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The outrageous lie thread...
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
I'm really a 21 year old, single bi sexual woman with a gym fit & tight body. You could crack a walnut with my arse cheeks.
The couple profile is a front, to keep down the messages.   |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't really enjoy meeting people for sex, it's just a way to get my foot in the door, to tell them about our holy saviour "
The Flying Spaghetti Monster? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have no dog ,,,,,,,,,, sorry pooch i didn't mean it , love you bud  |
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"I don't really enjoy meeting people for sex, it's just a way to get my foot in the door, to tell them about our holy saviour
The Flying Spaghetti Monster?"
Indeed, I bless the day I was touched by his noodly appendage. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When ever I felt down or lonley.
I would strip off and stand infront of the full length mirror and jump up and down.
I would look at my boobs bouncing and scream at myself-I LOVE YOU LAUREN AND I LOVE ALL MY WOBBLEY BITS.I LOVE ME I DOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
That's how I got banned from every ikea in the uk  x |
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"When ever I felt down or lonley.
I would strip off and stand infront of the full length mirror and jump up and down.
I would look at my boobs bouncing and scream at myself-I LOVE YOU LAUREN AND I LOVE ALL MY WOBBLEY BITS.I LOVE ME I DOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
That's how I got banned from every ikea in the uk x "
I believe all of that except the Ikea part, that bit was the lie  |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"When ever I felt down or lonley.
I would strip off and stand infront of the full length mirror and jump up and down.
I would look at my boobs bouncing and scream at myself-I LOVE YOU LAUREN AND I LOVE ALL MY WOBBLEY BITS.I LOVE ME I DOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
That's how I got banned from every ikea in the uk x "
oh that was comedy gold xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When ever I felt down or lonley.
I would strip off and stand infront of the full length mirror and jump up and down.
I would look at my boobs bouncing and scream at myself-I LOVE YOU LAUREN AND I LOVE ALL MY WOBBLEY BITS.I LOVE ME I DOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
That's how I got banned from every ikea in the uk x
I believe all of that except the Ikea part, that bit was the lie "
Ok it was really in dunhelm lol x |
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Our favourite porky pie
Is when single guys sent you a photo of themselves holding there cocks
And ther to dumb to think about the wedding ring there wearing
And then when ask they still maintain there single
It's just they carnt accomadate and can only meet daytime Monday to Friday
Lol really |
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"When ever I felt down or lonley.
I would strip off and stand infront of the full length mirror and jump up and down.
I would look at my boobs bouncing and scream at myself-I LOVE YOU LAUREN AND I LOVE ALL MY WOBBLEY BITS.I LOVE ME I DOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
That's how I got banned from every ikea in the uk x
I believe all of that except the Ikea part, that bit was the lie
Ok it was really in dunhelm lol x "
Do I get a prize? For seeing through your lies!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I thoroughly enjoyed being at work today - and love most of the people I work with.
They're not know it all condescending cunts at all!
I wish I lived with them so we could all be together ALL the time!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am really a 2ft midget who eats Maltesers all day "
I am employed by nestle to keep rabbits, who produce eco friendly maltesers.
I also have a sky remote as a penis. It was great initially, but I've now become so lazy I can't get up and make things happen.  |
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"I once worked for KP, cutting all the peanuts in half, with a tiny little hack saw.
I used to work at Warburtons, punching all the little holes in their crumpets."
Sounds better than my last job, knitting Shreddies for Nestle! |
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"I once worked for KP, cutting all the peanuts in half, with a tiny little hack saw.
I used to work at Warburtons, punching all the little holes in their crumpets.
Sounds better than my last job, knitting Shreddies for Nestle!"
I bet you were a hit with the nanna's (lie?) |
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"I once worked for KP, cutting all the peanits in half, with a tiny little hack saw.
I used to work at Warburtons, punching all the little holes in their crumpets.
Sounds better than my last job, knitting Shreddies for Nestle!
I bet you were a hit with the nanna's (lie?)"
Too right I was! You can keep your blonde hair and pumped up artificial lips.
I'm more into a blue rinse, a gummy smile and pimped up artificial hips!
(with 360 degree rotation functionality  )
Anyone fitting the bill, please get in touch and we could kick the evening off, with a bottle of sherry and a game of strip bingo.
(Not that I'm one to stereotype people) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My dad invented bacon and my mother holds the world record for being the youngest teenager in the world two years running
I commute to work in a helicopter gunship |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My dad invented bacon and my mother holds the world record for being the youngest teenager in the world two years running
I commute to work in a helicopter gunship "
Now this is a lie. Everyone knows you make bacon by rubbing two pigs together 
Fuzz |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My family came up with the original recipe for ice cubes, been handed down through the generation. The stuff you get out your freezer is just an imitation. |
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"I once worked for KP, cutting all the peanits in half, with a tiny little hack saw.
I used to work at Warburtons, punching all the little holes in their crumpets.
Sounds better than my last job, knitting Shreddies for Nestle!
I bet you were a hit with the nanna's (lie?)
Too right I was! You can keep your blonde hair and pumped up artificial lips.
I'm more into a blue rinse, a gummy smile and pimped up artificial hips!
(with 360 degree rotation functionality )
Anyone fitting the bill, please get in touch and we could kick the evening off, with a bottle of sherry and a game of strip bingo.
(Not that I'm one to stereotype people)"
Umm, whatever floats your boat fella, we all have our kinks. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I own a mansion ..have my own butler,housekeeper,maid
My chauffeur drives me everywhere in the top of the range tesla and have 20 acres of land which I keep my many horses on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I own a mansion ..have my own butler,housekeeper,maid
My chauffeur drives me everywhere in the top of the range tesla and have 20 acres of land which I keep my many horses on "
I know you.... lady Penelope, have you gotten rid of the custom Rolls Royce FAB1 ? |
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