be misconstrued as being offensive. X "
Do you make an effort not to give too much away? Is that a defence thing or do you just feel outs not appropriate? Why is that?
Yeah a big thing for me is being read wrongly, I guess you can't always control that though if someone has already formed an opinion of you? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
It's funny, my thoughts here came from two separate conversations I was having. One about someone who took a dislike to me based on my postings in the forum and how it irked me that they had misinterpreted my manner and personality.
I was also discussing whether a discussion about feelings is better in person and I guess for the same reasons I'd prefer to do it in person. I want to make sure my tone and intent are understood correctly. I also think less time to respond leads to a more genuine reply. "
All too often folk read something completely different in their heads to how the originator of the text intended. The amount of times that one persons humour bypasses some folk and yet tickles others is just one example.
So yes, I would agree to an extent that face to face gives a mire genuine representation of what someone is trying to convey. But, as ever, there are always exceptions. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I flit between inconsequential one-liners and more considered responses depending on my mood.
Having reviewed some of my forum posts, I can understand why some take a dislike to me. Sometimes I feel like offering supportive comments to posters, offering my view on a subject. This can come across as white knighting. I have been accused of supporting certain ladies as a vain attempt of currying favour or "just to get my dick wet".
How I speak, communicate and generally comment on Fab is not far removed from the real life me. I make no apologies for what I say and how I say it. It is how I am. Some don't like it. Good luck to them. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Text and electronic communications has taken over so much human interaction. Hiding behind a screen to live an ever greater part of out lives insulates us from real human contact real emotion real people. How can it not if every interaction is drive through an electronic interface.
I hate tech. ...
It has it's uses but it has no heart no soul no passion no need to hear a voice, see a face, touch another's skin look into their eyes, or feel their warmth.. or even lack warmth....
Give me the real world every time. It's one less barrier for others to hide behind...
"
I'm sorry, I laughed when I looked up and saw "hiding in the man cave" as your location
But yes I agree. For some people their whole social interactions are taking place online and that's really sad. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I flit between inconsequential one-liners and more considered responses depending on my mood.
Having reviewed some of my forum posts, I can understand why some take a dislike to me. Sometimes I feel like offering supportive comments to posters, offering my view on a subject. This can come across as white knighting. I have been accused of supporting certain ladies as a vain attempt of currying favour or "just to get my dick wet".
How I speak, communicate and generally comment on Fab is not far removed from the real life me. I make no apologies for what I say and how I say it. It is how I am. Some don't like it. Good luck to them."
Awwww, I loves ya |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I like to think I can communicate my thoughts and feelings well enough through the written word. I'm very aware that things can be lost in translation without tone, or physical tells you support what you're saying.
I live by the adage 'know your audience' which helps me alot. It gives me a pause to consider the best way to get myself across in a way that the other person will understand. It can be tricky on an open forum because you can't account for everyone. I also know that you'll never please everyone. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Face to face, my communication style is 'tongue in cheek' and rather dry.
I have to keep reminding myself of this fact when texting and I can be mistaken for being too rude.
Apologies to anyone if I've upset anyone. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I don’t always come across very well in the written word, mainly because I find it hard to say things without giving away too much of myself.
I like having the time to think of my answer. And I don’t like to think that my response could be misconstrued as being offensive. X
Do you make an effort not to give too much away? Is that a defence thing or do you just feel outs not appropriate? Why is that?
Yeah a big thing for me is being read wrongly, I guess you can't always control that though if someone has already formed an opinion of you?"
Yes I do make that effort, it is a defence thing. If people don’t know me and my weakness they can’t hurt me. I’m pretty much the same with my friends and family, I don’t give much away. And some things aren’t appropriate to share on here.
And yes you can’t always control the way some people form opinions of you. Sometimes I hear people’s opinion of me and think they’re totally wrong but that’s their right to think that. X |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"I find that people generally take words the way they want to, that is their issue and not mine.
"
I do find it generally easier to understand and be understood by others when face to face/voice can be heard also. I've found that quite people add what they *think* is being said and just go with that. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I flit between inconsequential one-liners and more considered responses depending on my mood.
Having reviewed some of my forum posts, I can understand why some take a dislike to me. Sometimes I feel like offering supportive comments to posters, offering my view on a subject. This can come across as white knighting. I have been accused of supporting certain ladies as a vain attempt of currying favour or "just to get my dick wet".
How I speak, communicate and generally comment on Fab is not far removed from the real life me. I make no apologies for what I say and how I say it. It is how I am. Some don't like it. Good luck to them."
Would you say you're the same with people in real life though or on a one to one basis online? Do you take the same approach with saying what you think when you think it? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I always care what people think. Sometimes though it doesn't matter what I say, they'll have an opinion and that's fine.
With 'real life' people I check understanding. I fuck up with face to face communication but we sort it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I don’t always come across very well in the written word, mainly because I find it hard to say things without giving away too much of myself.
I like having the time to think of my answer. And I don’t like to think that my response could be misconstrued as being offensive. X
Do you make an effort not to give too much away? Is that a defence thing or do you just feel outs not appropriate? Why is that?
Yeah a big thing for me is being read wrongly, I guess you can't always control that though if someone has already formed an opinion of you?
Yes I do make that effort, it is a defence thing. If people don’t know me and my weakness they can’t hurt me. I’m pretty much the same with my friends and family, I don’t give much away. And some things aren’t appropriate to share on here.
And yes you can’t always control the way some people form opinions of you. Sometimes I hear people’s opinion of me and think they’re totally wrong but that’s their right to think that. X "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I think with a text/forum post, you have time to think about your reply, go over in your head what's best to say & what's best not to say. It's easier to hide/disguise how you really feel sometimes too. Sarcasm can also get confused on here & also in a text. On the phone, in person, it's generally a lot more open with how you feel, what you say etc. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I find that people generally take words the way they want to, that is their issue and not mine.
"
Yeah that's true. Often they want to think of you in certain way so not matter what you say it will be misconstrued. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I like to think I can communicate my thoughts and feelings well enough through the written word. I'm very aware that things can be lost in translation without tone, or physical tells you support what you're saying.
I live by the adage 'know your audience' which helps me alot. It gives me a pause to consider the best way to get myself across in a way that the other person will understand. It can be tricky on an open forum because you can't account for everyone. I also know that you'll never please everyone. "
That's a good way to think about it. Writing in terms they'll understand and I guess taking into account the relationship they have with you and whether they'll "get" you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I prefer face-to-face communication because the words we use are only a fraction of the message we are communicating. That said, when I choose, I can communicate effectively, on multiple levels, with the written word.
On here my words maybe misconstrued, if it is a genuine misunderstanding that I feel I have created through my ambiguity or at fault in some other way I apologise, as I would face-to-face. Otherwise they can think what they like, as it is their agenda not mine and often projection. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Face to face, my communication style is 'tongue in cheek' and rather dry.
I have to keep reminding myself of this fact when texting and I can be mistaken for being too rude.
Apologies to anyone if I've upset anyone."
Yeah. Im the same. I sometimes think what I've written as a cheeky comment might be interpreted as being big headed |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I always care what people think. Sometimes though it doesn't matter what I say, they'll have an opinion and that's fine.
With 'real life' people I check understanding. I fuck up with face to face communication but we sort it. "
Thats a good point too. It's easier to clarify in person I think. If someone can see you are genuine in your attempt to correct things, in text it can come across as aggression. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I find that people generally take words the way they want to, that is their issue and not mine.
Yeah that's true. Often they want to think of you in certain way so not matter what you say it will be misconstrued. "
Exactly. If you know me you know how I mean things. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago
Up on them there hills |
If we are to believe the myth started by Dr. Albert Mehrabian -Professor of Physiology @ UCLA, 55% of communication comes from visual/body language.
38% comes from tone/inflection and only 7% comes from verbal/words.
Face to face would be the best way to communicate.
However, there are a number of flaws in Dr. Mehtabian’s theory. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I think with a text/forum post, you have time to think about your reply, go over in your head what's best to say & what's best not to say. It's easier to hide/disguise how you really feel sometimes too. Sarcasm can also get confused on here & also in a text. On the phone, in person, it's generally a lot more open with how you feel, what you say etc. "
Thats true about hiding things. For example writing "I'm fine" can be read as a basic statement, quite often when it's said in person you can read the undertones and see the expressions and know they're not. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I have a good social life and meet hundreds of people through work, but I can get very nervous and anxious around people in social situations, especially strangers. I can also get very phobic about telephone conversations, though overall I'm a lot better than I used to be.
Long story short I love communicating by text and message and forums etc.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If we are to believe the myth started by Dr. Albert Mehrabian -Professor of Physiology @ UCLA, 55% of communication comes from visual/body language.
38% comes from tone/inflection and only 7% comes from verbal/words.
Face to face would be the best way to communicate.
However, there are a number of flaws in Dr. Mehtabian’s theory."
Can you say a bit more about the flaws in the theory? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I prefer in person or on the phone contact for expressing myself, as i think quite lot of what I say is taken the wrong way. With that said though it rare that I call people these days. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
It's true that face to face can carry a lot of extra information but I think there are a lot of nuances in writing too. For instance "I'm fine", I think it's often quite plain whether they are fine or not, even in text. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago
Up on them there hills |
"If we are to believe the myth started by Dr. Albert Mehrabian -Professor of Physiology @ UCLA, 55% of communication comes from visual/body language.
38% comes from tone/inflection and only 7% comes from verbal/words.
Face to face would be the best way to communicate.
However, there are a number of flaws in Dr. Mehtabian’s theory.
Can you say a bit more about the flaws in the theory?"
Well, if you switched the sound off on the T.v you should be able to understand 93% of communication.
Same with foreign language.
To me, there is something in the theory, I suspect it is like a lot of things, context bound. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If we are to believe the myth started by Dr. Albert Mehrabian -Professor of Physiology @ UCLA, 55% of communication comes from visual/body language.
38% comes from tone/inflection and only 7% comes from verbal/words.
Face to face would be the best way to communicate.
However, there are a number of flaws in Dr. Mehtabian’s theory."
I always find it interesting how often people say that most communication is non verbal. And then how many people say that they aren't very good at picking up on signals. You see it on here alot, where people will say they can never pick up when people are flirting etc.
It does seem to suggest that generally, we're not very good at communicating. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
The whole social media in my opinion has taken away the emotion of the subjects people discuss about.
My ex would rarther txt me her feelings than face to face and I hated that. I need passion and emotion to discuss thoose kind of things. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If we are to believe the myth started by Dr. Albert Mehrabian -Professor of Physiology @ UCLA, 55% of communication comes from visual/body language.
38% comes from tone/inflection and only 7% comes from verbal/words.
Face to face would be the best way to communicate.
However, there are a number of flaws in Dr. Mehtabian’s theory.
I always find it interesting how often people say that most communication is non verbal. And then how many people say that they aren't very good at picking up on signals. You see it on here alot, where people will say they can never pick up when people are flirting etc.
It does seem to suggest that generally, we're not very good at communicating. "
I wouldn’t disagree with that statement at all, but still wondering how that relates to Dr Mehtabian’s theory? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If we are to believe the myth started by Dr. Albert Mehrabian -Professor of Physiology @ UCLA, 55% of communication comes from visual/body language.
38% comes from tone/inflection and only 7% comes from verbal/words.
Face to face would be the best way to communicate.
However, there are a number of flaws in Dr. Mehtabian’s theory.
Can you say a bit more about the flaws in the theory?"
Everyone's different too. Some are very expressive and easily read via body language, eyes and vocal tone etc. Others are very practised or natural at concealing their true thoughts and feelings.
Conversely some are very good at instinctively reading people, others not.
For these reasons 55%, 38%, 7% seem ridiculously specific to me, a very rough average at best. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If we are to believe the myth started by Dr. Albert Mehrabian -Professor of Physiology @ UCLA, 55% of communication comes from visual/body language.
38% comes from tone/inflection and only 7% comes from verbal/words.
Face to face would be the best way to communicate.
However, there are a number of flaws in Dr. Mehtabian’s theory.
I always find it interesting how often people say that most communication is non verbal. And then how many people say that they aren't very good at picking up on signals. You see it on here alot, where people will say they can never pick up when people are flirting etc.
It does seem to suggest that generally, we're not very good at communicating.
I wouldn’t disagree with that statement at all, but still wondering how that relates to Dr Mehtabian’s theory?"
I wasn't directly relating to that theory, as I'm not all that familiar with it, I just tailed on to the point that it often gets stated in some way or another that very little communication is verbal. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I flit between inconsequential one-liners and more considered responses depending on my mood.
Having reviewed some of my forum posts, I can understand why some take a dislike to me. Sometimes I feel like offering supportive comments to posters, offering my view on a subject. This can come across as white knighting. I have been accused of supporting certain ladies as a vain attempt of currying favour or "just to get my dick wet".
How I speak, communicate and generally comment on Fab is not far removed from the real life me. I make no apologies for what I say and how I say it. It is how I am. Some don't like it. Good luck to them.
Would you say you're the same with people in real life though or on a one to one basis online? Do you take the same approach with saying what you think when you think it? "
I believe myself to be relatively consistent between online and real-life persona in terms of my views. I am quite a wordy person and in real life I can tend to descend into a Ronnie Corbett style monologue. In real life I tend to say what I think whenever I feel I can either add value or feel strongly about a particular subject. I also understand the value of silence in a conversation and won't fill a void for the sake of it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Face to face is always best. Even well written text can be misinterpreted depending on the comprehension skills of the reader. I'm not a fan of the phone as I come across as practical and clinical, whereas face to face I'm told I'm far more personable. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Text or face to face, I carefully pay attention to the words people use as I tend to think that it can reveal things about themselves. Now, as everything is down to interpretation and perception, my interpretation of what someone said may be far off what one really meant.
Having said that I do take into consideration the social and cultural context of every social interactions I am having.
But words, written or spoken have a particular meaning so I tend to be careful on subject with sensitive subject.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If we are to believe the myth started by Dr. Albert Mehrabian -Professor of Physiology @ UCLA, 55% of communication comes from visual/body language.
38% comes from tone/inflection and only 7% comes from verbal/words.
Face to face would be the best way to communicate.
However, there are a number of flaws in Dr. Mehtabian’s theory.
I always find it interesting how often people say that most communication is non verbal. And then how many people say that they aren't very good at picking up on signals. You see it on here alot, where people will say they can never pick up when people are flirting etc.
It does seem to suggest that generally, we're not very good at communicating.
I wouldn’t disagree with that statement at all, but still wondering how that relates to Dr Mehtabian’s theory?
I wasn't directly relating to that theory, as I'm not all that familiar with it, I just tailed on to the point that it often gets stated in some way or another that very little communication is verbal. "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago
Up on them there hills |
"Text or face to face, I carefully pay attention to the words people use as I tend to think that it can reveal things about themselves. Now, as everything is down to interpretation and perception, my interpretation of what someone said may be far off what one really meant.
Having said that I do take into consideration the social and cultural context of every social interactions I am having.
But words, written or spoken have a particular meaning so I tend to be careful on subject with sensitive subject.
"
There was a forum post "Misunderstanding a term" that touched on this. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If we are to believe the myth started by Dr. Albert Mehrabian -Professor of Physiology @ UCLA, 55% of communication comes from visual/body language.
38% comes from tone/inflection and only 7% comes from verbal/words.
Face to face would be the best way to communicate.
However, there are a number of flaws in Dr. Mehtabian’s theory.
Can you say a bit more about the flaws in the theory?
Everyone's different too. Some are very expressive and easily read via body language, eyes and vocal tone etc. Others are very practised or natural at concealing their true thoughts and feelings.
Conversely some are very good at instinctively reading people, others not.
For these reasons 55%, 38%, 7% seem ridiculously specific to me, a very rough average at best."
It was a very specific experiment he conducted. I think it is helpful as a guide when discussing effective communication. However I agree with what you say above in terms of individual variation in communication style and efficacy. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"In this day and age where most of our communicating is done by written text do you find it easier or harder to express yourself?
Do you take advantage of the fact you can take time to respond?
Do you think about the way you write things and do you consider how they could be misinterpreted because of the lack of tone?
Are you wary because text can't always be erased?
What about an emotive subject. Is it easier to be subjective by text or do you prefer to speak face to face? " I think you and I kinda had this discussion the other day Rubi . Sometimes words and moreso personality can be misread in the forums . I think if you can be funny when the time is right and serious when the time is right you are half way there . Saying that I do tend to kill threads quite often so what do I know |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"In this day and age where most of our communicating is done by written text do you find it easier or harder to express yourself?
Do you take advantage of the fact you can take time to respond?
Do you think about the way you write things and do you consider how they could be misinterpreted because of the lack of tone?
Are you wary because text can't always be erased?
What about an emotive subject. Is it easier to be subjective by text or do you prefer to speak face to face? I think you and I kinda had this discussion the other day Rubi . Sometimes words and moreso personality can be misread in the forums . I think if you can be funny when the time is right and serious when the time is right you are half way there . Saying that I do tend to kill threads quite often so what do I know "
We did. Your opinion of me was different to how I am in person. But I agree with the conclusion you drew from what you have seen of me here.
(I only replied cos you were in danger of killing another thread ) |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I think it's easier to promote yourself when using words. You can think it through and choose carefully.
I'm not bad talking face to face but I do get nervous.
Phone talk makes me cry. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"In this day and age where most of our communicating is done by written text do you find it easier or harder to express yourself?
Do you take advantage of the fact you can take time to respond?
Do you think about the way you write things and do you consider how they could be misinterpreted because of the lack of tone?
Are you wary because text can't always be erased?
What about an emotive subject. Is it easier to be subjective by text or do you prefer to speak face to face? I think you and I kinda had this discussion the other day Rubi . Sometimes words and moreso personality can be misread in the forums . I think if you can be funny when the time is right and serious when the time is right you are half way there . Saying that I do tend to kill threads quite often so what do I know
We did. Your opinion of me was different to how I am in person. But I agree with the conclusion you drew from what you have seen of me here.
(I only replied cos you were in danger of killing another thread )" Phew!! Now I've replied again I still might . But you're cool anyway Rubi and this place wouldn't be the same without you |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's true that face to face can carry a lot of extra information but I think there are a lot of nuances in writing too. For instance "I'm fine", I think it's often quite plain whether they are fine or not, even in text."
A suggestion ...
Read a txt that comes without emoji that simply says "I'm fine"
Then sit opposite another and watch them say "I'm Fine"... at the same time look at how they act as they speak, say for example...
With a smile that reaches the eyes..
Or
Head tilted down looking away..
Or..
Brushing their hand across their face and hair obscuring their face..
Or
With a tear in the corner of their eye...
Or...
A catch in their voice...
Or...
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
There is a default interpretation that if you're not using smileys you must be angry. Some people need a picture book to get it.
I don't worry about it. I got online in 1993 and had enough flame wars way back. Now I say my piece and rarely return to a thread, so I don't get drawn into ever-decreasing circles of hair-splitting and semantics.
In this way I get the last word and anybody who replies also feels like they get the last word, so everybody's happy. If their reply contains a dumbass contention, then I leave it to others to challenge.
Opinions on the Internet are like spitting into the ocean. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"In this day and age where most of our communicating is done by written text do you find it easier or harder to express yourself?
Do you take advantage of the fact you can take time to respond?
Do you think about the way you write things and do you consider how they could be misinterpreted because of the lack of tone?
Are you wary because text can't always be erased?
What about an emotive subject. Is it easier to be subjective by text or do you prefer to speak face to face? "
If I had to message live in real time I'd be totally fucked!
Being able to take my time n think of what to say n how to say it is a big plus for me.
Emotive subjects are fine because I carefully word my correspondence n double check before sending.....most of the time anyway! Lol |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There is a default interpretation that if you're not using smileys you must be angry. Some people need a picture book to get it.
I don't worry about it. I got online in 1993 and had enough flame wars way back. Now I say my piece and rarely return to a thread, so I don't get drawn into ever-decreasing circles of hair-splitting and semantics.
In this way I get the last word and anybody who replies also feels like they get the last word, so everybody's happy. If their reply contains a dumbass contention, then I leave it to others to challenge.
Opinions on the Internet are like spitting into the ocean."
Love this attitude/ way of looking at it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I like the banter of texting but it's so easy for it to go wrong with misinterpretation. Face to face is better I think as you can read the body language x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's true that face to face can carry a lot of extra information but I think there are a lot of nuances in writing too. For instance "I'm fine", I think it's often quite plain whether they are fine or not, even in text.
A suggestion ...
Read a txt that comes without emoji that simply says "I'm fine"
Then sit opposite another and watch them say "I'm Fine"... at the same time look at how they act as they speak, say for example...
With a smile that reaches the eyes..
Or
Head tilted down looking away..
Or..
Brushing their hand across their face and hair obscuring their face..
Or
With a tear in the corner of their eye...
Or...
A catch in their voice...
Or...
"
That's very poetic.
I only meant that if you're having a text conversation with someone, it's often plain what subtext or emotions etc there are. And conversely for what it's worth, true feelings can be hidden in face to face encounters. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I know I can communicate complicated concepts clearly in laymans terms, I was professionally employed to do so at one time. But I am very aware that the recipients attitudes, perceptions and even projections can wildly alter the interpretation....cue my favourite communications quote:
“I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.”
? Robert McCloskey
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic