I'm in the wide awake club. Not for the usual reasons though. Some scumbag has been knocking on doors to 'test' responses to decide which ones to rob. Luckily, I'm a light sleeper.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can I join the club

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By *itofamouthfullMan over a year ago

cotswolds/herefordshire

"Sleep tomorrow...about 30 minutes before your alarm. Or is it just me? "

I did that yesterday morning then went back to sleep after the alarm and was late for work! So I’ll be skipping sleep tonight so I’m not late today

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Up...and drinking wine with a friend

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

"Up...and drinking wine with a friend

Im drinking wine....... alone lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Up...and drinking wine with a friend

All my wine is gone. As are the giant buttons. Woe is me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Up...and drinking wine with a friend

All my wine is gone. As are the giant buttons. Woe is me"

I like to share

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Up...and drinking wine with a friend

Im drinking wine....... alone lol "

And you're only a few miles away! Tragedy!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Up...and drinking wine with a friend

All my wine is gone. As are the giant buttons. Woe is me

I like to share

I'd normally ask if it's nice wine, but I really dont care right now. Fancy a spoon and an awkward erection?

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

"Up...and drinking wine with a friend

Im drinking wine....... alone lol

And you're only a few miles away! Tragedy!"

Indeed lol i need more wine lol etc etc

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Up...and drinking wine with a friend

All my wine is gone. As are the giant buttons. Woe is me

I like to share

I'd normally ask if it's nice wine, but I really dont care right now. Fancy a spoon and an awkward erection? "

You really need to ask?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sleep tomorrow...about 30 minutes before your alarm. Or is it just me? "
I'm guilty

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm due up in 5 hours and don't feel at all sleepy fgs

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Up...and drinking wine with a friend

All my wine is gone. As are the giant buttons. Woe is me

I like to share

I'd normally ask if it's nice wine, but I really dont care right now. Fancy a spoon and an awkward erection?

You really need to ask?

Ping

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Up...and drinking wine with a friend

All my wine is gone. As are the giant buttons. Woe is me

I like to share

I'd normally ask if it's nice wine, but I really dont care right now. Fancy a spoon and an awkward erection?

You really need to ask?

Ping

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

Think i might order more booze lol .....

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By *elloIntrigueMan over a year ago

North West UK

"I'm due up in 5 hours and don't feel at all sleepy fgs

Chat to me for a bit minxy - that will send you to sleep....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

I've only got one so I'd finished

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

I'm busy wishing you were here

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

I've only got one so I'd finished"

Damn. I shouldve counted boobs

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

You've got to ask nicely if you want to see mine. Sorry

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

I'm busy wishing you were here

Me too

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By *roticaCouple over a year ago

Gloucestershire

just an idea. Why dont you all cam and have a mass cum session so you will be so tired you can all sleep. I would love that but my partner is here

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

You've got to ask nicely if you want to see mine. Sorry "

Can i please touch....i mean see...your penis?

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

Party at mine anyone ?? lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Guilty up all hours but brain not shut up x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Party at mine anyone ?? lol "

Jamie! Im in scotland

Now show me your penis please. I need to count it. Again

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

You've got to ask nicely if you want to see mine. Sorry

Can i please touch....i mean see...your penis? "

Well, it'll not stretch to Edinburgh but its not far away. Let's see what happens

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

"Party at mine anyone ?? lol

Jamie! Im in scotland

Now show me your penis please. I need to count it. Again

count it ?? lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sleep tomorrow...about 30 minutes before your alarm. Or is it just me? "

Not just you lovely. Night time is my day time

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Don't count sheep, count cocks

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By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

And I am done lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Paid up member of wide awake club here she’s snoring like a train ( not sure that makes sense )

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sleep tomorrow...about 30 minutes before your alarm. Or is it just me?

Not just you lovely. Night time is my day time "

But on the plus side, you get to hijack threads and nobody gives a shit, because most of them are sleeping

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

You've got to ask nicely if you want to see mine. Sorry

Can i please touch....i mean see...your penis?

Well, it'll not stretch to Edinburgh but its not far away. Let's see what happens

I'll stop off on my way back south

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Don't count sheep, count cocks

I know a huge amount of complete cocks, do they count?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Party at mine anyone ?? lol

Jamie! Im in scotland

Now show me your penis please. I need to count it. Again

count it ?? lol

Dont make me wait again!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Don't count sheep, count cocks

That should be the fab slogan

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Don't count sheep, count cocks

I know a huge amount of complete cocks, do they count?

If it helps you to sleep

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

And I am done lol"

Poor effort!

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

Uh ohh vodka on the way lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Don't count sheep, count cocks

That should be the fab slogan "
yer still not seeing mine

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

You've got to ask nicely if you want to see mine. Sorry

Can i please touch....i mean see...your penis?

Well, it'll not stretch to Edinburgh but its not far away. Let's see what happens

I'll stop off on my way back south "

Promise? I'll get the wine, sleeping tablets and awkward errection on standby

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Don't count sheep, count cocks

That should be the fab slogan yer still not seeing mine

Like....ever?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

You've got to ask nicely if you want to see mine. Sorry

Can i please touch....i mean see...your penis?

Well, it'll not stretch to Edinburgh but its not far away. Let's see what happens

I'll stop off on my way back south

Promise? I'll get the wine, sleeping tablets and awkward errection on standby"

Damn you know all the right things to say

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Don't count sheep, count cocks

That should be the fab slogan yer still not seeing mine

Like....ever?

Nobody needs to see such a sight.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Don't count sheep, count cocks

I know a huge amount of complete cocks, do they count?

If it helps you to sleep

Probably wouldn't since they're complete knob heads!!! And not in a sexy way sadly...

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By *elloIntrigueMan over a year ago

North West UK

Anyone got a lump hammer?

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

"Don't count sheep, count cocks

I know a huge amount of complete cocks, do they count?

If it helps you to sleep

Probably wouldn't since they're complete knob heads!!! And not in a sexy way sadly...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

You've got to ask nicely if you want to see mine. Sorry

Can i please touch....i mean see...your penis?

Well, it'll not stretch to Edinburgh but its not far away. Let's see what happens

I'll stop off on my way back south

Promise? I'll get the wine, sleeping tablets and awkward errection on standby

Damn you know all the right things to say

It's a gift, what can I say?

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

im playing insomnia by faithless

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Don't count sheep, count cocks

That should be the fab slogan yer still not seeing mine

Like....ever?

Nobody needs to see such a sight. "

How about just a little peek? Like a quick flash then we say no more.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm in but not counting penises not my thing

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"im playing insomnia by faithless

Tune.

And now it's stuck in my head

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

"im playing insomnia by faithless

Tune.

And now it's stuck in my head"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

You've got to ask nicely if you want to see mine. Sorry

Can i please touch....i mean see...your penis?

Well, it'll not stretch to Edinburgh but its not far away. Let's see what happens

I'll stop off on my way back south

Promise? I'll get the wine, sleeping tablets and awkward errection on standby

Damn you know all the right things to say

It's a gift, what can I say? "

Awkward erections are the best kind. Im not into those proud show off type ones. Dicks!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

You've got to ask nicely if you want to see mine. Sorry

Can i please touch....i mean see...your penis?

Well, it'll not stretch to Edinburgh but its not far away. Let's see what happens

I'll stop off on my way back south

Promise? I'll get the wine, sleeping tablets and awkward errection on standby

Damn you know all the right things to say

It's a gift, what can I say?

Awkward erections are the best kind. Im not into those proud show off type ones. Dicks! "

Bloody show offs with their proud erections! If it's not awkwardly nudging a little spoon in the back is it even there!?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm in but not counting penises not my thing "

Penises or counting?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Fulltime insomniac over here, hi

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

You've got to ask nicely if you want to see mine. Sorry

Can i please touch....i mean see...your penis?

Well, it'll not stretch to Edinburgh but its not far away. Let's see what happens

I'll stop off on my way back south

Promise? I'll get the wine, sleeping tablets and awkward errection on standby

Damn you know all the right things to say

It's a gift, what can I say?

Awkward erections are the best kind. Im not into those proud show off type ones. Dicks!

Bloody show offs with their proud erections! If it's not awkwardly nudging a little spoon in the back is it even there!? "

Exactly. If i cant hear that uuggghh noise as i pretend to stretch in my sleep and the awkward paranoia hits then im not impressed.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Wide awake too. Some good looking insomniacs on here.

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

should i stay or should i go lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm in but not counting penises not my thing

Penises or counting?"

Willy! Penis number 8529. Check

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm in but not counting penises not my thing

Penises or counting?

Willy! Penis number 8529. Check

Cockaholic

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

"I'm in but not counting penises not my thing

Penises or counting?

Willy! Penis number 8529. Check

Cockaholic

she is lol

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By *ieman300Man over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

"Guys? I was counting the penises! No one joined in

And I am done lol

Poor effort! "

I'll do an election style recount.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm in but not counting penises not my thing

Penises or counting?

Willy! Penis number 8529. Check

Cockaholic

she is lol

Im a fab quality control officer. I have to inspect the penii (that's totally the plural of penis right?) for flaws.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm in but not counting penises not my thing

Penises or counting?

Willy! Penis number 8529. Check

8529 here!

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

"I'm in but not counting penises not my thing

Penises or counting?

Willy! Penis number 8529. Check

Cockaholic

she is lol

Im a fab quality control officer. I have to inspect the penii (that's totally the plural of penis right?) for flaws. "

well thats me phukt then lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm in but not counting penises not my thing

Penises or counting?

Willy! Penis number 8529. Check

Cockaholic

she is lol

Im a fab quality control officer. I have to inspect the penii (that's totally the plural of penis right?) for flaws. "

How do we know if we've made the grade?

Is there a 'Rubidoux seal of approval' mark you could apply?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm in but not counting penises not my thing

Penises or counting?

Willy! Penis number 8529. Check

8529 here!"

Report for duty

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm in but not counting penises not my thing

Penises or counting?

Willy! Penis number 8529. Check

Cockaholic

she is lol

Im a fab quality control officer. I have to inspect the penii (that's totally the plural of penis right?) for flaws.

well thats me phukt then lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm in but not counting penises not my thing

Penises or counting?

Willy! Penis number 8529. Check

Cockaholic

she is lol

Im a fab quality control officer. I have to inspect the penii (that's totally the plural of penis right?) for flaws.

How do we know if we've made the grade?

Is there a 'Rubidoux seal of approval' mark you could apply?

Its red and lip shaped

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Eating cold pizza in bed at this time is normal yeah?

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

"I'm in but not counting penises not my thing

Penises or counting?

Willy! Penis number 8529. Check

Cockaholic

she is lol

Im a fab quality control officer. I have to inspect the penii (that's totally the plural of penis right?) for flaws.

How do we know if we've made the grade?

Is there a 'Rubidoux seal of approval' mark you could apply?

Its red and lip shaped

oooosssh

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Eating cold pizza in bed at this time is normal yeah?"

Yes! I got a tiger roll and cup of tea. It was too cold not to get back in the bed.

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

Its a kind of magic

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By *oubyLoverWoman over a year ago

East Yorkshire

The thread was started 2 hours ago...bit early for insomniacs

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The thread was started 2 hours ago...bit early for insomniacs

We're still going though

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Eating cold pizza in bed at this time is normal yeah?

Yes! I got a tiger roll and cup of tea. It was too cold not to get back in the bed. "

Mmmm tiger bread! Lurpak? And I don't mean that spreadable shite!

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

"The thread was started 2 hours ago...bit early for insomniacs

I thought i would get in early lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm in but not counting penises not my thing

Penises or counting?

Willy! Penis number 8529. Check

8529 here!

Report for duty

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Wide awake here... Please can I have a spoon, an awkward erection and some cocks to count

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

"Wide awake here... Please can I have a spoon, an awkward erection and some cocks to count

desert or table spoon ? and if my erection is awkard cant give cocks to count though lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Wide awake here... Please can I have a spoon, an awkward erection and some cocks to count

desert or table spoon ? and if my erection is awkard cant give cocks to count though lol "

Which ever is a big spoon

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

"Wide awake here... Please can I have a spoon, an awkward erection and some cocks to count

desert or table spoon ? and if my erection is awkard cant give cocks to count though lol

Which ever is a big spoon "

desert i think lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Eating cold pizza in bed at this time is normal yeah?

Yes! I got a tiger roll and cup of tea. It was too cold not to get back in the bed.

Mmmm tiger bread! Lurpak? And I don't mean that spreadable shite! "

Proper lurpak! Kept in a butter dish on the worktop overnight so you can use it on toast in the morning!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Wide awake here... Please can I have a spoon, an awkward erection and some cocks to count

desert or table spoon ? and if my erection is awkard cant give cocks to count though lol

Which ever is a big spoon

desert i think lol

Ud be dessert spoon I'll be teaspoon

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

omg stairway to heaven - led zep ooossshhh x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Morning all. Wide awake and full of lurgy here, im going to count snotty tissues.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I used to be one but it was because of uni, 2 years later I've recovered

I can't remember uni. You mustn't have done it right

I probably haven't, I'm a bit of an odd ball

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By *oubyLoverWoman over a year ago

East Yorkshire

"Eating cold pizza in bed at this time is normal yeah?

Yes! I got a tiger roll and cup of tea. It was too cold not to get back in the bed.

Mmmm tiger bread! Lurpak? And I don't mean that spreadable shite!

Proper lurpak! Kept in a butter dish on the worktop overnight so you can use it on toast in the morning! "

I had a crisp sandwich with loads of proper butter on nice soft white bread. Yummy

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

"Eating cold pizza in bed at this time is normal yeah?

Yes! I got a tiger roll and cup of tea. It was too cold not to get back in the bed.

Mmmm tiger bread! Lurpak? And I don't mean that spreadable shite!

Proper lurpak! Kept in a butter dish on the worktop overnight so you can use it on toast in the morning!

I had a crisp sandwich with loads of proper butter on nice soft white bread. Yummy"

What flavour crisps ?? x

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By *ccasionalfunCouple over a year ago

hereandthere

I'm awake but want to be in bed. At work till 6am

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By *issBehavingxxWoman over a year ago

Glasgow

Awake due to the workies who arrived in my street at 1.00am... and who are now playing with a pneumatic drill

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

"Awake due to the workies who arrived in my street at 1.00am... and who are now playing with a pneumatic drill

kill them lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What shall we count? "
your money !!

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By *issBehavingxxWoman over a year ago

Glasgow

"Awake due to the workies who arrived in my street at 1.00am... and who are now playing with a pneumatic drill

kill them lol

Very tempting... But there's about 8 of them. I fear I wouldn't win

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

"Awake due to the workies who arrived in my street at 1.00am... and who are now playing with a pneumatic drill

kill them lol

Very tempting... But there's about 8 of them. I fear I wouldn't win

glock 9mm wins every time

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By *issBehavingxxWoman over a year ago

Glasgow

"Awake due to the workies who arrived in my street at 1.00am... and who are now playing with a pneumatic drill

kill them lol

Very tempting... But there's about 8 of them. I fear I wouldn't win

glock 9mm wins every time

Yeah... that got confiscated when I threatened the last lot of Jehovahs Witnesses that knocked on my door

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By *amiePhuktMan over a year ago

Bristol

"Awake due to the workies who arrived in my street at 1.00am... and who are now playing with a pneumatic drill

kill them lol

Very tempting... But there's about 8 of them. I fear I wouldn't win

glock 9mm wins every time

Yeah... that got confiscated when I threatened the last lot of Jehovahs Witnesses that knocked on my door

Well you should of had a back up then ?? standard practice really lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Insomniac sounds about right think il fit in here il be here till gone 6 as long as others are still awake ^^

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Insomniac sounds about right think il fit in here il be here till gone 6 as long as others are still awake ^^"

Very apt username then

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By *oubyLoverWoman over a year ago

East Yorkshire

"Eating cold pizza in bed at this time is normal yeah?

Yes! I got a tiger roll and cup of tea. It was too cold not to get back in the bed.

Mmmm tiger bread! Lurpak? And I don't mean that spreadable shite!

Proper lurpak! Kept in a butter dish on the worktop overnight so you can use it on toast in the morning!

I had a crisp sandwich with loads of proper butter on nice soft white bread. Yummy

What flavour crisps ?? x"

Cheese and onion, nothing else works for me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 21/12/17 03:31:54]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Darkeyed panda cub

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By *isaB45Woman over a year ago

Fabville

Not well, brain awake.

And, of course, a full-on day at work tomorow (today)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Knackered but can’t sleep. In work x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm in but not counting penises not my thing

Penises or counting?"

Both lol started reading insomnia by steven king

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yay.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It's been a dull night tonight

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Eating cold pizza in bed at this time is normal yeah?

Yes! I got a tiger roll and cup of tea. It was too cold not to get back in the bed.

Mmmm tiger bread! Lurpak? And I don't mean that spreadable shite!

Proper lurpak! Kept in a butter dish on the worktop overnight so you can use it on toast in the morning! "

Absolute filth!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Slept like a log

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Ridiculously tired and cranky now.

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