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What do you expect?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I was talking with a friend who slept with a girl who despite telling him beforehand about her amazing oral skills didn't actually go down on him. He now feels a bit hard fine by as he more than gave his fair share.
Are there certain things youd expect on a meet? Do you discuss what will or wont happen beforehand?
If someone isn't reciprocating fairly would you mention it? |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
I expect nothing - always find it's best that way, whether that be about a meet or just interaction on here.
As for a meet I usually discuss likes/dislikes beforehand - more to understand any specific no no's than anything - but am hesitant to go into more detail ahead of time as I'd much rather a fluid meet that just flows naturally than have a menu of things that have to be done. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I expect nothing - always find it's best that way, whether that be about a meet or just interaction on here.
As for a meet I usually discuss likes/dislikes beforehand - more to understand any specific no no's than anything - but am hesitant to go into more detail ahead of time as I'd much rather a fluid meet that just flows naturally than have a menu of things that have to be done."
Yeah I'm the same with the actual "what will happen" on a meet. I don't want it to feel like I'm just acting out a scene already written.
I guess there are just basics is assume would happen. Like kissing, I know some people choose not to but I'd want to know in advance if that was the case, because a meet without kissing isn't something id enjoy. |
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We wouldnt expect anything ,but would hope that they would be into mutual pleasure.
If we met a couple who were more into the taking than giving,we wouldnt want to meet again and probably wouldnt verify them.Or would just write the basics ie turned up .
Miss |
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By *eeBee67Man
over a year ago
Masked and Distant |
Would expect communication before and during.
For exampke; I dont say "I am amazing at oral" as I would expect some direction, what one person likes another doesnt. And I would expect the communication to be 2 way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When I'm meeting someone I expect at the very least we will be able to communicate at least as well as we do via messaging otherwise I've got it all wrong. I tend not to discuss in too much detail what we will do on the meet, as part of the excitement about meeting new people is not really knowing what exactly to expect. The only thing I expect in terms of sex, is that they respect any hard limits I may have. Other than that, if I want to try something on a meet or want them to do something, I'm comfortable enough with that person to be able to communicate that. Otherwise I wouldn't be meeting them. |
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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
"When I'm meeting someone I expect at the very least we will be able to communicate at least as well as we do via messaging otherwise I've got it all wrong. I tend not to discuss in too much detail what we will do on the meet, as part of the excitement about meeting new people is not really knowing what exactly to expect. The only thing I expect in terms of sex, is that they respect any hard limits I may have. Other than that, if I want to try something on a meet or want them to do something, I'm comfortable enough with that person to be able to communicate that. Otherwise I wouldn't be meeting them. "
Eloquently stated. Exactly my thoughts  |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"When I'm meeting someone I expect at the very least we will be able to communicate at least as well as we do via messaging otherwise I've got it all wrong. I tend not to discuss in too much detail what we will do on the meet, as part of the excitement about meeting new people is not really knowing what exactly to expect. The only thing I expect in terms of sex, is that they respect any hard limits I may have. Other than that, if I want to try something on a meet or want them to do something, I'm comfortable enough with that person to be able to communicate that. Otherwise I wouldn't be meeting them. "
Said what I was trying to say only so much better  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I expect nothing and promise nothing, I prefer things to happen naturally. There is nothing worse than having a meet scripted, so much better if it just flows! |
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By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago
Hull |
I prefer to meet guys that I’ve already chatted to and got to know a bit and then I feel more comfortable mentioning things we like and dislike. I too prefer to go with the feeling rather than tick off a list of things to do so don’t expect anything apart from avoiding things we don’t like. I have tried meets with people I have only briefly chatted with and the sex has been rubbish if it even got that far |
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Some people like scripted meets eg role play.
I think if you meet someone who isn't doing what you want you're much better telling them than moaning to your friend afterwards.
We say what we don't want on our profile and always ask in the first few messages if prospective meets are happy with those restrictions, only one person has said no (we think he was the only one brave enough to admit he hadn't read it  ). We also say what we do want
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some people like scripted meets eg role play.
I think if you meet someone who isn't doing what you want you're much better telling them than moaning to your friend afterwards.
We say what we don't want on our profile and always ask in the first few messages if prospective meets are happy with those restrictions, only one person has said no (we think he was the only one brave enough to admit he hadn't read it ). We also say what we do want
"
Yeah I agree with this.
If I expected something to happen I would just say if that is the case, I don't see any problem being open and honest about what you want from something as long as it is okay with others. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ooh, good question. I know I've had expectations, of what I would like and like for them.
And when it didn't happen (mainly because my plans always turn into going with the flow, and improvising can be so much more fun) I've never felt hard done by. It gives much more reason to look forward to getting together again, if that's possible.  |
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"Some people like scripted meets eg role play.
I think if you meet someone who isn't doing what you want you're much better telling them than moaning to your friend afterwards.
We say what we don't want on our profile and always ask in the first few messages if prospective meets are happy with those restrictions, only one person has said no (we think he was the only one brave enough to admit he hadn't read it ). We also say what we do want
Yeah I agree with this.
If I expected something to happen I would just say if that is the case, I don't see any problem being open and honest about what you want from something as long as it is okay with others. "
Considering we're meeting virtual strangers for sex it seems odd that we wouldn't. Between ourselves we don't discuss whats going to happen every time we have sex because we've been together 37 years and know the stuff we like (although we do have an ongoing discussion)but with people we've known 37 minutes or days some sort of outline plan is needed surely. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" I had a meet recently where after performing oral on him we were kissing and I just said "your turn, down you go' and he obliged. "
Love when a woman 'tells you' to do that, makes me rock hard.
Of course I normally don't get asked as Im the type who usually does it without prompt. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If a social, id expect nothing but good conversation, and that is all.
I'm pretty sure the op wasn't referring to a social meet "
Still, I expect at least 2 cups of caffeine, anything less and I'm hitting the block button asap. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some people like scripted meets eg role play.
I think if you meet someone who isn't doing what you want you're much better telling them than moaning to your friend afterwards.
We say what we don't want on our profile and always ask in the first few messages if prospective meets are happy with those restrictions, only one person has said no (we think he was the only one brave enough to admit he hadn't read it ). We also say what we do want
Yeah I agree with this.
If I expected something to happen I would just say if that is the case, I don't see any problem being open and honest about what you want from something as long as it is okay with others.
Considering we're meeting virtual strangers for sex it seems odd that we wouldn't. Between ourselves we don't discuss whats going to happen every time we have sex because we've been together 37 years and know the stuff we like (although we do have an ongoing discussion)but with people we've known 37 minutes or days some sort of outline plan is needed surely."
Yeah I know what you mean. As the OP said, if someone makes a point in conversation about particular skills generally if you're interested in said being you want them to display that to you surely if they care enough.
I'd have said more of a strategy than plan, as you tend to change things to suit but have a general idea on how to get there and what to utilise haha. |
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"Some people like scripted meets eg role play.
I think if you meet someone who isn't doing what you want you're much better telling them than moaning to your friend afterwards.
We say what we don't want on our profile and always ask in the first few messages if prospective meets are happy with those restrictions, only one person has said no (we think he was the only one brave enough to admit he hadn't read it ). We also say what we do want
Yeah I agree with this.
If I expected something to happen I would just say if that is the case, I don't see any problem being open and honest about what you want from something as long as it is okay with others.
Considering we're meeting virtual strangers for sex it seems odd that we wouldn't. Between ourselves we don't discuss whats going to happen every time we have sex because we've been together 37 years and know the stuff we like (although we do have an ongoing discussion)but with people we've known 37 minutes or days some sort of outline plan is needed surely.
Yeah I know what you mean. As the OP said, if someone makes a point in conversation about particular skills generally if you're interested in said being you want them to display that to you surely if they care enough.
I'd have said more of a strategy than plan, as you tend to change things to suit but have a general idea on how to get there and what to utilise haha."
Yep but I don't understand why he just didn't say. It's like me phoning a takeaway for a certain dish, looking in the container when I get there to pick it up, discovering its not what was discussed, then leaving the shop and complaining to a friend rather than just asking the person in the shop to give me what was discussed.
Anyway from what I can gather she just claimed to have great oral skills, maybe she meant she talked a lot |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If a social, id expect nothing but good conversation, and that is all.
I'm pretty sure the op wasn't referring to a social meet "
I know but I won’t go into detail for a sex meet, there’s enough wank fodder on the internet already  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you expect something you'll only end up being disappointed 
An open mind and enjoying the experience is what it's all about.  "
Personally I do have my expectations not just in sex though and I will try to make them happen it gives me drive. Yes, you will have dissapointment but it's how you move on from them because life's full of them.
That saying I'm open minded anyway so I rarely seem disappointed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some people like scripted meets eg role play.
I think if you meet someone who isn't doing what you want you're much better telling them than moaning to your friend afterwards.
We say what we don't want on our profile and always ask in the first few messages if prospective meets are happy with those restrictions, only one person has said no (we think he was the only one brave enough to admit he hadn't read it ). We also say what we do want
Yeah I agree with this.
If I expected something to happen I would just say if that is the case, I don't see any problem being open and honest about what you want from something as long as it is okay with others.
Considering we're meeting virtual strangers for sex it seems odd that we wouldn't. Between ourselves we don't discuss whats going to happen every time we have sex because we've been together 37 years and know the stuff we like (although we do have an ongoing discussion)but with people we've known 37 minutes or days some sort of outline plan is needed surely.
Yeah I know what you mean. As the OP said, if someone makes a point in conversation about particular skills generally if you're interested in said being you want them to display that to you surely if they care enough.
I'd have said more of a strategy than plan, as you tend to change things to suit but have a general idea on how to get there and what to utilise haha.
Yep but I don't understand why he just didn't say. It's like me phoning a takeaway for a certain dish, looking in the container when I get there to pick it up, discovering its not what was discussed, then leaving the shop and complaining to a friend rather than just asking the person in the shop to give me what was discussed.
Anyway from what I can gather she just claimed to have great oral skills, maybe she meant she talked a lot "
I'm pretty sure that example is a trait found in many brits, I think the stiff upper lip is very present in our society. People do rather go and moan about something with others than face up to something so to avoid confrontation.
haha you could be right. |
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