FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Lack of confidence
Lack of confidence
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Do you guys think this is th right place to gain some body confidence?
I suffer with mine a lot, and I'm very self deprecating. So on the rare occasion a positive comment comes my way, I always make a joke and pass it off. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Certainly boosted my confidence a little but Can work both ways. I find that woman tend to be far less harsh or judgemental than guys so a positive comment is more likely in my experience. Unfortunately there seems to be a lot of negativity around which gets directed at the ladies for the most part.
Just celebrate our differences and enjoy each other no matter what  |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
The internet is no place to be looking for body confidence, you need to have it beforehand otherwise there will always be someone to shoot you down lol, hell I've had more than my fair share I can assure you  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Join in with naturism, we don't give a stuff what each other looks like. "
Yes! Apart from feeling amazing and free, naturism has been a fabulous confidence booster, to feel so comfortable and liberated in your own skin is a very attractive quality!
Peach x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Join in with naturism, we don't give a stuff what each other looks like.
Yes! Apart from feeling amazing and free, naturism has been a fabulous confidence booster, to feel so comfortable and liberated in your own skin is a very attractive quality!
Peach x"
To many people are conditioned to believe that they should perpetually look eighteen, and if they don't then there are loads of snake oil salesmen who can help.
Genetically you are going to end up looking like your mum or dad and no amount of powder, potions or wizardry is going to change that.
Halve the angst in you life and just be you.
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"Do you guys think this is th right place to gain some body confidence?
I suffer with mine a lot, and I'm very self deprecating. So on the rare occasion a positive comment comes my way, I always make a joke and pass it off."
I never pay compliments unless I genuinely mean them and I think women in general are less likely to flatter a guy to get sex than vice versa. I think you look just fine.
However if you're the kind of person who will believe one bad comment over 100 good ones this is no place to build your body confidence. You need to do that for yourself.
I have never been under confident about my body but I became a lot more body positive when Mr N started photographing me in lingerie and nude. I saw for myself what I really looked like and realised it was ok. Look at yourself with positive eyes, don't compare yourself to other men and recognise your good points |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You can't lack that much body confidence,otherwise I feel you wouldn't be on here."
I'd have to disagree with you there....5 years ago I couldn't even look at myself in the mirror without crying and often having a panic attack, I had to apply my make up using a compact mirror because I couldn't bare the sight of my own face....
I had a profile on here then...I'm pretty good at putting on a front.
OP....don't rely on the site to give you confidence, that comes from within. However it will probably make you realise that very few other people will see the things you worry about and that will no doubt give you a little boost   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't think coming here to gain body confidence is a good idea, you have to be pretty thick skinned on Fab. However it has boosted my confidence, seeing there is plenty of appreciation for various body types. I'm always a little wary of compliments though, how often is there an ulterior motive? T x |
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"The internet is no place to be looking for body confidence, you need to have it beforehand otherwise there will always be someone to shoot you down lol, hell I've had more than my fair share I can assure you "
I agree. |
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I think confidence comes from being realistic.
For instance if someone tells me I look 30 I know it isn't true so I discount it as false flattery. Likewise if someone tells me I'm ugly (physically) I discount it because I know that isn't true either. However if I believe myself to be ugly or look half my age those comments are going to reinforce my opinion of myself.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've been on a "body journey" the past 18 months and joining fab had helped with my confidence but most of my confidence has come from realising that I am me, warts and all (even tho I haven't actually had a wart since I was about 6!!  ) and not everyone I gonna like me but that's fine, for every one who doesn't there is usually one who does.
Like YOURSELF OP, be confident in who you are and us women will love that xx |
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Maybe try not to take yourself too seriously, if someone says something positive just say thanks and dont think too much about it. If your partner has lost interest in sex then meeting a lot of people on here can sometimes make you feel a bit more confident in some ways. |
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"You can't lack that much body confidence,otherwise I feel you wouldn't be on here.
I'd have to disagree with you there....5 years ago I couldn't even look at myself in the mirror without crying and often having a panic attack, I had to apply my make up using a compact mirror because I couldn't bare the sight of my own face....
I had a profile on here then...I'm pretty good at putting on a front.
OP....don't rely on the site to give you confidence, that comes from within. However it will probably make you realise that very few other people will see the things you worry about and that will no doubt give you a little boost "
I understand what you're saying,for me personally if I felt that strongly and negative about my body I wouldn't be on here. Likewise if I felt that strongly I certainly wouldn't take my clothes of for a man. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Honestly I don't think that this site is doing any man good that doesn't feel confident about himself. Women get swamped with compliments on here while just few men on here will get a similar response as it seems like you have to be a fitness model with min 8" and a face like brad pitt to get a woman's attention... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's helped me but only in as much as it's helped motivate me to improve my body, I've lost a lot of weight since joining. When you know you are going to be naked in a room full of people and going to be watched fucking that's a damn good motivator to try and get in some sort of shape. |
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"Do you guys think this is th right place to gain some body confidence?
I suffer with mine a lot, and I'm very self deprecating. So on the rare occasion a positive comment comes my way, I always make a joke and pass it off."
It may sound cold but I'm not here to massage egos and boost confidence. I'm seeking fun people who are confident and comfortable in their own skin.
That said, we're all different. Just because the opinions of casual acquaintances don't bother me, I recognise it's important to others.
My advice, don't over think it just take it for what it is and have fun.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Honestly I don't think that this site is doing any man good that doesn't feel confident about himself. Women get swamped with compliments on here while just few men on here will get a similar response as it seems like you have to be a fitness model with min 8" and a face like brad pitt to get a woman's attention..."
That is SO not true  |
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"Join in with naturism, we don't give a stuff what each other looks like.
Yes! Apart from feeling amazing and free, naturism has been a fabulous confidence booster, to feel so comfortable and liberated in your own skin is a very attractive quality!
Peach x
To many people are conditioned to believe that they should perpetually look eighteen, and if they don't then there are loads of snake oil salesmen who can help.
Genetically you are going to end up looking like your mum or dad and no amount of powder, potions or wizardry is going to change that.
Halve the angst in you life and just be you.
"
Very well put! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Female monsters with no pics and no profile can get massive ego boosts from men saying how gorgeous they look. Such bollocks.
Men can get no replies, or abuse telling them to fuck off and how dare they mail Princess Fab.
Don't get drawn into the hype and just be happy. |
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In a club you'll see people of all shapes and sizes. Big girls, hot women who have mummy tummies, flat chests, dad bods, cocks of all shapes and sizes.
We are all different and generally far from perfect.
Take confidence in the fact we all have imperfections. You are what you are. |
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"Honestly I don't think that this site is doing any man good that doesn't feel confident about himself. Women get swamped with compliments on here while just few men on here will get a similar response as it seems like you have to be a fitness model with min 8" and a face like brad pitt to get a woman's attention..."
Utter rubbish!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That is SO not true
Like what of it?"
I don't go looking for cock size, nor someone who looks like Brad Pitt (don't like pretty boys).
The men who get replies from me make an effort in their messages - THAT'S what makes me reply
Oh and of course it's only my opinion so you may be partially right I guess  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That is SO not true
Like what of it?
I don't go looking for cock size, nor someone who looks like Brad Pitt (don't like pretty boys).
The men who get replies from me make an effort in their messages - THAT'S what makes me reply
Oh and of course it's only my opinion so you may be partially right I guess "
You don't like pretty boys? Well than I am like made for you |
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"I don't think the Internet is the place to be in general if confidence is something you lack
Too many dickheads throwing their opinions around wether you ask for them or not "
You dont just get that on the internet though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That is SO not true
Like what of it?
I don't go looking for cock size, nor someone who looks like Brad Pitt (don't like pretty boys).
The men who get replies from me make an effort in their messages - THAT'S what makes me reply
Oh and of course it's only my opinion so you may be partially right I guess
You don't like pretty boys? Well than I am like made for you"
Maybe we should talk then |
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"I don't think the Internet is the place to be in general if confidence is something you lack
Too many dickheads throwing their opinions around wether you ask for them or not
You dont just get that on the internet though."
True but more rife online with the safety of their generic profiles and screens to hide behind |
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"Join in with naturism, we don't give a stuff what each other looks like.
Yes! Apart from feeling amazing and free, naturism has been a fabulous confidence booster, to feel so comfortable and liberated in your own skin is a very attractive quality!
Peach x"
Wot they said !! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I messaged someone on here, put some effort into the message, the reply "there's no way you're 42" and a instant block, whilst not looking for someone to massage my ego or give Faldo promises ny thought is if you can't say anything nice then don't bother messaging. Men outnumber the women here so luckily for them they have a better percentage to choose from |
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