FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > when a guy ghosts a woman...

when a guy ghosts a woman...

By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

ghosting means he just stops all contact, no interest in her or her well being.

well, say the guy fucked her and she got pregnant, she has ways to contact him. do you think she should?

i personally think no, coz he don't give a shit and doesn't deserve to be a part of her pregnancy, but wondering what reasoning others would have for their answer to this.

i'm sure this situation must arise on here.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yes she should.

He had the right to know he's going to be a father.

Your posts are becoming increasingly more and more anti men. I think it's sad

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

what id she wanted an abortion, should she contact him then?

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

*if

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By *.gerri.xTV/TS over a year ago

North west

If she has no intention of getting back together or he doesn't , the abortion is her choice.

If she's going to keep the baby I'd say he needs to know purely to avoid issues in the future when the kid wants to know who the dad is , hard to give an opinion without knowing all the facts and people

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Personally I would say yes he has the right to know and could be a thousand reasons why he hasn't been in touch he may need help himself!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Agree with that. I reckon it's his job to be involved and help, child has rights and he has responsibility. So has she too, so she tells him that,

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

thanks both.

ghosting is also a type of mental abuse, does that change anyones opinion?

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By *rMrs-Luv-ItCouple over a year ago

cwmbranish

Not telling him she is pregnant with his child is an even worse form of mental abuse I think . Although I like most wouldn't see "Ghosting" as mental abuse .

(him)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Not if she chooses abortion, he has zero rights.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I've never heard of that before to do it as abuse as would only be able to do it once!

I've sort of done it myself many years ago I was having a really bad time just sold everything I had hitched to southern Spain and lived in a teepee on side of mountain for 3years

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"Not telling him she is pregnant with his child is an even worse form of mental abuse I think . Although I like most wouldn't see "Ghosting" as mental abuse .

(him)"

it's form of abandonment. that is why it's considered abuse.

but i suppose you could also look at it this way, if you don't tell the dad then he has no option but to abandon his child. but the child has already been abandoned in a way coz he ghosted to mum and didn't care about her, so this also makes you wonder if he'd do this to his kid anyway. i usually believe in giving people choices but sometimes, if protection is needed, then no i don't think they should know all the facts.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If abuse involved then it's harder for her to keep clear of him and still keep him involved with the child, maybe get support. I think there are agencies around to support her still I hope. Police if she's harassed

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"If abuse involved then it's harder for her to keep clear of him and still keep him involved with the child, maybe get support. I think there are agencies around to support her still I hope. Police if she's harassed "

there's no laws against ghosting someone.and i get you can't force someone to be a part of somebodys life also.

maybe telling him about the baby would make him feel forced to be involved?

see it's all confusing...

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By *rMrs-Luv-ItCouple over a year ago

cwmbranish

If you want people to make informed opinions then giving them ALL the facts will help . I would like some facts as to say he screwed her once and is now ignoring her isn't mental abuse . Maybe the woman is stalking him now ?. The fact it was only once (if it was) makes the guy out to be ok as he don't want to give the wrong impression . The fact the woman is fixating on a single meet comes across as a "Fatal Attraction" type and he has had a lucky escape .

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By *rMrs-Luv-ItCouple over a year ago

cwmbranish

Just an alternative viewpoint as I have no facts lol

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"If you want people to make informed opinions then giving them ALL the facts will help . I would like some facts as to say he screwed her once and is now ignoring her isn't mental abuse . Maybe the woman is stalking him now ?. The fact it was only once (if it was) makes the guy out to be ok as he don't want to give the wrong impression . The fact the woman is fixating on a single meet comes across as a "Fatal Attraction" type and he has had a lucky escape .

that's coz you're thinking he was an NSA fuck maybe? but i didn't leave much details in the OP coz this is hypothetical and based off reading someones comment where they joked about leaving a woman to it if she did get pregnant, like lie to her for sex and to protect themselves form an unwanted pregnancy, it just got me thinking especially as i was in a relationship at 17 and has something similar happen to me.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Hmmm yes but I think he ought to be involved because the child has a right to know who he is. his job to be a dad, and might need a good kick start....that's what she's got after all so it's fair!

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By *rMrs-Luv-ItCouple over a year ago

cwmbranish

Yeah hypothetical isn't my strong suit being male i'm more of a practical hands on sorta guy lol .

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"Yeah hypothetical isn't my strong suit being male i'm more of a practical hands on sorta guy lol ."

that's ok, gerri said something similar that it depended on all the facts exactly.

i overthink so hypothetical works well for me.

i do think ghosting gives a clear message that that person does not want you in their life and does not even respect you enough to tell you this either.

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By *rMrs-Luv-ItCouple over a year ago

cwmbranish

As for the abortion point , well I had this grand speech about why it should be a mutual decision between both parties but the woman does have the final say .

Then I thought "What if" and stopped instantly as thinking and me don't get on .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Tthe woman more than likely has mental issues, obviously reading more in the situation than it is, and is quite clearly getting into stalker terrotitory, which is almost always they she is being "ghosted", is nothing to do with the man.....she should not be on a swingers site if she can't handle rejection....and the fact that she allowed herself to get pregnant in the first class is her own lack of responbability and maturity.....but then this if all hypothetical of course....

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

i know, i'm thinking too much now about my past. like i got ghosted off a boyfriend when i told him i was pregnant, he was 32 so old enough to know better really.

wish i hadn't told him but i was only 17 and didn't know what to do. i honestly don't think he deserved to know, he didn't even deserve to put me in the position of getting me pregnant if i really think about it.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

not everything revolves around swinging but swinging answers and opinions are fine too. in factit's quite interesting to see peoples mindsets.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have had a couple of messages from guys saying they want to impregnate me.....blocked and deleted dude, blocked and deleted?.....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Yes she should.

He had the right to know he's going to be a father.

Your posts are becoming increasingly more and more anti men. I think it's sad

Dont read them then. No need to jump on your white horse and protect the delicate poor men on here. Or you could always start your own thread championing men.

Well OP it's a tricky one. Depends on the ladies situation. Does she need financial support? I believe that a child needs a father, however if he's a knob then no I'd go it alone. Some amazing children are raised by fantastic single parents.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

that's not usually true about the stalker thing though, it's sad to see a woman being blamed when she's already been dumped on.

sometimes people get too attached and ghost, they're cheating so ghost, or they're just dickheads who don't care and so ghost.

i decided to ghost just about everyone i've met on here now coz i don't wanna meet them again. that's how NSA and i get it's ok to do that coz there wasn't really any communication between meets or consistency about when we'd have them so i just fucked them off, true NSA.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"Yes she should.

He had the right to know he's going to be a father.

Your posts are becoming increasingly more and more anti men. I think it's sad

Dont read them then. No need to jump on your white horse and protect the delicate poor men on here. Or you could always start your own thread championing men.

yeah a few needed to know details but i wanted to leave it open to get more opinions and different ones.

as a single parent myself i agree we can do it ourselves.

my ex is also a single parent and he's great. we kind of do it together actually but not together lol.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

well, i suppose i more wanted answers based on a person being abandoned by a guy and whether she should tell him or not after he did that.

abandoned implies there was some commitment though so maybe i could also get opinions based on if they didn't know each other that well or if there was no commitment implied at all (which already someone gave their NSA/swingers opinion).

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By *rMrs-Luv-ItCouple over a year ago

cwmbranish

I raised two kids from little as a single parent . They both work now and have done since leaving school . They are my greatest achievement in life . The icing on the cake is I raised them at a time when a Single "Male" parent was practically unheard of .

HIM

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"I raised two kids from little as a single parent . They both work now and have done since leaving school . They are my greatest achievement in life . The icing on the cake is I raised them at a time when a Single "Male" parent was practically unheard of .

HIM "

i like how guys get involved with their kids because they want to do that, it's good things changed there.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Speaking personally 3sumQueen I'd like some communication! But if there wasn't any and you were pregnant would you think differently? I reckon single parents can manage ok, but it looks hard work to me, and two separated parents Can manage better....different if he's an idiot!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Yes she should.

He had the right to know he's going to be a father.

Your posts are becoming increasingly more and more anti men. I think it's sad

I'd noticed that too

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"Speaking personally 3sumQueen I'd like some communication! But if there wasn't any and you were pregnant would you think differently? I reckon single parents can manage ok, but it looks hard work to me, and two separated parents Can manage better....different if he's an idiot!"

yeah i think most guys would want to know. thing is you have to reason why they'd want to know really and if it's a good idea. all i'm asking on was if the guy had left the womans life did he have the right to know? just was wondering if ignoring a person gave them the right to know anything that happened in the ignored persons life, after all they aren't interested in that person.

my abusive ex used his children as a way to control me after i dumped him, he also ghosted me and the kids a lot. just came in and out of our lives whenever he felt like it and expected us to change to suit him and what he wanted.

my decent ex never ghosted me, we communicated and so i am perfectly comfortable talking with him about our children about anything. never had any problems with him at all, and he even took on his stepkids like his too so the kids of the douche are sorted too.

and yes i'm aware i pick the knobheads, my decent ex it was just luck that he chased me and i let him. i honestly think that.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"Yes she should.

He had the right to know he's going to be a father.

Your posts are becoming increasingly more and more anti men. I think it's sad

I'd noticed that too

how is this anti men? hate it when people ruin my topics with bullshit but i wanna know now.

it's about women being ghosted primarily so about women for a start and what they should decide and i'm sure loads of women have to deal with this issue also coz ghosting happens a lot and always has done even before internet fuck sites.

you're both looking like the MRA tbh.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I wish I hadn't read this thread but I have. I have a strong view about this IF it were me. Firstly in a ghosting situation, there is no man in this womans life and no man to be considered. The man ghosted because of selfish reasons. This is a man who does not care. Secondly, it's the life of this woman that's at jeopardy. Having a child unsupported is no small feat. I just see abortion.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'd say women are just as capable of causing upset by ghosting men, too!

Ghosting in most cases is down to the person either not having the bollocks to be honest that they're no longer interested, or being completely indifferent to that persons feelings.

Plenty of women have found out they're pregnant and ghosted the fella, for various reasons.

I'd suggest in this case the woman contact the man and let him know, just to be a decent human being rather than react to his ghosting in a similar way.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

there's no right or wrong answer, thanks both.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

No it's not anti men 3sumQ and you should cut yourself slack for doing a good job

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"No it's not anti men 3sumQ and you should cut yourself slack for doing a good job"

thanks. i didn't think it was anti-anything. i just gave my opinion and wanted other opinions. don't care if they agree with me or not, i just like seeing what others think, when they're not insulting me and acting like they know me. my green arrow doesn't even show anything anti-men either.

i did some small penis humiliation on some guys who wanted that in the forums but they enjoyed it, not like i was doing it coz i hate men.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Personally I think she should tell him. Find a way if contact was cut to tell him. At the end of the day it is his child. What happens after she tells him well that's up to her.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Ghosting" is a vile, spineless action, that's a reflection of today's "disposable society".

I've had it done to me, and it was savage, whilst ex partner (she) considers it normal acceptable behaviour, to this day.

I've also encountered another partner, whom was a "moment" in time, and when I finished it, advised "she was pregnant", was keeping "it" as a way to "stay in contact with me".

Suffice to say, I took legal advice, and tried discussing it with her. She, was changing her mind daily, she eventually decided on abortion, didn't want me at the clinic (took money for appointment) texted when "done" and her behaviour utterly bonkers before, and after. Several years later, she was still stalking me, my related family, and her conduct ended up in court.

Turns out she was never pregnant, took her 6 years to admit that...

maybe "ghosting" isn't so bad after all ....

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

""Ghosting" is a vile, spineless action, that's a reflection of today's "disposable society".

I've had it done to me, and it was savage, whilst ex partner (she) considers it normal acceptable behaviour, to this day.

I've also encountered another partner, whom was a "moment" in time, and when I finished it, advised "she was pregnant", was keeping "it" as a way to "stay in contact with me".

Turns out she was never pregnant, took her 6 years to admit that...

maybe "ghosting" isn't so bad after all ...."

shit that's awful, sorry my topic brought that up for you but thanks for sharing coz that's a side that i didn't consider at all.

all those years she let you think you'd lost a child and pay for the privilege, that's disgusting.

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By *SAchickWoman over a year ago

Hillside desolate

If she is planning on an abortion no matter what, what's the point in telling him really? Better that he doesn't know.

If she's planning on keeping the baby then yes she should tell him. There could be endless reasons he cut contact with her, doesn't mean he wouldn't be interested in his own kid. If he's not interested once she tells him, well then she's no worse off.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS over a year ago

Central

Ordinarily from ghosting I'd say that you would deal with it and let go. But from pregnancy, I'd make great effort to track the guy down to inform him. The child's future would potentially be influenced by him and I'd think it right to include him, even if it's just so that he can provide limited support.

The guy may be awful but deserves to know that he has fathered children.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"No it's not anti men 3sumQ and you should cut yourself slack for doing a good job"

I agree!

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By *gnitemybodyWoman over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"No it's not anti men 3sumQ and you should cut yourself slack for doing a good job

I agree! "
,it was a completely cruel thing for your ex to ignore you when you 17 and told him you were pregnant,very cruel!

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

my self preservation (based on past experiences) tells me to maybe not tell him until after the birth is registered, that way at least you could have a DNA test to prove he's the dad and he has no rights to his child via the birth certificate but can have the chance to prove that he won't ghost his child as well and then get those rights.

this is presuming all sides are reasonable obviously.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"No it's not anti men 3sumQ and you should cut yourself slack for doing a good job

I agree! ,it was a completely cruel thing for your ex to ignore you when you 17 and told him you were pregnant,very cruel!"

thanks.

my mum went round to his work and gave him hell. he was married, that's why he ghosted me. i didn't know he was married though, i was seriously very naive as a kid/teen and didn't even know married people cheated. he worked with his stepson though so his wife found out from him that i'd got pregnant when my mum went in ranting.

and people will probably think i'm horrible for saying this but i miscarried his baby and am glad. i was upset at the time but when i think about it i could've ended up with no life at 17 and bringing up a kid to someone who didn't even care about it or me. it was bad enough when i got pregnant to my douche ex at 23 and doing that but at least i had more experience of life by then and could cope better.

i don't hate men, surprisingly. i fell in love with one recently, i don't hate men at all but i probably should.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I still reckon it's about responsibility and child's rights to have parents. If he won't pick that up then he's an idiot, especially if he insists he has rights.....I think he has none, whether he's on the certificate or not, if he's not doing his job as a dad. It's not for you for make him do that, but maybe give him the chance

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By *ophieslutTV/TS over a year ago

Central

Post as you wish 3SQ, and don't feel that you have to justify yourself (I don't think you feel that). Interesting subjects and points.

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By *lkDomWhtSubBiCpleCouple over a year ago

Somewhere / Everywhere /Kinksville

"Yes she should.

He had the right to know he's going to be a father.

Your posts are becoming increasingly more and more anti men. I think it's sad

Dont read them then. No need to jump on your white horse and protect the delicate poor men on here. Or you could always start your own thread championing men.

Paternal involvement shouldn't just be invited for financial gain

He should be informed and given the opportunity to play the part. It's very selfish to automatically exclude because he's not being the man you want him to be. He might still make a fantastic father.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"I still reckon it's about responsibility and child's rights to have parents. If he won't pick that up then he's an idiot, especially if he insists he has rights.....I think he has none, whether he's on the certificate or not, if he's not doing his job as a dad. It's not for you for make him do that, but maybe give him the chance"

the certificate is a legal document so they do get rights from being on it, even from things like where their child can be educated (seen my sister go through so much shit with her ex husband because of these rights).

i never put my first ex on his kids, he didn't care anyway. problem kind of solved.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"Post as you wish 3SQ, and don't feel that you have to justify yourself (I don't think you feel that). Interesting subjects and points.

thanks

i know i'm fucked up, just not as fucked up as some people think.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The birth cert can give him parental responsibility, which you get automatically, so it's shared between you. How you share it is up to you and him, but you won't if he's an idiot and the child lives with you. Back where we started really!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Nothing fucked up about what you're saying. Sounds ok to me

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"The birth cert can give him parental responsibility, which you get automatically, so it's shared between you. How you share it is up to you and him, but you won't if he's an idiot and the child lives with you. Back where we started really!"

he basically has to go to court i think if he wants to contest the resident parent, from what i remember with my sister and her flakey ex. he was always threatening court when things didn't go his way.

still it was handy not having my bad ex on the certificates of his kids. if he'd ever asked to be put on them i actually would've agreed too for his kids sake but he never did.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"Nothing fucked up about what you're saying. Sounds ok to me"

well you haven't stalked all my forum posts so you wouldn't know.

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By *lkDomWhtSubBiCpleCouple over a year ago

Somewhere / Everywhere /Kinksville

If some of these fathers are deemed to be so irresponsible, then it wasnt the right decision to go making babies with them.

I haven't had the easiest time with my ex, but for my daughters sake I respect he's her father and whatever she can get from that relationship.

Unless there are exceptional circumstances that would endanger mother or child, I think every father and child have a right to know.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Yes she should.

He had the right to know he's going to be a father.

Your posts are becoming increasingly more and more anti men. I think it's sad

I'd noticed that too

how is this anti men? hate it when people ruin my topics with bullshit but i wanna know now.

you're both looking like the MRA tbh."

What does MRA stand for?

As for my anti-men comment, I meant it more in a way that you've obviously been hurt a lot by men over the years and reading some of your replies on here you've had some shit men in your life but it's nice to see that you've had a decent ex too

As for the ghosting, it depends how serious the couple were. A one night stand and he then disappears. Well, that must happen practically every day of the week.

A more serious relationship in which he just cuts contact, then he's an arse BUT I still think if she's pregnant and decides to keep the baby that if she can, she at least tells the father or a relative of his that she's pregnant.

Being a father and being a partner are two separate things and he may have been an arse as a partner but could be a fantastic father.

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By *rMrs-Luv-ItCouple over a year ago

cwmbranish

I had to go to court to be granted parental responsibility to my kids even thought I was dad . I then went and got full custody after she turned back up a few months later saying she wanted the kids back .

I told her to f/off they don't need someone popping in and out there lives whenever things went wrong for her . Best move I ever made . The exes solicitor told her not to contest my custody application as the reports from all sources the court ordered recommended they stay in my full time care .

I always allowed her contact whenever she wanted and never spoke a bad word about her in front of the kids . When they grew up they discovered themselves what she was like .

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"Yes she should.

He had the right to know he's going to be a father.

Your posts are becoming increasingly more and more anti men. I think it's sad

I'd noticed that too

how is this anti men? hate it when people ruin my topics with bullshit but i wanna know now.

you're both looking like the MRA tbh.

What does MRA stand for?

As for the ghosting, it depends how serious the couple were. A one night stand and he then disappears. Well, that must happen practically every day of the week.

Being a father and being a partner are two separate things and he may have been an arse as a partner but could be a fantastic father."

MRA = mens rights activists, the ones who turn womens issues into men issues and it's to control women and not to gain rights for men.

anti-men doesn't mean that at all, it means you don't like men. i've had a lot of fun this week chatting to them on the forum so don't get where you've both seen me being anti-men everywhere.

thanks for the rest of your reply though, that was what i wanted.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

actually i'm not sure what you meant by anti-men now, i think it was a dig at me but seeing as you've said otherwise idk. plus the sad face makes me think you wasn't being malicious, but i'm not anti-men.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Yes she should.

He had the right to know he's going to be a father.

Your posts are becoming increasingly more and more anti men. I think it's sad

I'd noticed that too

how is this anti men? hate it when people ruin my topics with bullshit but i wanna know now.

you're both looking like the MRA tbh.

What does MRA stand for?

As for the ghosting, it depends how serious the couple were. A one night stand and he then disappears. Well, that must happen practically every day of the week.

Being a father and being a partner are two separate things and he may have been an arse as a partner but could be a fantastic father.

MRA = mens rights activists, the ones who turn womens issues into men issues and it's to control women and not to gain rights for men.

anti-men doesn't mean that at all, it means you don't like men. i've had a lot of fun this week chatting to them on the forum so don't get where you've both seen me being anti-men everywhere.

thanks for the rest of your reply though, that was what i wanted.

Oh god, I'm definitely no men's rights activist

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think he has a right to know, and moreover he has a responsibility to pay towards the child's upkeep/upbringing. But I could quite understand if a woman didn't want anything more to do with him, in those circumstances.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"actually i'm not sure what you meant by anti-men now, i think it was a dig at me but seeing as you've said otherwise idk. plus the sad face makes me think you wasn't being malicious, but i'm not anti-men.

I wasn't being malicious, I like you.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"Yes she should.

He had the right to know he's going to be a father.

Your posts are becoming increasingly more and more anti men. I think it's sad

I'd noticed that too

how is this anti men? hate it when people ruin my topics with bullshit but i wanna know now.

you're both looking like the MRA tbh.

What does MRA stand for?

As for the ghosting, it depends how serious the couple were. A one night stand and he then disappears. Well, that must happen practically every day of the week.

Being a father and being a partner are two separate things and he may have been an arse as a partner but could be a fantastic father.

MRA = mens rights activists, the ones who turn womens issues into men issues and it's to control women and not to gain rights for men.

anti-men doesn't mean that at all, it means you don't like men. i've had a lot of fun this week chatting to them on the forum so don't get where you've both seen me being anti-men everywhere.

thanks for the rest of your reply though, that was what i wanted.

Oh god, I'm definitely no men's rights activist

it's a shame really coz MRA should be seen as positive really. they've totally got the wrong people signed up for their causes though.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

I wasn't being malicious, I like you.

ok i'm sorry, the anti-men thing did make me feel like a man hater.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Don't us guys give you enough to complain about us for, without hypothetical scenarios?

We need to up our game, lads... they're getting bored.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Women must ghost men too though?

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By *ancastermanMan over a year ago

carnforth

I wasn't being malicious, I like you.

ok i'm sorry, the anti-men thing did make me feel like a man hater."

I didn't take it as anti-men. Can't speak for other guys.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"Women must ghost men too though? "

yeah, i ghosted all my meets off here now, even the regular ones, i don't owe them anything. but i was just wondering about if a woman got ghosted then found out she was pregnant if she should bother contacting the guy.

i mean ghosting is the ultimate form of non-communication and because of that you have no social cues as to whether you should contact that person yourself or not, ghosting mostly suggests there is no point in contacting them as they have no interest in you so i was interested in what other people thought.

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By *imetoexplore69Couple over a year ago

Aberdeen

"ghosting means he just stops all contact, no interest in her or her well being.

well, say the guy fucked her and she got pregnant, she has ways to contact him. do you think she should?

i personally think no, coz he don't give a shit and doesn't deserve to be a part of her pregnancy, but wondering what reasoning others would have for their answer to this.

i'm sure this situation must arise on here.

"
of course he should.just because he has no interest In the woman dosent mean he is a bad person and has no morals or no interest in his child

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Nothing fucked up about what you're saying. Sounds ok to me

well you haven't stalked all my forum posts so you wouldn't know.

Oh ok! I will look out for more then! You're right about court, but should try mediation first and tell him there what he should be doing!

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"Nothing fucked up about what you're saying. Sounds ok to me

well you haven't stalked all my forum posts so you wouldn't know.

Oh ok! I will look out for more then! You're right about court, but should try mediation first and tell him there what he should be doing! "

don't really, i'm an embarrassment to myself.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

He's chosen to ghost the woman, not the hypothetical baby he's yet to know anything about.

"He doesn't want my pussy anymore so he doesn't deserve the chance of bringing up a child either" is a bit petty.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

no answers are right or wrong, will just mention that again. it is basically opinions and i wanted to see the reasoning behind peoples opinions too.

thanks all.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I've had a few of them over the last few months. I thought I'd chat to some men, allow them to be my friend and even added one to Kik. I was in an optimistic mood, but even so, still had that teensy bit of reserve about it.

Sure enough, Kik friend sent two messages then nothing. Friended ones were deleted this morning as they all failed off from conversing. I'm waiting to see if anyone messages asking why..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

As to the baby situation. If she's thinking of keeping it she should tell him. If not, then don't say anything.

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By *imetoexplore69Couple over a year ago

Aberdeen

"no answers are right or wrong, will just mention that again. it is basically opinions and i wanted to see the reasoning behind peoples opinions too.

thanks all."
I'm sorry but a woman thinking that she has a right to withhold a child because the guy has no interest in her is completely wrong and not an opinion.....in my opinion

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm very much of the opinion that a child has the right to have both parents in their life.

I see on a daily basis with my job so many mothers who see the child as THEIR child and not the fathers child.

That is wrong.

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By *imetoexplore69Couple over a year ago

Aberdeen

"As to the baby situation. If she's thinking of keeping it she should tell him. If not, then don't say anything. "
i can agree with that but then there is the whole is abortion murder or not. but think that's a bit heavy for this time in the morning lol.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"no answers are right or wrong, will just mention that again. it is basically opinions and i wanted to see the reasoning behind peoples opinions too.

thanks all.

I'm sorry but a woman thinking that she has a right to withhold a child because the guy has no interest in her is completely wrong and not an opinion.....in my opinion

i've withheld my oldest child from his dad because he never turned up for him when planned. it was causing my son distress and i thought the best alternative was to deny his dad access until he got his shit together (which he never did until my oldest was 17).

the above scenario is different to the OP, but after going through that once and seeing what it did to my son it would definitely affect my decision. sometimes we have to act based on experience, sometimes we think hiding things is the most beneficial option.

just depends. that's why there is no answer, everyone is going to base their reply on experience. i think so.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Yes she should.

He had the right to know he's going to be a father.

Your posts are becoming increasingly more and more anti men. I think it's sad

I'd noticed that too

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"As to the baby situation. If she's thinking of keeping it she should tell him. If not, then don't say anything. i can agree with that but then there is the whole is abortion murder or not. but think that's a bit heavy for this time in the morning lol."

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"no answers are right or wrong, will just mention that again. it is basically opinions and i wanted to see the reasoning behind peoples opinions too.

thanks all.

I'm sorry but a woman thinking that she has a right to withhold a child because the guy has no interest in her is completely wrong and not an opinion.....in my opinion

just depends. that's why there is no answer, everyone is going to base their reply on experience. i think so."

Without giving a man the chance to see his child he can't not turn up. You can't know if he's going to want to be part of the child's life if you don't tell him.

I wouldn't have told my child they were seeing their dad until he knocked on the door. That way their would be no being let down.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"no answers are right or wrong, will just mention that again. it is basically opinions and i wanted to see the reasoning behind peoples opinions too.

thanks all.

I'm sorry but a woman thinking that she has a right to withhold a child because the guy has no interest in her is completely wrong and not an opinion.....in my opinion

just depends. that's why there is no answer, everyone is going to base their reply on experience. i think so.

Without giving a man the chance to see his child he can't not turn up. You can't know if he's going to want to be part of the child's life if you don't tell him.

I wouldn't have told my child they were seeing their dad until he knocked on the door. That way their would be no being let down. "

naively, i still am naive sadly but not as stupid now, i used to get him ready thinking his dad would turn up. even more so after he took me to court for access.

i agree without giving someone a chance you don't know. sometimes caution might affect your decision, sometimes knowing you can't trust your choices might, all kinds of things can influence.

i like how you're getting me thinking though.

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By *imetoexplore69Couple over a year ago

Aberdeen

"no answers are right or wrong, will just mention that again. it is basically opinions and i wanted to see the reasoning behind peoples opinions too.

thanks all.

I'm sorry but a woman thinking that she has a right to withhold a child because the guy has no interest in her is completely wrong and not an opinion.....in my opinion

just depends. that's why there is no answer, everyone is going to base their reply on experience. i think so."
I agree with you in regards to some guys being wasters etc and can see your reason for doing so but that is completely different from witholding a child just because the guy dosent like you and that would be 100% wrong no ifs or buts.I must say i agree with others you do seem to have a bit of a chip on your shoulder regarding guys.do you think it could be casual sex and the thought of being used that makes you feel this way? Sorry if that if that is a bit deep oit'sr personel its just iv seen you around the forums for a long time and you seem a decent person and i agree with what you say alot but recently you seem to be hating all guys for some reason.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"no answers are right or wrong, will just mention that again. it is basically opinions and i wanted to see the reasoning behind peoples opinions too.

thanks all.

I'm sorry but a woman thinking that she has a right to withhold a child because the guy has no interest in her is completely wrong and not an opinion.....in my opinion

just depends. that's why there is no answer, everyone is going to base their reply on experience. i think so.I agree with you in regards to some guys being wasters etc and can see your reason for doing so but that is completely different from witholding a child just because the guy dosent like you and that would be 100% wrong no ifs or buts.I must say i agree with others you do seem to have a bit of a chip on your shoulder regarding guys.do you think it could be casual sex and the thought of being used that makes you feel this way? Sorry if that if that is a bit deep oit'sr personel its just iv seen you around the forums for a long time and you seem a decent person and i agree with what you say alot but recently you seem to be hating all guys for some reason."

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By *imetoexplore69Couple over a year ago

Aberdeen

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. "
laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"no answers are right or wrong, will just mention that again. it is basically opinions and i wanted to see the reasoning behind peoples opinions too.

thanks all.

I'm sorry but a woman thinking that she has a right to withhold a child because the guy has no interest in her is completely wrong and not an opinion.....in my opinion

just depends. that's why there is no answer, everyone is going to base their reply on experience. i think so."

I can see why you withheld your oldest child from his dad. You gave him the choice to be a dad and he didn't take it. You put your child first. I would have done the same

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"there's no right or wrong answer, thanks both.

"
There is ........... Its your body and what you do with your body is up to you .. That's how I see it.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"no answers are right or wrong, will just mention that again. it is basically opinions and i wanted to see the reasoning behind peoples opinions too.

thanks all.

I'm sorry but a woman thinking that she has a right to withhold a child because the guy has no interest in her is completely wrong and not an opinion.....in my opinion

just depends. that's why there is no answer, everyone is going to base their reply on experience. i think so.

I can see why you withheld your oldest child from his dad. You gave him the choice to be a dad and he didn't take it. You put your child first. I would have done the same

thanks, most people do it, not at first but when they see the damage that's being caused they act upon it.

i was more pointing out that it's not to do with the guy not being interested in the woman exactly, that's partially why someone might think he wouldn't be interested in his kid with her really. but if you've already chosen one dead beat then something to consider is maybe you chose another one.

it's been a good conversation really, i need to think of examples not to do with myself though haha.

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

Hypothetical questions like this are great for making one think around a possible problem.

I've never been ghosted by anyone I cared about.

The problem is that whether hypothetically or actually one has no real idea of the consequences of ones decisions. Not telling the ghoster might mean a child is deprived of a great father or a woman deprived of great support while she goes through a termination or it might mean both child and woman avoided a whole heap of trouble. I'm a great believer in doing nothing and let the universe work it out.

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By *FFB69Woman over a year ago

Torfaen/Gwent

"that's not usually true about the stalker thing though, it's sad to see a woman being blamed when she's already been dumped on.

sometimes people get too attached and ghost, they're cheating so ghost, or they're just dickheads who don't care and so ghost.

So you admit to being mentally/emotionally abusive yourself then?

You come across as thinking if a guy ghosts a woman he's an arsehole, must be cheating or some other reason. But then admit to doing the exact same thing yourself?

So do you think ghosting is perfectly acceptable or do you think its only done by "dickheads who don't care"?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don't like the ghost thing it gives me the creeps . If people don't wish to know me I don't wish to know them .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It's the old adage of one size doesn't fit all.

I ghosted someone once. I firmly truly believed it was the best thing to do which would give a clear message in the complex situation. But I watched continuously from afar to see they were ok and it drove me insane!!

Yes it can be horrid, but as stated above there's circumstances where it may be the best solution.

To assume it's abuse isn't appropriate in all situations.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"that's not usually true about the stalker thing though, it's sad to see a woman being blamed when she's already been dumped on.

sometimes people get too attached and ghost, they're cheating so ghost, or they're just dickheads who don't care and so ghost.

So you admit to being mentally/emotionally abusive yourself then?

You come across as thinking if a guy ghosts a woman he's an arsehole, must be cheating or some other reason. But then admit to doing the exact same thing yourself?

So do you think ghosting is perfectly acceptable or do you think its only done by "dickheads who don't care"?

well yeah, i saw no commitment or consistency from them at all so i just ghosted them. i think it's fine to do that. that seems to be how NSA is on here going off how i've been treated.

and i don't care, they don't care about me so why should i care about them? that is exactly how NSA has been for me, i'm cool with that. not like we ever spoke unless they wanted sexually servicing, i owe them nothing at all. i'm a changed person, used to be nice to anyone, never got the same in return so changed. i changed into the dickhead that everyone else is, yes. took a break then again i've changed now and want more than NSA coz it doesn't suit me.

there's nothing wrong with NSA either, it's just not for me any more and any guy interacting with me gets told that.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol."

Are you male or female?

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

" It's the old adage of one size doesn't fit all.

Yes it can be horrid, but as stated above there's circumstances where it may be the best solution.

To assume it's abuse isn't appropriate in all situations."

yeah if it's for your own safety i can understand that. here's the thing, it's not called ghosting if you're doing it against an abuser, it's then called no contact.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"I don't like the ghost thing it gives me the creeps . If people don't wish to know me I don't wish to know them ."

exactly why i sacked off most guys on here, they do it a lot. and i make it clear i don't want NSA now to anyone new i chat to. being just friends is fine too.

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By *eesideMan over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea

If a guy stops contact just cos sumone has got pregnant. then i wood say no don't contact them as anyone Hoo dus things like that (in my vue) is not fit to be a parent.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" It's the old adage of one size doesn't fit all.

Yes it can be horrid, but as stated above there's circumstances where it may be the best solution.

To assume it's abuse isn't appropriate in all situations.

yeah if it's for your own safety i can understand that. here's the thing, it's not called ghosting if you're doing it against an abuser, it's then called no contact."

In abusive situations you're quite right to cut contact.

What I've learnt is that humans are funny old things though. Sometimes we remain silent in the hope others will make the contact. Sometimes all we can and shoukd do is concentrate in how we behave...it may influence others. If it doesn't....well that's out of our hands sadly.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

" It's the old adage of one size doesn't fit all.

Yes it can be horrid, but as stated above there's circumstances where it may be the best solution.

To assume it's abuse isn't appropriate in all situations.

yeah if it's for your own safety i can understand that. here's the thing, it's not called ghosting if you're doing it against an abuser, it's then called no contact.

In abusive situations you're quite right to cut contact.

that's true.

i think when the consistency changes dramatically though we can presume ghosted.

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

"thanks both.

ghosting is also a type of mental abuse, does that change anyones opinion?"

I didn't know what ghosting was until you said it...how can cutting off contact with someone who you don't want to speak to anymore mental abuse?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" It's the old adage of one size doesn't fit all.

Yes it can be horrid, but as stated above there's circumstances where it may be the best solution.

To assume it's abuse isn't appropriate in all situations.

yeah if it's for your own safety i can understand that. here's the thing, it's not called ghosting if you're doing it against an abuser, it's then called no contact.

In abusive situations you're quite right to cut contact.

that's true.

i think when the consistency changes dramatically though we can presume ghosted."

Probably. You have a choice. Make a step towards or simply let things take a course. Careful how they affect you emotionally though.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don't think ghosting on here is the same thing unless you've met each other a number of times and then one person goes quiet.

I think that's bloody rude.

In the real world, where a relationship has been established, then I think ghosting is totally wrong.

I think some men are not good at saying they're no longer interested. They think it's nicer to not say anything rather than tell someone they don't want to see them again. Cowards is what they are.

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

"Not telling him she is pregnant with his child is an even worse form of mental abuse I think . Although I like most wouldn't see "Ghosting" as mental abuse .

(him)

it's form of abandonment. that is why it's considered abuse.

I see you answered here.

I would say adults should get a grip if they think they are being abused because someone doesn't want to contact them again

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"thanks both.

ghosting is also a type of mental abuse, does that change anyones opinion?

I didn't know what ghosting was until you said it...how can cutting off contact with someone who you don't want to speak to anymore mental abuse?"

it's abandonment of a person who doesn't know they've been abandoned at first. and they can't move on until it's sunk in.

ghosting and the silent treatment are forms of emotional abuse because they don't let the other person know what's going on and can keep them in a state of confusion or worry or even thinking they've done something wrong when they haven't.

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

"Don't us guys give you enough to complain about us for, without hypothetical scenarios?

We need to up our game, lads... they're getting bored."

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

The baby thing...if she is keeping it I think he has the right to know, even if he then decides not to have anything to do with it

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

"thanks both.

ghosting is also a type of mental abuse, does that change anyones opinion?

I didn't know what ghosting was until you said it...how can cutting off contact with someone who you don't want to speak to anymore mental abuse?

it's abandonment of a person who doesn't know they've been abandoned at first. and they can't move on until it's sunk in.

Surely an Adult can figure that out when they havn't been in touch for a while. Surely the persons pride should kick in and say stuff you I am moving on if you don't want to know me when it is so obvious?

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By *imetoexplore69Couple over a year ago

Aberdeen

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol.

Are you male or female?"
Would your answear be different if you new which was posting?Would be interesting to hear your thoughts on this.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol."

So you don't like the laws of our land. Well tough! If you don't abide by them, then pay the consequences. Thankfully our country permits abortion, otherwise we'd go back to the days of back street abortionists and women's lives in danger.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It interests me how many "dads" there are out there who don't know that they have children.

Imho if she is going to have an abortion then that's her right and she shouldn't worry about telling the male. But if she wants to keep the child then he has the right to know.

Some men don't care if they have children or not.

Some men do.

If it was me... id have an abortion.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol.

Are you male or female? Would your answear be different if you new which was posting?Would be interesting to hear your thoughts on this."

Actually no, which is why i went on to respond as i did. I, many years ago before i gained many life experiences, thought of it as murdering a baby, but soon learned that other factors must be considered. Hence, pro choice.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

"thanks both.

ghosting is also a type of mental abuse, does that change anyones opinion?

I didn't know what ghosting was until you said it...how can cutting off contact with someone who you don't want to speak to anymore mental abuse?

it's abandonment of a person who doesn't know they've been abandoned at first. and they can't move on until it's sunk in.

if she was having his baby that could make it harder.

but yeah they get the message eventually obviously, it;s just while they were waiting to get that messages they were not moving on, possibly worrying something had happened to the person, or wondering what they have done to be ignored?

people can mess with their own heads so easily when others start the ball rolling, i think so.

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By *imetoexplore69Couple over a year ago

Aberdeen

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol.

"
or you could ya know just be responsible then no killing is necessary.contraception has came a long way since the days of back street abortion

and yes I do believe alot of laws are bullshit.If me using my own brain, conscience and common sense and you know, just doing what I feel is right instead of following what a load of white guys in suits tell me what to do and think and that makes you think I'm some sort of rouge that lives life on the edge then more fool you to be honast.for instance I bet you have played the happy birthday tune at a kids party before.well guess what, you are a rouge like me who has just broken the law

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By *imetoexplore69Couple over a year ago

Aberdeen

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol.

Are you male or female? Would your answear be different if you new which was posting?Would be interesting to hear your thoughts on this.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If a guy stops contact just cos sumone has got pregnant. then i wood say no don't contact them as anyone Hoo dus things like that (in my vue) is not fit to be a parent."

You can't know that. He may have no feelings towards the mother but love his child. It's part of him too.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol.

Are you male or female? Would your answear be different if you new which was posting?Would be interesting to hear your thoughts on this.

One factor is it isn't a sentient being. You're not murdering a human, you're terminating it so it doesn't become a human.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol.

or you could ya know just be responsible then no killing is necessary.contraception has came a long way since the days of back street abortion

Obeying laws is not being forced to think in a certain way

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol.

Are you male or female? Would your answear be different if you new which was posting?Would be interesting to hear your thoughts on this.

Medical (physical and psychological), age of the mother ( linked to medical), origin of pregnancy (two of the things we cannot mention on fab), support (lack of).

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol.

Are you male or female? Would your answear be different if you new which was posting?Would be interesting to hear your thoughts on this.

Medical (physical and psychological), age of the mother ( linked to medical), origin of pregnancy (two of the things we cannot mention on fab), support (lack of). "

Having had an amniocentesis, i had two weeks to think about on what circumstances i would abort my planned and wanted baby. I had decided that if there was evidence my baby would come into this world only to physically suffer and with a limited lifespan, I'd feel compelled to abort.

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By *DontExist OP Woman over a year ago

•+• Silicon valley. •+•

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol.

or you could ya know just be responsible then no killing is necessary.contraception has came a long way since the days of back street abortion

it's ok. you can believe it's murder to kill an embryo or featus. it possibly is murder, depends how you look at it.

people don't usually make the decision to abort lightly so don't really need guilt tripping over it too.

some people who abort believe they are killing their child also. even the law isn't so stupid as to think a feotus/embryo isn't going to become a human but because the responsibility for that potential person is in the hands of those who created it then they also give them the right to terminate that 'child' if they choose to do that. it's legal here and accepted and most people don't make the choice lightly.

half of these babies were wanted but were aborted because they have defects that will give them poor quality of life or death anyway. some are aborted because it's not safe for the mother to continue her pregnancy.

contraception does fail also, some people just don't think before they have sex. none of them should be punished for enjoying sex i reckon.

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By *imetoexplore69Couple over a year ago

Aberdeen

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol.

or you could ya know just be responsible then no killing is necessary.contraception has came a long way since the days of back street abortion

Obeying laws is not being forced to think in a certain way

. "
of course it is.not following a law then gives and forces the impression you must be wrong and not thinking or conforming the "right way", when infact it is far more complicated but ushally reverts back to money or alterier motives.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol.

or you could ya know just be responsible then no killing is necessary.contraception has came a long way since the days of back street abortion

Obeying laws is not being forced to think in a certain way

. of course it is.not following a law then gives and forces the impression you must be wrong and not thinking or conforming the "right way", when infact it is far more complicated but ushally reverts back to money or alterier motives."

Of course it's not. It's being urged to act in a certain way but you can still think the law is an ass. Your logic is extremely flawed.

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By *imetoexplore69Couple over a year ago

Aberdeen

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol.

Are you male or female? Would your answear be different if you new which was posting?Would be interesting to hear your thoughts on this.

Medical (physical and psychological), age of the mother ( linked to medical), origin of pregnancy (two of the things we cannot mention on fab), support (lack of). "
reading between the lines then yea I agree with you.I'm thinking more along the lines of non use or failing of contraception.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What if the woman tricked the man into getting her pregnant.

Like she told him she was on the pill (yes, he should have insisted on condoms but let's pretend for arguments sake he didn't)

Would he then have the right to insist she terminates the pregnancy?

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By *egasus NobMan over a year ago

Merton

Does he know she's pregnant? was the unborn kid planned? Did they use protection? were there in a relationship or one off? so many questions

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By *imetoexplore69Couple over a year ago

Aberdeen

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol.

or you could ya know just be responsible then no killing is necessary.contraception has came a long way since the days of back street abortion

Obeying laws is not being forced to think in a certain way

Of course it's not. It's being urged to act in a certain way but you can still think the law is an ass. Your logic is extremely flawed."
its not being urged its being forced,completely diffrent.put it this way.If you were told someone was breaking the law you would "think" they where in the wrong simply because you have been conditioned to do so.on a side note I am enjoying this discussion while skiving at work and being mildly autistic I know I can come across a bit straight to the point and forceing logic to situations that ushally have some sort of etticate behind them so sorry if I come across rude.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What if the woman tricked the man into getting her pregnant.

Like she told him she was on the pill (yes, he should have insisted on condoms but let's pretend for arguments sake he didn't)

Would he then have the right to insist she terminates the pregnancy?"

Any man can insist just as any woman doesn't have to comply.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

this basically is a twist on the abortion argument. except this time the child also has rights to consider, making it more confusing.

the father has no rights until after the birth as the child is not in his body.

i would say both parents have responsibilities but the guy obviously feels none towards the woman, also but his child is not the woman.

Whether someone calls abortion murder or not it's not illegal and it's the woman's choice. It doesn't seem fair, not letting the father have a say, but he doesn't have to carry the child and hand it over, after a birth, if she doesn't think she can look after it. laws are written by people genrelly considered liers and thieves so I don't let laws dictate to me which is wrong or right.You do seem to miss the point though.It's not about the guys or girls right to abort its about the right of the human growing inside of the woman which nobody has the right to murder weather a law tells u it's ok or not.just because a woman is irosposible dosent give them the right to kill someone.If that applied to outside the womb I would be a serial killer lol.

or you could ya know just be responsible then no killing is necessary.contraception has came a long way since the days of back street abortion

Obeying laws is not being forced to think in a certain way

Of course it's not. It's being urged to act in a certain way but you can still think the law is an ass. Your logic is extremely flawed.

its not being urged its being forced,completely diffrent.put it this way.If you were told someone was breaking the law you would "think" they where in the wrong simply because you have been conditioned to do so.on a side note I am enjoying this discussion while skiving at work and being mildly autistic I know I can come across a bit straight to the point and forceing logic to situations that ushally have some sort of etticate behind them so sorry if I come across rude."

The law can be enforced but it is not forced. Stealing is illegal but if you get away with it, how is the law forced upon you? You chose to act against the law. However, if you get caught, you then pay the consequences.

What we think of others breaking the law is down to us. Laws change throughout history and culture, so actually, I'm not personally conditioned to think anyone is wrong just cos of the present laws.