FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Not looking for single guys
Not looking for single guys
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Can all men on here just understand what that means, it means that the profile owner has their filters on so nobody can message them.
It doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking for single guys, it just means they do their own searching and messaging.
Spread it amongst your homies.
It might actually mean they aren't looking for anyone but I'd say in 90% of cases it's just that the person doesn't want unsolicited mail. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can all men on here just understand what that means, it means that the profile owner has their filters on so nobody can message them.
It doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking for single guys, it just means they do their own searching and messaging.
Spread it amongst your homies.
It might actually mean they aren't looking for anyone but I'd say in 90% of cases it's just that the person doesn't want unsolicited mail. "
But if you have filters on, what does it matter. They can't contact you anyway. Can they? we already get the message.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can all men on here just understand what that means, it means that the profile owner has their filters on so nobody can message them.
It doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking for single guys, it just means they do their own searching and messaging.
Spread it amongst your homies.
It might actually mean they aren't looking for anyone but I'd say in 90% of cases it's just that the person doesn't want unsolicited mail.
But if you have filters on, what does it matter. They can't contact you anyway. Can they? we already get the message. "
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Bit misleading then really ain't it? Lol.i mean if ur filters are set so u don't receive messages from single men anyway why say something that isn't strictly true?(if I see it on a profile I don't message btw) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can all men on here just understand what that means, it means that the profile owner has their filters on so nobody can message them.
It doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking for single guys, it just means they do their own searching and messaging.
Spread it amongst your homies.
It might actually mean they aren't looking for anyone but I'd say in 90% of cases it's just that the person doesn't want unsolicited mail. "
But but but your profile says looking for single men......s'no fair  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Bit misleading then really ain't it? Lol.i mean if ur filters are set so u don't receive messages from single men anyway why say something that isn't strictly true?(if I see it on a profile I don't message btw)"
It's not the profile owner saying it, the site automatically puts "not looking for single men" if you block single males, doesn't do it for couples or women or tv's. Only does it for men which is stupid and something the site should remove. It should just say "not accepting inbound mail"
Leads to confusion then when women say on the forums that they want single men.
Like I am looking for single guys yet my profile says I'm not. I didn't write it or select the option to say not looking, I simply set all my filters. |
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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago
Best Greggs in Cheshire East |
"Bit misleading then really ain't it? Lol.i mean if ur filters are set so u don't receive messages from single men anyway why say something that isn't strictly true?(if I see it on a profile I don't message btw)
It's not the profile owner saying it, the site automatically puts "not looking for single men" if you block single males, doesn't do it for couples or women or tv's. Only does it for men which is stupid and something the site should remove. It should just say "not accepting inbound mail"
Leads to confusion then when women say on the forums that they want single men.
Like I am looking for single guys yet my profile says I'm not. I didn't write it or select the option to say not looking, I simply set all my filters. "
It says it on mine. I didnt put it there. It is true mind haha |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I've just put all my filters on as an experiment.  I only usually chat to friends and I mostly mass delete approx 80 messages a day.
PTU xxx"
How come your profile says not looking for all the options when mine only shows the single guys thing!?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Bit misleading then really ain't it? Lol.i mean if ur filters are set so u don't receive messages from single men anyway why say something that isn't strictly true?(if I see it on a profile I don't message btw)"
It's what is stated on the profile when you put your filters on. You don't need to write it in the bit bellow.
I have my filters on most of the time as I get really overwhelmed by the messages.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It is confusing a lot of men. I think the site should stop adding that to a profile when you block them. It doesn't necessarily mean you aren't looking for them. It doesn't add not looking for couples or women, so why men? |
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"Can all men on here just understand what that means, it means that the profile owner has their filters on so nobody can message them.
It doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking for single guys, it just means they do their own searching and messaging.
Spread it amongst your homies.
It might actually mean they aren't looking for anyone but I'd say in 90% of cases it's just that the person doesn't want unsolicited mail.
But if you have filters on, what does it matter. They can't contact you anyway. Can they? we already get the message. "
You would be surprised at just how many don't get the message, however way you word it. |
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"Can all men on here just understand what that means, it means that the profile owner has their filters on so nobody can message them.
It doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking for single guys, it just means they do their own searching and messaging.
Spread it amongst your homies.
It might actually mean they aren't looking for anyone but I'd say in 90% of cases it's just that the person doesn't want unsolicited mail. "
I do believe that anybody can put any filter they want without question, after all on this site there should be something for everybody everyone has their reasons for being here. Their wants, needs and desires can probably be fulfilled and chances are there is somebody to help them with all of those needs and desires. Although it would be nice to be able to send a wink perhaps to some. people might choose to ignore it anyway, however if u see a picture or something or a profile that you appreciate it would be nice to be able to show that appreciation and the receiver could choose whether or not to acknowledge x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Although it would be nice to be able to send a wink perhaps to some. people might choose to ignore it anyway, however if u see a picture or something or a profile that you appreciate it would be nice to be able to show that appreciation and the receiver could choose whether or not to acknowledge x "
Yes exactly this! I would like to see what guys have looked at me also. Going through all the potential profiles is like searching for a needle in a haystack. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Bit misleading then really ain't it? Lol.i mean if ur filters are set so u don't receive messages from single men anyway why say something that isn't strictly true?(if I see it on a profile I don't message btw)
It's not the profile owner saying it, the site automatically puts "not looking for single men" if you block single males, doesn't do it for couples or women or tv's. Only does it for men which is stupid and something the site should remove. It should just say "not accepting inbound mail"
Leads to confusion then when women say on the forums that they want single men.
Like I am looking for single guys yet my profile says I'm not. I didn't write it or select the option to say not looking, I simply set all my filters. "
It's there because it wasn't thought through thoroughly by those who implemented it.... If it was there for everyone then there would be very little traffic of communication on fab as most would have the filter in place for others too...and even if you wanted to do your own searching you couldn't because other groups would be doing likewise.
Secondly it also has the added frustration when the said lady goes to message and can't because she's blocked due to having .not looking for single men. I do take it as not interested and so tend to block said profiles so they don't waste my time when I'm searching. Catch 22 situation I guess but there are plenty who don't put that up. As a guy I tend to prefer making the first contact for various reasons and often have suspicions when I'm contacted first. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Didn't think I could be blocked by potential meets because of what's stated on the profile.
I also don't like the fact that cos I have single men blocked they don't show on my 'who's looked at me page'
I'd like to see what men have looked at me. The only thing I can check is who has fabbed my pictures. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I use it when i'm just not in the mood to chat or deal with loads of mail, so unless it's someone i have already spoken to or someone from my friend's list, then they can't message.
I think we all use it with different intentions. A few more options would be good.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Didn't think I could be blocked by potential meets because of what's stated on the profile.
I also don't like the fact that cos I have single men blocked they don't show on my 'who's looked at me page'
I'd like to see what men have looked at me. The only thing I can check is who has fabbed my pictures. "
This has been raised a few times on the forums over the past couple of years and is frustrating for both parties. For many it says what it says on the tin..."not interested" so why would anyone try especially as there is so much criticism of unsolicited mail from single guys.
There needs to be a better and different system put in place. Maybe a pre message stage to show someone is interested.... say just a wink first a response from receiver then the gut can message...at least it gives them the option of showing interest and ability to initiate..... maybe subs don't mind but as a natural Alpha male I do like to take the lead. |
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" Although it would be nice to be able to send a wink perhaps to some. people might choose to ignore it anyway, however if u see a picture or something or a profile that you appreciate it would be nice to be able to show that appreciation and the receiver could choose whether or not to acknowledge x
Yes exactly this! I would like to see what guys have looked at me also. Going through all the potential profiles is like searching for a needle in a haystack. "
Lol I'm blocked from messaging u x have a lovely day x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Being able to send a wink regardless if filters should be an option like not receiving messages from non members etc.
Same as you should be able to choose who you see on the who's looked at me page, like you can use your preferences to filter out who's near me.
Extra choice is only ever a good thing |
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"Didn't think I could be blocked by potential meets because of what's stated on the profile.
I also don't like the fact that cos I have single men blocked they don't show on my 'who's looked at me page'
I'd like to see what men have looked at me. The only thing I can check is who has fabbed my pictures. "
Annie I would guess "everybody" would fab your pictures x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It means that the woman is inundated and want stop the flood gate and do the searching on her own lol. "
It doesn't matter how many times that is explained,some guys will never get it and I honestly believe there aren't enough crayons in the world. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Being able to send a wink regardless if filters should be an option like not receiving messages from non members etc.
Same as you should be able to choose who you see on the who's looked at me page, like you can use your preferences to filter out who's near me.
Extra choice is only ever a good thing "
But then she might get 300 winks and have to check each one out to read the profile to see if she is interested or not 
Must be tough to be female on here having to constantly turn offers down  |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"It is confusing a lot of men. I think the site should stop adding that to a profile when you block them. It doesn't necessarily mean you aren't looking for them. It doesn't add not looking for couples or women, so why men? "
I asked this in the way back when and the answer I got was that it was part of the original software... and it could not be changed, but you can put on a block for couples,mm and ts/tv and will inform them a block is in place |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It means that the woman is inundated and want stop the flood gate and do the searching on her own lol.
It doesn't matter how many times that is explained,some guys will never get it and I honestly believe there aren't enough crayons in the world."
That is right, not many will never understand it lol.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Being able to send a wink regardless if filters should be an option like not receiving messages from non members etc.
Same as you should be able to choose who you see on the who's looked at me page, like you can use your preferences to filter out who's near me.
Extra choice is only ever a good thing
But then she might get 300 winks and have to check each one out to read the profile to see if she is interested or not
Must be tough to be female on here having to constantly turn offers down "
But I only suggested it as an option, so if the person got flooded with winks (which you can only do every 30days) that option could be switched off |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So do most guys understand now that "not looking for single guys" doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking. It just means they have filters on. "
No of course they won't.
You can't have filter on that says one thing, only for it to mean the opposite. It makes no sense at all regardless of your reasons for setting filters. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So do most guys understand now that "not looking for single guys" doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking. It just means they have filters on.
No of course they won't.
You can't have filter on that says one thing, only for it to mean the opposite. It makes no sense at all regardless of your reasons for setting filters. "
Yeah but it's not the profile owners fault it says that it's the site. I don't want it to say not looking for single men because I am looking for them, I just don't want 100's of messages from men that I don't want to meet so I put the block on.
It shouldn't be say anything just cos you've got a block on. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So do most guys understand now that "not looking for single guys" doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking. It just means they have filters on.
No of course they won't.
You can't have filter on that says one thing, only for it to mean the opposite. It makes no sense at all regardless of your reasons for setting filters.
Yeah but it's not the profile owners fault it says that it's the site. I don't want it to say not looking for single men because I am looking for them, I just don't want 100's of messages from men that I don't want to meet so I put the block on.
It shouldn't be say anything just cos you've got a block on. "
How much more do you want the site to do for you though? Find and deliver hand picked guys you would approve of?
You can't realistically expect them to set filters by height, weight, attractiveness, cock size etc. It would be never ending.
It's just something you'll have to accept for better or worse. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So do most guys understand now that "not looking for single guys" doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking. It just means they have filters on. "
But only for some...I'd say the majority who have it aren't looking for single guys. Well that's my conclusion after reading through their profiles. |
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Op, you just write in your profile text that you are looking for single guys, but you have filters on to stop the flood of incoming mail.
The tiny bit at the bottom is then clarified by what you have written yourself. |
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Wish I was a woman sometimes, it would be nice to be overwhelmed with messages and feel slightly wanted! If you stated it on your profile that you were looking for men then surely you would only get interest from men who actually took the time to read your profile, or does that not work either?? |
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"So do most guys understand now that "not looking for single guys" doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking. It just means they have filters on.
But only for some...I'd say the majority who have it aren't looking for single guys. Well that's my conclusion after reading through their profiles."
I don't think you've concluded right. We have that filter on and so do lots of our fab friends. But we play with single guys and our friends do too. Most have the filter on and just switch it off when they want messages.
For many it's a waste of time having the filter off all the time. For example, if someone wanted to meet a guy once a month lets say, why have dozens (or hundreds) of messages every single day, which are useless to both parties?
As the OP said, the only thing is the wording that it puts on your profile isn't quite right, it just means 'incoming messages from single guys not accepted'. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So do most guys understand now that "not looking for single guys" doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking. It just means they have filters on.
No of course they won't.
You can't have filter on that says one thing, only for it to mean the opposite. It makes no sense at all regardless of your reasons for setting filters.
Yeah but it's not the profile owners fault it says that it's the site. I don't want it to say not looking for single men because I am looking for them, I just don't want 100's of messages from men that I don't want to meet so I put the block on.
It shouldn't be say anything just cos you've got a block on.
How much more do you want the site to do for you though? Find and deliver hand picked guys you would approve of?
You can't realistically expect them to set filters by height, weight, attractiveness, cock size etc. It would be never ending.
It's just something you'll have to accept for better or worse. "
Where on this thread have I said I want the site to provide height and penis filters (though it would be good for those in the search options)
I don't expect the site to do anything for me, just wish it wouldn't state not looking for single guys just because I block them from messaging me first.
Is it that hard to understand? |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
We very occasionally meet single guys, but we have been getting quite a few messages from single guys, who haven't read our profile, so we've used the filter and will search for our own guys. |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"So do most guys understand now that "not looking for single guys" doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking. It just means they have filters on.
No of course they won't.
You can't have filter on that says one thing, only for it to mean the opposite. It makes no sense at all regardless of your reasons for setting filters.
Yeah but it's not the profile owners fault it says that it's the site. I don't want it to say not looking for single men because I am looking for them, I just don't want 100's of messages from men that I don't want to meet so I put the block on.
It shouldn't be say anything just cos you've got a block on. "
I have to agree, it would be better if it said nothing.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've just put all my filters on as an experiment. I only usually chat to friends and I mostly mass delete approx 80 messages a day.
PTU xxx
How come your profile says not looking for all the options when mine only shows the single guys thing!?
"
dunno. I just unticked all the boxes in message filter except women. I want a woman.  xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Also why not just have it as the first line of you're profile in caps ?"
Because people don't read profiles? Mine clearly says I'm not looking to hook up with guys yet that's the majority of messages I get, guys wanting to hook up. I don't want to block all single guys because I don't mind a chat with people when we've got something in common. And I'm happy to answer questions. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've just unticked all the boxes in the looking for bit n now it states not looking for single guys. Will meet 30 to 50 year olds. But I'm not meeting anyone.  it is very confussing op. I think you just have to assume no one reads profiles. Keep your filters on n look for yourself. Love your meet request btw xxx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
Is it that hard to understand?
Is it that hard to understand that that's how the site is set up? Regardless whether you like it or not? "
Just disregard the whole point I was making. Perfect example of guys that just hear and see what they want to. |
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
"So are you looking for singles guys then OP?
To me it reads that the OP wishes to look herself and message single guys and not to be overwhelmed with an abundance of messages  "
This is what I understand too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Op, you just write in your profile text that you are looking for single guys, but you have filters on to stop the flood of incoming mail.
The tiny bit at the bottom is then clarified by what you have written yourself."
Probably best way around it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So are you looking for singles guys then OP?
To me it reads that the OP wishes to look herself and message single guys and not to be overwhelmed with an abundance of messages "
It does on here as she's explained. ..However if one looks at a woman's profile and it says clearly... not looking to meet single guys... without asking her as one can't because we're blocked it makes sense not to waste each other's time.....the outof time a guy has to spend to get a cconversation going let alone a meet from it doesn't warrant looking at those profiles. Something fab needs to address I think in some other way. |
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"So are you looking for singles guys then OP?
To me it reads that the OP wishes to look herself and message single guys and not to be overwhelmed with an abundance of messages
It does on here as she's explained. ..However if one looks at a woman's profile and it says clearly... not looking to meet single guys... without asking her as one can't because we're blocked it makes sense not to waste each other's time.....the outof time a guy has to spend to get a cconversation going let alone a meet from it doesn't warrant looking at those profiles. Something fab needs to address I think in some other way."
Fab does solve that in 'search' , you would tick the 'profiles looking for men' box , then only profiles that are looking for guys would pop up. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So are you looking for singles guys then OP?
To me it reads that the OP wishes to look herself and message single guys and not to be overwhelmed with an abundance of messages
It does on here as she's explained. ..However if one looks at a woman's profile and it says clearly... not looking to meet single guys... without asking her as one can't because we're blocked it makes sense not to waste each other's time.....the outof time a guy has to spend to get a cconversation going let alone a meet from it doesn't warrant looking at those profiles. Something fab needs to address I think in some other way.
Fab does solve that in 'search' , you would tick the 'profiles looking for men' box , then only profiles that are looking for guys would pop up."
Ok...I must start ignoring what profiles say then lol.
Would be far simpler if it didn't say not looking single males....just saying. I will admit it automatically flicks a switch off for me as itimplies not interested. Anyway....It works well for me either way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hang on... if the OP has blocked single males... and single males can't message her unless she messages them first... Am I missing something? "
Yes...they don't like it if a single males blocks them to saves wasting time in future searches...which is what I do along with many others I'm assuming. It's another filtering system I guess. |
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By *lighty1Woman
over a year ago
You Dont Need to Know, right now |
It would be good to have this thread in the Fabswingers.com Feedback Forum.
I agree with the OP. I am looking for single guys, but I don't want a mass of (usually crass) first messages from tons of single guys. But if I set my filter and do my own searching, the site adds "not looking for single guys", which is patently NOT TRUE.
To get round this, I have set my filters to age 95-96. This prevents 99.99% of the site from mailing me, unless I mail them first.
However, this solution only works for me because I am not looking for couples or single women. Someone who is looking for couples/single women as well as single guys, can't use this solution.
As we all know, very many people don't read profiles, and having THE SITE add 'not looking for single guys' so near the top of a profile is very unhelpful to all concerned.
OP, if you want to repeat your thread in the site Feedback Forum, I will support it x |
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"
Is it that hard to understand?
Is it that hard to understand that that's how the site is set up? Regardless whether you like it or not?
Just disregard the whole point I was making. Perfect example of guys that just hear and see what they want to. "
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"It would be good to have this thread in the Fabswingers.com Feedback Forum.
I agree with the OP. I am looking for single guys, but I don't want a mass of (usually crass) first messages from tons of single guys. But if I set my filter and do my own searching, the site adds "not looking for single guys", which is patently NOT TRUE.
To get round this, I have set my filters to age 95-96. This prevents 99.99% of the site from mailing me, unless I mail them first.
However, this solution only works for me because I am not looking for couples or single women. Someone who is looking for couples/single women as well as single guys, can't use this solution.
As we all know, very many people don't read profiles, and having THE SITE add 'not looking for single guys' so near the top of a profile is very unhelpful to all concerned.
OP, if you want to repeat your thread in the site Feedback Forum, I will support it x"
If you set the filter, the site does put the words 'not looking for single guys' at the top , that could be better worded. But, what is the actual negative effect?
Single guys can't message you whether they understand that wording or not.
If you message them, and they look at your profile and see those words the site puts on, they'll know you are interested because you messaged them.
It should be easy for the site to fix, but I don't think you are missing out on anything as a result of it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It rarely matters what your profile says...and sometimes how your filters are set, as there are alot if guys that, I can only assume, think they are there by accident or something...have had alot of 2nd hand messages, from guys I have met already, telling me a guy over my age limit has asked them to ask me to message them, or statuses telling me to message whoever wrote it
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can all men on here just understand what that means, it means that the profile owner has their filters on so nobody can message them.
It doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking for single guys, it just means they do their own searching and messaging.
Spread it amongst your homies.
It might actually mean they aren't looking for anyone but I'd say in 90% of cases it's just that the person doesn't want unsolicited mail. "
Thats a lot of assumption right there.
It might be true for you, but not for others.
For example, how do you know they have their filters on?
How do you know they are looking for single guys but want to do their own searching and actually it mean that they literally are not interested?
What makes you think that your speak for everyone with this on their profile?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Can all men on here just understand what that means, it means that the profile owner has their filters on so nobody can message them.
It doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking for single guys, it just means they do their own searching and messaging.
Spread it amongst your homies.
It might actually mean they aren't looking for anyone but I'd say in 90% of cases it's just that the person doesn't want unsolicited mail.
Thats a lot of assumption right there.
It might be true for you, but not for others.
For example, how do you know they have their filters on?
How do you know they are looking for single guys but want to do their own searching and actually it mean that they literally are not interested?
What makes you think that your speak for everyone with this on their profile?
"
Alright fucking chill out. I didn't say I spoke for everyone. Neither did I say that it was the case for all profiles. I am pretty confident though in saying only 10% of (straight female) profiles that have "not looking for single guys" genuinely don't want to meet single guys and the rest don't want the unsolicited mail  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It rarely matters what your profile says...and sometimes how your filters are set, as there are alot if guys that, I can only assume, think they are there by accident or something...have had alot of 2nd hand messages, from guys I have met already, telling me a guy over my age limit has asked them to ask me to message them, or statuses telling me to message whoever wrote it
"
I get this as well! Ive also had single men contact people who I've met previously and ask if they could turn up on my next meet with them!!
I now hide my verifications to stop them getting pestered |
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By *lighty1Woman
over a year ago
You Dont Need to Know, right now |
"Thats a lot of assumption right there.
It might be true for you, but not for others.
For example, how do you know they have their filters on?
How do you know they are looking for single guys but want to do their own searching and actually it mean that they literally are not interested?
What makes you think that your speak for everyone with this on their profile?
"
She speaks for me, and for most of my single female friends.
It's a deficiency of the site, that it automatically adds this line to our profiles. We should at least have the ability to opt-out of this, or, ideally, have an alternative to select "filters set to prevent unsolicited approaches from single men". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can all men on here just understand what that means, it means that the profile owner has their filters on so nobody can message them.
It doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking for single guys, it just means they do their own searching and messaging.
Spread it amongst your homies.
It might actually mean they aren't looking for anyone but I'd say in 90% of cases it's just that the person doesn't want unsolicited mail.
Thats a lot of assumption right there.
It might be true for you, but not for others.
For example, how do you know they have their filters on?
How do you know they are looking for single guys but want to do their own searching and actually it mean that they literally are not interested?
What makes you think that your speak for everyone with this on their profile?
Alright fucking chill out. I didn't say I spoke for everyone. Neither did I say that it was the case for all profiles. I am pretty confident though in saying only 10% of (straight female) profiles that have "not looking for single guys" genuinely don't want to meet single guys and the rest don't want the unsolicited mail "
Wow...He was being polite and asking genuine questions that I'd say most genuine guys who read profile would ask. To reply in such an aggressive manner says alot and definitely glad I've blocked...gut feeling are always goid to listen too.
You say it's only 10 % who who don't want them. Are we then to ignore when fab says... no reply is a no....or do we then start thinking maybe she block deleted...maybe she on holiday....maybe she too busy to reply....maybe she is interested but has too many messages to reply? .... At the nd of the day it kinda only applies to those guys who actually read profiles which may be only a small amount. .. but it probably stops many who do from reading furthet too.
To reply to another poster about if someone with not interested in single males on their profile who message me ...I tend to ignore them as I have thought they're just piss taking/messing about or maybe they're not female.
I guess I'm having my eyes opened maybe ignore what profiles say and just ask and question them now. |
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By *hortieWoman
over a year ago
Northampton |
I have the 'not looking for men' box ticked, because I am utterly fed up of seeing cock pics in my news feed but do not have men blocked from messaging me, so on my profile 'looking for' section, it does not say not looking for single males.
Because tho it clearly says in the first line of my profile I am not looking for men, I do not want to stop all of them messaging me, cause occasionally I will chat with some about xbox, football, or make friends with some Dom/sub types to chat about the lifestyle with no expectations of meeting.
If some guys cannot even read the first line of my profile, I have no qualms whatsoever about deleting their message or blocking them.
Years on Fab have taught me not to stress about men doing what they do best.... chancing their arm.
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By *amissCouple
over a year ago
chelmsford |
We've now blocked single guys messaging mainly because I get a lot of messages, off the back of the forums, when I prefer to keep a discussion in the forum, rather than through private messaging. But just to say they have always been respectful and just want to chat! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Can all men on here just understand what that means, it means that the profile owner has their filters on so nobody can message them.
It doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking for single guys, it just means they do their own searching and messaging.
Spread it amongst your homies.
It might actually mean they aren't looking for anyone but I'd say in 90% of cases it's just that the person doesn't want unsolicited mail.
Thats a lot of assumption right there.
It might be true for you, but not for others.
For example, how do you know they have their filters on?
How do you know they are looking for single guys but want to do their own searching and actually it mean that they literally are not interested?
What makes you think that your speak for everyone with this on their profile?
Alright fucking chill out. I didn't say I spoke for everyone. Neither did I say that it was the case for all profiles. I am pretty confident though in saying only 10% of (straight female) profiles that have "not looking for single guys" genuinely don't want to meet single guys and the rest don't want the unsolicited mail
Wow...He was being polite and asking genuine questions that I'd say most genuine guys who read profile would ask. To reply in such an aggressive manner says alot and definitely glad I've blocked...gut feeling are always goid to listen too.
You say it's only 10 % who who don't want them. Are we then to ignore when fab says... no reply is a no....or do we then start thinking maybe she block deleted...maybe she on holiday....maybe she too busy to reply....maybe she is interested but has too many messages to reply? .... At the nd of the day it kinda only applies to those guys who actually read profiles which may be only a small amount. .. but it probably stops many who do from reading furthet too.
To reply to another poster about if someone with not interested in single males on their profile who message me ...I tend to ignore them as I have thought they're just piss taking/messing about or maybe they're not female.
I guess I'm having my eyes opened maybe ignore what profiles say and just ask and question them now. "
Boo hoo like. Someone who I would never ever meet has blocked me, hurt, I'm hurt.
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By *lighty1Woman
over a year ago
You Dont Need to Know, right now |
"Not all are messaging to try n sleep I generally just like having people to chat to..... 0 that's apparently not aloud these days"
Want to chat? There are chat-rooms for that. Even in the middle of the night, there's always someone about to chat to. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not all are messaging to try n sleep I generally just like having people to chat to..... 0 that's apparently not aloud these days
Want to chat? There are chat-rooms for that. Even in the middle of the night, there's always someone about to chat to."
Be that true for most I am not most and finding people to click with is not to easy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If a gal, couples, or even man has not looking for men then filters are on and a man cannot message.
However that same man CAN respond to a message if sent from the filtered account.
Thats my understanding.
But if the filters are on do the filtered out accounts still appear on whose near or local updates?
I wonder
Dave  |
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By *lighty1Woman
over a year ago
You Dont Need to Know, right now |
"Am I the only one who finds it quite a compliment to get a message from a 'not looking for single guys' person? "
It IS a compliment. It means that they have considered all the available pool of profiles, and find that yours is good enough to open a comms line with. I wish more men would see it this way!
Unfortunately some men take a 'tit for tat' approach, and won't consider people who have this on their profile. If a lady/couple won't let the man make the first move, he won't respond to their approach.
Talk about cutting their nose off too spite their face! Worse than that, men who think like this are saying "I want you to accept mails from bucket-loads of single men, and then pick me out of the pack" - ignoring the fact that their message is one of hundred unsolicited messages received, and their chances of being noticed are slim.
You carry on taking it as a compliment - that is the right attitude! x |
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"If a gal, couples, or even man has not looking for men then filters are on and a man cannot message.
However that same man CAN respond to a message if sent from the filtered account.
Thats my understanding.
But if the filters are on do the filtered out accounts still appear on whose near or local updates?
I wonder
Dave "
Who's near everybody shows up, unless you click 'only those who match your preferences'
Local updates and Looked at me ignores those who you have filtered. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If a gal, couples, or even man has not looking for men then filters are on and a man cannot message.
However that same man CAN respond to a message if sent from the filtered account.
Thats my understanding.
But if the filters are on do the filtered out accounts still appear on whose near or local updates?
I wonder
Dave
Who's near everybody shows up, unless you click 'only those who match your preferences'
Local updates and Looked at me ignores those who you have filtered."
Thanks. Although local updates filter some out am sure. Never see blokes in my local updates. |
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"I
Who's near everybody shows up, unless you click 'only those who match your preferences'
Local updates and Looked at me ignores those who you have filtered.
Thanks. Although local updates filter some out am sure. Never see blokes in my local updates. "
That's right, that's what I said |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am I the only one who finds it quite a compliment to get a message from a 'not looking for single guys' person?
It IS a compliment. It means that they have considered all the available pool of profiles, and find that yours is good enough to open a comms line with. I wish more men would see it this way!
Unfortunately some men take a 'tit for tat' approach, and won't consider people who have this on their profile. If a lady/couple won't let the man make the first move, he won't respond to their approach.
Talk about cutting their nose off too spite their face! Worse than that, men who think like this are saying "I want you to accept mails from bucket-loads of single men, and then pick me out of the pack" - ignoring the fact that their message is one of hundred unsolicited messages received, and their chances of being noticed are slim.
You carry on taking it as a compliment - that is the right attitude! x "
I agree
I never even considered that men would block me because i sometimes put my filters up.
Every day is a School day. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Am I the only one who finds it quite a compliment to get a message from a 'not looking for single guys' person?
It IS a compliment. It means that they have considered all the available pool of profiles, and find that yours is good enough to open a comms line with. I wish more men would see it this way!
Unfortunately some men take a 'tit for tat' approach, and won't consider people who have this on their profile. If a lady/couple won't let the man make the first move, he won't respond to their approach.
Talk about cutting their nose off too spite their face! Worse than that, men who think like this are saying "I want you to accept mails from bucket-loads of single men, and then pick me out of the pack" - ignoring the fact that their message is one of hundred unsolicited messages received, and their chances of being noticed are slim.
You carry on taking it as a compliment - that is the right attitude! x "
I think you ladies have lost the point. ... there's nothing spiteful at all. It's a filter as with many other things in a profile. If it says not looking for single me when you're searching it's a nuisance how many say it so... to filter those people out because ultimately I'm trying to find someone who is looking for single guys and secondly whom I can mesage at the time I'm looking ( and if you have that in your profile then I cannot message so it goes to say Ill not be interested then) It's nothing personal and nothing spiteful in anyway. As for ladida who is so eloquent with her words...i blocked her 6 months ago at least ... because of the way she comes across on the forums...and not because of the not looking for single me bit.... Hope that clears it up and a bit more maturity and decorum returns to the thread. As I and others have said it should be addressed by fab admin.... its obviously an issue as it keeps being raised...and the very people it was put in place to help out are the ones who don't like it because it actually gives the wrong message. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Can all men on here just understand what that means, it means that the profile owner has their filters on so nobody can message them.
It doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking for single guys, it just means they do their own searching and messaging.
Spread it amongst your homies.
It might actually mean they aren't looking for anyone but I'd say in 90% of cases it's just that the person doesn't want unsolicited mail. "
use the filters Miss look at me |
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"Can all men on here just understand what that means, it means that the profile owner has their filters on so nobody can message them.
It doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking for single guys, it just means they do their own searching and messaging.
Spread it amongst your homies.
It might actually mean they aren't looking for anyone but I'd say in 90% of cases it's just that the person doesn't want unsolicited mail. "
it's the same thing as straight on profiles for dudes
Not fab straight that is |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Can all men on here just understand what that means, it means that the profile owner has their filters on so nobody can message them.
It doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking for single guys, it just means they do their own searching and messaging.
Spread it amongst your homies.
It might actually mean they aren't looking for anyone but I'd say in 90% of cases it's just that the person doesn't want unsolicited mail. use the filters Miss look at me "
What the actual fuck are you on about mate? My filters are in hence the whole point of this thread. It's to tell people who keep questioning me when I say I am looking for single men even though my profile (through no fault of my own) says not looking for single men.
It's to explain that the sentence is automatically put on your profile when you apply your filters and doesn't necessarily mean that I'm not looking.
Sorry like but I don't know why guys think it's ok to give me shit just because I'm trying to explain something. |
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"Can all men on here just understand what that means, it means that the profile owner has their filters on so nobody can message them.
It doesn't necessarily mean they aren't looking for single guys, it just means they do their own searching and messaging.
Spread it amongst your homies.
It might actually mean they aren't looking for anyone but I'd say in 90% of cases it's just that the person doesn't want unsolicited mail. use the filters Miss look at me
What the actual fuck are you on about mate? My filters are in hence the whole point of this thread. It's to tell people who keep questioning me when I say I am looking for single men even though my profile (through no fault of my own) says not looking for single men.
It's to explain that the sentence is automatically put on your profile when you apply your filters and doesn't necessarily mean that I'm not looking.
Sorry like but I don't know why guys think it's ok to give me shit just because I'm trying to explain something. "
Stop moaning you've got great tits and don't need to care x |
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