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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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because she sounds down, I'll be a clown and promptly run away!!
Granny was a game old bird, she swung the century away
But pension time was left behind and costs didn’t meet the day
She tucked her boobs into her stocking tops and worked on being sober
She turned her heel, slid on the rouge and ended up “arse over”
So Granny sat and thought a while, about the age of swing
Back to the days in black and white is when she did begin
“Am I too old for naughties, can I still cut my rug”
She ponder the nutters one line mails and offered up a shrug
“I will quit when I am ahead”, (she said), and I am still a little lacking
Time will tell if I go to hell, if St Peter sends me packing
Until that time Granny’s keen like mustard, well that’s what the “puddlians” say
And I am off up to Scouser Land, cos its me lucky day!!
(In good faith Granny, don’t hunt me down and hurt me!! No seriously, don’t)
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"  Awaits Granny's riposte. "
I've got a lunch meet (oooooo), so I shall wait for the midden to hit the windmill when I return (I would say shit and fan, but I know that Granny is uncomfortable with electrickery!
P xxx (Peace (armistice, anything, waving a white flag over here!!!) |
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PAULIE (THE FASTEST CREAMER IN THE WEST)
Apologies to Benny Hill x
You could hear the wank thrusts slap as they raced across his shaft,
And the rattle of his bollocks as they swung both to and aft.
And he Creamed his way to Forum Lounge, his cum upon his vest,
His name was Paulie, he was nicknamed FASTEST CREAMER in the WEST.
Now Paulie lusted a pensioner, a Granny known as Dee,
She lived all alone in Liverpool at number 23.
They said she was too good for him, she was haughty, proud and chic,
But Paulie wanted NSA with Gran three times a week.
They called him Paulie, (Paulieeeeeeeeeee)
And he was the FASTEST CREAMER in the WEST
She asked for sensuality , he said, You’ve got it Gran
If you want skill and passion then Paulie is your man.
She said ‘Can you do it wet and slow? Cos wet and slow is best?
He said ‘Gran I got no choice but slow cos I can’t get past your chest!
That tickled old Paulie, (Paulieeeeeeeeeee)
He was the FASTEST CREAMER in the WEST
Now Paulie had a rival, a sexy looking hunk,
Called LovEmOld from Chester with pineapple flavoured spunk.
He tempted Gran with his colgate smile , eight pack and muscled legs,
She dribbled on his Adonis’ belt and butt like ostrich eggs
She nearly dropped at his monster cock and he said, "If you treat me right,
You'll have wet sex every morning and cunny every night."
He knew once she sampled his stamina he'd have her in the bag,
And all Paulie had to offer was a fifty second shag.
Poor Paulie, (Paulieeeeeeeeeee)
He was the FASTEST CREAMER in the WEST
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"PAULIE (THE FASTEST CREAMER IN THE WEST)
Apologies to Benny Hill x
You could hear the wank thrusts slap as they raced across his shaft,
And the rattle of his bollocks as they swung both to and aft.
And he Creamed his way to Forum Lounge, his cum upon his vest,
His name was Paulie, he was nicknamed FASTEST CREAMER in the WEST.
Now Paulie lusted a pensioner, a Granny known as Dee,
She lived all alone in Liverpool at number 23.
They said she was too good for him, she was haughty, proud and chic,
But Paulie wanted NSA with Gran three times a week.
They called him Paulie, (Paulieeeeeeeeeee)
And he was the FASTEST CREAMER in the WEST
She asked for sensuality , he said, You’ve got it Gran
If you want skill and passion then Paulie is your man.
She said ‘Can you do it wet and slow? Cos wet and slow is best?
He said ‘Gran I got no choice but slow cos I can’t get past your chest!
That tickled old Paulie, (Paulieeeeeeeeeee)
He was the FASTEST CREAMER in the WEST
Now Paulie had a rival, a sexy looking hunk,
Called LovEmOld from Chester with pineapple flavoured spunk.
He tempted Gran with his colgate smile , eight pack and muscled legs,
She dribbled on his Adonis’ belt and butt like ostrich eggs
She nearly dropped at his monster cock and he said, "If you treat me right,
You'll have wet sex every morning and cunny every night."
He knew once she sampled his stamina he'd have her in the bag,
And all Paulie had to offer was a fifty second shag.
Poor Paulie, (Paulieeeeeeeeeee)
He was the FASTEST CREAMER in the WEST
"
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Oh Granny thinks she’s clever, wisdom comes with age
And Pauly’s been off a creaming (which mildly tastes of sage)
See he worries for the friction burns, in truth he’s a cowardly bloke
Cos Granny’s out of KY and he hates to choke on smoke
So Granny’ doubts Paul’s prowess, but he isn’t full of dismay
Creaming’s good for the skin they say and cheaper than Olay
He doubts he can win this fight, but still he must persist
Cos Granny’s at the gin again and swaying to a list
Pauly is liking Granny, and even more her rhyme
He’s thinking that it might be true, he’s always short of time
But Granny you are a treasure, a voice from times long distant past
And for you I’d make an effort and hopefully I could last
But I aint bringing no kindling, cos I am a’fearing of the fire
When the friction is a’chaffing and the heat rises in the briar
But winter is a’coming Gran, and pensions they ain’t on the rise
So a bit of warmth between the thighs, is perhaps a welcome surprise
Oh Granny dear we’ll wait for summer, and the sap to travel up
And your teeth to be a fizzing in that homely bedside cup
Pray be patient Gran, but careful with your words
Cos this site can be so frightening for internet based nerds
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