Hmmmmmm
Let's see..personally speaking..
Nearly 100 messages today.
Most are one liners, a lot are over 100+miles away, a lot have cock shot profile pics.
I'm not looking to meet anyone new, clearly stated on my profile.
To reply to each would take me, what an hour?
Then there's the return message, trying to change my mind, or the odd abusive one.
No thanks, as clearly stated in site rules, no reply, no intrest
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"Why don't ppl just say sorry not interested not my type
No reply is ignorant"
I imagine they think if they reply it opens them up to you trying to convince them why they should be interested in you
For me as long as they delete the message you sent them then at least you can see they are not interested even if it's not communicated in the most direct way |
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From the FAQ section of the site, in answer to your question...
"It's not rude not to reply.
Some ladies and couples get hundreds of messages a day so it simply isn't possible for them to reply to everyone. If you don't get a response, you should assume they aren't interested. If you're getting a lot of "no-replies" then you should consider your profile and the messages you send. Are they giving the right message? Are you standing out from the thousands of other guys on here?" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why don't ppl just say sorry not interested not my type
No reply is ignorant"
Because a lot of people don't know how to let people down gently, or have been met with desperation or offense when they've done so.
Also, some people get too much attention to reply to everyone, and if your message didn't stand out, it will likely get deleted without being read. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just can't be arsed 
Also it takes times I don't have, quite often if I do say thanks but no thanks then the person either attempts to convince me otherwise or engage in conversation as to why they're not.
Its generally understood and is also stated in the FAQs that a no reply is a thanks but no thanks. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why don't ppl just read profiles before messaging.
Not reading profiles is ignorant"
I completely agree with you OP.
There would be so much less angst if people just read profiles   |
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"Why don't ppl just say sorry not interested not my type
No reply is ignorant
Because we can't be arsed "
Lol! The times I've sent a polite 'thank you but not for me' message and received a 'why, what's wrong with me' message back! Sometimes you are damned if you do and damned if you don't! |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
"Why don't ppl just say sorry not interested not my type
No reply is ignorant
Because we can't be arsed
Lol! The times I've sent a polite 'thank you but not for me' message and received a 'why, what's wrong with me' message back! Sometimes you are damned if you do and damned if you don't!"
And why I can't be arsed  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why don't ppl just read profiles before messaging.
Not reading profiles is ignorant
I completely agree with you OP.
There would be so much less angst if people just read profiles "
We read them, we just ignore what we read.  |
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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago
Hillside desolate |
"Come on OP, reply to everyone who’s posted on your thread.
Don’t be ignorant  "
I was just thinking that. Why has he not replied to me? What's wrong with me? Oh well, his loss, I didn't want a reply anyway  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Come on OP, reply to everyone who’s posted on your thread.
Don’t be ignorant
I was just thinking that. Why has he not replied to me? What's wrong with me? Oh well, his loss, I didn't want a reply anyway "
I'll reply if your needy?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why don't ppl just read profiles before messaging.
Not reading profiles is ignorant
I completely agree with you OP.
There would be so much less angst if people just read profiles
We read them, we just ignore what we read. "
Most of my conversations on here are about reading my profile There seems to be a huge difference between reading profiles and actually understanding them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why don't ppl just say sorry not interested not my type
No reply is ignorant
I imagine they think if they reply it opens them up to you trying to convince them why they should be interested in you
For me as long as they delete the message you sent them then at least you can see they are not interested even if it's not communicated in the most direct way"
What if they don't delete the message after reading..what do you think then? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Women literally get hundreds of messages. Just do what I do and don’t message.
I’m sure someone will like the look of your profile eventually.
There are normally 30,000 users online and you can guarentee probably 25000 are single guys with an erection |
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By *inful xWoman
over a year ago
In a sleepy little village |
Saying no often goes like this...
" sorry but you're not my type. Happy fabbing though "
" Oh right. Can I ask why ?"
" Sorry but I'm not attracted to you. As I said happy fabbing "
" I was just being kind offering to fuck you. You're a right fat slag "
Call me ignorant for not replying |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hmmmmmm
Let's see..personally speaking..
Nearly 100 messages today.
Most are one liners, a lot are over 100+miles away, a lot have cock shot profile pics.
I'm not looking to meet anyone new, clearly stated on my profile.
To reply to each would take me, what an hour?
Then there's the return message, trying to change my mind, or the odd abusive one.
No thanks, as clearly stated in site rules, no reply, no intrest
"
This |
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Given the amount of times this issue
Is asked about in forum
Results in abusive or at minimum persistent messages being sent
I have to say I think it should be somewhere more obvious than FAQ's
I'm sure it could be put on in BIG capital letters in the sign up pages |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I has set my expectations to the fact I will be ignored. As a result I am never disappointed.
Not only that but being right all the time does balance the ego of being ignored |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
"It's your profile, three pictures of a limp dick is not very appealing.
To be honest I'm struggling to work out what is in one of the pics."
You had to make me go and look!! It's a bit like that round in Ask The Family where they show you an everyday object taken from an unusual angle!!  |
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By *lceeWoman
over a year ago
Leeds |
Don’t fancy taking on a PA to answer all the messages I do get.
Nothing to do with courtesy, everything to do with having a busy life, job, family...I don’t have the three hours it would take to respond with a polite no thank you.
You’re sitting there staring at your empty inbox, and unreplied sent messages. I’m drowning in guys saying hi.
Don’t take it personally, it really is the only way we keep our heads above water. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"According to the site rules, no reply means a polite no thank you.
I find it polite to block people who I message and don't reply. That means I wont bother them in the future."
Blocking should be used more.
If I am clearly not what someone is looking for I block them. It saves me time and I can’t imagine they’ll shed any tears over it.
So to the OP read the profile and block if you’re not suited or if you get no reply.
Everyone’s a winner. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why should people have to reply? It's not ignorant, it's better than saying no thanks to get a reply back saying something derogatory or whingeing why?!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why don't ppl just say sorry not interested not my type
No reply is ignorant"
You'll go insane if you're tracking messages just send and forget until you see some replies in your inbox |
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By *aelawMan
over a year ago
Paisley |
I think the problem is OP, most that reply a polite "no thank you" tend to then get further messages asking why and potentially leading to rude and sometimes nasty messages. Even I've had it.
If you are happy with your pe and pics, when you see your message is read and deleted or read and they don't reply. Don't worry about It, something just didn't click is all. If you have a wee search you will see that this is a common thread and all the advice is pretty much the same. Just don't let it get you in the feels man
Good luck! |
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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago
Fabville |
All good advice here you'd be well advised to heed, OP.
Ask yourself this...do you reply to any or all of the the junk mail you get through your front door? Probably not...
I would also look at your profile. I did, and I found it very off-putting. I suspect I'm not alone.
Lastly, while this a swingers' club, you getting laid is not a part of membership. Even if you are a gold member...
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"All good advice here you'd be well advised to heed, OP.
Ask yourself this...do you reply to any or all of the the junk mail you get through your front door? Probably not...
I would also look at your profile. I did, and I found it very off-putting. I suspect I'm not alone.
Lastly, while this a swingers' club, you getting laid is not a part of membership. Even if you are a gold member...
"
There's a difference with Junk mail. The sender knows its junk mail.
Lisa, do you open every white envelope that's hand written and had a stamp that's been placed on it?
The problem I have is those that say deleted/unread.
If the site removed the ability to 'mark unread' to a message, everyone would know without a doubt that it was deleted/ignored, or deleted/unread wouldn't we?
The advice to ignore as a polite no, is my biggest gripe in here, it's not welcoming is it? |
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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago
Fabville |
"All good advice here you'd be well advised to heed, OP.
Ask yourself this...do you reply to any or all of the the junk mail you get through your front door? Probably not...
I would also look at your profile. I did, and I found it very off-putting. I suspect I'm not alone.
Lastly, while this a swingers' club, you getting laid is not a part of membership. Even if you are a gold member...
There's a difference with Junk mail. The sender knows its junk mail.
Lisa, do you open every white envelope that's hand written and had a stamp that's been placed on it?
The problem I have is those that say deleted/unread.
If the site removed the ability to 'mark unread' to a message, everyone would know without a doubt that it was deleted/ignored, or deleted/unread wouldn't we?
The advice to ignore as a polite no, is my biggest gripe in here, it's not welcoming is it? "
I hear what you are saying, but ladies do get an awful lot of messages. A percentage of which are one-liners or cut & pasted.
Lx |
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"All good advice here you'd be well advised to heed, OP.
Ask yourself this...do you reply to any or all of the the junk mail you get through your front door? Probably not...
I would also look at your profile. I did, and I found it very off-putting. I suspect I'm not alone.
Lastly, while this a swingers' club, you getting laid is not a part of membership. Even if you are a gold member...
There's a difference with Junk mail. The sender knows its junk mail.
Lisa, do you open every white envelope that's hand written and had a stamp that's been placed on it?
The problem I have is those that say deleted/unread.
If the site removed the ability to 'mark unread' to a message, everyone would know without a doubt that it was deleted/ignored, or deleted/unread wouldn't we?
The advice to ignore as a polite no, is my biggest gripe in here, it's not welcoming is it? "
I understand what you're saying.
However, lets talk about welcoming.
When I joined the site as a single female 5+ years ago I didn't fill in my profile immediately, I wanted to take a few days to decide what to put. I didn't put any pics on for over a week. Within five minutes of signing up, with a blank profile, my inbox had over 200 messages!
A welcome that nearly had me deleting my profile and not coming back.
The site is even busier now so it's probably worse.
As a newbie single female, the first thing I learnt about the site was how to mass delete the hundreds of unwanted messages. The second thing I learnt was what filters are
One thing that I would love to see is all new male profiles are marked as female instead for the first hour. Then we would see a significant reduction in this type of post
On a more serious note I think the site would benefit from all profiles having all filters set on as default and users have to opt into receiving messages rather than the current opt out |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"All good advice here you'd be well advised to heed, OP.
Ask yourself this...do you reply to any or all of the the junk mail you get through your front door? Probably not...
I would also look at your profile. I did, and I found it very off-putting. I suspect I'm not alone.
Lastly, while this a swingers' club, you getting laid is not a part of membership. Even if you are a gold member...
There's a difference with Junk mail. The sender knows its junk mail.
Lisa, do you open every white envelope that's hand written and had a stamp that's been placed on it?
The problem I have is those that say deleted/unread.
If the site removed the ability to 'mark unread' to a message, everyone would know without a doubt that it was deleted/ignored, or deleted/unread wouldn't we?
The advice to ignore as a polite no, is my biggest gripe in here, it's not welcoming is it?
I understand what you're saying.
However, lets talk about welcoming.
When I joined the site as a single female 5+ years ago I didn't fill in my profile immediately, I wanted to take a few days to decide what to put. I didn't put any pics on for over a week. Within five minutes of signing up, with a blank profile, my inbox had over 200 messages!
A welcome that nearly had me deleting my profile and not coming back.
The site is even busier now so it's probably worse.
As a newbie single female, the first thing I learnt about the site was how to mass delete the hundreds of unwanted messages. The second thing I learnt was what filters are
One thing that I would love to see is all new male profiles are marked as female instead for the first hour. Then we would see a significant reduction in this type of post
On a more serious note I think the site would benefit from all profiles having all filters set on as default and users have to opt into receiving messages rather than the current opt out"
I think there's a big enough shout out for something to change from the site owners rather than expecting users (esp new users) to automatically start changing their attitudes and how people naturally interact. An opt in to receive mail is a good idea. |
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"It's your profile, three pictures of a limp dick is not very appealing.
To be honest I'm struggling to work out what is in one of the pics.
You had to make me go and look!! It's a bit like that round in Ask The Family where they show you an everyday object taken from an unusual angle!! "
gemmini,has anyone ever told you your butt looks like a love heart . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We made the mistake of saying no thanks to a member on our couples profile, he asked why so I replied with you’re not what we’re looking for, the abuse I got back was on an epic scale 
Just delete your sent items and forget about them, concentrate on your inbox |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
 Apologies to the Buzzcocks...
When I Fab you night and day
I get no reply, no reply
I keep writing those messages and send them away
To get no reply, no reply
.
No reply oh can't you see
No reply is ruining me
Even when I ask the reason why
I get no reply no reply
No reply, no reply.
I'm bashing my bishop looking at your pics
To get no reply, no reply
I crywank all night, I feel like shite
To get no reply, no reply
.
No reply oh can't you see
I'm genuine please reply to me
Even when I ask the reason why
I get no reply, no reply
No reply, no reply
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
" Apologies to the Buzzcocks...
When I Fab you night and day
I get no reply, no reply
I keep writing those messages and send them away
To get no reply, no reply
.
No reply oh can't you see
No reply is ruining me
Even when I ask the reason why
I get no reply no reply
No reply, no reply.
I'm bashing my bishop looking at your pics
To get no reply, no reply
I crywank all night, I feel like shite
To get no reply, no reply
.
No reply oh can't you see
I'm genuine please reply to me
Even when I ask the reason why
I get no reply, no reply
No reply, no reply
"
Omg!! This is magnificent!! |
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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago
south east |
"Why don't ppl just say sorry not interested not my type
No reply is ignorant"
Not replying is by no means ignorant read the tips section ....worry about what you do on the site not what others do that you have no control over and youll enjoy the site more |
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