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Women having a dump in the sand dunes.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Today I've been on a beach in Wales. I was having a swim when I saw a woman walking towards the sand dunes I knew she was going for a dump by the way she tentatively looked around whilst clenching her cheeks and tummy.
So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and ......PLEASE FILL IN THE BLANK.
This is an attempt to break the internet and proove that not all old white guys collect piss stained sand.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Today I've been on a beach in Wales. I was having a swim when I saw a woman walking towards the sand dunes I knew she was going for a dump by the way she tentatively looked around whilst clenching her cheeks and tummy.
So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and ......PLEASE FILL IN THE BLANK.
This is an attempt to break the internet and proove that not all old white guys collect piss stained sand. "
you really took offence to that  |
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"
So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and ......PLEASE FILL IN THE BLANK.
"
.... Gently kicked sand over it, until it was totaly buried.
Don't want any small children running through a pile of poop. |
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"Today I've been on a beach in Wales. I was having a swim when I saw a woman walking towards the sand dunes I knew she was going for a dump by the way she tentatively looked around whilst clenching her cheeks and tummy.
So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and ......PLEASE FILL IN THE BLANK.
This is an attempt to break the internet and proove that not all old white guys collect piss stained sand.
you really took offence to that "
He's old ya know. Wounded. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and ...... polished her turds until they turned into diamonds. "
You should work for Disney |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Today I've been on a beach in Wales. I was having a swim when I saw a woman walking towards the sand dunes I knew she was going for a dump by the way she tentatively looked around whilst clenching her cheeks and tummy.
So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and ......PLEASE FILL IN THE BLANK.
This is an attempt to break the internet and proove that not all old white guys collect piss stained sand.
you really took offence to that "
yup...i keep sniffing myself and thinking of deleting my account now I know how I'm perceived  |
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"Today I've been on a beach in Wales. I was having a swim when I saw a woman walking towards the sand dunes I knew she was going for a dump by the way she tentatively looked around whilst clenching her cheeks and tummy.
So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and ......PLEASE FILL IN THE BLANK.
This is an attempt to break the internet and proove that not all old white guys collect piss stained sand.
you really took offence to that "
We all did ya $#@&€  |
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"So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and ...... polished her turds until they turned into diamonds.
You should work for Disney"
Hmmmmm Mickey mouse wants me to but Walt Dis Nay
BOOM! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and ...... polished her turds until they turned into diamonds.
You should work for Disney
Hmmmmm Mickey mouse wants me to but Walt Dis Nay
BOOM! "
FFS...picks the turd up and eats it to dull the pain |
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...as I went to inspect it closer and have a good sniff, the woman had appeared behind me and caught me red handed.
Splatt!
She pushed the back of my head towards the well constructed stool. 'Have a closer look ya filthy bastard' she shrieked, before she ran off back to her towel. Leaving me with sand stuck to my face and unwanted attention of someone's golden retriever. |
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"So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and ...... polished her turds until they turned into diamonds.
You should work for Disney
Hmmmmm Mickey mouse wants me to but Walt Dis Nay
BOOM!
FFS...picks the turd up and eats it to dull the pain "
You'll need turdofen extra to get over that one. I'm still cringing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Today I've been on a beach in Wales. I was having a swim when I saw a woman walking towards the sand dunes I knew she was going for a dump by the way she tentatively looked around whilst clenching her cheeks and tummy.
So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and "
scooped it up in a goodly amount of sand, ran up behind the dirty cow and splatted it on her head screaming 'THE TOILETS OVER THERE YA SCUMMY MUMMY' I then kicked sand in her husbands face and after washing my hands went back to drinking XXXX and dreaming of kylie.... doin a piss in the sand.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"...as I went to inspect it closer and have a good sniff, the woman had appeared behind me and caught me red handed.
Splatt!
She pushed the back of my head towards the well constructed stool. 'Have a closer look ya filthy bastard' she shrieked, before she ran off back to her towel. Leaving me with sand stuck to my face and unwanted attention of someone's golden retriever. "
You are definitely contributing to breaking the internet |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and ...... polished her turds until they turned into diamonds.
You should work for Disney
Hmmmmm Mickey mouse wants me to but Walt Dis Nay
BOOM!
FFS...picks the turd up and eats it to dull the pain
You'll need turdofen extra to get over that one. I'm still cringing."
I just realised I'm allergic to nuts....kiss of life anyone? didn't think so |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and ...... polished her turds until they turned into diamonds.
You should work for Disney
Hmmmmm Mickey mouse wants me to but Walt Dis Nay
BOOM!
FFS...picks the turd up and eats it to dull the pain
You'll need turdofen extra to get over that one. I'm still cringing.
I just realised I'm allergic to nuts....kiss of life anyone? didn't think so "
Guess it's a shitty situation |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Today I've been on a beach in Wales. I was having a swim when I saw a woman walking towards the sand dunes I knew she was going for a dump by the way she tentatively looked around whilst clenching her cheeks and tummy.
So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and ......PLEASE FILL IN THE BLANK.
This is an attempt to break the internet and proove that not all old white guys collect piss stained sand. "
Does piss actually leave a stain in sand though?... Yet another question that I refuse to Google for the answer. |
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"Today I've been on a beach in Wales. I was having a swim when I saw a woman walking towards the sand dunes I knew she was going for a dump by the way she tentatively looked around whilst clenching her cheeks and tummy.
So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and ......PLEASE FILL IN THE BLANK.
This is an attempt to break the internet and proove that not all old white guys collect piss stained sand.
Does piss actually leave a stain in sand though?... Yet another question that I refuse to Google for the answer."
Who lives near a beach that could try..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Today I've been on a beach in Wales. I was having a swim when I saw a woman walking towards the sand dunes I knew she was going for a dump by the way she tentatively looked around whilst clenching her cheeks and tummy.
So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and ......PLEASE FILL IN THE BLANK.
This is an attempt to break the internet and proove that not all old white guys collect piss stained sand. "
....vowed never to eat sweetcorn ever again
Xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Today I've been on a beach in Wales. I was having a swim when I saw a woman walking towards the sand dunes I knew she was going for a dump by the way she tentatively looked around whilst clenching her cheeks and tummy.
So I shot out of the water keeping an eye on where she went and I found the said item in the sand. I knelt down and ......PLEASE FILL IN THE BLANK.
This is an attempt to break the internet and proove that not all old white guys collect piss stained sand.
Does piss actually leave a stain in sand though?... Yet another question that I refuse to Google for the answer."
Not sure about piss staining sand, but I've always known never to eat yellow snow! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Ok ok the original OP (taking the piss thread) may have erred in his verbosity but he has a kink ..............don't we all?"
You're quite right. However maybe his anecdote could have been written more gracefully. It did temporarily break the part of the internet that is FAB...funny though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ok ok the original OP (taking the piss thread) may have erred in his verbosity but he has a kink ..............don't we all?
You're quite right. However maybe his anecdote could have been written more gracefully. It did temporarily break the part of the internet that is FAB...funny though "
I suppose the fact that he is a man of some years makes him a target for fun ( I did so myself) but as I say ..........we are all weird! |
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