FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Blocking repeat unwanted message senders?
Blocking repeat unwanted message senders?
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
I don't tend to block people unless they really annoy/upset/piss me off but I am beginning to wonder if my finger should start to be more flexible towards said button... 
Why do some men message you, then when you don't reply KEEP messaging you ...? It can come across a little desperate 
I know that don't get anywhere near the volume of messages I'm sure some ladies get but it's getting to the point where I have like 10 messages from the same guys saying "you can reply you know"
I DON'T WANT TO ....take the hint please ...
I am nice (on here and in the "real" world  ) so I'd feel a bit mean blocking for no reason but I'm beginning to think I might have to  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
It’s an ego thing.
Most men here start with what they want and don’t get past that. If he’s decided you’re what he wants, he messages incessantly, forgetting that he’s messaging a person who probably has a very different agenda.
In my experience most of the negative acts and behaviours on show on Fab come back to ego.
In my opinion ego has no place in swinging, it’s not about me, it should be about us and you. In my opinion at least.
Sorry you’re being harassed OP x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Blocking isn't being mean. It's a tool to use to stop unwanted communication. I don't understand why some seem to agonise over this. I view it like using the telephone preference service. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I've had to learn to be a bit more harsh too.
I use my block button quite a lot now because some people can't take a hint!
I also think that maybe the site should step in? You get a warning if you message someone who hasn't replied so if you persist then I think the site should block you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
That makes sense but really I don't see it as harrassment which is why I'm reluctant to automatically block them - it just seems a bit desperate on the few men involved.
I know I am not everyone's cup of tea - far from it - but by the same token not every man is mine...
If I message someone and they don't reply I just move on ... lots of other gorgeous men on here    |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Blocking isn't being mean. It's a tool to use to stop unwanted communication. I don't understand why some seem to agonise over this. I view it like using the telephone preference service. "
I'm often told I am "too nice" - therein lies my problem |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I've had to learn to be a bit more harsh too.
I use my block button quite a lot now because some people can't take a hint!
I also think that maybe the site should step in? You get a warning if you message someone who hasn't replied so if you persist then I think the site should block you. "
Why should the site take responsibility for your profile? They've given you a block button. That's precisely why it's there! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It's like buying lots of tickets for a raffle it gives you more chances.
I personally think there is a control element for some men too. You will reply, I'll finally find the words that will make you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It's like buying lots of tickets for a raffle it gives you more chances.
I personally think there is a control element for some men too. You will reply, I'll finally find the words that will make you. "
Haha! Hadn't thought of that
Mind you one guy did message me twice before I replied (lack of time more than not wanting to) and fook! am I glad I did?!! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
You're clearly finding time to notice that they've mailed you lots of times so why not just be polite and reply "no thank you"?
Blocking them would reduce the adoring mail which of course no woman can cope with. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"You're clearly finding time to notice that they've mailed you lots of times so why not just be polite and reply "no thank you"?
Blocking them would reduce the adoring mail which of course no woman can cope with."
I tried the no thank you once or twice and then get "but why" ... looks like I'm just gonna start blocking ... far simpler it seems. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You're clearly finding time to notice that they've mailed you lots of times so why not just be polite and reply "no thank you"?
Blocking them would reduce the adoring mail which of course no woman can cope with.
I tried the no thank you once or twice and then get "but why" ... looks like I'm just gonna start blocking ... far simpler it seems."
If you already replied then no need to reply again. I use site supporter so I can see if I mailed them before. If I never met them I know we're not compatible. 
I very rarely need to block anyone. They must really like you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"You're clearly finding time to notice that they've mailed you lots of times so why not just be polite and reply "no thank you"?
Blocking them would reduce the adoring mail which of course no woman can cope with.
I tried the no thank you once or twice and then get "but why" ... looks like I'm just gonna start blocking ... far simpler it seems.
If you already replied then no need to reply again. I use site supporter so I can see if I mailed them before. If I never met them I know we're not compatible.
I very rarely need to block anyone. They must really like you."
Or be really desperate  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You're clearly finding time to notice that they've mailed you lots of times so why not just be polite and reply "no thank you"?
Blocking them would reduce the adoring mail which of course no woman can cope with.
I tried the no thank you once or twice and then get "but why" ... looks like I'm just gonna start blocking ... far simpler it seems.
If you already replied then no need to reply again. I use site supporter so I can see if I mailed them before. If I never met them I know we're not compatible.
I very rarely need to block anyone. They must really like you.
Or be really desperate "
If you fancy them then meet them.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Blocking isn't being mean. It's a tool to use to stop unwanted communication. I don't understand why some seem to agonise over this. I view it like using the telephone preference service. "
Great analogy |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I don't tend to block people unless they really annoy/upset/piss me off but I am beginning to wonder if my finger should start to be more flexible towards said button...
Why do some men message you, then when you don't reply KEEP messaging you ...? It can come across a little desperate
I know that don't get anywhere near the volume of messages I'm sure some ladies get but it's getting to the point where I have like 10 messages from the same guys saying "you can reply you know"
I DON'T WANT TO ....take the hint please ...
I am nice (on here and in the "real" world ) so I'd feel a bit mean blocking for no reason but I'm beginning to think I might have to "
Hope that wasnt aimed at me sweetie xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"You're clearly finding time to notice that they've mailed you lots of times so why not just be polite and reply "no thank you"?
Blocking them would reduce the adoring mail which of course no woman can cope with.
I tried the no thank you once or twice and then get "but why" ... looks like I'm just gonna start blocking ... far simpler it seems.
If you already replied then no need to reply again. I use site supporter so I can see if I mailed them before. If I never met them I know we're not compatible.
I very rarely need to block anyone. They must really like you.
Or be really desperate
If you fancy them then meet them.
"
I don't tho ... the ones I fancy I reply to their messages pretty swiftly |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I am nice (on here and in the "real" world ) so I'd feel a bit mean blocking for no reason but I'm beginning to think I might have to "
You say it's blocking for no reason but what you've described of repeated messages when you've not replied is a damn good reason to block. The new mailbox has highlighted this more, when I see 3 and 4 messages all one liners and no reply from me imreach for block. See it as putting them out of their misery lol. Harsh comment maybe but it comes back to the junk mail thing so doesn't warrant your time spent replying no thanks  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I don't tend to block people unless they really annoy/upset/piss me off but I am beginning to wonder if my finger should start to be more flexible towards said button...
Why do some men message you, then when you don't reply KEEP messaging you ...? It can come across a little desperate
I know that don't get anywhere near the volume of messages I'm sure some ladies get but it's getting to the point where I have like 10 messages from the same guys saying "you can reply you know"
I DON'T WANT TO ....take the hint please ...
I am nice (on here and in the "real" world ) so I'd feel a bit mean blocking for no reason but I'm beginning to think I might have to
Hope that wasnt aimed at me sweetie xx"
I reply to you  xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I am nice (on here and in the "real" world ) so I'd feel a bit mean blocking for no reason but I'm beginning to think I might have to
You say it's blocking for no reason but what you've described of repeated messages when you've not replied is a damn good reason to block. The new mailbox has highlighted this more, when I see 3 and 4 messages all one liners and no reply from me imreach for block. See it as putting them out of their misery lol. Harsh comment maybe but it comes back to the junk mail thing so doesn't warrant your time spent replying no thanks "
Thanks - the new mailbox was what highlighted this for me |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eeBee67Man
over a year ago
Masked and Distant |
"I don't tend to block people unless they really annoy/upset/piss me off but I am beginning to wonder if my finger should start to be more flexible towards said button...
Why do some men message you, then when you don't reply KEEP messaging you ...? It can come across a little desperate
I know that don't get anywhere near the volume of messages I'm sure some ladies get but it's getting to the point where I have like 10 messages from the same guys saying "you can reply you know"
I DON'T WANT TO ....take the hint please ...
I am nice (on here and in the "real" world ) so I'd feel a bit mean blocking for no reason but I'm beginning to think I might have to "
Oh ohhh.
I promise to send you less messages
Love the new pic |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I don't tend to block people unless they really annoy/upset/piss me off but I am beginning to wonder if my finger should start to be more flexible towards said button...
Why do some men message you, then when you don't reply KEEP messaging you ...? It can come across a little desperate
I know that don't get anywhere near the volume of messages I'm sure some ladies get but it's getting to the point where I have like 10 messages from the same guys saying "you can reply you know"
I DON'T WANT TO ....take the hint please ...
I am nice (on here and in the "real" world ) so I'd feel a bit mean blocking for no reason but I'm beginning to think I might have to
Oh ohhh.
I promise to send you less messages
Love the new pic "
Don't you dare Tee x
Thank you
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I don't tend to block people unless they really annoy/upset/piss me off but I am beginning to wonder if my finger should start to be more flexible towards said button...
Why do some men message you, then when you don't reply KEEP messaging you ...? It can come across a little desperate
I know that don't get anywhere near the volume of messages I'm sure some ladies get but it's getting to the point where I have like 10 messages from the same guys saying "you can reply you know"
I DON'T WANT TO ....take the hint please ...
I am nice (on here and in the "real" world ) so I'd feel a bit mean blocking for no reason but I'm beginning to think I might have to "
Men don't do hints! Tell them politely they're not for you and block x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I don't tend to block people unless they really annoy/upset/piss me off but I am beginning to wonder if my finger should start to be more flexible towards said button...
Why do some men message you, then when you don't reply KEEP messaging you ...? It can come across a little desperate
I know that don't get anywhere near the volume of messages I'm sure some ladies get but it's getting to the point where I have like 10 messages from the same guys saying "you can reply you know"
I DON'T WANT TO ....take the hint please ...
I am nice (on here and in the "real" world ) so I'd feel a bit mean blocking for no reason but I'm beginning to think I might have to
Men don't do hints! Tell them politely they're not for you and block x"
Glad I put this out here - you have all shown me my thinking was right
Thank you |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
When i had my single profile,I was ruthless with the block button.Hate pushy people ,I always think if they have no respect dealing on here,what would they be like in real life?.
The block button is a good tool.
.miss |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"When i had my single profile,I was ruthless with the block button.Hate pushy people ,I always think if they have no respect dealing on here,what would they be like in real life?.
The block button is a good tool.
.miss"
Very good point |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
A lot of guys seem to think they are owed an answer regardless what it is, yes it’s a little disheartening when your message gets deleted or left read without a reply, but if these guys would take time and read the rules of the site they’d understand that a response isn’t mandatory.
I delete my sent items so I don’t know what’s the outcome was and if I pass a profile I’ve messaged before but had no response back, then I just leave it.
As I’ve said in the past, sexual frustration has a lot to answer for |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Boy POV ... I know you gals get lots of messages ... but if mine isn't read I don't know if that's because you don't want to, didn't have the time, or just missed it. So, yeah, I do tend to remessage. And I've since met or chatted within ppl that ignored the first (few) messages ... so I don't think it's completely unfair on my part
(For the record my message are always funny and personal and sans dick pics ... not a one line copy and paste job! ) |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I wish that ladies would use the block button more, that way it would leave me in no doubt the position.
I spend a lot of time tailoring a message directly to a lady...it is read...and then nothing...not even deleted...
What does that mean to the poster? It leaves doubt in his mind.
I would appreciate to honesty of a block. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
We have started to block repeat senders but we are talking 3 or 4 messages because if we weren’t interested 1st we aren’t interested now they sound more pushy and whiny, it seems some people just can’t except they aren’t your cup of tea  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Boy POV ... I know you gals get lots of messages ... but if mine isn't read I don't know if that's because you don't want to, didn't have the time, or just missed it. So, yeah, I do tend to remessage. And I've since met or chatted within ppl that ignored the first (few) messages ... so I don't think it's completely unfair on my part
(For the record my message are always funny and personal and sans dick pics ... not a one line copy and paste job! )"
Your kind of messages definitely get a reply from me ... it's the one liners that make me hover over block |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I wish that ladies would use the block button more, that way it would leave me in no doubt the position.
I spend a lot of time tailoring a message directly to a lady...it is read...and then nothing...not even deleted...
What does that mean to the poster? It leaves doubt in his mind.
I would appreciate to honesty of a block."
Again tailored messages get a reply from me |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"When i had my single profile,I was ruthless with the block button.Hate pushy people ,I always think if they have no respect dealing on here,what would they be like in real life?.
The block button is a good tool.
.miss"
Conversely there are a fair few ladies who say if they haven't replied they may have missed the message in the morass of their inbox so try more than once.
I'll generally send one message and maybe if I'm really keen send a 2nd in case the 1st was missed a few days/weeks later. If the 2nd is ignored add a private note saying 'Not interested'.
Flip side, if I get a reply saying no thanks I don't harass |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"When i had my single profile,I was ruthless with the block button.Hate pushy people ,I always think if they have no respect dealing on here,what would they be like in real life?.
The block button is a good tool.
.miss
Conversely there are a fair few ladies who say if they haven't replied they may have missed the message in the morass of their inbox so try more than once.
I'll generally send one message and maybe if I'm really keen send a 2nd in case the 1st was missed a few days/weeks later. If the 2nd is ignored add a private note saying 'Not interested'.
Flip side, if I get a reply saying no thanks I don't harass "
I should have expanded a bit it's mostly the "hi want to chat/fuck", "nice tits" type messages I get lots of repeats of ... I love to receive a message or fifty that are designed just for me |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I used to feel 'bad' about blocking anyone except the most obviously abusive types. Not sure why really, but have become far more hardened now and block the sort of repeat offenders you mention without feeling anything. The ones who message again - and again - even *after* even you've already said a polite no thanks particularly annoy me ... this means either they're pushy, or, that they can't even remember contacting you in the first place and are just sending out messages with a scattergun approach which is hardly flattering. I also block anyone - no matter how 'polite' their initial message is, if they make my spidey senses tingle at all. This could be some turn of phrase which makes me uncomfortable or something in their profile suggesting entitlement for example. I now see the block button as a means of protecting myself from possible future abuse which is more important than upsetting a random stranger's sensibilities. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I used to feel 'bad' about blocking anyone except the most obviously abusive types. Not sure why really, but have become far more hardened now and block the sort of repeat offenders you mention without feeling anything. The ones who message again - and again - even *after* even you've already said a polite no thanks particularly annoy me ... this means either they're pushy, or, that they can't even remember contacting you in the first place and are just sending out messages with a scattergun approach which is hardly flattering. I also block anyone - no matter how 'polite' their initial message is, if they make my spidey senses tingle at all. This could be some turn of phrase which makes me uncomfortable or something in their profile suggesting entitlement for example. I now see the block button as a means of protecting myself from possible future abuse which is more important than upsetting a random stranger's sensibilities. "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
Again tailored messages get a reply from me
If only more ladies were like you "
It always will from me too even if a polite no thank you. It's the one liners and copy and pastes that don't deserve any attention |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Boy POV ... I know you gals get lots of messages ... but if mine isn't read I don't know if that's because you don't want to, didn't have the time, or just missed it. So, yeah, I do tend to remessage. And I've since met or chatted within ppl that ignored the first (few) messages ... so I don't think it's completely unfair on my part
(For the record my message are always funny and personal and sans dick pics ... not a one line copy and paste job! )"
Very good point! There's no way of knowing if the message just slipped down the page without being seen. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"With some guys you really have to spell it out to them, sometimes the only way is to block them.
Don't feel bad about it OP!!! "
I won't now! Glad I got your opinions - thanks |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
If a man messages me constantly I end up replying just to say 'I'm not interested. Stop messaging.'
This is usually followed by a reply saying, 'sorry, I wont bother you again.'
An hour later they're sending the same messages again!
If you've told them you're not interested and they're still doing it then yeah, go ahead and block!
"That makes sense but really I don't see it as harrassment which is why I'm reluctant to automatically block them - it just seems a bit desperate on the few men involved.
I know I am not everyone's cup of tea - far from it - but by the same token not every man is mine...
If I message someone and they don't reply I just move on ... lots of other gorgeous men on here "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
