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Heart Attack 'News'
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Headlines this morning ......
A new wonder diet to stop heart attacks.....
Sneakily I read the opening paragraphs to see if I wanted to buy the paper.
Here is it folks ..... Your much needed 'NEWS'
Exercise more, Eat Less, Eat more fruit and Veg cut right back on booze, fat a and sugar????
What UN'News' Item have you read lately? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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And in a bold move ,,,, Drastic new measures, may now be required to replace the previous drastic measures which were boldly brought in to solve the crisis......   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And in a bold move ,,,, Drastic new measures, may now be required to replace the previous drastic measures which were boldly brought in to solve the crisis...... "
........ leaves on the tracks again? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
........ leaves on the tracks again? "
That’s a tricky one though…. The rail companies have a crack team looking into it….
But so far, all they’ve come up with is two ideas,,,,
Either drive over the top of the leaves and squash them … or alternatively they propose sending a specially adapted train with a big brush attached to the front, to sweep the lines clean before other trains uses it….
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Victoria Beckham was seen out shopping with her baby!!!!
OMG that woman must be so amazing!!!!
I mean fancy that,,,,,,,, she actually went out shopping with her baby!!!!..... how does she manage it!!!
Its just utterly incredible… |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The wholesale price of oil and gas has risen, so domestic Fuel bills are expected to increase,,,,,
while in other news,,,,
Annalists forecast there should be a fall in the wholesale price of oil an gas before the end of the year, so we can expect higher domestic fuel bill as a result of that too …. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Headlines this morning ......
A new wonder diet to stop heart attacks.....
Sneakily I read the opening paragraphs to see if I wanted to buy the paper.
Here is it folks ..... Your much needed 'NEWS'
Exercise more, Eat Less, Eat more fruit and Veg cut right back on booze, fat a and sugar????
What UN'News' Item have you read lately?"
Well I do all that anyway and still had one  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"John and Sally Bercow not divorced.
Yet.
Disparate cunts ..united forever by their capacity to envingle contempt..
No news there then.."
I`ve an image of John Bercow in a white toga...reslendent with laurel leaves...eyes ablaze with vacous authority...
Cheered me up no end... |
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Andy Murray is through to the the second round of the Kualar Lumpar Mens Invitational after beating the Kazakhstan #6 Jerzy Skolimowski who took him to a tie break in a tense blah blah fucking blah |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Common people ae heard muttering...there should be a Law against...IT..."
And
The people who preside over the law are heard muttering,,,,,,,, ewwwww Common people, there really ought to be a law against them !!!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Common people ae heard muttering...there should be a Law against...IT...
And
The people who preside over the law are heard muttering,,,,,,,, ewwwww Common people, there really ought to be a law against them !!!
"
Dumbing down and illiteracy are a cunning plan methinks.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Rugby players drink beer....lots of it ....apparently..."
Although it not yet fully established whether its not just the case that many beer drinker simply enjoy playing rugby….
After-all... that man on man contact after a few pints, doesn’t seem so gay...apparently!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Rugby players drink beer....lots of it ....apparently...
Although it not yet fully established whether its not just the case that many beer drinker simply enjoy playing rugby….
After-all... that man on man contact after a few pints, doesn’t seem so gay...apparently!!!"
hahaha...I`ve an image of gnarled grizzlies glowing with an after glow of Timotei and herbal essences...its a brave new world... |
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TV talent show judge said something to other TV talent show judge on TV talent show last night about either TV talent show judge or TV talent show contestant.
TV talent show execs state 'we will have to look into this'. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A nut allergy warning on a packet of peanuts
Think the same warning is on Cadbury's wholenut too.... "
Yes it is
I think "warning! may contain nuts" may as well be printed on mens underwear too |
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By *icheekyMan
over a year ago
Birmingham |
"A nut allergy warning on a packet of peanuts
Think the same warning is on Cadbury's wholenut too....
Yes it is
I think "warning! may contain nuts" may as well be printed on mens underwear too "
My underwear has "Caution - Choking Hazard - Keep away from children." on it.
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"A nut allergy warning on a packet of peanuts
Think the same warning is on Cadbury's wholenut too....
Yes it is
I think "warning! may contain nuts" may as well be printed on mens underwear too "
It also ought to be the sub-title to Fabswingers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Headline news-
Cheeky poster got a spanking lol
With cheek(s) like that, are you sure it wasn't a typo? I'd be sp*nking in no time."
I thought we had discussed your typing lol |
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