FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Roll eye status updates.
Roll eye status updates.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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You've all seen them. You've all done it. The status updates that do the rounds. Rather than roll eyes. Invent a witty retort like we do.
Hmmmm! (Just finished off the multipack of Doritos)
Hmmm Hmmm! (Was that not a song by the crash test dummies)
No pic no reply! (You go first?)
Read the profile! (I have but by sentence two I got bored, but hey you've got nice tits so I will over look that)
READ THE PROFILE!! (I have but got half way down the Do's and Dont's I got bored. Still got great tits though!)
I'm back! (Had you gone?)
Anyone miss me? (Had you gone? You've only been offline two days)
Well that was different! (So is playing canasta with an elephant but if you don't explain I can't tell the difference.
I shall let you lot continue. Have fun.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When females post that's it's time of the month and looking for a female for the hubby.
( really do we need to know and can't he go without for a few days ) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The - that was great, until next time....
You might have just eaten the best takeaway on a Friday like you do every week?
Or did you get shagged off someone off Fab? Amazing.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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On a guy's profile : wow! What a great evening! You know who you are! (No they don't, you've just made that up haven't you?)
Looking for a woman to satisfy my hubby while I'm at work! (Hubby wrote this - and he'll delete it before Mrs leaves work or if Mrs even exists)
From females : site supporter pass runs out in a week, don't know whether to renew (someone pay for me...) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's fab.... it's up to each person to put what they want on their profile or status...
If you don't like what you read...
It's simples...just move on
or did I just fall I to the Thursday rant thread? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's fab.... it's up to each person to put what they want on their profile or status...
If you don't like what you read...
It's simples...just move on
or did I just fall I to the Thursday rant thread?"
I think it's just a light-hearted thread fella. You may be overthinking it!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You've all seen them. You've all done it. The status updates that do the rounds. Rather than roll eyes. Invent a witty retort like we do.
Hmmmm! (Just finished off the multipack of Doritos)
Hmmm Hmmm! (Was that not a song by the crash test dummies)
No pic no reply! (You go first?)
Read the profile! (I have but by sentence two I got bored, but hey you've got nice tits so I will over look that)
READ THE PROFILE!! (I have but got half way down the Do's and Dont's I got bored. Still got great tits though!)
I'm back! (Had you gone?)
Anyone miss me? (Had you gone? You've only been offline two days)
Well that was different! (So is playing canasta with an elephant but if you don't explain I can't tell the difference.
I shall let you lot continue. Have fun. "
So you didn't read my profile then - hurrumph and stampy feet |
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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago
Hillside desolate |
"You know who you are (yes i fucking do but if you don't actually name me in your status i'm ignoring your messages from now on)."
Or you know who you are - yes a person you invented so we all think you're getting some |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
"You've all seen them. You've all done it. The status updates that do the rounds. Rather than roll eyes. Invent a witty retort like we do.
Hmmmm! (Just finished off the multipack of Doritos)
Hmmm Hmmm! (Was that not a song by the crash test dummies)
No pic no reply! (You go first?)
Read the profile! (I have but by sentence two I got bored, but hey you've got nice tits so I will over look that)
READ THE PROFILE!! (I have but got half way down the Do's and Dont's I got bored. Still got great tits though!)
I'm back! (Had you gone?)
Anyone miss me? (Had you gone? You've only been offline two days)
Well that was different! (So is playing canasta with an elephant but if you don't explain I can't tell the difference.
I shall let you lot continue. Have fun.
So you didn't read my profile then - hurrumph and stampy feet "
Read what is this mystical thing....I just look at pics as they tell a thousand words  |
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Anyone genuine here that actually meets? (yes, lots, but seemingly not with *you*!)
In my hotel and horny, who wants to fuck? (for god's sake, at least put a meet up)
This place is crap (feeling sorry for myself - hoping my status will prompt a pity fuck (unlikely)) |
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"It's fab.... it's up to each person to put what they want on their profile or status...
If you don't like what you read...
It's simples...just move on
or did I just fall I to the Thursday rant thread?"
Just as simple to ignore this read. Nobody says 'simples'. |
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There is a couple profile in my area that is all 420 this... 420 that.
"Any one drop off some 420. Cash or my tits...your choice."
"Anyone fancy a Meet. Bring 420"
Their last 7 statuses have been variations of this.
We know it's cannabis!!!!
You are not using some Top secret code. You know it is against site rules otherwise there is no need for the code.
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"1at that say 'Unless it a Tom Hardy/Will Smith lookalike I'm not interested' really! Haha as if there are Tom Hardy lookalikes on every corner  "
Unfortunately this is true - I've never seen one on any corner ... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's fab.... it's up to each person to put what they want on their profile or status...
If you don't like what you read...
It's simples...just move on
or did I just fall I to the Thursday rant thread?
Just as simple to ignore this read. Nobody says 'simples'."
And yet you didn't |
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"On a guy's profile : wow! What a great evening! You know who you are! (No they don't, you've just made that up haven't you?)
Looking for a woman to satisfy my hubby while I'm at work! (Hubby wrote this - and he'll delete it before Mrs leaves work or if Mrs even exists)
From females : site supporter pass runs out in a week, don't know whether to renew (someone pay for me...)"
Mrs here and i am looking for a playmate for hubby as im off to america for three months. And i was willing to speak in person but im guessing my hubbys only good enough for me as only one woman wants him lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's fab.... it's up to each person to put what they want on their profile or status...
If you don't like what you read...
It's simples...just move on
or did I just fall I to the Thursday rant thread?
Just as simple to ignore this read. Nobody says 'simples'."
Our learned friended is either on rant Thursday, has put up some genius status updates or woe betide he is whiteknighting thus creating his own status update in this thread.
Anyway back to game.
What to do today? Hmmmm! (Eat another pack of multipack Doritos) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When females post that's it's time of the month and looking for a female for the hubby.
( really do we need to know and can't he go without for a few days ) "
I doubt it's the female posting |
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1 on my Local Updates this morning made me laugh...
"Going for a wee. Back in 3"
(I'm going to be charitable and assume he was poking fun at other facebook-type updates lol)
Another one read "Free house for an hour this morning if any lady wants to come fuck me and go". I dunno how I resisted rushing straight over...   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"1 on my Local Updates this morning made me laugh...
"Going for a wee. Back in 3"
(I'm going to be charitable and assume he was poking fun at other facebook-type updates lol)
Another one read "Free house for an hour this morning if any lady wants to come fuck me and go". I dunno how I resisted rushing straight over... "
Ha.must start looking at my local updates |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"1at that say 'Unless it a Tom Hardy/Will Smith lookalike I'm not interested' really! Haha as if there are Tom Hardy lookalikes on every corner
Unfortunately this is true - I've never seen one on any corner ..."
Haha thank you, was starting to think maybe there is 5 in every city except Essex haha |
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I said this a few years ago.
I'd remove the 'status' option as it inflates egos and way more often than not they are completely pointless.
People get ignored on Facebook so they say it here instead and due to certain features not being on here but on facey they have no idea how uninterested we are about it.
eg. Hungover or even daily diary often beginning with the word 'right'. 'Right best go and .....'
Yes I am fun at party's. I put the 'fun' into funeral. Thankfully we have a block button and I use it mostly for status ' s.
You've been to the gym or for a run. Well done, have some cake.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I said this a few years ago.
I'd remove the 'status' option as it inflates egos and way more often than not they are completely pointless.
People get ignored on Facebook so they say it here instead and due to certain features not being on here but on facey they have no idea how uninterested we are about it.
eg. Hungover or even daily diary often beginning with the word 'right'. 'Right best go and .....'
Yes I am fun at party's. I put the 'fun' into funeral. Thankfully we have a block button and I use it mostly for status ' s.
You've been to the gym or for a run. Well done, have some cake.
"
I think they're great, they often speak volumes about a person. |
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"I said this a few years ago.
I'd remove the 'status' option as it inflates egos and way more often than not they are completely pointless.
People get ignored on Facebook so they say it here instead and due to certain features not being on here but on facey they have no idea how uninterested we are about it.
eg. Hungover or even daily diary often beginning with the word 'right'. 'Right best go and .....'
Yes I am fun at party's. I put the 'fun' into funeral. Thankfully we have a block button and I use it mostly for status ' s.
You've been to the gym or for a run. Well done, have some cake.
I think they're great, they often speak volumes about a person."
I'm the complete opposite of that as it's only the Internet and you can who you like to some extent |
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
My status updates make me laugh, cringe or just
'Do lady's read messages or just delete' We do but delete lots, shame yours was one of them!!!
'Thursday fuck' Don't worry it's Friday tomorrow.
'Stopped on the 4th layby on the A43' And? No, I don't want to meet you in your lorry
'I love girls who play on their period' Really? Your wife doesn't mind a scene resembling the Chainsaw Massacre then?
'On holiday, will answer messages when I get back' I'm on my honeymoon but she's too vanilla for me, call you soon (true story!) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When people put words from a song up "
Je ne regrette rien!
But seriously, I think you'd enjoy this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yhPzx2KLoUg
Had me in tears. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Mines full of " can anyone drop bud/ off" manchester has some classy birds. Not sure why anyone would need to go on a site to ask that, manchester is rife with it. |
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Really need a hug / Feeling devastated / Great, that's all I need and similar such attention seeking statuses - Faceache is *that* way if you're hoping for lots of 'Awww, whassup hun' type responses |
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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago
Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro |
"Anyone genuine here that actually meets? (yes, lots, but seemingly not with *you*!)
In my hotel and horny, who wants to fuck? (for god's sake, at least put a meet up)
This place is crap (feeling sorry for myself - hoping my status will prompt a pity fuck (unlikely))"
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The worst for me is 'I hate having no money' or 'who wants to spoil me?' (Basically who wants to pay me for sex)
Makes me cringe "
Don't forget the ones that use the status box as a gumtree ad to get the desperate blokes to run here there and bleedin' everywhere hoping to get some lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The worst for me is 'I hate having no money' or 'who wants to spoil me?' (Basically who wants to pay me for sex)
Makes me cringe "
Haha! Must make a note. For me 'spoil me' means a good back stroke and a cup of tea in bed. Could have gone horribly wrong.. |
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""Going to xyz club on XXXXX day - come say hi if you see me"
...because of course I'm going to recognise you from your cock/boob pic "
And the daily countdown reminders you get. Same with holidays.
I can't myself and always send a message asking of they are going there, only you haven't mentioned it much |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
This twist on the 'truck' meet just appeared on my timeline:
"Free about 12.15 once i find a place to park if you wanna meet in my truck?"
So now we've got to wait to find out the mystery location (which could be miles away) too...and as of right now have 6 minutes to get there!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My feed is full of guys whining that 'this site is sh*t', 'no one meets', 'all talk on here' etc etc.
On closer inspection, none of them have a profile, nevermind photos.
What goes through these people's heads at all? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"'Feeling horny'. Congratulations. As are most of us otherwise we wouldn't be on the site...most feel horny and still they don't meet lol  "
Disagree completely. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"'Feeling horny'. Congratulations. As are most of us otherwise we wouldn't be on the site...most feel horny and still they don't meet lol
Disagree completely."
The obligatory roll eye answer to your statement.
"What's up hun?" 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"'Feeling horny'. Congratulations. As are most of us otherwise we wouldn't be on the site...most feel horny and still they don't meet lol
Disagree completely.
The obligatory roll eye answer to your statement.
"What's up hun?"
"
Nothing wrong with me, I'm having fun! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The worst for me is 'I hate having no money' or 'who wants to spoil me?' (Basically who wants to pay me for sex)
Makes me cringe "
HIT the nail on the head myself think they shld be banned, you right its literally saying 'spoil me with gifts for sex' |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When people put words from a song up
Guilty 
Same here, what's wrong with putting up song lyrics?  "
Totally guilty of song lyrics and film quotes when the mood takes me. Heh ho. Tomorrow is another day. |
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"When people put words from a song up
Guilty
Same here, what's wrong with putting up song lyrics?
Totally guilty of song lyrics and film quotes when the mood takes me. Heh ho. Tomorrow is another day. "
I'm sure there's many men that overlook any status failings for you my lady
Talk about scorching hot ! Wowzer haha
. . Some people can get away with anything due to being very alluring. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's fab.... it's up to each person to put what they want on their profile or status...
If you don't like what you read...
It's simples...just move on
or did I just fall I to the Thursday rant thread?"
Bravo. Well said.
Oh dear read mine you will all love pulling mine to pieces. Do I care. Nah |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People who name and shame....despicable behavior that..."
Stealth barebacking they deserve to be name and shamed. Anyone who does something which is unforgiveable should be named and shamed |
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"People who name and shame....despicable behavior that...
Stealth barebacking they deserve to be name and shamed. Anyone who does something which is unforgiveable should be named and shamed "
Does this not constitute the 'R' word we're not allowed to say, as it is done without consent?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People who name and shame....despicable behavior that...
Stealth barebacking they deserve to be name and shamed. Anyone who does something which is unforgiveable should be named and shamed
Does this not constitute the 'R' word we're not allowed to say, as it is done without consent? "
In my eyes yes it does and I'd dearly love to name and shame that person thst did it to me so he never does it again. Thankfully all is good. |
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