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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I haven’t been a huge presence on the forums, but I do pop up occasionally and people may have seen posts where I’ve commented on my lack of confidence.
It’s been an issue for me all of my life, but I came to realise that lately it was seriously impacting on my outlook and my life. With this in mind - and I’m not generally one for New Year’s resolutions - I decided to begin 2018 being kinder to myself. I dusted off a still blank Inner Truth ‘I’m Lovable’ journal I bought a while back, and set to work altering my thought patterns.
I know it’s early days and I know it won’t be a perfect journey upwards, but just a few days in I’m already feeling more confident - and more importantly, happier.
The power of the mind is an amazing thing when we’re not using it to beat ourselves up!
I hope everyone finds a minute today to be kind to themselves!
Mrs F x |
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You've put a smile on my face 
Learning to love and accept yourself is a huge part of happiness xx yes, there will more than likely be hurdles that pop up when you least expect them, but you know what? They'll be gone as quickly as they arrive.
Keep that head high xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What a lovely post. Loving ourselves is so important- the world would be a much happier and loving place to be if we all did.
I found a neat trick with my inner critic. The voice in my head was a bit like a radio but better than that as I have complete control over the sound, tone and volume. If I need to shut it up all I need to remember is to do is mute the volume. If I need a laugh I can change the voice to Donald Duck if I want. And if I need it to nag me to make sure I do something I can turn it onto a parrot on repeat mode until I do it. The mind is like a bus...just make sure you’re the driver and enjoy the ride |
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By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago
Hull |
I am definitely taking a leaf out of your journal! It’s not easy sometimes and helps if you have great people to support you. I’ve never had that til recently so I feel I can allow myself to be a bit kinder to me for a change.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thank you everybody! I’d love to reply individually, but I don’t want to clog the forum up!
Thank you for the kind words and extra advice, and if I’ve made others smile too then that’s awesome
Xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Congratulations on your new positive outlook.
I take time out daily to ‘love’ myself but it’s much more fun with my wife 
Seriously though, it’s a great sentiment to hold, especially this time of year when many people are feeling a bit meh.
Nice thread op and keep spreading the positive vibes
P.s don’t worry about clogging the forum up, its your thread do whatever you like |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Aww what a lovely post. Must admit it’s something I struggle with constantly. I’m going to try and have a positive thought about myself every day and see if that helps xx |
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Confidence is certainly an inner issue, & something that can be easily knocked given how mean & cruel some people can be, normally for their own warped pleasure. My opinion for what it's worth, screw however puts you in a bad place (not literally I might add). If they have a problem with you, it's their issue, not yours.
You don't necessarily need to be kinder to yourself, just accept you are who you are. & it's for other people to follow suit. If they don't or can't, you don't have to change to make them happy. You only have to change (if you feel it's necessary) to make you happy.
Keep smiling, big cyber hugs if needed #feelthelove |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Congratulations on your new positive outlook.
I take time out daily to ‘love’ myself but it’s much more fun with my wife
Seriously though, it’s a great sentiment to hold, especially this time of year when many people are feeling a bit meh.
Nice thread op and keep spreading the positive vibes
P.s don’t worry about clogging the forum up, its your thread do whatever you like"
If that encouraging response was so you could get your own reply, it worked 
And thank you! I love your profile pic btw, have admired it in the past, very nicely done  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Aww what a lovely post. Must admit it’s something I struggle with constantly. I’m going to try and have a positive thought about myself every day and see if that helps xx"
Why stop at one?! You’re looking great x
I use those cheesy quotes to help too, love all that!
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Confidence is certainly an inner issue, & something that can be easily knocked given how mean & cruel some people can be, normally for their own warped pleasure. My opinion for what it's worth, screw however puts you in a bad place (not literally I might add). If they have a problem with you, it's their issue, not yours.
You don't necessarily need to be kinder to yourself, just accept you are who you are. & it's for other people to follow suit. If they don't or can't, you don't have to change to make them happy. You only have to change (if you feel it's necessary) to make you happy.
Keep smiling, big cyber hugs if needed #feelthelove"
Thank you! And I do need to be kinder to myself, you haven’t heard the criticism I used to hand out to myself
I appreciate the encouragement x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Lovely post.. and you be inspired me to start writing my own journal of all the good things that have happened each day rather than the negatives..
I wish you well on your journey...x"
Yay! Hope it works for you too! Xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hurrah! Your post is serendipitous. I am also making a new effort to make continuous conscious choices in how I view and live things, so as not to fall foul to my doubts and critics. It makes a huge difference, and is incredibly liberating. I was calling 2018 my year of yes.
More power and love to you, OP. And also phwoaaaar, I fancy you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I firmly believe that love starts within. I frequently get shit for admitting my complete and utter love for myself but if the alternative is self loathing then I don’t want to change.
You are wonderful just the way you are! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hurrah! Your post is serendipitous. I am also making a new effort to make continuous conscious choices in how I view and live things, so as not to fall foul to my doubts and critics. It makes a huge difference, and is incredibly liberating. I was calling 2018 my year of yes.
More power and love to you, OP. And also phwoaaaar, I fancy you. "
Hahaha! Why thank you! That’s quite a confidence boost in itself 
Good luck with your own changes x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Good for you op...confidence is important and can be fragile, fab does definitely help to grow confidence x"
If used in the right way it does, it actually damaged it for me for a while when I got into the habit of comparing myself (unfavourably) to others. No more though! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I firmly believe that love starts within. I frequently get shit for admitting my complete and utter love for myself but if the alternative is self loathing then I don’t want to change.
You are wonderful just the way you are! "
Ah, good for you! Not sure I’ll ever reach those dizzy heights, but as long as I can remain happier I’m good with it xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Good for you op...confidence is important and can be fragile, fab does definitely help to grow confidence x
If used in the right way it does, it actually damaged it for me for a while when I got into the habit of comparing myself (unfavourably) to others. No more though! "
Be you, there's no-one better qualified. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Confidence is certainly an inner issue, & something that can be easily knocked given how mean & cruel some people can be, normally for their own warped pleasure. My opinion for what it's worth, screw however puts you in a bad place (not literally I might add). If they have a problem with you, it's their issue, not yours.
You don't necessarily need to be kinder to yourself, just accept you are who you are. & it's for other people to follow suit. If they don't or can't, you don't have to change to make them happy. You only have to change (if you feel it's necessary) to make you happy.
Keep smiling, big cyber hugs if needed #feelthelove"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Aww what a lovely post. Must admit it’s something I struggle with constantly. I’m going to try and have a positive thought about myself every day and see if that helps xx
Why stop at one?! You’re looking great x
I use those cheesy quotes to help too, love all that!
"
Thank you, I will struggle to believe one a day so start small. Yes those cheesy quotes are great x |
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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago
C'est moi Boudoir |
Beautiful post op...very fitting as so are you
We as human beings tend to focus on the negatives daily when there are way more positives if we just care to acknowledge them. It's funny how we can let a small incident impact on our day/mood negatively. Tell that stranger her shoes are lovely, say thank you to the cashier and wish them a lovely day, tell that father that he is doing a great job and the tell yourself you are a beautiful worthy human being but more importantly... believe it.
Happy new year fabbers you wonderful bunch of eclectic people that make me smile daily.
Madame B X |
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