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I need a non biased / opinion
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's Sunday so can't speak to anyone at scocial unless it emergency
It's s long story, face to face is better. "
It's highly unlikely somebody is going to meet you face to face based on a forum request. If you want advice then spill the beans and you'll get it on here.  |
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"Mediation.
Yeah thanks not
This is the life of my child not a ducking joke"
so you would turn up your nose at the idea of medication in favour of randomly meeting a stranger of a swinging site to discuss it  |
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By *DontExistWoman
over a year ago
•+• Silicon valley. •+• |
"It's Sunday so can't speak to anyone at scocial unless it emergency
It's s long story, face to face is better.
It's highly unlikely somebody is going to meet you face to face based on a forum request. If you want advice then spill the beans and you'll get it on here. "
this.
especially not now he's been rude to one reply already.
OP, i know this stuff can be frustrating but try not to take it out on the people you're asking to help you. |
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"It's Sunday so can't speak to anyone at scocial unless it emergency
It's s long story, face to face is better.
It's highly unlikely somebody is going to meet you face to face based on a forum request. If you want advice then spill the beans and you'll get it on here.
this.
especially not now he's been rude to one reply already.
OP, i know this stuff can be frustrating but try not to take it out on the people you're asking to help you."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Mediation.
Yeah thanks not
This is the life of my child not a ducking jokeso you would turn up your nose at the idea of medication in favour of randomly meeting a stranger of a swinging site to discuss it "
I was thinking that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The point is ....its your child.
Mediation is there to try and resolve the situation without the need for your child to be any more torn apart emotionally by the situation what ever it may be.
Do not put your own interests anger frustrations or whatever ahead of the needs of your child.
And don't expect random strangers on a swingers site to solve your problems. That's why mediation and the children's courts eye exist
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think the OP mistook mediation for meditation, however given his arsey response maybe he should indulge in the latter before trying the former.
Serious advice? Don't ask for advice from a sex site, try CAB website. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"I was just hoping that there might be a few singles parents on here that might have gone through this. No one i know in real would has had this happen.
No worries thanks anyway "
Gone through what? No single person is going to leave their child alone to meet you if they don't know why. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Please do look for professional advice. I have legal friends in family law and too often they find clients think they know the Law based on widely inaccurate soap episodes. |
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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
"I was just hoping that there might be a few singles parents on here that might have gone through this. No one i know in real would has had this happen.
No worries thanks anyway "
We can't help without more details . Enough of us have been through the court system over our children but each case is different and the child's views come into account,depending on age of child. |
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Seriously it would take hours to write it all I have a 3" thick wod of paper work about it. Hence me waning a face to face but understandably this wasn't the right place to ask
Sorry to rant I'm just lost
Thanks again to you all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You need specialist advice. Also, if anyone on here can give *relevant* experience advice, it will be another single guy."
Why would it be another single guy ?
Why couldn't it be a single woman?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is is a bit different for the guy. Woman have the control in the eyes of the law mostly "
No longer the case...but it still takes two parents to come to an agreement on what is best for their child/children.
If it can be resolved out of court and then just agreed by the legal system it's better for everyone including the children.
They are our future not a bargaining chip to be fought over..
Two people created them...the same two people will always be responsible for the child's welfare...
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"You need specialist advice. Also, if anyone on here can give *relevant* experience advice, it will be another single guy.
Why would it be another single guy ?
Why couldn't it be a single woman?
"
I don't have personal experience. But every time it's written about here or in the news, the issues for the man and the woman are very different, with most custody going to the woman.
I'm not making an issue of that, just saying the experience of another man would be most relevant to him. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is is a bit different for the guy. Woman have the control in the eyes of the law mostly
No longer the case...but it still takes two parents to come to an agreement on what is best for their child/children.
If it can be resolved out of court and then just agreed by the legal system it's better for everyone including the children.
They are our future not a bargaining chip to be fought over..
Two people created them...the same two people will always be responsible for the child's welfare...
"
Very much still the case. If a woman doesn't want to come to an agreement, a man's only option is to take them to court, if a man is working, (as in my case) this is extremely expensive and not an option for people on a low wage. Woman wins, man is fucked over yet again. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is is a bit different for the guy. Woman have the control in the eyes of the law mostly
No longer the case...but it still takes two parents to come to an agreement on what is best for their child/children.
If it can be resolved out of court and then just agreed by the legal system it's better for everyone including the children.
They are our future not a bargaining chip to be fought over..
Two people created them...the same two people will always be responsible for the child's welfare...
Very much still the case. If a woman doesn't want to come to an agreement, a man's only option is to take them to court, if a man is working, (as in my case) this is extremely expensive and not an option for people on a low wage. Woman wins, man is fucked over yet again."
If someone is on a low wage, they can apply to get help with the fees. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is is a bit different for the guy. Woman have the control in the eyes of the law mostly
No longer the case...but it still takes two parents to come to an agreement on what is best for their child/children.
If it can be resolved out of court and then just agreed by the legal system it's better for everyone including the children.
They are our future not a bargaining chip to be fought over..
Two people created them...the same two people will always be responsible for the child's welfare...
Very much still the case. If a woman doesn't want to come to an agreement, a man's only option is to take them to court, if a man is working, (as in my case) this is extremely expensive and not an option for people on a low wage. Woman wins, man is fucked over yet again."
Is woman wins man fucked over again really anything other than still considering a battle by proxy rather than what is best for the children?
As the poster below points out there are financial and other support mechanisms and this is not supposed to be a battle about winning or losing...
It's what's best for the children.
I am not having a pop...i know nothing of anyone's personal circumstances here..
But...
Mediation is better than a court imposed solution..
And
The courts and children's welfare system is more male friendly than its ever been in the past... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is is a bit different for the guy. Woman have the control in the eyes of the law mostly
No longer the case...but it still takes two parents to come to an agreement on what is best for their child/children.
If it can be resolved out of court and then just agreed by the legal system it's better for everyone including the children.
They are our future not a bargaining chip to be fought over..
Two people created them...the same two people will always be responsible for the child's welfare...
Very much still the case. If a woman doesn't want to come to an agreement, a man's only option is to take them to court, if a man is working, (as in my case) this is extremely expensive and not an option for people on a low wage. Woman wins, man is fucked over yet again.
If someone is on a low wage, they can apply to get help with the fees."
If contact is taking place, they wont fund a case to put an order in place, still giving the woman power over when and where the man gets access. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is is a bit different for the guy. Woman have the control in the eyes of the law mostly
No longer the case...but it still takes two parents to come to an agreement on what is best for their child/children.
If it can be resolved out of court and then just agreed by the legal system it's better for everyone including the children.
They are our future not a bargaining chip to be fought over..
Two people created them...the same two people will always be responsible for the child's welfare...
Very much still the case. If a woman doesn't want to come to an agreement, a man's only option is to take them to court, if a man is working, (as in my case) this is extremely expensive and not an option for people on a low wage. Woman wins, man is fucked over yet again.
Is woman wins man fucked over again really anything other than still considering a battle by proxy rather than what is best for the children?
As the poster below points out there are financial and other support mechanisms and this is not supposed to be a battle about winning or losing...
It's what's best for the children.
I am not having a pop...i know nothing of anyone's personal circumstances here..
But...
Mediation is better than a court imposed solution..
And
The courts and children's welfare system is more male friendly than its ever been in the past..."
Mediation only works if both parties are willing to talk. In my case my ex is unwilling to sit down and agree to an access agreement, court is only option, which as outlined above, isn't always practical. The system still allows women to play it if they so desire, and men miss out. Ultimatly, they hold the power, and if they don't want to play ball, unless your willing to spend thousands, your fucked. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is is a bit different for the guy. Woman have the control in the eyes of the law mostly
No longer the case...but it still takes two parents to come to an agreement on what is best for their child/children.
If it can be resolved out of court and then just agreed by the legal system it's better for everyone including the children.
They are our future not a bargaining chip to be fought over..
Two people created them...the same two people will always be responsible for the child's welfare...
Very much still the case. If a woman doesn't want to come to an agreement, a man's only option is to take them to court, if a man is working, (as in my case) this is extremely expensive and not an option for people on a low wage. Woman wins, man is fucked over yet again.
If someone is on a low wage, they can apply to get help with the fees.
If contact is taking place, they wont fund a case to put an order in place, still giving the woman power over when and where the man gets access."
Who won't fund the case? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is is a bit different for the guy. Woman have the control in the eyes of the law mostly
No longer the case...but it still takes two parents to come to an agreement on what is best for their child/children.
If it can be resolved out of court and then just agreed by the legal system it's better for everyone including the children.
They are our future not a bargaining chip to be fought over..
Two people created them...the same two people will always be responsible for the child's welfare...
Very much still the case. If a woman doesn't want to come to an agreement, a man's only option is to take them to court, if a man is working, (as in my case) this is extremely expensive and not an option for people on a low wage. Woman wins, man is fucked over yet again.
Is woman wins man fucked over again really anything other than still considering a battle by proxy rather than what is best for the children?
As the poster below points out there are financial and other support mechanisms and this is not supposed to be a battle about winning or losing...
It's what's best for the children.
I am not having a pop...i know nothing of anyone's personal circumstances here..
But...
Mediation is better than a court imposed solution..
And
The courts and children's welfare system is more male friendly than its ever been in the past...
Mediation only works if both parties are willing to talk. In my case my ex is unwilling to sit down and agree to an access agreement, court is only option, which as outlined above, isn't always practical. The system still allows women to play it if they so desire, and men miss out. Ultimatly, they hold the power, and if they don't want to play ball, unless your willing to spend thousands, your fucked."
You have to go through mediation before going to court. Even if it's only one party that goes. And women don't hold the power. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Been to mediation...tried to get legal aid, been though all these steps. Im talking from personal experiance from whats going on in my life right now, if a woman plays the game right, a guy has no chance unless he can fund a private case. Sorry for wasting all your time with my rants, i just see posts like this and it breaks my heart when i know what its like to have your kids used as weapons to hurt you, and miss your own flesh and blood. Sorry folks, much love to you all x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Been to mediation...tried to get legal aid, been though all these steps. Im talking from personal experiance from whats going on in my life right now, if a woman plays the game right, a guy has no chance unless he can fund a private case. Sorry for wasting all your time with my rants, i just see posts like this and it breaks my heart when i know what its like to have your kids used as weapons to hurt you, and miss your own flesh and blood. Sorry folks, much love to you all x"
Why do you need a solicitor. You can represent yourself. |
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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
"Is is a bit different for the guy. Woman have the control in the eyes of the law mostly
No longer the case...but it still takes two parents to come to an agreement on what is best for their child/children.
If it can be resolved out of court and then just agreed by the legal system it's better for everyone including the children.
They are our future not a bargaining chip to be fought over..
Two people created them...the same two people will always be responsible for the child's welfare...
Very much still the case. If a woman doesn't want to come to an agreement, a man's only option is to take them to court, if a man is working, (as in my case) this is extremely expensive and not an option for people on a low wage. Woman wins, man is fucked over yet again."
I didn't and I'm the female!! So sorry it didn't work for you but one of my kids now lives with their dad whose on the dole. It came down to the ' best school' |
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"Mediation.
Yeah thanks not
This is the life of my child not a ducking joke"
This is it is best not to ask these types of subjects in an open forum.
You will get some brilliant advice, but also not so good..... |
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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
"Mediation.
Yeah thanks not
This is the life of my child not a ducking joke
This is it is best not to ask these types of subjects in an open forum.
You will get some brilliant advice, but also not so good....."
this is sadly true |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Mediation.
Yeah thanks not
This is the life of my child not a ducking jokeso you would turn up your nose at the idea of medication in favour of randomly meeting a stranger of a swinging site to discuss it "
He possibly read it as meditation. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is is a bit different for the guy. Woman have the control in the eyes of the law mostly
No longer the case...but it still takes two parents to come to an agreement on what is best for their child/children.
If it can be resolved out of court and then just agreed by the legal system it's better for everyone including the children.
They are our future not a bargaining chip to be fought over..
Two people created them...the same two people will always be responsible for the child's welfare...
Very much still the case. If a woman doesn't want to come to an agreement, a man's only option is to take them to court, if a man is working, (as in my case) this is extremely expensive and not an option for people on a low wage. Woman wins, man is fucked over yet again."
Legal aid criteria has changed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Mediation.
Yeah thanks not
This is the life of my child not a ducking joke
It is legally recommended!"
It's a legal requirement, not just a recommendation. |
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"Is is a bit different for the guy. Woman have the control in the eyes of the law mostly
No longer the case...but it still takes two parents to come to an agreement on what is best for their child/children.
If it can be resolved out of court and then just agreed by the legal system it's better for everyone including the children.
They are our future not a bargaining chip to be fought over..
Two people created them...the same two people will always be responsible for the child's welfare...
Very much still the case. If a woman doesn't want to come to an agreement, a man's only option is to take them to court, if a man is working, (as in my case) this is extremely expensive and not an option for people on a low wage. Woman wins, man is fucked over yet again.
Legal aid criteria has changed."
People can also represent themselves, a friend of mine won custody of HIS kids through representing himself and te mother still qualified for legal aid at the time so had a solicitor. |
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The social was involved ( due to myself/ school) for two yeas, long and short they gave me unofficial custody with my daughter see her mother on my terms which work well tell now...
There is really way to much to write on here to give you enough information to make an informed judgment so yeah this was a bad place to ask advice
Thread closed I suppose
Thanks anyway |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Mediation.
Yeah thanks not
This is the life of my child not a ducking joke
It is legally recommended!
It's a legal requirement, not just a recommendation."
I should have put that it's recommended but a legal requirement should you want to pursue a court case.
Anyway, OP can contact child SS tomorrow. If they're already involved he may still have a case worker. |
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