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Patchy tits and don't mention the arse and tits

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By *aucy tigger OP   Woman  over a year ago

Back where I belong

I have a friend who has tried out a fake tan for another friend. All good, except after a few days she is now looking rather patchy. Not good with the holiday season fast approaching and she's planning on spending Wednesday at a naturist spa .

Have any of you got any ideas on how she can remove the patchy tan without rubbing herself raw?

I'm asking on behalf of a fellow formurite - all offers of help will be carefully vetted.

PS see PA I didn't mention you by name!

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

Oh FFS!

I'm fucking glad you're my friend & not my enemy...

Love ya xxx

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By *gnitemybodyWoman  over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor


"Oh FFS!

I'm fucking glad you're my friend & not my enemy...

Love ya xxx"

Looking a bit patchy are you!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Lol!

You 2 are cracking me up!

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By *aucy tigger OP   Woman  over a year ago

Back where I belong


"Oh FFS!

I'm fucking glad you're my friend & not my enemy...

Love ya xxx"

Shush. I didn't mention any names

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Lemon juice and sugar works.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Exfoliate tits with sperm

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Onsies are in this time of year

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By *orny IrishMan  over a year ago

Rural Wiltshire


"Oh FFS!

I'm fucking glad you're my friend & not my enemy...

Love ya xxx"

I would be happy to reapply more tanning solution to all of you body to ensure I get every part.

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"Oh FFS!

I'm fucking glad you're my friend & not my enemy...

Love ya xxx

Shush. I didn't mention any names "

Twat!

I have a friend who runs a tanning salon, last week I 'Guinea pigged' a new product for him.

Supposed to last 14 days & fade off naturally..

Today I look like I've got vitiligo FML!

He won't be stocking the product now!

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By *orny IrishMan  over a year ago

Rural Wiltshire


"Exfoliate tits with sperm "

Honey Rose is that why yours look so amazing and cause a serious stiffening in the trouser region?

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By *ringles0510Woman  over a year ago

Central Borders


"Oh FFS!

I'm fucking glad you're my friend & not my enemy...

Love ya xxx"

Would a sunshower or 2 maybe help even things out? x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Lemon juice and sugar works.

"

Mmmmmmmm pancakes

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By *he Devils Daughter!Woman  over a year ago

some where in yorkshire

Milk works for removing hair dye so u cud try that

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By *aucy tigger OP   Woman  over a year ago

Back where I belong


"Oh FFS!

I'm fucking glad you're my friend & not my enemy...

Love ya xxx

Shush. I didn't mention any names

Twat!

I have a friend who runs a tanning salon, last week I 'Guinea pigged' a new product for him.

Supposed to last 14 days & fade off naturally..

Today I look like I've got vitiligo FML!

He won't be stocking the product now! "

Secrets out now and it wasn't me pmsl xxx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Exfoliate tits with sperm

Honey Rose is that why yours look so amazing and cause a serious stiffening in the trouser region? "

Very good skin tonic

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"

Secrets out now and it wasn't me pmsl xxx"

You should know by now, I have no shame lol xxx

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By *aucy tigger OP   Woman  over a year ago

Back where I belong


"

Secrets out now and it wasn't me pmsl xxx

You should know by now, I have no shame lol xxx"

That makes two of us.... God help the clubs when we're there together

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Oh FFS!

I'm fucking glad you're my friend & not my enemy...

Love ya xxx"

A friend had this same issue a while back, putting 'fake' tan on top will only hi light the differece more so don't try.

Use toothpaste and rub over effected area, if its mint or menthol it'll make ur nipples stand to attention but that soon calms down with a good fingering. Once 'fake' tan has been rub off reapply.

Hope that helps. If you were nearer id demonstrate it for free and help you out. Sadly its not to be

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I used to just use exfoliating gloves and a normal shower gel. Works a treat

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Lemon juice and sugar works.

"

If the sugar isn't fully dissolved it can cause minute scratches as you rub it and the lemon juice will sting like fuck!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Oh FFS!

I'm fucking glad you're my friend & not my enemy...

Love ya xxx

Shush. I didn't mention any names

Twat!

I have a friend who runs a tanning salon, last week I 'Guinea pigged' a new product for him.

Supposed to last 14 days & fade off naturally..

Today I look like I've got vitiligo FML!

He won't be stocking the product now! "

I also do the guinea pig thing for a friend, she tells me she needs to test the tans on a man's skin as it's different to women's. I think she just enjoys the pendulum motion when it comes to spraying my cock.

I've found chlorine seems to take tan off, if I go for a swim or in a hot tub it soon disappears.

Another option is add more tan to even it out.

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By *orny IrishMan  over a year ago

Rural Wiltshire


"Exfoliate tits with sperm

Honey Rose is that why yours look so amazing and cause a serious stiffening in the trouser region?

Very good skin tonic "

Let me know when you need to apply more I am happy to assist.

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

Thanks folks for all the tips.

I'm going swimming later, will have a steam & sauna too, hopefully that may shift most of it.

If you spot a patchy bird at Kestrels tomorrow, you know it failed

XxxX

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By *orny IrishMan  over a year ago

Rural Wiltshire


"Thanks folks for all the tips.

I'm going swimming later, will have a steam & sauna too, hopefully that may shift most of it.

If you spot a patchy bird at Kestrels tomorrow, you know it failed

XxxX"

I wish I was free tomorrow.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Oh FFS!

I'm fucking glad you're my friend & not my enemy...

Love ya xxx

Shush. I didn't mention any names

Twat!

I have a friend who runs a tanning salon, last week I 'Guinea pigged' a new product for him.

Supposed to last 14 days & fade off naturally..

Today I look like I've got vitiligo FML!

He won't be stocking the product now! "

Is he still on your Christmas card list?

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By *dam1971Man  over a year ago

Bedford


" see PA I didn't mention you by name!

"

Thank goodness, we don’t want to embarrass anyone

How about claiming you’re in fancy dress as an Oompah Loompah with eczema?

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"Oh FFS!

I'm fucking glad you're my friend & not my enemy...

Love ya xxx

Shush. I didn't mention any names

Twat!

I have a friend who runs a tanning salon, last week I 'Guinea pigged' a new product for him.

Supposed to last 14 days & fade off naturally..

Today I look like I've got vitiligo FML!

He won't be stocking the product now!

Is he still on your Christmas card list?"

Oh yes, every girl needs a gay best friend, even if they're an absolute twat x

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By *olgateMan  over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

You could rub vick on it

Should I mention it to him?

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By *ex LutherMan  over a year ago

Closer than you think

Well having met the OP and the patchy titted one neither should have an issue really being a pair of scrubbers x

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"Well having met the OP and the patchy titted one neither should have an issue really being a pair of scrubbers x"

Oi watch it, or I'll use your stubble as an exfoliator

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By *aucy tigger OP   Woman  over a year ago

Back where I belong

[Removed by poster at 19/12/17 11:14:24]

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By *aucy tigger OP   Woman  over a year ago

Back where I belong


"Well having met the OP and the patchy titted one neither should have an issue really being a pair of scrubbers x"

Bloody cheek, I won't take my teeth out next time I give you a blow job

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"Well having met the OP and the patchy titted one neither should have an issue really being a pair of scrubbers x

Bloody cheek, I won't take my teeth out next time I give you a blow job "

Make him suffer Tigger xx

Well, swim, sauna & steam done, I'm even more patchy, and have acquired 3 huge spots on my face.

WTF! I never had spots as a teenager so why now!

I'm off shopping, for salt, lemon juice, toothpaste & bleach

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Go to Essex and get another spray tan to cover it up. Dark mahogany should do it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Perhaps just keep your dressing gown on at kestrels tomorrow?!

Although to be fair I've seen a LOT worse than dodgy fake tan at kestrels over the years

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

Right, third scrub of the day

Can't tell if it's all gone, my skins still bright red!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Oh FFS!

I'm fucking glad you're my friend & not my enemy...

Love ya xxx

A friend had this same issue a while back, putting 'fake' tan on top will only hi light the differece more so don't try.

Use toothpaste and rub over effected area, if its mint or menthol it'll make ur nipples stand to attention but that soon calms down with a good fingering. Once 'fake' tan has been rub off reapply.

Hope that helps. If you were nearer id demonstrate it for free and help you out. Sadly its not to be "

Not sure if this is more a cure or a fantasy

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman  over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"Oh FFS!

I'm fucking glad you're my friend & not my enemy...

Love ya xxx

A friend had this same issue a while back, putting 'fake' tan on top will only hi light the differece more so don't try.

Use toothpaste and rub over effected area, if its mint or menthol it'll make ur nipples stand to attention but that soon calms down with a good fingering. Once 'fake' tan has been rub off reapply.

Hope that helps. If you were nearer id demonstrate it for free and help you out. Sadly its not to be

Not sure if this is more a cure or a fantasy "

I figured I'd need at least 5 tubes to do my whole body, so can't say if it's a cure or not lol x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have a friend who has tried out a fake tan for another friend. All good, except after a few days she is now looking rather patchy. Not good with the holiday season fast approaching and she's planning on spending Wednesday at a naturist spa .

Have any of you got any ideas on how she can remove the patchy tan without rubbing herself raw?

I'm asking on behalf of a fellow formurite - all offers of help will be carefully vetted.

PS see PA I didn't mention you by name!

"

Peach x

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By *dam1971Man  over a year ago

Bedford

I just want to say that I’m here to support you in this difficult time. The best way to do that is to take some pictures of your naked body with cream squirted over it and send them to me.

Happy to help

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