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Scotland Bans Spanking ?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Does anyone spank parents? Seems a little disrespectful."
Depending on your opinion you may feel the Scottish government has spanked the rights of parents to administer light disciple to their own children  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Its about time the Scots dealt with their smack problem.  "
Clem you nearly had me there 
I was about to say what's the difference between spank and smack |
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It's an extension of existing legislation.
Currently it is allowable to smack, without an implement, between neck and knee level, and not excessively.
This new proposal just gives children the same protection against assault as adults.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anyone spank parents? Seems a little disrespectful."
That's how I read it. 
Spanking, a smack on the ass as a quick punishment is different to a beating some kids get. Maybe that's what they're trying to stop. Those percentage who do t know where to stop when disciplining kids.
I dunno, about banning, but I never had to smack/hit/spank my kids to teach them right from wrong, and I was raised differently (I was beaten). So my views are a bit skewed. No child should feel sca_ed. I agree with a ban. |
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Bring back the cane.
Kids are far too unruly nowadays.
Drop the PC B.S. and get back to good old fashioned values.
In most cases it's down to poor parenting and kids being seen as fashion accessories.
Being dumped in nurseries instead of being bought up by their parents won't help either. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't see the need to spank children, it is repeatedly slapping a child. Totally unnecessary in my opinion. It is far more effective these days to threaten to take something away from a child, like internet access, their pc or similar. So I agree with Scotland's ban. Violence is never an answer, smacking is violence. XXX |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Bring back the cane.
Kids are far too unruly nowadays.
Drop the PC B.S. and get back to good old fashioned values.
In most cases it's down to poor parenting and kids being seen as fashion accessories.
Being dumped in nurseries instead of being bought up by their parents won't help either."
I don't agree with your statements, no way should we bring back the cane, that's a ridiculous idea.
Yes kids go to nursery earlier now, the places have been made available by government and it benefits the child. If you are talking about parents who put their kids in nursery so they can work, that's also a stupid comment as people have to work sometimes. Most people don't see kids as fashion accessories. Obviously you're an anti child person. There are loads of very well behaved kids about, so don't tar all kids with the same brush. There were unruly kids back in the days of the cane, and also a lot of skiving kids hanging about in town during school hours.
My daughter has had behaviour problems, this is not because of poor parenting, being dumped in a nursery ect. This is because she has severe learning difficulties and we have been sta_ed at by intolerant people like yourself who are ignorant of facts. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Bring back the cane.
Kids are far too unruly nowadays.
Drop the PC B.S. and get back to good old fashioned values.
In most cases it's down to poor parenting and kids being seen as fashion accessories.
Being dumped in nurseries instead of being bought up by their parents won't help either."
I heard spanking kids gives them a nasty streak as they grow up!? I certainly don't like to see it and would probably lead to a confrontation if I did |
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We are all entitled to our view on how to bring up our children.
You can do it the PC way, we do it ours as we are not sheep or read books on parenting that are written by authors who don't even have children.
Kids use these ridiculous rules against their teachers and even their parents.
Agree if it's abuse but short sharp discipline worked fine in our day. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally I think it depends on the child. One of mine responded to a stern talking too, but a slap had no effect at all, the other would just laugh if I told him off but the threat of a slap put him in his place.
In reality I think they both got a slap once, but no more than once. The youngest possibly never had a slap. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you was to punch smack an adult your would get potentially done for gbh... So why is smacking children ok?
Not for us as parents many other ways to teach children right from wrong.
On the other hand.. I don't mind a good spanking  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We are all entitled to our view on how to bring up our children.
You can do it the PC way, we do it ours as we are not sheep or read books on parenting that are written by authors who don't even have children.
Kids use these ridiculous rules against their teachers and even their parents.
Agree if it's abuse but short sharp discipline worked fine in our day."
If you want to go around whacking your kids behind close doors that's on your watch, just seems like you can't have the patience for other means of discipline. But go around whacking your kids in public and see what happens... I know I'm not the only one who wouldn't stand around and watch |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you was to punch smack an adult your would get potentially done for gbh... So why is smacking children ok?
Not for us as parents many other ways to teach children right from wrong.
On the other hand.. I don't mind a good spanking "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No I dont. Parents need more support not a nanny state..i do not think smacking does any harm.. and disagree that it's violence.. as it should never be done in anger.
I'd happily see the corporal punishment brought back into schools and wish the police/ teachers etc had more power over the youth of today. Kids have to much power as it is and adults involved have to pussy foot around.. if I was out of line I would have got a thick ear... or the belt or my mum's slipper... didn't scar me for life but I actively avoided any thing that would land me in that situation |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't agree with spanking
But it never did me no harm for being naughty
my only points being
Some culture spank "
You can't hide ur profile when u have a awesome avatar. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No I dont. Parents need more support not a nanny state..i do not think smacking does any harm.. and disagree that it's violence.. as it should never be done in anger.
I'd happily see the corporal punishment brought back into schools and wish the police/ teachers etc had more power over the youth of today. Kids have to much power as it is and adults involved have to pussy foot around.. if I was out of line I would have got a thick ear... or the belt or my mum's slipper... didn't scar me for life but I actively avoided any thing that would land me in that situation "
I have to agree that the thing that kept me in line at School was the "Belt"
.
There were some teachers that were known, who could give it hard and you simply did not mess around in their class, 6 of the belt had your hands numb for a good hour and you learned your mistakes.
.
Corporal Punishment was good for me, I am glad they had it in Schools when I was a kid and a teen, it simply made me tow the line. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No I dont. Parents need more support not a nanny state..i do not think smacking does any harm.. and disagree that it's violence.. as it should never be done in anger.
I'd happily see the corporal punishment brought back into schools and wish the police/ teachers etc had more power over the youth of today. Kids have to much power as it is and adults involved have to pussy foot around.. if I was out of line I would have got a thick ear... or the belt or my mum's slipper... didn't scar me for life but I actively avoided any thing that would land me in that situation
I have to agree that the thing that kept me in line at School was the "Belt"
.
There were some teachers that were known, who could give it hard and you simply did not mess around in their class, 6 of the belt had your hands numb for a good hour and you learned your mistakes.
.
Corporal Punishment was good for me, I am glad they had it in Schools when I was a kid and a teen, it simply made me tow the line."
Or did it make you more devious at not getting caught?
I got several whippings at school for smoking,finally stopped at age thirty.Not a great argument in favour of corporal punishment.
I was convinced that some people went into the teaching profession specifically for the opportunities to beat small children. |
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Short sharp shock smack on hand or bottom was good for myself and brothers. Even adult animals sometimes give a harmless "nip" ro teach their young right from wrong. What I will say though, as I got older, stopping me from going out to play with friends or tv ban was a much more effective punishment. |
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"There were some teachers that were known, who could give it hard and you simply did not mess around in their class, 6 of the belt had your hands numb for a good hour and you learned your mistakes."
Though presumably didn't get much handwriting done |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No I dont. Parents need more support not a nanny state..i do not think smacking does any harm.. and disagree that it's violence.. as it should never be done in anger.
I'd happily see the corporal punishment brought back into schools and wish the police/ teachers etc had more power over the youth of today. Kids have to much power as it is and adults involved have to pussy foot around.. if I was out of line I would have got a thick ear... or the belt or my mum's slipper... didn't scar me for life but I actively avoided any thing that would land me in that situation
I have to agree that the thing that kept me in line at School was the "Belt"
.
There were some teachers that were known, who could give it hard and you simply did not mess around in their class, 6 of the belt had your hands numb for a good hour and you learned your mistakes.
.
Corporal Punishment was good for me, I am glad they had it in Schools when I was a kid and a teen, it simply made me tow the line.
Or did it make you more devious at not getting caught?
I got several whippings at school for smoking,finally stopped at age thirty.Not a great argument in favour of corporal punishment.
I was convinced that some people went into the teaching profession specifically for the opportunities to beat small children."
But if you hadn't been whipped you wouldn't have stopped at thirty  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Like it or not this generation of children are very different to any other. There food has been totally messed about with. There are a lot more condition s an behaviour problem s. Horemones in milk an meet. An a lot more mothers are given medications during pregnancy. You can’t beat the damage caused to these kids out of them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No I dont. Parents need more support not a nanny state..i do not think smacking does any harm.. and disagree that it's violence.. as it should never be done in anger.
I'd happily see the corporal punishment brought back into schools and wish the police/ teachers etc had more power over the youth of today. Kids have to much power as it is and adults involved have to pussy foot around.. if I was out of line I would have got a thick ear... or the belt or my mum's slipper... didn't scar me for life but I actively avoided any thing that would land me in that situation
I have to agree that the thing that kept me in line at School was the "Belt"
.
There were some teachers that were known, who could give it hard and you simply did not mess around in their class, 6 of the belt had your hands numb for a good hour and you learned your mistakes.
.
Corporal Punishment was good for me, I am glad they had it in Schools when I was a kid and a teen, it simply made me tow the line.
Or did it make you more devious at not getting caught?
I got several whippings at school for smoking,finally stopped at age thirty.Not a great argument in favour of corporal punishment.
I was convinced that some people went into the teaching profession specifically for the opportunities to beat small children."
Absolutely not; I knew I had done wrong and accepted the punishment, the punishment fitted the crime |
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When you think about it the shocking thing is that hitting your children even needs to be legislated against.
We're encouraged to report the domestic abuse of adults. If someone found it acceptable to slap their partner even once for doing something wrong most people would find it reprehensible. Why on earth is it ok to do that to children?  |
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I received a few slippers across my legs as a child, and more than a few canings or ruler over the knuckles at school.
I was very wild & rebellious and can say without a shadow of a doubt, the thought of getting another belt, stopped me going off the rails.
My youngest son has severe ADHD, inherited from me.
Trying to enforce any rules in my house with him is near on impossible, he doesn't listen to rational reason. He ran riot at school, excluded, new school, excluded, new school & excluded again, he now attends a local APC unit.
I don't know if he'd be different if I'd occasionally smacked him as a child, but there are times I wish I had tried that approach |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Like it or not this generation of children are very different to any other. There food has been totally messed about with. There are a lot more condition s an behaviour problem s. Horemones in milk an meet. An a lot more mothers are given medications during pregnancy. You can’t beat the damage caused to these kids out of them. "
On the other hand, what was simply dubbed be as being naughty and deserving a good hiding back in the 70s is now being diagnosed as a disability and the kids get rewarded for their behaviour.
Mine only misbehaved once in a supermarket. I spoke to the security guard and told the kids he told me off because they were being naughty and they couldn't come back again if they didn't behave.
They never ran around Tesco's again. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I received a few slippers across my legs as a child, and more than a few canings or ruler over the knuckles at school.
I was very wild & rebellious and can say without a shadow of a doubt, the thought of getting another belt, stopped me going off the rails.
My youngest son has severe ADHD, inherited from me.
Trying to enforce any rules in my house with him is near on impossible, he doesn't listen to rational reason. He ran riot at school, excluded, new school, excluded, new school & excluded again, he now attends a local APC unit.
I don't know if he'd be different if I'd occasionally smacked him as a child, but there are times I wish I had tried that approach "
Can I ask if you were diagnosed as having ADHD as a child? |
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By *m3232Man
over a year ago
maidenhead |
"Bring back the cane.
Kids are far too unruly nowadays.
Drop the PC B.S. and get back to good old fashioned values.
In most cases it's down to poor parenting and kids being seen as fashion accessories.
Being dumped in nurseries instead of being bought up by their parents won't help either."
Correct. Also it’s to easy for kids to play computer games killing people |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can imagine frustrated parent threatening their kids with "anymore of that and I,ll take you Carlisle".
.
Noooooooo, anything but carlisle"
Best posts of the thread |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't see a problem with a short, sharp smack to the hand or leg does any harm.
As long as an explanation is given and a warning or two is offe_ed beforehand.
How long will it be before we aren't allowed to take our children's possessions away or ground them because it's mental abuse? This already happens in schools, no more standing facing the wall, no "humiliating" them infront of their peers etc. |
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"We are all entitled to our view on how to bring up our children.
You can do it the PC way, we do it ours as we are not sheep or read books on parenting that are written by authors who don't even have children.
Kids use these ridiculous rules against their teachers and even their parents.
Agree if it's abuse but short sharp discipline worked fine in our day."
there is nothing wrong with a little discipline . kids show no respect now these days .they know how to play the game . |
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"I don't see a problem with a short, sharp smack to the hand or leg does any harm.
As long as an explanation is given and a warning or two is offe_ed beforehand.
How long will it be before we aren't allowed to take our children's possessions away or ground them because it's mental abuse? This already happens in schools, no more standing facing the wall, no "humiliating" them infront of their peers etc."
I'm glad that there's no more humiliating children in front of their peers. If that happened in the work place it would rightly be construed as bullying. If I consistently turned up late for work and was made to stand facing the wall I think it would be unacceptable. I don't think it's acceptable to do it to kids. It may well teach them to behave but it also teaches them that its acceptable to treat people like that and that kids have to accept that adults will bully and humiliate them if they don't conform. |
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"We are all entitled to our view on how to bring up our children.
You can do it the PC way, we do it ours as we are not sheep or read books on parenting that are written by authors who don't even have children.
Kids use these ridiculous rules against their teachers and even their parents.
Agree if it's abuse but short sharp discipline worked fine in our day. there is nothing wrong with a little discipline . kids show no respect now these days .they know how to play the game ."
"Some" kids show no respect. I come in to regular contact with teenagers and the vast majority are respectful, polite and hard working. |
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By *he ODBMan
over a year ago
glasgow |
If you raise your kids properly they shouldnt need to be smacked. Never lifted my hand to my kid and she's a great example of a polite respectful child. When she needs disciplined removing all her fun stuff achieves more than a sore arse ever could. No electronics , net , dancing , swimming etc. A weekend staring at 4 walls or the pages of a book can work wonders. Smacking a child is akin to shocking a dog to train it. It may well get them to stop unruly behaviour but its not the only way and easily the least desirable |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We are all entitled to our view on how to bring up our children.
You can do it the PC way, we do it ours as we are not sheep or read books on parenting that are written by authors who don't even have children.
Kids use these ridiculous rules against their teachers and even their parents.
Agree if it's abuse but short sharp discipline worked fine in our day. If you want to go around whacking your kids behind close doors that's on your watch, just seems like you can't have the patience for other means of discipline. But go around whacking your kids in public and see what happens... I know I'm not the only one who wouldn't stand around and watch"
.
What would you do? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Bring back the cane.
Kids are far too unruly nowadays.
Drop the PC B.S. and get back to good old fashioned values.
In most cases it's down to poor parenting and kids being seen as fashion accessories.
Being dumped in nurseries instead of being bought up by their parents won't help either."
|
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By *wisted2000Woman
over a year ago
under my rock cleethorpes |
I don’t agree with spanking as a punishment for children because I believe it teaches them to use pain in negative ways (if someone did wrong use pain to show them) but I also think it’s the parents choice on what they do and how, yet on the other hand some do and will go too far and give more then is needed, so for me it’s a very mixed bag, just my humble opinion |
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its the thin end of the wedge where children will have more power over their parents. That will lead to more crimes being committed due to no discipline which in turn creates more revenue for the court system, kerching
It makes you wonder whether your children are yours or the governments? The state should keep the noses out of private affairs of families
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When I shit the bed my dad took the sheets and rubbed them all over my face, and it never did me any harm.
28 I was.
Oh.. so it's not a beard then?
"
It seems to me that a lot of people who say 'it never did me any harm' are now the kind of people who advocate beating children. Never did any harm? I'm not so sure. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When I shit the bed my dad took the sheets and rubbed them all over my face, and it never did me any harm.
28 I was.
Oh.. so it's not a beard then?
It seems to me that a lot of people who say 'it never did me any harm' are now the kind of people who advocate beating children. Never did any harm? I'm not so sure."
there is a big big difference from a smack to a beating... I was smacked and belted/slippe_ed as a child.
I have used smacking with my own and not ashamed of that.
They need to stop making the children the ones with all the power. Even at school.. can't do this or that as punishments. Like stand them outside the room. Make them go stand outside the heads office etc. Stand in a corner. None of it did any harm but you certainly didn't want to do it.
In fact most schools now barely dare give out detentions and parents have to give permission. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When I shit the bed my dad took the sheets and rubbed them all over my face, and it never did me any harm.
28 I was.
Oh.. so it's not a beard then?
It seems to me that a lot of people who say 'it never did me any harm' are now the kind of people who advocate beating children. Never did any harm? I'm not so sure. there is a big big difference from a smack to a beating... I was smacked and belted/slippe_ed as a child.
I have used smacking with my own and not ashamed of that.
They need to stop making the children the ones with all the power. Even at school.. can't do this or that as punishments. Like stand them outside the room. Make them go stand outside the heads office etc. Stand in a corner. None of it did any harm but you certainly didn't want to do it.
In fact most schools now barely dare give out detentions and parents have to give permission. "
To a large person delivering the blow,it may only be a smack but to a small person receiving the blow it may seem more like a beating. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i think its fucking archaic! You can't go round physically abusing adults with no consequence...cannot understand the skewed thinking that thinks its ok to do it to a child...and yes, i was smacked as a child and i don't think it did me any harm at all....but i really dont think thats the point! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"its the thin end of the wedge where children will have more power over their parents. That will lead to more crimes being committed due to no discipline which in turn creates more revenue for the court system, kerching
It makes you wonder whether your children are yours or the governments? The state should keep the noses out of private affairs of families
"
maybe take a look at countries that have had it banned for years, and their crimes stats! your argument really doesn't hold up! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The jewelled glove, the fedler, the strap, the cane, the belt and its buckle. The slipper and being lifted off the ground and throttled, being dragged into the garden and having one’s face shoved in their food to eat like a pig were all punishments meted out when I was a child. But of course that was just good old fashioned discipline. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i think its fucking archaic! You can't go round physically abusing adults with no consequence...cannot understand the skewed thinking that thinks its ok to do it to a child...and yes, i was smacked as a child and i don't think it did me any harm at all....but i really dont think thats the point! "
the point is that systematically they are shifting the power balance in favour of the kids. I have smacked my kids hand in public and would have had something to say to anyone that pulled me up on it. ( actually the only comment i ever got was a lady saying she was surprised I da_ed in this day an age but well done)
Smacking isn't about hurting a child..
Police now can barely do anything to unruly teens for fear of back lash... And there is no way I would have spoken to adults the way children seem to speak to them to today.
The rule as it was precious was fine. It stated you could smack as long as there was no mark left. |
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
Cambridge |
"If you was to punch smack an adult your would get potentially done for gbh... So why is smacking children ok?
Not for us as parents many other ways to teach children right from wrong.
On the other hand.. I don't mind a good spanking "
If you sent an adult to their room and wouldn't let them out you would be prosecuted for false imprisonment, yet you would do it to a child.
Adult to adult interaction is different to parent to child interaction. Look at transactional analysis. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Kids should never be beaten but try reasoning with a baby who has been pushing toast into the sky box and is now moving menacingly towards an electrical socket. A small smack never did anyone any harm. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i think its fucking archaic! You can't go round physically abusing adults with no consequence...cannot understand the skewed thinking that thinks its ok to do it to a child...and yes, i was smacked as a child and i don't think it did me any harm at all....but i really dont think thats the point! the point is that systematically they are shifting the power balance in favour of the kids. I have smacked my kids hand in public and would have had something to say to anyone that pulled me up on it. ( actually the only comment i ever got was a lady saying she was surprised I da_ed in this day an age but well done)
Smacking isn't about hurting a child..
Police now can barely do anything to unruly teens for fear of back lash... And there is no way I would have spoken to adults the way children seem to speak to them to today.
The rule as it was precious was fine. It stated you could smack as long as there was no mark left. "
Power balance? Is being a parent all about power?
You can smack as long as no mark is left? Well,I suppose a child with too many bruises may arouse suspicion that the parents were excercising their 'power' a little too enthusiastically. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The jewelled glove, the fedler, the strap, the cane, the belt and its buckle. The slipper and being lifted off the ground and throttled, being dragged into the garden and having one’s face shoved in their food to eat like a pig were all punishments meted out when I was a child. But of course that was just good old fashioned discipline."
I’ll add a few more - being lifted off the ground by your sideburns, standing up for a chemistry quiz and if you got the answer wrong being hit in the back and stomach so hard it winded you, being knuckled on your head, having board dusters and big bunches of keys thrown at you for speaking.....
Good old fashioned discipline .... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Bring back the cane.
Kids are far too unruly nowadays.
Drop the PC B.S. and get back to good old fashioned values.
In most cases it's down to poor parenting and kids being seen as fashion accessories.
Being dumped in nurseries instead of being bought up by their parents won't help either."
Spot on. 100% |
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"I received a few slippers across my legs as a child, and more than a few canings or ruler over the knuckles at school.
I was very wild & rebellious and can say without a shadow of a doubt, the thought of getting another belt, stopped me going off the rails.
My youngest son has severe ADHD, inherited from me.
Trying to enforce any rules in my house with him is near on impossible, he doesn't listen to rational reason. He ran riot at school, excluded, new school, excluded, new school & excluded again, he now attends a local APC unit.
I don't know if he'd be different if I'd occasionally smacked him as a child, but there are times I wish I had tried that approach
Can I ask if you were diagnosed as having ADHD as a child?"
No! I suspected in my 20s, but was only when my youngest diagnosed I got it officially for me - he literally is a repeat of me all over
None of my other children have it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The jewelled glove, the fedler, the strap, the cane, the belt and its buckle. The slipper and being lifted off the ground and throttled, being dragged into the garden and having one’s face shoved in their food to eat like a pig were all punishments meted out when I was a child. But of course that was just good old fashioned discipline.
I’ll add a few more - being lifted off the ground by your sideburns, standing up for a chemistry quiz and if you got the answer wrong being hit in the back and stomach so hard it winded you, being knuckled on your head, having board dusters and big bunches of keys thrown at you for speaking.....
Good old fashioned discipline ...."
Kneeling in the front of a classroom with a two inch rubber bung in your mouth with saliva dripping down you while your arms are outstretched in a crucifix position for having the temerity to talk during a lesson.
.... Good old fashioned discipline |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There is a vast difference between walking up to a stranger in the street and slapping them and offering a swift smack to the hand or leg of a child who is otherwise shown love and respect except when they push the boundaries.
Making a child sit on a step or sending them to their room IS humiliation, the same as sending them out of the class room.
Punishment is punishment after all. Soon we won't be able to punish children at all.
Interested in how some people here would deal with a 2 year old who bit another child? Reason with them? Tell them that they hurt the other child? Good luck! Children of that age have no comprehension of empathy.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you was to punch smack an adult your would get potentially done for gbh... So why is smacking children ok?
Not for us as parents many other ways to teach children right from wrong.
On the other hand.. I don't mind a good spanking
If you sent an adult to their room and wouldn't let them out you would be prosecuted for false imprisonment, yet you would do it to a child.
Adult to adult interaction is different to parent to child interaction. Look at transactional analysis."
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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago
Hillside desolate |
"Bring back the cane.
Kids are far too unruly nowadays.
Drop the PC B.S. and get back to good old fashioned values.
In most cases it's down to poor parenting and kids being seen as fashion accessories.
Being dumped in nurseries instead of being bought up by their parents won't help either.
Spot on. 100%"
Nonsense. 100% |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Smaking kids seems very lazy.
But those who like doing it seem to really like doing it and won't be put off by anything."
no one likes doing it.. you feel horrendous after wards. Why would a parent enjoy it. And btw 6 kids and provably smacked in single figures |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Power balance? Is being a parent all about power?
You can smack as long as no mark is left? Well,I suppose a child with too many bruises may arouse suspicion that the parents were excercising their 'power' a little too enthusiastically."
No it's not all about power but all to often I deal with parents and children where the kids rule the roost as due to agency interventions the parents daren't smack.. remove toys. Send to room . Etc etc even stair time is under threat as being emotionally damaging
Schools have struggled for a long time with he sanctions on what they can and can't do and no one can say that behaviour in schools is not deteriorating.. And I am meaning teachers hands are tied..punishments mostly involve sending a child home. Or if the parents agree ( often they dont) the child can be put in isolation.. which is now being discussed as to whether it's damaging.
Parents are meant to be in control.. but ive had parents in tears because their little dear has threatened them with a call to childline because they punished them ( we aren't talking about smacking either) even had one parent called in and a serious investigation because in retaliation to the Xbox being removed for bad behaviour the child went to school and cried being physically hit and starved. Eventually the truth came out.... but not before damage was done to the family. The parent still does not dare punish for fear of further accusations...
And that's not an isolated story either... so yes I do feel that the youth of today know that as a rule they have us adults by the short and curlies.
If id back chatted an adult like some of these kids speak to police now....id have been grabbed by the collar and frog marched to my home and then slipped.. grounded and known not to do it again
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you can smack kids why would you stop there, tea not on the table let's give the Mrs a clout. You can teach kids without beating them, if you get hit you just get more hysterical which heightens any emotions your feeling, so your feeling angry as a kid you do something naughty you get whacked and then your in pain and even more angry and you feel more naughty. It's lazy parenting. If you smack a child, not everyone will just 'smack' them on the bum why can't you do it to everyone. It's a bad example and not the hallmark of an evolved society. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Power balance? Is being a parent all about power?
You can smack as long as no mark is left? Well,I suppose a child with too many bruises may arouse suspicion that the parents were excercising their 'power' a little too enthusiastically.
No it's not all about power but all to often I deal with parents and children where the kids rule the roost as due to agency interventions the parents daren't smack.. remove toys. Send to room . Etc etc even stair time is under threat as being emotionally damaging
Schools have struggled for a long time with he sanctions on what they can and can't do and no one can say that behaviour in schools is not deteriorating.. And I am meaning teachers hands are tied..punishments mostly involve sending a child home. Or if the parents agree ( often they dont) the child can be put in isolation.. which is now being discussed as to whether it's damaging.
Parents are meant to be in control.. but ive had parents in tears because their little dear has threatened them with a call to childline because they punished them ( we aren't talking about smacking either) even had one parent called in and a serious investigation because in retaliation to the Xbox being removed for bad behaviour the child went to school and cried being physically hit and starved. Eventually the truth came out.... but not before damage was done to the family. The parent still does not dare punish for fear of further accusations...
And that's not an isolated story either... so yes I do feel that the youth of today know that as a rule they have us adults by the short and curlies.
If id back chatted an adult like some of these kids speak to police now....id have been grabbed by the collar and frog marched to my home and then slipped.. grounded and known not to do it again
"
Not everyone will just give them one small smack, people will take it too far just like that child abusing the current system, there are plenty of adults who will do the same and start children down for pleasure |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If you can smack kids why would you stop there, tea not on the table let's give the Mrs a clout. You can teach kids without beating them, if you get hit you just get more hysterical which heightens any emotions your feeling, so your feeling angry as a kid you do something naughty you get whacked and then your in pain and even more angry and you feel more naughty. It's lazy parenting. If you smack a child, not everyone will just 'smack' them on the bum why can't you do it to everyone. It's a bad example and not the hallmark of an evolved society."
Well said |
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I have lightly spanked my youngest son on two occasions - and felt sick for hours afterwards.
My youngest daughter is an angel. I have never had to do it. Nor for my eldest two.
We have often had to return home from so many places when my son plays up too badly. I am sick of the way people look at my partner and I when my child is kicking, screaming or trying to run away just because he doesn't get his own way.
Once, when we were in a shop, my partner had to take him outside where he proceeded to scream at the top of his lungs. Whilst in the queue I had to listen to the shopkeeper discuss with the customer in front of me how bad the parents must be and how my son needed a bloody good hiding.
I kind of enjoyed listening to it before revealing myself as the bad father, and asking if they had any tips that didn't involve assaulting my son.
I have no idea what the right answer is. I love the idea of never smacking and hope to God I never have to again. No parent wants to smack their child.
Luckily, my son is beginning to behave better as he gets older, although he still has his moments. After having to carry him a mile to my car recently my face was cove_ed in scratches and my blood. That, on top of concerned peoples' looks all the way wondering if I was abducting him or just a very cruel parent. Not many supportive looks, I can tell you.
Was I sca_ed of my parents that smacked me? Only enough to behave myself. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If you can smack kids why would you stop there, tea not on the table let's give the Mrs a clout. You can teach kids without beating them, if you get hit you just get more hysterical which heightens any emotions your feeling, so your feeling angry as a kid you do something naughty you get whacked and then your in pain and even more angry and you feel more naughty. It's lazy parenting. If you smack a child, not everyone will just 'smack' them on the bum why can't you do it to everyone. It's a bad example and not the hallmark of an evolved society.
"
you don't hit them... or beat them. And sorry but I believe all this new age crap is responsible for a lot of the behaviour issues and even with my training think that in some instances a smack ( not hit.. punch.. or beating ) is the only course.
I am very old fashioned with my parenting. Being that my kids are long since out of the age where a smack is given ( now it's removal of internet/phone/Xbox etc) I dont need to worry about it anymore.
I'd be wanting to know what my kids had done if a policeman had given them a clip round the ear... ( not that they could these days) not harping on about the injustice of it. Id be embarrassed.. and apologetic.
A friend of mine recently had to defend her actions after another mum reported her.. her 2 year old keeps biting other people and kids... so one day after she had kept doing it and she bit her back. Not hard.. not like she was the other kids... but she stopped doing it. Yet she was accused of harming her child by another parent who witnessed it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Actually the children's act states that 'reasonable force' can be used by the parental authority to discipline a child.
But define reasonable?? What is reasonable to one is not to another. We all have differing views and parental styles. And of
'Force'? But doesn't state the level. Force to me implies use of violence.
So, to change the law, they would have to change the wording in the children's act to give us clarity. |
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By *mmabluTV/TS
over a year ago
upton wirral |
"Bring back the cane.
Kids are far too unruly nowadays.
Drop the PC B.S. and get back to good old fashioned values.
In most cases it's down to poor parenting and kids being seen as fashion accessories.
Being dumped in nurseries instead of being bought up by their parents won't help either."
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Actually the children's act states that 'reasonable force' can be used by the parental authority to discipline a child.
But define reasonable?? What is reasonable to one is not to another. We all have differing views and parental styles. And of
'Force'? But doesn't state the level. Force to me implies use of violence.
So, to change the law, they would have to change the wording in the children's act to give us clarity. "
I’m sure the adults that abused/assaulted me, my friends and millions of others thought they were only using reasonable force |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Hereford |
"Bring back the cane.
Kids are far too unruly nowadays.
Drop the PC B.S. and get back to good old fashioned values.
In most cases it's down to poor parenting and kids being seen as fashion accessories.
Being dumped in nurseries instead of being bought up by their parents won't help either."
If you think that beating kids will stop them from being unruly, you are having a laugh.
My old man will tell you how he was caned at school (one of his teachers used to beat them with his shoes, oddly), and his old man (my grandad) used to give him the belt or box his ears.
He ran away at 14 and was only found when he was arrested for being homeless in Hastings (He'd come from Salford).
He led a pretty coulorful life in his youth after that, and always says that his hat_ed of authority figures came from the beatings he recieved. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Main question is how are they going to enforce this?
A fine? Kid starves or misses out on stuff due to no money.
Custodial? Kids go into care.
Criminal record? Potentially lose job, home, etc... kid suffers again.
Personally, I don't hold with violence of any sort towards children. But have met a few over the years who would have been better smacked once when young. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Main question is how are they going to enforce this?
A fine? Kid starves or misses out on stuff due to no money.
Custodial? Kids go into care.
Criminal record? Potentially lose job, home, etc... kid suffers again.
Personally, I don't hold with violence of any sort towards children. But have met a few over the years who would have been better smacked once when young. "
and what's to stop kids accusing their parents when they punish them in other ways..or threatening to. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Smacking is just lazy parenting.
The 'behaviour is deteriorating in schools argument' is bollocks too. Schools with effective approaches to discipline have excellent behaviour. The culture in most schools today is light years better than I experienced. |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Hereford |
"Smacking is just lazy parenting.
The 'behaviour is deteriorating in schools argument' is bollocks too. Schools with effective approaches to discipline have excellent behaviour. The culture in most schools today is light years better than I experienced."
Abso-fucking-lutely.
I despised school, in spite of being reasonably clever.
I was inc_edibly pleasantly surprised by how schools had changed when it came for my daughter to go to school. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And just to add: As a guy, if your dad smacks/beats you as a kid, there is always going to be that fateful day when you have a fist-fight with your old man. It isn't pretty. "
I don't think being smacked as a child means you would then get into a fight with your dad.. we are talking about very occasional smacking not regular incidents... I think I can remember a handful of times and only once from my dad..
Not counting a flick of the ear for cheek...
I dont agree with it being lazy parenting just different methods. And to the lasy saying schools behaviour isn't worse... it is a lot worse. And no I dont think its from lack of the Cane more ongoing changes that have changed the way children view authority..
I'm hoping to work in education again soon.. And no end of my teaching friends have told me how hard its getting unless you work in an exceptional school.
I'd happily have my kids doing detentions if needed and always back the school on things.. but mostly schools are not only suffering with badly behaving students but parents that think its okay to behave badly too.. but that's a whole different issue.
The op was about should the UK also ban smacking and no I dont nor will I ever think that they should be able to ban it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You're focused on a minority of little shit bags. The vast majority of kids now are well rounded, well educated, decent kids. Open your blinkers.
As for the thing about getting physical with your Dad - this very likely IS the case. What else would you expect when you teach kids violence?! Where do you think the 'didn't do me any harm' shite stems from?
It isn't necessary to hit a child. Ever. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Smacking is just lazy parenting.
The 'behaviour is deteriorating in schools argument' is bollocks too. Schools with effective approaches to discipline have excellent behaviour. The culture in most schools today is light years better than I experienced.
Abso-fucking-lutely.
I despised school, in spite of being reasonably clever.
I was inc_edibly pleasantly surprised by how schools had changed when it came for my daughter to go to school. "
This |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Hereford |
"And just to add: As a guy, if your dad smacks/beats you as a kid, there is always going to be that fateful day when you have a fist-fight with your old man. It isn't pretty. I don't think being smacked as a child means you would then get into a fight with your dad.. we are talking about very occasional smacking not regular incidents... I think I can remember a handful of times and only once from my dad..
Not counting a flick of the ear for cheek...
I dont agree with it being lazy parenting just different methods. And to the lasy saying schools behaviour isn't worse... it is a lot worse. And no I dont think its from lack of the Cane more ongoing changes that have changed the way children view authority..
I'm hoping to work in education again soon.. And no end of my teaching friends have told me how hard its getting unless you work in an exceptional school.
I'd happily have my kids doing detentions if needed and always back the school on things.. but mostly schools are not only suffering with badly behaving students but parents that think its okay to behave badly too.. but that's a whole different issue.
The op was about should the UK also ban smacking and no I dont nor will I ever think that they should be able to ban it. "
Oh, it does.
All c_edit to my old boy, he tried. I know now the nature of the "good old fashioned" abuse that he recieved as a kid. Occasionally, he lost his rag and smacked me. And, because we have similar genetics, I remembe_ed, and I knew that as soon as I was bigger than him, I'd show him how it felt (obviosly I realise now how niaeve that is), and so; when I was 18ish, we had a falling out and had a full on fistfight, and destroyed part of my mums fitted kitchen.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Main question is how are they going to enforce this?
A fine? Kid starves or misses out on stuff due to no money.
Custodial? Kids go into care.
Criminal record? Potentially lose job, home, etc... kid suffers again.
Personally, I don't hold with violence of any sort towards children. But have met a few over the years who would have been better smacked once when young. "
I concur with this sentiment and that that others share a rare smack and only smack to the bum or gentle clip round the ear can do wonders on the odd child, more often than not though it doesn't work and aggravates the situation. But back to my main point which is allowing kids to be hit is a step backwards for society as a whole and will lead to massive abuses all over. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Main question is how are they going to enforce this?
A fine? Kid starves or misses out on stuff due to no money.
Custodial? Kids go into care.
Criminal record? Potentially lose job, home, etc... kid suffers again.
Personally, I don't hold with violence of any sort towards children. But have met a few over the years who would have been better smacked once when young. and what's to stop kids accusing their parents when they punish them in other ways..or threatening to. "
I fundamentally disagree with you. My experience is completely at odds with yours and I find the idea of me hitting my son in any way abhorrent. I realise that is conditioned by not wanting any child to experience what I did, but I also realise that there but for good grace go I. I’m glad I never took out my feelings of frustration, anger and fear of losing control on my son physically and I still feel pangs of shame for the times when I couldn’t control my temper enough not to bawl at him. |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Hereford |
"Main question is how are they going to enforce this?
A fine? Kid starves or misses out on stuff due to no money.
Custodial? Kids go into care.
Criminal record? Potentially lose job, home, etc... kid suffers again.
Personally, I don't hold with violence of any sort towards children. But have met a few over the years who would have been better smacked once when young. and what's to stop kids accusing their parents when they punish them in other ways..or threatening to.
I fundamentally disagree with you. My experience is completely at odds with yours and I find the idea of me hitting my son in any way abhorrent. I realise that is conditioned by not wanting any child to experience what I did, but I also realise that there but for good grace go I. I’m glad I never took out my feelings of frustration, anger and fear of losing control on my son physically and I still feel pangs of shame for the times when I couldn’t control my temper enough not to bawl at him. "
Aye, I'd never forgive myself if I hit my daughter.
It's always possible to parent a child without physical violence, and to be honest; I feel that if you smack your child, you've failed them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You're focused on a minority of little shit bags. The vast majority of kids now are well rounded, well educated, decent kids. Open your blinkers.
As for the thing about getting physical with your Dad - this very likely IS the case. What else would you expect when you teach kids violence?! Where do you think the 'didn't do me any harm' shite stems from?
It isn't necessary to hit a child. Ever."
smacking does not teach violence. It's a smack.. not with great force. I used to smack a hand..
It didnt do me any harm.. but I certainly didn't want my parents to smack me for anything. Smacking tends to be a punishment for the under 6s. Can't really remember getting one after that except a slapped face at 14 to which my mortified mother apologised for.. even though personally I think if have got the slap from someone else if I'd said what I did..
I have never resented my parents for the odd smack her and there. I didn't fear my parents but I do and always have respected them.
It will always divide people but should be a parents choice not dictated by the government. Abuse isn't acceptable but big difference from a disciplinarian smack and a good hiding.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"And just to add: As a guy, if your dad smacks/beats you as a kid, there is always going to be that fateful day when you have a fist-fight with your old man. It isn't pretty. I don't think being smacked as a child means you would then get into a fight with your dad.. we are talking about very occasional smacking not regular incidents... I think I can remember a handful of times and only once from my dad..
Not counting a flick of the ear for cheek...
I dont agree with it being lazy parenting just different methods. And to the lasy saying schools behaviour isn't worse... it is a lot worse. And no I dont think its from lack of the Cane more ongoing changes that have changed the way children view authority..
I'm hoping to work in education again soon.. And no end of my teaching friends have told me how hard its getting unless you work in an exceptional school.
I'd happily have my kids doing detentions if needed and always back the school on things.. but mostly schools are not only suffering with badly behaving students but parents that think its okay to behave badly too.. but that's a whole different issue.
The op was about should the UK also ban smacking and no I dont nor will I ever think that they should be able to ban it. "
Well my step dad used to get beaten rotten by his parents, belts, wooden spoons etc, didn't stop him being naughty he told me countless stories of naughty escapades and hefty punishments, he loved them dearly but like he told me once when he was 18 the tables turned and he ended up getting into a big fist fight with his dad |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Hereford |
"You're focused on a minority of little shit bags. The vast majority of kids now are well rounded, well educated, decent kids. Open your blinkers.
As for the thing about getting physical with your Dad - this very likely IS the case. What else would you expect when you teach kids violence?! Where do you think the 'didn't do me any harm' shite stems from?
It isn't necessary to hit a child. Ever. smacking does not teach violence. It's a smack.. not with great force. I used to smack a hand..
It didnt do me any harm.. but I certainly didn't want my parents to smack me for anything. Smacking tends to be a punishment for the under 6s. Can't really remember getting one after that except a slapped face at 14 to which my mortified mother apologised for.. even though personally I think if have got the slap from someone else if I'd said what I did..
I have never resented my parents for the odd smack her and there. I didn't fear my parents but I do and always have respected them.
It will always divide people but should be a parents choice not dictated by the government. Abuse isn't acceptable but big difference from a disciplinarian smack and a good hiding.
"
Of course it does. I was smacked by my dad. I waited till I wads bigger and then punched him in the face. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You used the "didn't do me any harm" line despite everything else said Too funny.
Smacking has long been the discipline of choice by parents that are struggling and parents that are ill educated.
What message is it that you think you give when as a grown adult you hit a small child? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
To all those who say it's ok to smack a child a simple question..
If it's ok to hit you child why when your an adult who hits another adult is it a criminal offence?
I was beaten as a child ...i swore my son would never experience that....
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For what it's worth, it did do me harm.
It also made me determined to never hit my children.
They're 1000% better behaved than I ever was. And better at maths |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Of course it does. I was smacked by my dad. I waited till I wads bigger and then punched him in the face. "
Id question that deeply.. as only time ive had people stating that they had that much anger towards a parent.. was from ongoing abuse not an occasional smack....
As I could never raise a hand to my mum or dad.. And feel/felt no anger if I'd been smacked. In fact being grounded bothe_ed me more. I would Not raise my voice to my parents either.
As to admitting you were waiting till you were big enough to hit him back... that doesn't sound like occasional smack at all..
Had a patient who was seeing me due to a similar incident at a family wedding. He had smacked his dad in the face after being told off at 22 because he was a little d*unk and making a scene.. took a long time but he worked it out and left the anger and resentment at the door.
There are loads of studies on this.. but not read many where the findings were negative. Last one I studied ( was a while ago) but the findings in general were that those questioned held no ill feelings for being smacked by parents or grandparents... obviously there are always exceptions and parents that justify abuse under the guise of discipline.
Asked my youngest earlier. She can't even ever remember getting a smack off me but remembers once from her dad.
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"To all those who say it's ok to smack a child a simple question..
If it's ok to hit you child why when your an adult who hits another adult is it a criminal offence?
I was beaten as a child ...i swore my son would never experience that....
"
I can't understand this argument either or that anyone feels the need to complain about legislation that prevents anyone from hitting a child.
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Hereford |
"For what it's worth, it did do me harm.
It also made me determined to never hit my children.
They're 1000% better behaved than I ever was. And better at maths "
I don't feel like it did me emotional harm, really. I don't resent my dad, I know he tries, and I love him. But the 18 yr old me was different (as you might reasonably expect).
I feel very strongly that violence begets violence, and I'm sure that some parents on here have got a punch coming when their kid gets bigger... |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Hereford |
"
Of course it does. I was smacked by my dad. I waited till I wads bigger and then punched him in the face. Id question that deeply.. as only time ive had people stating that they had that much anger towards a parent.. was from ongoing abuse not an occasional smack....
As I could never raise a hand to my mum or dad.. And feel/felt no anger if I'd been smacked. In fact being grounded bothe_ed me more. I would Not raise my voice to my parents either.
As to admitting you were waiting till you were big enough to hit him back... that doesn't sound like occasional smack at all..
Had a patient who was seeing me due to a similar incident at a family wedding. He had smacked his dad in the face after being told off at 22 because he was a little d*unk and making a scene.. took a long time but he worked it out and left the anger and resentment at the door.
There are loads of studies on this.. but not read many where the findings were negative. Last one I studied ( was a while ago) but the findings in general were that those questioned held no ill feelings for being smacked by parents or grandparents... obviously there are always exceptions and parents that justify abuse under the guise of discipline.
Asked my youngest earlier. She can't even ever remember getting a smack off me but remembers once from her dad.
"
I think he smacked me about 5 times in total. I bear grudges. He does too. Question it all you like, smacking gives the message that violence is acceptable. |
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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
This is another case of nanny state and social engineering at work here. Incidentally, opinion polls show a majority of people are against this "banning".
I think people with common sense can perfectly distinguish between an occasional "smacked bottom" when kids throw a massive fit and regular physical abuse which should rightly be condemned and punished.
I got my bottom smacked a few times was I was.a kid and frankly deserved it. This didn't traumatise me or adversely affect my growing up.
I love my kids to bits but have on rare occasions given a smack on the bottom. I see no issue with this. The state should butt out and leave parenting to parents. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I think he smacked me about 5 times in total. I bear grudges. He does too. Question it all you like, smacking gives the message that violence is acceptable. "
Sorry we will have to agree to disagree... violence has increased in the last decade.. yet majority of those involved will not have been smacked. (They will be the naughty step generation)
If smacking did that then more people would think that.
I was smacked about the same as you and never have I felt that was the message. The message to me was I crossed the line and really disappointed my parents. I am ashamed that i gave them cause to do so.. even more so since being a parent myself and knowing how horrible it makes you feel.
If id ever raised my hand to my parents I would really be ashamed.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Opinion polls also say things like people want hanging brought back.
This is a combination of opinion polls being shit and there being a surprisingly high number of poorly educated fucktards in the population.
As a fully grown adult that hits a small child... how does it make you feel? Like a good parent? Like a tough guy? Would you hit somebody double your size? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Sorry we will have to agree to disagree... violence has increased in the last decade.. yet majority of those involved will not have been smacked. (They will be the naughty step generation)
"
Honestly, what planet?
Where do you get this from?
You think the naughty step generation are on social housing estates?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Opinion polls also say things like people want hanging brought back.
This is a combination of opinion polls being shit and there being a surprisingly high number of poorly educated fucktards in the population.
As a fully grown adult that hits a small child... how does it make you feel? Like a good parent? Like a tough guy? Would you hit somebody double your size?"
its not hitting. Btw I am degree educated ( more than one) and one being behavioural and education psychology.... And I still feel how I do... no you don't feel great but at the time I still defend that it was the right thing to do.
Don't feel great when I have to ground the older ones now... or remove phones etc. But I as any parent do my best... on the whole I have kids that others comment positively about.
I regret many decisions but smacking isn't one of them. |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Hereford |
"
I think he smacked me about 5 times in total. I bear grudges. He does too. Question it all you like, smacking gives the message that violence is acceptable.
Sorry we will have to agree to disagree... violence has increased in the last decade.. yet majority of those involved will not have been smacked. (They will be the naughty step generation)
If smacking did that then more people would think that.
I was smacked about the same as you and never have I felt that was the message. The message to me was I crossed the line and really disappointed my parents. I am ashamed that i gave them cause to do so.. even more so since being a parent myself and knowing how horrible it makes you feel.
If id ever raised my hand to my parents I would really be ashamed.
"
I don't think violence has increased - I just think that violence towards kids was deemed acceptable and not recorded.
I didn't feel great about punching my dad - and I feel even less good about it now; but if you ask the 18 yr old me, he started it.
I'm sure that when your kids hit you, you'll begin to have the same doubts. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Opinion polls also say things like people want hanging brought back.
This is a combination of opinion polls being shit and there being a surprisingly high number of poorly educated fucktards in the population.
As a fully grown adult that hits a small child... how does it make you feel? Like a good parent? Like a tough guy? Would you hit somebody double your size? its not hitting. Btw I am degree educated ( more than one) and one being behavioural and education psychology.... And I still feel how I do... no you don't feel great but at the time I still defend that it was the right thing to do.
Don't feel great when I have to ground the older ones now... or remove phones etc. But I as any parent do my best... on the whole I have kids that others comment positively about.
I regret many decisions but smacking isn't one of them. "
If you genuinely are degree educated in what you claim, you should be ashamed. Not just in yourself but in the education you obtained. It clearly didn't educate you. |
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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
"Opinion polls also say things like people want hanging brought back.
This is a combination of opinion polls being shit and there being a surprisingly high number of poorly educated fucktards in the population.
As a fully grown adult that hits a small child... how does it make you feel? Like a good parent? Like a tough guy? Would you hit somebody double your size?"
Apparently some people are incapable of having a discussion without resorting to insults and pre conceived notions.
So you criticise the technical aspects of poll taking without being an expert, then proceed to label those who disagree with you as fucktards, and finally contextualise a differing opinion as belonging to a bully without knowing one iota about the person?
Where is that good education you profess to teach your children? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Sorry we will have to agree to disagree... violence has increased in the last decade.. yet majority of those involved will not have been smacked. (They will be the naughty step generation)
Honestly, what planet?
Where do you get this from?
You think the naughty step generation are on social housing estates?
"
Living in the real world and interacting with peoole that the violence affects on a regular basis..
I'd like to live where you do if you don't think that their is more violence now.. even a quick look at crime statistics ( don't like to use statistics as a general rule as very easy to manipulate)
But there are more violent children than 30 years ago.. so the argument that it's smacking is null and void as less parents have smacked in each generation as generally it gets frowned upon publicly.
Domestic violence is on the increase as well as general abuse. I'd like to live on a planet where this wasn't the case..
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Opinion polls also say things like people want hanging brought back.
This is a combination of opinion polls being shit and there being a surprisingly high number of poorly educated fucktards in the population.
As a fully grown adult that hits a small child... how does it make you feel? Like a good parent? Like a tough guy? Would you hit somebody double your size?
Apparently some people are incapable of having a discussion without resorting to insults and pre conceived notions.
So you criticise the technical aspects of poll taking without being an expert, then proceed to label those who disagree with you as fucktards, and finally contextualise a differing opinion as belonging to a bully without knowing one iota about the person?
Where is that good education you profess to teach your children?"
People are not fucktards because they disagree with me. They are fucktards because they believe violence is an acceptable method of dealing with small children's behaviour.
I apologise if my flowery language has upset you, however I see good evidence that there are a surprisingly large number of stupid people in the population and it is for this reason that we don't allow a referendum for every popular whim. |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Hereford |
"
Sorry we will have to agree to disagree... violence has increased in the last decade.. yet majority of those involved will not have been smacked. (They will be the naughty step generation)
Honestly, what planet?
Where do you get this from?
You think the naughty step generation are on social housing estates?
Living in the real world and interacting with peoole that the violence affects on a regular basis..
I'd like to live where you do if you don't think that their is more violence now.. even a quick look at crime statistics ( don't like to use statistics as a general rule as very easy to manipulate)
But there are more violent children than 30 years ago.. so the argument that it's smacking is null and void as less parents have smacked in each generation as generally it gets frowned upon publicly.
Domestic violence is on the increase as well as general abuse. I'd like to live on a planet where this wasn't the case..
"
How well do you think these things were recorded 30 yuears ago? I suspect the defenition of "violent" kids has changed somewhat. I cant ever remember the police being involved (and therefore recording the stastistic) when I was a kid and two kids haf a scrap. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Sorry we will have to agree to disagree... violence has increased in the last decade.. yet majority of those involved will not have been smacked. (They will be the naughty step generation)
Honestly, what planet?
Where do you get this from?
You think the naughty step generation are on social housing estates?
Living in the real world and interacting with peoole that the violence affects on a regular basis..
I'd like to live where you do if you don't think that their is more violence now.. even a quick look at crime statistics ( don't like to use statistics as a general rule as very easy to manipulate)
But there are more violent children than 30 years ago.. so the argument that it's smacking is null and void as less parents have smacked in each generation as generally it gets frowned upon publicly.
Domestic violence is on the increase as well as general abuse. I'd like to live on a planet where this wasn't the case..
"
Is what you actually mean that you live in a place where you see such things, but you don't get out much?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Opinion polls also say things like people want hanging brought back.
This is a combination of opinion polls being shit and there being a surprisingly high number of poorly educated fucktards in the population.
As a fully grown adult that hits a small child... how does it make you feel? Like a good parent? Like a tough guy? Would you hit somebody double your size? its not hitting. Btw I am degree educated ( more than one) and one being behavioural and education psychology.... And I still feel how I do... no you don't feel great but at the time I still defend that it was the right thing to do.
Don't feel great when I have to ground the older ones now... or remove phones etc. But I as any parent do my best... on the whole I have kids that others comment positively about.
I regret many decisions but smacking isn't one of them.
If you genuinely are degree educated in what you claim, you should be ashamed. Not just in yourself but in the education you obtained. It clearly didn't educate you."
nope proud of myself and my children.
I'm capable of having a different opinion without resulting to insults. As I say my kids are to old for smacking to be an issue now.. but I won't change my views or apologise because I believe a smack is sometimes the right course of action. I would never hit or abuse a child. A smack is not that in my view either when I got one.
It is not violence in my view either..its same as any other mother in nature. I love my kids and keep them safe. |
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By *lyreelMan
over a year ago
King's lynn |
So as an adult you say "I am not doing that" to your employer, he smacks you, maybe uses a ruler or a belt, would you find this acceptable?
I was heavily beaten as a child, why? Because my mother was a cunt, I despise her for her weakness, I hate her for being weak and taking her problems in life out on me.
I have had 4 children, not once have I lifted my hand to them, as an adult you should be the adult, you should not have to resort to violence toward someone who is tiny, vulnerable and basically is looking for love and affection from its parents.
If you hit your " loved " kids and can look in the mirror and still feel good about yourself then you need help or indeed help in how to rear kids.
There are plenty ways in which to get kids to behave, get some self help books, use your intelligence, not the back of your hand.
I am no pacifist, I have boxed, martial arts are of interest to me and I will take no shit from any adult who gets in my face, but if it's a child then I will never ever raise my hand to it.
It repulses me and those who do it are the weak. |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Hereford |
"So as an adult you say "I am not doing that" to your employer, he smacks you, maybe uses a ruler or a belt, would you find this acceptable?
I was heavily beaten as a child, why? Because my mother was a cunt, I despise her for her weakness, I hate her for being weak and taking her problems in life out on me.
I have had 4 children, not once have I lifted my hand to them, as an adult you should be the adult, you should not have to resort to violence toward someone who is tiny, vulnerable and basically is looking for love and affection from its parents.
If you hit your " loved " kids and can look in the mirror and still feel good about yourself then you need help or indeed help in how to rear kids.
There are plenty ways in which to get kids to behave, get some self help books, use your intelligence, not the back of your hand.
I am no pacifist, I have boxed, martial arts are of interest to me and I will take no shit from any adult who gets in my face, but if it's a child then I will never ever raise my hand to it.
It repulses me and those who do it are the weak. "
I hear ya. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Is what you actually mean that you live in a place where you see such things, but you don't get out much?
"
Not at all. I get out a lot but don't need to be petty to put a point across. You don't have to agree but I respect your view is different to mine.
I am a parent of 6. Grandmother of 3.. work 2 jobs and study.. getting out less would be great
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Opinion polls also say things like people want hanging brought back.
This is a combination of opinion polls being shit and there being a surprisingly high number of poorly educated fucktards in the population.
As a fully grown adult that hits a small child... how does it make you feel? Like a good parent? Like a tough guy? Would you hit somebody double your size?
Apparently some people are incapable of having a discussion without resorting to insults and pre conceived notions.
So you criticise the technical aspects of poll taking without being an expert, then proceed to label those who disagree with you as fucktards, and finally contextualise a differing opinion as belonging to a bully without knowing one iota about the person?
Where is that good education you profess to teach your children?"
|
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Hereford |
"Opinion polls also say things like people want hanging brought back.
This is a combination of opinion polls being shit and there being a surprisingly high number of poorly educated fucktards in the population.
As a fully grown adult that hits a small child... how does it make you feel? Like a good parent? Like a tough guy? Would you hit somebody double your size?
Apparently some people are incapable of having a discussion without resorting to insults and pre conceived notions.
So you criticise the technical aspects of poll taking without being an expert, then proceed to label those who disagree with you as fucktards, and finally contextualise a differing opinion as belonging to a bully without knowing one iota about the person?
Where is that good education you profess to teach your children? "
You reap what you sow.
You seem very proud of the fact that you have been violent towards your children. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I was smacked and have smacked.... Didn't turn out weird, don't hate my parents, my kids don't hate me, none of us have any problems, my parents weren't Hitler or alcoholics, it wasn't abuse, didn't lead to punching each other, nobody has mentalness.
Just a plain old smack on the arse for being naughty, everybody survived it without major trauma  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Is what you actually mean that you live in a place where you see such things, but you don't get out much?
Not at all. I get out a lot but don't need to be petty to put a point across. You don't have to agree but I respect your view is different to mine.
I am a parent of 6. Grandmother of 3.. work 2 jobs and study.. getting out less would be great
"
That is pretty much as I guessed.
You're not so unpetty as to assume I don't live in the 'real world' and that my opinions are based on nothing more than a comfortable existence from a nice armchair.
I can understand that you wouldn't want to accept the idea that hitting g your children wasn't necessary.
Bit the sooner people are forced to accept that in fact they shouldn't be doing so, the better.
Well done Scotland (again!) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I was smacked and have smacked.... Didn't turn out weird, don't hate my parents, my kids don't hate me, none of us have any problems, my parents weren't Hitler or alcoholics, it wasn't abuse, didn't lead to punching each other, nobody has mentalness.
Just a plain old smack on the arse for being naughty, everybody survived it without major trauma "
see ive gone all around the houses and you have said it perfectly |
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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
"Opinion polls also say things like people want hanging brought back.
This is a combination of opinion polls being shit and there being a surprisingly high number of poorly educated fucktards in the population.
As a fully grown adult that hits a small child... how does it make you feel? Like a good parent? Like a tough guy? Would you hit somebody double your size?
Apparently some people are incapable of having a discussion without resorting to insults and pre conceived notions.
So you criticise the technical aspects of poll taking without being an expert, then proceed to label those who disagree with you as fucktards, and finally contextualise a differing opinion as belonging to a bully without knowing one iota about the person?
Where is that good education you profess to teach your children?
People are not fucktards because they disagree with me. They are fucktards because they believe violence is an acceptable method of dealing with small children's behaviour.
I apologise if my flowery language has upset you, however I see good evidence that there are a surprisingly large number of stupid people in the population and it is for this reason that we don't allow a referendum for every popular whim."
Again, you are basically stating that people that don't agree with you are stupid people whose opinion doesn't count.
An occasional smack on the bottom in extreme circumstances is a far cry from regular beating of a child which I have seen and denounced in the past.
By your logic, there are more actions that can be interpreted as violence as well. Should the government ban parents from yelling at their kids when warranted as well? Someone could interpret that as violence directed at a child that could be potentially damaging. See the slippery slope here?
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Is what you actually mean that you live in a place where you see such things, but you don't get out much?
Not at all. I get out a lot but don't need to be petty to put a point across. You don't have to agree but I respect your view is different to mine.
I am a parent of 6. Grandmother of 3.. work 2 jobs and study.. getting out less would be great
That is pretty much as I guessed.
You're not so unpetty as to assume I don't live in the 'real world' and that my opinions are based on nothing more than a comfortable existence from a nice armchair.
I can understand that you wouldn't want to accept the idea that hitting g your children wasn't necessary.
Bit the sooner people are forced to accept that in fact they shouldn't be doing so, the better.
Well done Scotland (again!)"
lol I dont need to accept that it was or wasn't necessary.. they are my children. Who I bring up and punish or dont as I see fit...
. And what had you pretty much guessed? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Opinion polls also say things like people want hanging brought back.
This is a combination of opinion polls being shit and there being a surprisingly high number of poorly educated fucktards in the population.
As a fully grown adult that hits a small child... how does it make you feel? Like a good parent? Like a tough guy? Would you hit somebody double your size?
Apparently some people are incapable of having a discussion without resorting to insults and pre conceived notions.
So you criticise the technical aspects of poll taking without being an expert, then proceed to label those who disagree with you as fucktards, and finally contextualise a differing opinion as belonging to a bully without knowing one iota about the person?
Where is that good education you profess to teach your children?
People are not fucktards because they disagree with me. They are fucktards because they believe violence is an acceptable method of dealing with small children's behaviour.
I apologise if my flowery language has upset you, however I see good evidence that there are a surprisingly large number of stupid people in the population and it is for this reason that we don't allow a referendum for every popular whim.
Again, you are basically stating that people that don't agree with you are stupid people whose opinion doesn't count.
An occasional smack on the bottom in extreme circumstances is a far cry from regular beating of a child which I have seen and denounced in the past.
By your logic, there are more actions that can be interpreted as violence as well. Should the government ban parents from yelling at their kids when warranted as well? Someone could interpret that as violence directed at a child that could be potentially damaging. See the slippery slope here?
"
The bit where you accuse me of insulting people before going in to do likewise it a bit boring.
The bit where you attempt to take the argument I've made (it's all in writing above) and then claim I was arguing that children should never be told off... is also boring.
My logic is clear. It is not necessary to use physical violence against a child in order to bring them up well. Many, many fortunate children are testament to this. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I've been following similar threads on other forums and it is a very emotive subject but on the whole most seem to think it should be the parents choice.. even many that are anti smack themselves agreed it was there choice.
Just asked it on my fb of the 38 people that answe_ed.. 2 have never smacked.. all were smacked/slippe_ed or clipped around the ear by parents or relatives.. my friends vary in demographics from lawyers to shelf fillers and many inbetween. There is little correlation between educational levels and choosing to smack or not. In fact the two none smacking friends have the lowest education.
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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
"Opinion polls also say things like people want hanging brought back.
This is a combination of opinion polls being shit and there being a surprisingly high number of poorly educated fucktards in the population.
As a fully grown adult that hits a small child... how does it make you feel? Like a good parent? Like a tough guy? Would you hit somebody double your size?
Apparently some people are incapable of having a discussion without resorting to insults and pre conceived notions.
So you criticise the technical aspects of poll taking without being an expert, then proceed to label those who disagree with you as fucktards, and finally contextualise a differing opinion as belonging to a bully without knowing one iota about the person?
Where is that good education you profess to teach your children?
People are not fucktards because they disagree with me. They are fucktards because they believe violence is an acceptable method of dealing with small children's behaviour.
I apologise if my flowery language has upset you, however I see good evidence that there are a surprisingly large number of stupid people in the population and it is for this reason that we don't allow a referendum for every popular whim.
Again, you are basically stating that people that don't agree with you are stupid people whose opinion doesn't count.
An occasional smack on the bottom in extreme circumstances is a far cry from regular beating of a child which I have seen and denounced in the past.
By your logic, there are more actions that can be interpreted as violence as well. Should the government ban parents from yelling at their kids when warranted as well? Someone could interpret that as violence directed at a child that could be potentially damaging. See the slippery slope here?
The bit where you accuse me of insulting people before going in to do likewise it a bit boring.
The bit where you attempt to take the argument I've made (it's all in writing above) and then claim I was arguing that children should never be told off... is also boring.
My logic is clear. It is not necessary to use physical violence against a child in order to bring them up well. Many, many fortunate children are testament to this."
I'm not accusing you of anything. You clearly insulted people in your posts. Unless you don't consider fucktards insulting.
Violence can be more than physical and I was drawing a parallel.
I'm sorry if being smacked as a child affected you greatly. That doesn't give you the right to generalise your experience to every child, everywhere.
We can agree to disagree as far as i'm concerned. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Opinion polls also say things like people want hanging brought back.
This is a combination of opinion polls being shit and there being a surprisingly high number of poorly educated fucktards in the population.
As a fully grown adult that hits a small child... how does it make you feel? Like a good parent? Like a tough guy? Would you hit somebody double your size?
Apparently some people are incapable of having a discussion without resorting to insults and pre conceived notions.
So you criticise the technical aspects of poll taking without being an expert, then proceed to label those who disagree with you as fucktards, and finally contextualise a differing opinion as belonging to a bully without knowing one iota about the person?
Where is that good education you profess to teach your children?
People are not fucktards because they disagree with me. They are fucktards because they believe violence is an acceptable method of dealing with small children's behaviour.
I apologise if my flowery language has upset you, however I see good evidence that there are a surprisingly large number of stupid people in the population and it is for this reason that we don't allow a referendum for every popular whim.
Again, you are basically stating that people that don't agree with you are stupid people whose opinion doesn't count.
An occasional smack on the bottom in extreme circumstances is a far cry from regular beating of a child which I have seen and denounced in the past.
By your logic, there are more actions that can be interpreted as violence as well. Should the government ban parents from yelling at their kids when warranted as well? Someone could interpret that as violence directed at a child that could be potentially damaging. See the slippery slope here?
"
Yelling at my son was because I’d lost control of my emotions not because his actions warranted it, but simply I didn’t possess the emotional competence to express what I needed to without yelling, nor did I, in that moment, have the resources to choose a more effective disciplinary strategy. The problem was my lack of self awareness, yelling was not effective and was potentially damaging. Has it had a negative effect on my son, I don’t know yet but my guess is it has had an effect. He may feel able to tell me about it when he’s older but right now I wish I had been more emotionally intelligent. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To all those who say it's ok to smack a child a simple question..
If it's ok to hit you child why when your an adult who hits another adult is it a criminal offence?
I was beaten as a child ...i swore my son would never experience that....
I can't understand this argument either or that anyone feels the need to complain about legislation that prevents anyone from hitting a child.
"
Perhaps you have misread.
My point was simple..
No child should ever be beaten..smacked if you prefer. If they are it's no different to an adult assaulting another adult
Apologies if that wasn't clear to you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To all those who say it's ok to smack a child a simple question..
If it's ok to hit you child why when your an adult who hits another adult is it a criminal offence?
I was beaten as a child ...i swore my son would never experience that....
I can't understand this argument either or that anyone feels the need to complain about legislation that prevents anyone from hitting a child.
Perhaps you have misread.
My point was simple..
No child should ever be beaten..smacked if you prefer. If they are it's no different to an adult assaulting another adult
Apologies if that wasn't clear to you."
do you not see a difference between a smack and a beating then? |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Hereford |
"To all those who say it's ok to smack a child a simple question..
If it's ok to hit you child why when your an adult who hits another adult is it a criminal offence?
I was beaten as a child ...i swore my son would never experience that....
I can't understand this argument either or that anyone feels the need to complain about legislation that prevents anyone from hitting a child.
Perhaps you have misread.
My point was simple..
No child should ever be beaten..smacked if you prefer. If they are it's no different to an adult assaulting another adult
Apologies if that wasn't clear to you. do you not see a difference between a smack and a beating then? "
Pretty much the same. I'm sure if I gave you an open handed smack, you could have me up for ABH.
But let us not forget, you have an agenda. You seem to like hitting children. Apparently it's somehow good for them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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'do you not see a difference between a smack and a beating then?'
i see a very clear difference, in the level of violence,obviously!...what i don't see is how either are acceptable.
In an ideal world, we should not need government legislation to force us to behave like civilised human beings...but it's not an ideal world, and if takes legislation to force people to behave decently towards each other , then so be it. We apparently need legislation to spell out to people they cannot discriminate, cannot assault, cannot rob...i see no difference with this...if people can't work that out for themselves, then that's just tough shit! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Pretty much the same. I'm sure if I gave you an open handed smack, you could have me up for ABH.
But let us not forget, you have an agenda. You seem to like hitting children. Apparently it's somehow good for them. "
Stop putting words Into other people's mouths. A smack is no more than a tap. If someone open hand slapped someone that is more than a tap.
And I think everyone ( myself included) who has said they have smacked has said its not something that they enjoy. But let's not let whats actually been said get in the way of a twist in whats been said.
I've never belted.. or hit my children. I have smacked and to me there is a bloody big difference. Oh and to social services too.. try being a young mum in care with a small child with social services watching every move... funny they saw a huge difference too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To all those who say it's ok to smack a child a simple question..
If it's ok to hit you child why when your an adult who hits another adult is it a criminal offence?
I was beaten as a child ...i swore my son would never experience that....
I can't understand this argument either or that anyone feels the need to complain about legislation that prevents anyone from hitting a child.
Perhaps you have misread.
My point was simple..
No child should ever be beaten..smacked if you prefer. If they are it's no different to an adult assaulting another adult
Apologies if that wasn't clear to you. do you not see a difference between a smack and a beating then? "
The only difference is one of degree. Violence against a child can no more be justified than violence against an adult
It is still an act of violence usually a sign of a loss of control by the perpetrator and a demonstration of failure to act as a responsible loving parent.
Like others it is my view and you can disagree if you wish. But if we .cannot find a better way of interacting with our children than to beat smack otherwise control teach and protect our children we fail them and inflict damage on them which affects their lives in ways we may never know.
To beat a child is to fail as a parent. There is always a better way |
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To me there is nothing wrong with smacking a naughty child, the issue lies with where and how you smack a child.
Couple of smacks on the legs, bum, arms, to me is acceptable with an open hand, head and other such areas are not, nor is beating the crap out of the kid right.
My views are based on my upbringing, I got smack when I was being a little shit, it did make me think twice about doing it again. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You used the "didn't do me any harm" line despite everything else said Too funny.
Smacking has long been the discipline of choice by parents that are struggling and parents that are ill educated.
What message is it that you think you give when as a grown adult you hit a small child?"
"Smacking has long been the discipline of choice by parents that are struggling and parents that are ill educated"
What a load of bollocks! |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Hereford |
"
Pretty much the same. I'm sure if I gave you an open handed smack, you could have me up for ABH.
But let us not forget, you have an agenda. You seem to like hitting children. Apparently it's somehow good for them.
Stop putting words Into other people's mouths. A smack is no more than a tap. If someone open hand slapped someone that is more than a tap.
And I think everyone ( myself included) who has said they have smacked has said its not something that they enjoy. But let's not let whats actually been said get in the way of a twist in whats been said.
I've never belted.. or hit my children. I have smacked and to me there is a bloody big difference. Oh and to social services too.. try being a young mum in care with a small child with social services watching every move... funny they saw a huge difference too. "
You seem to be clutching at straws at this point.
Have ypou been in trouble with social services then?
I'm not really surprised. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To all those who say it's ok to smack a child a simple question..
If it's ok to hit you child why when your an adult who hits another adult is it a criminal offence?
I was beaten as a child ...i swore my son would never experience that....
I can't understand this argument either or that anyone feels the need to complain about legislation that prevents anyone from hitting a child.
Perhaps you have misread.
My point was simple..
No child should ever be beaten..smacked if you prefer. If they are it's no different to an adult assaulting another adult
Apologies if that wasn't clear to you. do you not see a difference between a smack and a beating then?
The only difference is one of degree. Violence against a child can no more be justified than violence against an adult
It is still an act of violence usually a sign of a loss of control by the perpetrator and a demonstration of failure to act as a responsible loving parent.
Like others it is my view and you can disagree if you wish. But if we .cannot find a better way of interacting with our children than to beat smack otherwise control teach and protect our children we fail them and inflict damage on them which affects their lives in ways we may never know.
To beat a child is to fail as a parent. There is always a better way "
I will have to disagree as I have smacked because I dont wish to fail them and would never do so if I was out of control as a out of control moment.
To be fair there is a huge gap between how I smacked and my parents. When I was it always left a mark. My mum's slipper bloody hurt but it didn't have a lasting impression.
I was told that using two fingers to smack was enough... And that never to do so if I was angry.
I have shouted and feel worse about that as it was in a moment of lost control.. And that to me is worse and from talking to my older children mum shouting seems to have left a worse impression. I've spoken to another of my kids this evening and again she cant think of any time she remembers me smacking her... And she reminded me of a time I shouted and apparently seeing mum so cross made her sca_ed and feel bad.
We are all allowed to differ in opinions but it doesn't make anyone better or worse just different |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Pretty much the same. I'm sure if I gave you an open handed smack, you could have me up for ABH.
But let us not forget, you have an agenda. You seem to like hitting children. Apparently it's somehow good for them.
Stop putting words Into other people's mouths. A smack is no more than a tap. If someone open hand slapped someone that is more than a tap.
And I think everyone ( myself included) who has said they have smacked has said its not something that they enjoy. But let's not let whats actually been said get in the way of a twist in whats been said.
I've never belted.. or hit my children. I have smacked and to me there is a bloody big difference. Oh and to social services too.. try being a young mum in care with a small child with social services watching every move... funny they saw a huge difference too.
You seem to be clutching at straws at this point.
Have ypou been in trouble with social services then?
I'm not really surprised. "
judgemental much. No I was an a grade student. People do go into care for other reasons you know. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i don't think it matters if the vast majority of parents smacking children do it 'lightly', 'harmlessly', or whatever you choose to call it, and it causes no harm...it's irrelevant to me. We live in country where parents beat about 3 children to death a week. If even a tiny minority cause harm, then yes, its needs to be legislated against. Unfortunately if people can't police themselves over this issue, then yes, the government has to step and do it. And if parents feel they don't know alternative ways to deal with their children, they will just have to learn them, hitting cannot be left as an option. |
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"Can imagine frustrated parent threatening their kids with "anymore of that and I,ll take you to Carlisle". "
Or I'll send you to live with Nicola Sturgeon for a week, such an unimaginably cruel punishment |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think its a perfect idea. I hated my dad for hitting me. Made me worse in behaviour. Ive never hit my child in my life and hes the most well behaved child i could have wished for. Only a bully could hurt an innocent human being |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The point that is curiously igno_ed is that it is not necessary to smack a child to discipline them, to teach them right from wrong or anything else.
This is unarguable fact. There are examples of children brought up very well without needing to be smacked, everywhere.
Why then, do you choose to still smack a child?
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