FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Manners or no manners that's the queztion
Manners or no manners that's the queztion
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Ok so only been on here a few months and had a few meets so just the question above. I grew up in a world were you respected people especially women, that's great most of you say. So when meeting couples either I or we find ourselves having to support a person male or female in a process where they seemed that they are being pushed into moving their boundaries by their partners, sometimes their nervousness is really apparent about accepting something either physically or mentally that it would seem they didn't want. Now the questiom do I or we do the right thing, namely respect that persons boundaries, or go along with pushing them into something they seem that they don't want. I know even couples engaged in bdsm have some way of communicating acceptance or non acceptance of a situation, some couple have things they reserve just for their partner, in order to see seperatness from swinging meet and their primary relationship. Are we/me right to back off and respect the persons boundaries, to the demise of the meet, or should we push the nervous person to accept sometging they seem to not wamt. Is this part of the titillation of meets or somethimh you feel should not be entertained.
To be or not to be.
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Respect for others is an absolute must at all times in life.
If engaging with others where it seems there may be an imbalance towards wanting or not wanting something, then I would step back and potentially away from them. I would not be willing to further a potentially abusive partner coercing someone to do something that they didn't want to. They may be using the outsiders for social pressure against their partner.
I would probably state something that I would hope is supportive to both of them but I would let them deal with this in their own privacy and space.
Pushing boundaries can sound so light and fun but it could be reflective of serious harm against someone.
If you find this happens repeatedly, look at your selection criteria. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why on earth would you want to do something that the person clearly doesn't want to do?"
Exactly. The fact the OP even asked this question is extremely concerning
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"Suggest watching the cup of tea sexual consent video on YouTube..
That may clear up the misunderstanding..
Excellent analogy "
I would then suggest watching the tea slut video after.. But perhaps this isn't the correct forum for that suggestion, so best I not suggest it.. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Ok I have a real respect and regard for safety and abusive behaviour, even be it mild abuse, so its clear that the conscientious opinion is what I would have and do follow. It cuts down the possible meets being sucessful, but makes me/us more comfortable and shows there is a reasonable following to suggest that real lifestyle choice people do give the people they are interacting with a choice. Maybe we have been unlucky. Loves and hugs to all the repliers.   |
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