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Past My Sell By Date....
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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..... I believe I can't pull the type of men that I fancy physically. It doesn't bother me as it's just life and I knew I couldn't stay young and pretty(ish) forever to feel comfortable enough to do so. I have no desire to be mutton.
But having a taste in certain types of men doesn't change as you age. How do you stop comparing men (who are looking for clapped out old models like me, anyway) to the younger bodies that turn you on? You don't go to bed loving Led Zep then wake up fancying some Perry Como. It's not fair on men of my peer group either,since I've 'gone to seed' to refuse them because I don't fancy their bodies.
I wonder if the time is dawning that I should be hanging up my swinging boots?
This is not a thread fishing for compliments but a genuine question as to when you feel it might be time to call it a day? Not give up sex - that will never happen, for me anyway, while I can help it.
What will make you give up swinging? |
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"..... I believe I can't pull the type of men that I fancy physically. It doesn't bother me as it's just life and I knew I couldn't stay young and pretty(ish) forever to feel comfortable enough to do so. I have no desire to be mutton.
But having a taste in certain types of men doesn't change as you age. How do you stop comparing men (who are looking for clapped out old models like me, anyway) to the younger bodies that turn you on? You don't go to bed loving Led Zep then wake up fancying some Perry Como. It's not fair on men of my peer group either,since I've 'gone to seed' to refuse them because I don't fancy their bodies.
I wonder if the time is dawning that I should be hanging up my swinging boots?
This is not a thread fishing for compliments but a genuine question as to when you feel it might be time to call it a day? Not give up sex - that will never happen, for me anyway, while I can help it.
What will make you give up swinging?"
Just look for the guys that have looked after themselves there are some !!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think you know when to give most things its more if you are going to listen to those inner feelings or if after thinking about it you decide to keep with it a bit longer. In the end if you are not having fun you give it a rest or move on.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"..... I believe I can't pull the type of men that I fancy physically. It doesn't bother me as it's just life and I knew I couldn't stay young and pretty(ish) forever to feel comfortable enough to do so. I have no desire to be mutton.
But having a taste in certain types of men doesn't change as you age. How do you stop comparing men (who are looking for clapped out old models like me, anyway) to the younger bodies that turn you on? You don't go to bed loving Led Zep then wake up fancying some Perry Como. It's not fair on men of my peer group either,since I've 'gone to seed' to refuse them because I don't fancy their bodies.
I wonder if the time is dawning that I should be hanging up my swinging boots?
This is not a thread fishing for compliments but a genuine question as to when you feel it might be time to call it a day? Not give up sex - that will never happen, for me anyway, while I can help it.
What will make you give up swinging?
Just look for the guys that have looked after themselves there are some !!!"
yep I always tend to as Im not talking 'younger men' Im talkign men out of my league who are pulling the younger ones  I am VERY happy with my sex life, believe me.
As another poster has put it if you're happy with what you;re doing then keep on doing it.
Im pondering the eventuality of stopping swinging - not declaring thats what Im about to do any day soon |
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Well im supposed to be on a sabbatical for 6 months although that should be rephrased to not actively looking. Not cause im getting old just wanted to concentrate on other stuff.
Guess i will be swinging until its no longer fun.
Jay is 68 and has had more meets this year than me, both with couples and guys and they have all been my age or younger and some of them repeat meets. So for me it will be when its no longer fun. For him i think it will be when they nail the lid down |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Don't you dare give up, I was older when I Started swinging than you are now"
As I said in pm to a guy just now, its not that anyone has to stop swinging through lack of offers - its what you prefer your swinging partner to look like. In order to keep swinging I need an incentive and thats a hot toned body for me personally as awoman in my circumstances |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"..... I believe I can't pull the type of men that I fancy physically. It doesn't bother me as it's just life and I knew I couldn't stay young and pretty(ish) forever to feel comfortable enough to do so. I have no desire to be mutton.
But having a taste in certain types of men doesn't change as you age. How do you stop comparing men (who are looking for clapped out old models like me, anyway) to the younger bodies that turn you on? You don't go to bed loving Led Zep then wake up fancying some Perry Como. It's not fair on men of my peer group either,since I've 'gone to seed' to refuse them because I don't fancy their bodies.
I wonder if the time is dawning that I should be hanging up my swinging boots?
This is not a thread fishing for compliments but a genuine question as to when you feel it might be time to call it a day? Not give up sex - that will never happen, for me anyway, while I can help it.
What will make you give up swinging?"
Being overweight, hairy, lightly bearded, bald, bespectacled I have got plenty of negatives going on as far as many peoples sexual ideals go.
That said, I am a 'niche' market and I am more than happy to be.
Not everyone wants a muscled young thing but thankfully some muscled young things want a bit of older chubby luv - so bring em on !
Roll on 50 when I can convincingly say 'Come to Daddy'  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"where is the point where i give up swinging...
the point where i don't enjoy it anymore.... it really is that simple for me....
"
Of course everyone will say that but can you give examples of why it may become tedious or impossible? Considering your still a very young man it will not have crossed your mind yet that some women eventually are 'out of your league' same as it dawned on me - who is considerably more older Its the circumstances people do the things they do that I like to read about... I suspect knowing what I have gleaned from you and your posts, that if you find a partner and get cosied up and shes not same frame of mind then thats it for you - am I right?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Your options may be limited but the educated ones will appreciate your experience. Going to social gatherings and being friendly outgoing an sexy may persuade the uninitiated.
People are all different. I've been turned down for being too tall! Some like the larger body, some the skinny. Some the younger, some the older.
Just hang on to your young outlook. I know some people who are old at 35 and have no fun and some much older than me who are very sexually active. For me it just keeps getting better. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I totally get what your saying.. My Master has the same issues.. He likes younger women.. I am old by his normal standards..
But just Lately My Master has decided that its getting very hard and rare for him to get a lady that meets his standards.. to be fair that would be 22 at oldest, size 10, and have a look that I would find hard to explain but I know it when I see it..
Now my Master keeps in very good shape for his years.. but he is now accepting that most ladies we contact wont want to play with a man that old.. but we are not hanging up our shoes.. as every so often the right lady does come along and I get to know that my Master has really enjoyed himself.
So I think that the best thing would be to say that there will always be guys out there who you will fancy..and that will be interested in you..
Oh and falling that I will pay for a nice younger lady for him.. and sit back and enjoy the show.
Cali |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Hmmmm sorry and all that but if I had to pay for sex not only would I hang up my boots I'd shoot myself. That is so far beyond my boundaries ... but if its someones thing that works then so be it... for them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hmmmm sorry and all that but if I had to pay for sex not only would I hang up my boots I'd shoot myself. That is so far beyond my boundaries ... but if its someones thing that works then so be it... for them."
lol for us its just easier to sort.. we dont even have to get to know her.. lol
However for me personally I couldnt imagine paying for a guy..
cali |
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The whole point of me being here is so I can fuck people who are out of my league. If they were in my league I'd just nip in town and pull a few.
As a single I guess the only thing which would make me want to hang up my swinging boots is... not finding it fun anymore. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Your options may be limited but the educated ones will appreciate your experience. Going to social gatherings and being friendly outgoing an sexy may persuade the uninitiated.
People are all different. I've been turned down for being too tall! Some like the larger body, some the skinny. Some the younger, some the older.
Just hang on to your young outlook. I know some people who are old at 35 and have no fun and some much older than me who are very sexually active. For me it just keeps getting better."
I think it got better for me too as I got older and more experienced with life. I think I may have peaked now though but still desire the same turn ons. I know how to socialise and turn men on I just don't want to be an old despo and will (do) accept that reality bites |
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Just remember the saying you are as young as you feel, so i am definately not giving up yet at 48, i am having more fun now than i did in my 20,s and 30,s i think confidence has a lot to do with it, the older the more confidant you are and that makes sex fantastic
x sue |
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"Your options may be limited but the educated ones will appreciate your experience. Going to social gatherings and being friendly outgoing an sexy may persuade the uninitiated.
People are all different. I've been turned down for being too tall! Some like the larger body, some the skinny. Some the younger, some the older.
Just hang on to your young outlook. I know some people who are old at 35 and have no fun and some much older than me who are very sexually active. For me it just keeps getting better.
I think it got better for me too as I got older and more experienced with life. I think I may have peaked now though but still desire the same turn ons. I know how to socialise and turn men on I just don't want to be an old despo and will (do) accept that reality bites "
I reckon ive had more gorgous looking guys message me as ive got older, yes some want to experience a mature woman but im not convinced all of them do |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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we often get messages from hard bodied young guys as a couple so i find it a little odd that as a single woman your struggling to find them
just beacuase they are young and toned does not mean they are out of your league at all as every single one of us has different tastes plenty of younger guys like an older lady and to be perfectly honest i think there is a huge difference between male and female expectatios when it comes to bodies
warning sweeping generalisation coming here
women tend to prefer guys to be toned whereas guys tend to be more forgiving of wobbliness and wrinkles
please don't hang me i did warn you it was a sweeping generalisation 
i bet that even in another 10 years time you will still get pm's from hard bodies young uns so i doubt you'll need to hang up ya boots
and may i add i'm not looking for hard bodied young uns i prefer a twinkle in the eye and a good bit of banter to a body form |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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its not as bad for me BUT i find alot of women my age look bags older than me. alot of it is down to me/my fam ageing very, very well. still it does pee me off at times.
i think u just have to find someone in ur age group that times been kind to and who has looked after themselves. there are genetic freaks out there of all ages |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"we often get messages from hard bodied young guys as a couple so i find it a little odd that as a single woman your struggling to find them
just beacuase they are young and toned does not mean they are out of your league at all as every single one of us has different tastes plenty of younger guys like an older lady and to be perfectly honest i think there is a huge difference between male and female expectatios when it comes to bodies
warning sweeping generalisation coming here
women tend to prefer guys to be toned whereas guys tend to be more forgiving of wobbliness and wrinkles
please don't hang me i did warn you it was a sweeping generalisation
i bet that even in another 10 years time you will still get pm's from hard bodies young uns so i doubt you'll need to hang up ya boots
and may i add i'm not looking for hard bodied young uns i prefer a twinkle in the eye and a good bit of banter to a body form "
I enjoy all opinions and certainly dont mind yours lol xxx Thing is I dont go for young guys - youre right they're well up for it with older women... So I have a bit of a strict age range ... I like older men with good 'younger looking' bodies that have matured and been looked after - same as I looked after myself. Ive always liked this look. My tastes will never change but it comes to the point where Ive realised what I get from swinging is going to be harder to achieve with the men who turn me on hence the 'past my sell by date' not lack of offers from older or younger - its lack of incentive to keep swinging with those who do not turn you on..... so not all about the young and toned. I like men with long hair too and that ideal is practically a happy memory now!! I know Ill never see that look on a man much nowadays I was just saying your body may change but your turn on tastes tend to stay the same and thats with a group of men who I will no longer be able to attract in time...
Am loving the debate and points of _iew xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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ahha i misread your post then i do appologise
i see where your coming from yes it is harder to find older guys that are toned but they are out there
xxxxxxxxxx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"i was told the other day to take it when i can get it with who ever offers as am not getting any younger..... what a cheek i have a few good friends who i meet on a reg basis  "
Cruel! but its comments like this that sow the seeds isn't it? If Im honest Ive been to a couple of weddings and parties lately and the tables with the handsome late thirties early forties (who look bored with their women that seem to sit around in wee huddles talking about nothing but domestics) always catch my eye. So I openly flirt.
Of late they havent been responding with meaningful looks or 'at the bar' flirtiness. So thats what I mean when I say reality bites... |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"i havent even started "swinging" yet! lol "
Me neither
Seriously? I d stop when I stop enjoying it..., when I dont get the attention anymore and generally when my other interests take over my time and somehow I dont think this is going to be for some time to come... pardon the pun;-) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"..... I believe I can't pull the type of men that I fancy physically. It doesn't bother me as it's just life and I knew I couldn't stay young and pretty(ish) forever to feel comfortable enough to do so. I have no desire to be mutton.
But having a taste in certain types of men doesn't change as you age. How do you stop comparing men (who are looking for clapped out old models like me, anyway) to the younger bodies that turn you on? You don't go to bed loving Led Zep then wake up fancying some Perry Como. It's not fair on men of my peer group either,since I've 'gone to seed' to refuse them because I don't fancy their bodies.
I wonder if the time is dawning that I should be hanging up my swinging boots?
This is not a thread fishing for compliments but a genuine question as to when you feel it might be time to call it a day? Not give up sex - that will never happen, for me anyway, while I can help it.
What will make you give up swinging?"
I can sympathise with you on this. I thought it was because I'm getting fussy, but it seems the ladies I like don't fancy me and the ones that do, I'm not attracted too.
We haven't played for ages, well, since late last year, and I've thought many times that perhaps we wont get to play again.
Kate says she's not bothered one little bit whether we do or not.
I love the forums, so I'm here for that, and we do correspond regularly with Fab friends.
I don't think it's an age thing though, because we get people of all ages mailing us.
We're going to a party at the weekend so we'll see how we get on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"..... I believe I can't pull the type of men that I fancy physically. It doesn't bother me as it's just life and I knew I couldn't stay young and pretty(ish) forever to feel comfortable enough to do so. I have no desire to be mutton.
But having a taste in certain types of men doesn't change as you age. How do you stop comparing men (who are looking for clapped out old models like me, anyway) to the younger bodies that turn you on? You don't go to bed loving Led Zep then wake up fancying some Perry Como. It's not fair on men of my peer group either,since I've 'gone to seed' to refuse them because I don't fancy their bodies.
I wonder if the time is dawning that I should be hanging up my swinging boots?
This is not a thread fishing for compliments but a genuine question as to when you feel it might be time to call it a day? Not give up sex - that will never happen, for me anyway, while I can help it.
What will make you give up swinging?"
When you do finally give it up you can pass the time by making suits for pearly kings |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have found that what I fancy physically has been taking 2nd place in my sex life for the last year or so. I am becoming far more attracted to the cerebral. A boy have I met some interesting and highly attractive minds. |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
I agree with Thatgirl - the priorities, the likes and dislikes have changed a bit over the last few years and for me the mind is infinitily more important than the biceps/triceps proportion... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i tend to go for personality rather than looks if a guy makes me feel at ease and has a good sense of humour that does it for me io never judge people on looks aw xx  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"..... I believe I can't pull the type of men that I fancy physically....
In the words of Henry Ford "whether you think you can or whether you think you can't, you're right"
"
I like that saying! I must admit I've been having the same debate with myself recently so thanks to the OP for posting this. Ms |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"i tend to go for personality rather than looks if a guy makes me feel at ease and has a good sense of humour that does it for me io never judge people on looks aw xx "
Yeah its never been an either or for me I like intelligent people too but sexually I like them pleasing on the eye as its NSA and for sexual gratification first - thats why I seek sex from strangers.
My friends family and colleagues are who I hang around with for an love and cerebral buzz.
If I want to replace sex for a intelligent conversation then I won't be looking for that anywhere but offline or on the non sexual websites I enjoy and I have my fair share of interesting intelligent chatmates on this site too - but I aint gonna sleep with any of them necessarily |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i tend to go for personality rather than looks if a guy makes me feel at ease and has a good sense of humour that does it for me io never judge people on looks aw xx "
Never? Nsa sex would not work for me without some degree of physical attraction. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"..... I believe I can't pull the type of men that I fancy physically....
In the words of Henry Ford "whether you think you can or whether you think you can't, you're right"
"
Thats going to be my motto for this site forever now! Thanks, |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you have an expiry date on your bum that will tell you when you have to give up. If you don't have one you can keep going till you can tuck your nipples in your waist band and long after |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"aw you are def in to looks then what ever happened to not juding peole by theire cover xx"
Yes I am into looks.
I have always found it hard to accept that people on a swinging site looking for nsa put no value on physical attraction.
I agree personality is important, but to suggest that people don't 'judge' their attraction to another person at least partly on 'looks' seems at the very least disingenuous. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How old are the oldest swingers here ? are there any past 60 or does it all stop then.Are they still well kept and fit ?"
Oldest I've met was 78 and still as horny as hell! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"im not the kind of person that is vain i like to give a person a chance doesnt harm any one to have a meet as in socialise xxx
"
I'm not sure what you mean, for clarity, are you saying you have nsa sex with people you have no physically attractive for?
I will attempt to 'socialise' with almost anyone, but sex is another matter. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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That's it in a nutshell Cherche, I share the dilemma.
First to admit I'm no oil painting, but I still love the look of the fit thirties to forties guys, so find it harder and harder to find many men my own age to whom I'm attracted.
As Polo said, I'm here to fulfil the fantasy, reality I can get elsewhere off this site.
I know my mail box has a steady stream of young (too young for my taste) men contacting me, but I don't play with them and really do wonder with what they see why they even mail me.
I don't want to be seen as an easy shag for them, especially when I know many of them are so horned up they have the attitude if it's warm wet and tight, poke it.
So do I stay looking for those gorgeous late thirty/forty something's or give it up before I become that easy old shag?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"That's it in a nutshell Cherche, I share the dilemma.
First to admit I'm no oil painting, but I still love the look of the fit thirties to forties guys, so find it harder and harder to find many men my own age to whom I'm attracted.
As Polo said, I'm here to fulfil the fantasy, reality I can get elsewhere off this site.
I know my mail box has a steady stream of young (too young for my taste) men contacting me, but I don't play with them and really do wonder with what they see why they even mail me.
I don't want to be seen as an easy shag for them, especially when I know many of them are so horned up they have the attitude if it's warm wet and tight, poke it.
So do I stay looking for those gorgeous late thirty/forty something's or give it up before I become that easy old shag?
"
Those are exactly my feelings Laine. It's recognising when you've peaked. For me life is off the internet and all of the important relationships and established friendships are there. Whenever I write about anything about sex its about online sex and playmates. Nobody on this site needs to know about anyones offline life but meeting online sex partners should be happy to know you're with them because there's an attraction not because you or indeed they are desperate.
It isnt a brains versus brawn thread or a lack of confidence one either - some like intellect others like physical looks, its how comfortable are you in your swinging skin once you reach a certain age.
I am sure a lot of younger swingers posting at this time in their lives will question themselves when they get to mine. I question myself about all sorts of things that are age appropriate. Down to the colour of my lipstick to the length of skirt and height of heel. As I say - I never want to be regarded as mutton. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm off to the gym to tone up for threesome with Jech and Laine
This old fooker ain't dead yet
huh!!! like that is it, eh????  "
You're only a young whipper-snapper yet girly, plenty time for you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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young is not synonymous with pretty. beauty is ageless, just take a look on mature women sites and you will see many extremely beautiful classic models.
That is how I see myself, classic, or vintage if you like. I find I can attract young men that I fancy if I am so inclined but you may have to make the first move if you sense some interest as they won't always have the confidence to approach a "classic" lady.
There is no reason why your body should go to seed. All it takes is regular exercise and walking everyday will start you off. If you invest in one of those step machines and cycle too you will find it "lifts" bits back into position.
Hang up your boots? Only if you are bored with it all. Otherwise, rock on! xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I take breaks life gets in the way but would not give it up completely I enjoy it too much not just sexual but the social aspect. Would only give it up if I found a serious relationship to build foundations or if it was no longer fun. But would always be there in the back of my mind. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Some very interesting points of _iew here. I really liked the wide spectrum of all ages saying how it is for them at this moment in time.
Thank you for joining in |
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"Some very interesting points of _iew here. I really liked the wide spectrum of all ages saying how it is for them at this moment in time.
Thank you for joining in "
Oh and my age is verrrrrrrrrrrrrry wide lol |
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By *andKCouple
over a year ago
Norfolk |
"Some very interesting points of _iew here. I really liked the wide spectrum of all ages saying how it is for them at this moment in time.
Thank you for joining in "
have to say at 47 you are a spring chicken to some (and from what I can see a very nice one too ) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Some very interesting points of _iew here. I really liked the wide spectrum of all ages saying how it is for them at this moment in time.
Thank you for joining in
have to say at 47 you are a spring chicken to some (and from what I can see a very nice one too )"
I'm repeating myself but not everyone reads from the top xxx - its not me I have any doubts about - I know my own sexuality and what Im capable of its just the men I find physically attractive are still in the age group I have always fancied. The individual ages but the attributes apply to every man reaching that point and so are getting further and further out of my grasp as I age. The point in swinging for me is the physical so its the reality biting that I can't pull what I want or used to be able to pull without feeling like I might be 'out of my league' so to speak xxxxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some very interesting points of _iew here. I really liked the wide spectrum of all ages saying how it is for them at this moment in time.
Thank you for joining in
have to say at 47 you are a spring chicken to some (and from what I can see a very nice one too )
I'm repeating myself but not everyone reads from the top xxx - its not me I have any doubts about - I know my own sexuality and what Im capable of its just the men I find physically attractive are still in the age group I have always fancied. The individual ages but the attributes apply to every man reaching that point and so are getting further and further out of my grasp as I age. The point in swinging for me is the physical so its the reality biting that I can't pull what I want or used to be able to pull without feeling like I might be 'out of my league' so to speak xxxxx"
i might not be in the top half of the table any more but am not ready to be relegated outta the premier league just yet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think both of us will give up when it doesn't give us the thrill it does now. With there being an age gap, we're both fully aware of age limits etc. Often one of us will make it and one won't. To us though attraction is about more than age, especially when you get to know someone. I think although I'm younger I may want to give up first - i've been doing it for a shorter period of time, so it's less of a life style choice and more novel/take it or leave it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Havin been on the scene since i was 17 through my Bi side and being dragged back kickin and screamin ta their wives lol
Im now in a position where im moving more ta the social side and away from the physical
I will never leave the scene though cause i have no vanilla friends at all and have never wanted any
But my love life is more than enough fa me at the min anyway
I do still play and probably will do fa a while but not as much now xx |
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I can completely understand what you are saying and I have said the same to my partner. When I feel that we cant meet the guys we want to we wont be swinging anymore. I dont want a mercy shag or a desperate for shag guy or a guy who just wants the novelty of an older woman no matter what.... eeek! We are also extremely selective like you but are willing to meet younger and infact prefer it which makes it easier. Of course, goes without saying that if it doesnt work for our relationship anymore we will throw in the wet towel. Its a hard thing to contemplate but we have so much more that not the end of the world, although maybe a temporary confidence knock... one I can get over Im sure.
Mistress x |
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