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Not Relationship Material
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By *yldstyle OP Woman
over a year ago
A world of my own |
Following on from the dating bbw thread.
I know "relationship material" is a very dated and shallow turn of phrase. However we all have our own individual wants and needs. A virtual tick list of what you need or want. (Even if we think we dont)
So my question is what would stop you seeing someone as "relationship material"
No judging or bashing peoples views please!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I once dated a woman who was like a female version of me. We just ended up clashing and couldn't even remain friends so I wouldn't date someone so alike me again. Is that strange?  |
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By *yldstyle OP Woman
over a year ago
A world of my own |
"I once dated a woman who was like a female version of me. We just ended up clashing and couldn't even remain friends so I wouldn't date someone so alike me again. Is that strange? "
I think that makes sense. Opposites attract. You can then learn and evolve together. Both having the same wants, viewpoints and experiences could maybe be a little too predictable for me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I once dated a woman who was like a female version of me. We just ended up clashing and couldn't even remain friends so I wouldn't date someone so alike me again. Is that strange?
I think that makes sense. Opposites attract. You can then learn and evolve together. Both having the same wants, viewpoints and experiences could maybe be a little too predictable for me"
Spot on couldn't of put that better.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A woman who doesnt wear nice underwear is a deal breaker for me. Not saying she should be trussed up like a turkey in suspenders, but decent matching underwear is a must. I cant go the whole old tatty washed out pants and bras that are in bits because they are cumfy. Get nice new cumfy ones.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A woman who doesnt wear nice underwear is a deal breaker for me. Not saying she should be trussed up like a turkey in suspenders, but decent matching underwear is a must. I cant go the whole old tatty washed out pants and bras that are in bits because they are cumfy. Get nice new cumfy ones. "
Now for some strange reason...I would agree with that |
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"A woman who doesnt wear nice underwear is a deal breaker for me. Not saying she should be trussed up like a turkey in suspenders, but decent matching underwear is a must. "
Give me a man who doesn't give a stuff about matching underwear!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Someone who doesn't listen. I can be quite a deep thinker at times and i need to be able to express that and while I dont expect them to fully understand me Id really like them to at least accept what Im saying about how I feel. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Someone who doesn't listen. I can be quite a deep thinker at times and i need to be able to express that and while I dont expect them to fully understand me Id really like them to at least accept what Im saying about how I feel."
Sorry?... did you say something?...   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In a relationship character becomes paramount - so I would look for integrity, honesty, loyalty, faithfulness - all that kind of thing. "
have you considered a Labrador? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I once dated a woman who was like a female version of me. We just ended up clashing and couldn't even remain friends so I wouldn't date someone so alike me again. Is that strange? "
Not strange at all  |
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"In a relationship character becomes paramount - so I would look for integrity, honesty, loyalty, faithfulness - all that kind of thing.
have you considered a Labrador?"
I rather like men with the enthusiasm and sunny personality of a labrador puppy!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If someone had different values to me. Someone arrogant. If someone wasn't funny. Someone who didn't have a good moral compass and someone disrespectful. There's more I could add. Perhaps that's why I'm single. Id rather be single than compromise on those things though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Anyone with any type of addiction or a liar. Although the two go hand in hand quite often."
Speaking as one who had a addiction...how would you say the outcome of lying or not...once the addiction has gone?
Just a little curious |
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By *yldstyle OP Woman
over a year ago
A world of my own |
"So I think the real question the op wanted to ask/is being dodged is, would you consider someone who's currently on fab as "relationship material"?"
Nope that wasn't what I was asking. However for some it would put them off |
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"Anyone with any type of addiction or a liar. Although the two go hand in hand quite often.
Speaking as one who had a addiction...how would you say the outcome of lying or not...once the addiction has gone?
Just a little curious "
Sorry I don't understand what you're asking me . Can you clarify a little? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Anyone with any type of addiction or a liar. Although the two go hand in hand quite often.
Speaking as one who had a addiction...how would you say the outcome of lying or not...once the addiction has gone?
Just a little curious
Sorry I don't understand what you're asking me . Can you clarify a little?"
Ah I misread your qoute...I read it as anyone with addiction is a liar...doh need to go to specsavers |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Had a few dates last year with a very attractive lady . She was funny , sexy and pretty cool but it soon became apparent that she really disliked dogs which was a dealbreaker.
She knew I had one from the off too . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Someone with no drive or ambition, someone with no job or still lives with their parents.
Someone rude, someone who lacks sympathy or empathy, someone who doesn't listen or change, someone who isn't kind and funny, someone boring and someone who's not willing to try new things and take risks.
Someone vanilla in the bedroom, someone with a low or no sex drive, close minded folk or bigoted c**ts.
Someone passive or completely sub.
I don't ask for much
~Mia |
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"Anyone with any type of addiction or a liar. Although the two go hand in hand quite often.
Speaking as one who had a addiction...how would you say the outcome of lying or not...once the addiction has gone?
Just a little curious
Sorry I don't understand what you're asking me . Can you clarify a little?
Ah I misread your qoute...I read it as anyone with addiction is a liar...doh need to go to specsavers "
. My experience of being in a relationship with an addict and having an alcoholic in the family is that they lie to conceal their addiction. I wouldn't go so far as to presume that all addicts do that though. However lying destroys trust and I wouldn't take that risk.
I think a nice pair of frames with a small diamante at each corner would suit you very well |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Anyone with any type of addiction or a liar. Although the two go hand in hand quite often.
Speaking as one who had a addiction...how would you say the outcome of lying or not...once the addiction has gone?
Just a little curious
Sorry I don't understand what you're asking me . Can you clarify a little?
Ah I misread your qoute...I read it as anyone with addiction is a liar...doh need to go to specsavers
. My experience of being in a relationship with an addict and having an alcoholic in the family is that they lie to conceal their addiction. I wouldn't go so far as to presume that all addicts do that though. However lying destroys trust and I wouldn't take that risk.
I think a nice pair of frames with a small diamante at each corner would suit you very well "
How did you know I wore glasses?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Someone who doesn't know how to dream be creative laugh at the world break the rules and who is too afraid to take a chance, not just sexually, and see where it leads...
Maybe I'm overly optimistic but we only get one shot at life...sorry Buddists and we only regret those things we never dared to try.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Someone who doesn't listen. I can be quite a deep thinker at times and i need to be able to express that and while I dont expect them to fully understand me Id really like them to at least accept what Im saying about how I feel."
All you women have something to say, a man must learn to listen. Flight or die in that sense. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Men who like to live it large and party like it's 1997.
I prefer more sedate men (not boring, just more quiet) these days.
I've dated a lad. I've dated a fella whose travelled and had wanderlust. I just want someone steady. Reliable. Filthy in bed but a gent out of bed.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I think the real question the op wanted to ask/is being dodged is, would you consider someone who's currently on fab as "relationship material"?"
Bingo.
And no, many men dont. It is what it is. I have told quite a few vanilla friends about this site and they were...surprisingly disgusted. The issue is plenty of women want traditional men despite leading non traditional lives (and yes, you have the exact same double standard vise versa) but it still seems as if it hurts u more being a woman. |
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"Anyone with any type of addiction or a liar. Although the two go hand in hand quite often.
Speaking as one who had a addiction...how would you say the outcome of lying or not...once the addiction has gone?
Just a little curious
Sorry I don't understand what you're asking me . Can you clarify a little?
Ah I misread your qoute...I read it as anyone with addiction is a liar...doh need to go to specsavers
. My experience of being in a relationship with an addict and having an alcoholic in the family is that they lie to conceal their addiction. I wouldn't go so far as to presume that all addicts do that though. However lying destroys trust and I wouldn't take that risk.
I think a nice pair of frames with a small diamante at each corner would suit you very well
How did you know I wore glasses? "
I am the all seeing eye...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Anyone with any type of addiction or a liar. Although the two go hand in hand quite often.
Speaking as one who had a addiction...how would you say the outcome of lying or not...once the addiction has gone?
Just a little curious
Sorry I don't understand what you're asking me . Can you clarify a little?
Ah I misread your qoute...I read it as anyone with addiction is a liar...doh need to go to specsavers
. My experience of being in a relationship with an addict and having an alcoholic in the family is that they lie to conceal their addiction. I wouldn't go so far as to presume that all addicts do that though. However lying destroys trust and I wouldn't take that risk.
I think a nice pair of frames with a small diamante at each corner would suit you very well
How did you know I wore glasses?
I am the all seeing eye... "
Eye eye I'll have to keep an eye on you |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
cheater
low or average intelligence
dominant
conformist
non-supportive
flakey
doesn't give me enough attention or makes me feel unimportant
expects me to clean up after them
bad taste in music
enjoys too much TV
rages
talks shit
low sex drive
their exes are 'crazy'
secretive or closed
impatient
hypocrites
and i shall remain single forever probably. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"cheater
low or average intelligence
dominant
conformist
non-supportive
flakey
doesn't give me enough attention or makes me feel unimportant
expects me to clean up after them
bad taste in music
enjoys too much TV
rages
talks shit
low sex drive
their exes are 'crazy'
secretive or closed
impatient
hypocrites
and i shall remain single forever probably. "
What she said |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"cheater
low or average intelligence
dominant
conformist
non-supportive
flakey
doesn't give me enough attention or makes me feel unimportant
expects me to clean up after them
bad taste in music
enjoys too much TV
rages
talks shit
low sex drive
their exes are 'crazy'
secretive or closed
impatient
hypocrites
and i shall remain single forever probably. "
.havent you described several of your ex's as crazy in the past? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Small children from previous relationships.
Crazy ex baby mumma.
Unkind, uncompassionate and unfunny ( is unfunny a word? )
A liar, cheater or someone that put me down.
Low sex drive.
Too vanilla and conventional.....
I think I'll stop there
No wonder I'm single - I have more to add but cant be arsed |
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This is going to sound really soppy and idealistic... but someone who doesn't want to have adventures (small ones. I am not climbing Everest) or work together to build a shared future is not for me.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Someone who doesn't want to make any effort . My ex would constantly complain how he hated his job etc yet never did anything about it even when I found job vacancies for him |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
"cheater
low or average intelligence
dominant
conformist
non-supportive
flakey
doesn't give me enough attention or makes me feel unimportant
expects me to clean up after them
bad taste in music
enjoys too much TV
rages
talks shit
low sex drive
*all* their exes are 'crazy'
secretive or closed
impatient
hypocrites
and i shall remain single forever probably.
.havent you described several of your ex's as crazy in the past?"
yes, one was a sociopath and the other not sure what he was but he's a dick and definitely not right in the head. my first covert sociopath maybe.
ok i will allow one crazy ex but if they fuck up again and it wasn't a covert crazy ex then i am saying no to dating them coz i am crazy and need keeping in check.
amended my list also. |
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Too serious
Lack of play fighting
Selfish
Rude to people like waitresses etc.
Bad taste in music and forcing me to listen to it
Tunnel visioned
Not wanting a 3some with another lady. I need to quench that side of me sometimes. |
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"cheater
low or average intelligence
dominant
conformist
non-supportive
flakey
doesn't give me enough attention or makes me feel unimportant
expects me to clean up after them
bad taste in music
enjoys too much TV
rages
talks shit
low sex drive
their exes are 'crazy'
secretive or closed
impatient
hypocrites
and i shall remain single forever probably. "
Oh you had one of these too. Delightful ain't they. 
I'm never going down the manipulation, degrading, making you feel like you're lower than amphibian shit road again. I know the signs now, I have little flags in my head. I'm not gonna be a punching bag for anyone ever again, physically or emotionally. |
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What stops me now is if I think they are good. I now know without dawt my judgment sucks so if I think it might work I know it definitely won't. However I've not put this logic to the test the other way round not quite sure why |
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"I once dated a woman who was like a female version of me. We just ended up clashing and couldn't even remain friends so I wouldn't date someone so alike me again. Is that strange? "
My partner is the opposite of me in many ways but we have the same moral and social conscience I guess. And yes he does know I am on here! I don't think I could live with someone like me either. I guess we all need someone who compensates for our weaknesses and yet also gains from our strengths. |
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"What stops me now is if I think they are good. I now know without dawt my judgment sucks so if I think it might work I know it definitely won't. However I've not put this logic to the test the other way round not quite sure why "
That's erm.... different!
You think I'm lovely and funny and actually a sweetheart don't ya? Your judgement is perfect |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"cheater
low or average intelligence
dominant
conformist
non-supportive
flakey
doesn't give me enough attention or makes me feel unimportant
expects me to clean up after them
bad taste in music
enjoys too much TV
rages
talks shit
low sex drive
*all* their exes are 'crazy'
secretive or closed
impatient
hypocrites
and i shall remain single forever probably.
.havent you described several of your ex's as crazy in the past?
yes, one was a sociopath and the other not sure what he was but he's a dick and definitely not right in the head. my first covert sociopath maybe.
ok i will allow one crazy ex but if they fuck up again and it wasn't a covert crazy ex then i am saying no to dating them coz i am crazy and need keeping in check.
amended my list also. "
I fail on just one of your turn offs since your amendment, I'm feeling quite good about myself now |
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"What stops me now is if I think they are good. I now know without dawt my judgment sucks so if I think it might work I know it definitely won't. However I've not put this logic to the test the other way round not quite sure why
That's erm.... different!
You think I'm lovely and funny and actually a sweetheart don't ya? Your judgement is perfect "
Yes but you do know all men tell lies don't ya |
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"What stops me now is if I think they are good. I now know without dawt my judgment sucks so if I think it might work I know it definitely won't. However I've not put this logic to the test the other way round not quite sure why
That's erm.... different!
You think I'm lovely and funny and actually a sweetheart don't ya? Your judgement is perfect
Yes but you do know all men tell lies don't ya "
I can sniff em. I'm like a bloodhound when it comes to bullshit
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I wouldn't have a relationship with anyone on this site. "
I think I would have a better chance of finding someone who would love and understand me on here than anywhere else |
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"What stops me now is if I think they are good. I now know without dawt my judgment sucks so if I think it might work I know it definitely won't. However I've not put this logic to the test the other way round not quite sure why
That's erm.... different!
You think I'm lovely and funny and actually a sweetheart don't ya? Your judgement is perfect
Yes but you do know all men tell lies don't ya
I can sniff em. I'm like a bloodhound when it comes to bullshit
"
And tell me how did you like my aftershave |
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"I wouldn't have a relationship with anyone on this site.
I think I would have a better chance of finding someone who would love and understand me on here than anywhere else"
Think I agree with this but not happened in 4 years so it's looking dodgie to be fair |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I once dated a woman who was like a female version of me. We just ended up clashing and couldn't even remain friends so I wouldn't date someone so alike me again. Is that strange?
My partner is the opposite of me in many ways but we have the same moral and social conscience I guess. And yes he does know I am on here! I don't think I could live with someone like me either. I guess we all need someone who compensates for our weaknesses and yet also gains from our strengths. "
Very well put. Can never really compromise with someone when they think the same way. |
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"What stops me now is if I think they are good. I now know without dawt my judgment sucks so if I think it might work I know it definitely won't. However I've not put this logic to the test the other way round not quite sure why
That's erm.... different!
You think I'm lovely and funny and actually a sweetheart don't ya? Your judgement is perfect
Yes but you do know all men tell lies don't ya
I can sniff em. I'm like a bloodhound when it comes to bullshit
And tell me how did you like my aftershave "
All I could smell was eau de shite 
I jest my dear. You were too high up for me to do the sniff test. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I would have a relationship with someone on this site... be a bit hypocritical if not wouldn't it.
'What's good for the goose'and all that."
Why would it be hypocritical? |
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"If someone had different values to me. Someone arrogant. If someone wasn't funny. Someone who didn't have a good moral compass and someone disrespectful. There's more I could add. Perhaps that's why I'm single. Id rather be single than compromise on those things though "
Would agree with this too.... |
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"What stops me now is if I think they are good. I now know without dawt my judgment sucks so if I think it might work I know it definitely won't. However I've not put this logic to the test the other way round not quite sure why
That's erm.... different!
You think I'm lovely and funny and actually a sweetheart don't ya? Your judgement is perfect
Yes but you do know all men tell lies don't ya
I can sniff em. I'm like a bloodhound when it comes to bullshit
And tell me how did you like my aftershave
All I could smell was eau de shite
I jest my dear. You were too high up for me to do the sniff test."
I'll remember to pick you up next time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I wouldn't have a relationship with anyone on this site.
I think I would have a better chance of finding someone who would love and understand me on here than anywhere else
I second this for me."
Thirded |
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"What stops me now is if I think they are good. I now know without dawt my judgment sucks so if I think it might work I know it definitely won't. However I've not put this logic to the test the other way round not quite sure why
That's erm.... different!
You think I'm lovely and funny and actually a sweetheart don't ya? Your judgement is perfect
Yes but you do know all men tell lies don't ya
I can sniff em. I'm like a bloodhound when it comes to bullshit
And tell me how did you like my aftershave
All I could smell was eau de shite
I jest my dear. You were too high up for me to do the sniff test.
I'll remember to pick you up next time "
Just don't pull your back trying. It's a long way up! |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
"cheater
low or average intelligence
dominant
conformist
non-supportive
flakey
doesn't give me enough attention or makes me feel unimportant
expects me to clean up after them
bad taste in music
enjoys too much TV
rages
talks shit
low sex drive
*all* their exes are 'crazy'
secretive or closed
impatient
hypocrites
and i shall remain single forever probably.
.havent you described several of your ex's as crazy in the past?
yes, one was a sociopath and the other not sure what he was but he's a dick and definitely not right in the head. my first covert sociopath maybe.
ok i will allow one crazy ex but if they fuck up again and it wasn't a covert crazy ex then i am saying no to dating them coz i am crazy and need keeping in check.
amended my list also.
I fail on just one of your turn offs since your amendment, I'm feeling quite good about myself now "
i know i'm too fussy but laid back hasn't work for me. plus i think those are good things to be fussy about.
hopefully everyone passes that list really. |
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"What stops me now is if I think they are good. I now know without dawt my judgment sucks so if I think it might work I know it definitely won't. However I've not put this logic to the test the other way round not quite sure why
That's erm.... different!
You think I'm lovely and funny and actually a sweetheart don't ya? Your judgement is perfect
Yes but you do know all men tell lies don't ya
I can sniff em. I'm like a bloodhound when it comes to bullshit
And tell me how did you like my aftershave
All I could smell was eau de shite
I jest my dear. You were too high up for me to do the sniff test.
I'll remember to pick you up next time
Just don't pull your back trying. It's a long way up!"
Think I'd be more worried about breaking you but I'm brave so I'll give it a try |
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Of course someone on Fab can be relationship material. If you are actually a swinger, surely you'd want to date another swinger?
In my case, I've never been in a relationship with anyone who was monogamous and if I have a "type" it is certainly naughty, promiscuous and honest about it. |
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someone that have been with too many men, obnoxious, too self-conscious, slob, bad habits, and not taking care of their health.
What’s more important is what are you bring to the relationship all well and nice to say I want and I don’t..good looks don’t cut it except in special cases. Are you interesting to care for, compliments each other doesn’t have to be verbally more receptive.
Like attracts like - not opposite |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Of course someone on Fab can be relationship material. If you are actually a swinger, surely you'd want to date another swinger?
In my case, I've never been in a relationship with anyone who was monogamous and if I have a "type" it is certainly naughty, promiscuous and honest about it. "
I wouldn't date a swinger. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"cheater
low or average intelligence
dominant
conformist
non-supportive
flakey
doesn't give me enough attention or makes me feel unimportant
expects me to clean up after them
bad taste in music
enjoys too much TV
rages
talks shit
low sex drive
*all* their exes are 'crazy'
secretive or closed
impatient
hypocrites
and i shall remain single forever probably.
.havent you described several of your ex's as crazy in the past?
yes, one was a sociopath and the other not sure what he was but he's a dick and definitely not right in the head. my first covert sociopath maybe.
ok i will allow one crazy ex but if they fuck up again and it wasn't a covert crazy ex then i am saying no to dating them coz i am crazy and need keeping in check.
amended my list also. "
surely this makes you a hypocrite then lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Of course someone on Fab can be relationship material. If you are actually a swinger, surely you'd want to date another swinger?
In my case, I've never been in a relationship with anyone who was monogamous and if I have a "type" it is certainly naughty, promiscuous and honest about it. "
some people want to enjoy this life style while thier young and obligation free.
I wouldn't want to raise kids in an open relationship.
others can and do succeed but I know i wouldn't handle it.
So for me a romantic partner woupd be monogamous but that raises issues with my closest friends also have been/being FWB at somepoint even if they wouldn't be then.
it would be hard to find a partner who could cope with that level of trust requirement in a brand new relationship |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
"cheater
low or average intelligence
dominant
conformist
non-supportive
flakey
doesn't give me enough attention or makes me feel unimportant
expects me to clean up after them
bad taste in music
enjoys too much TV
rages
talks shit
low sex drive
*all* their exes are 'crazy'
secretive or closed
impatient
hypocrites
and i shall remain single forever probably.
.havent you described several of your ex's as crazy in the past?
yes, one was a sociopath and the other not sure what he was but he's a dick and definitely not right in the head. my first covert sociopath maybe.
ok i will allow one crazy ex but if they fuck up again and it wasn't a covert crazy ex then i am saying no to dating them coz i am crazy and need keeping in check.
amended my list also.
surely this makes you a hypocrite then lol"
no, i'm giving them the same chances i had. one overt and one covert abusive relationship.
tbh after being in an abusive relationship, where the abuse was overt and not hidden, and knowing what i was like then i should automatically rule out those people. but people can learn from their mistakes.
covert ones i can be more lenient about because you often don't know what's happening. |
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I've dated several flakey women and find them very interesting.
For me personally I cannot imagine being on a swingers site and not open to dating swingers. But I have no shred of monogamy in me and expect nothing different from partners. |
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"Following on from the dating bbw thread.
I know "relationship material" is a very dated and shallow turn of phrase. However we all have our own individual wants and needs. A virtual tick list of what you need or want. (Even if we think we dont)
So my question is what would stop you seeing someone as "relationship material"
No judging or bashing peoples views please!
"
TBH I'd say I'm not 'relationship material ' - not in the real world anyway!
I don't want monogamy or 24/7 - but I want someone 'significant '!
Pretty much everyone I've met wants either more or less than I want!
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