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Married but have separate bank accounts
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Its as if they have something to hide from each other.
It just feels strange to us?"
On the other had, we trust each other enough not to feel the other one might be hiding something.  |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
It's very sensible, apart from anything else it spreads the risk.
Love is wonderful, and sharing everything is great but when it goes bad money is the thing that will be fought over.
For women experiencing domestic abuse, financial coercion and control is one of the things that keeps them stuck in the relationship.
If you love your partner, set their bank account free.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My parents had separate bank accounts as my dad was crap with money and my mum didn't want him pinching hers"
This. I am terrible with money so it's for the best for both  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have quite a few friends but have just discovered from our set of friends that they have separate bank accounts?
How is that being a couple?
Views please."
I would never ever have a joint bank account again... dont see how being financially independent is not being a couple. We live completely seperately yet still are a couple x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Married, both have single bank accounts,joint account, single accounts on here , joint account too... I'm trying to understand why is such a conundrum op?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I'd had a separate bank account from my ex we might of lasted longer then we did as money ended up being bone of contention between us. I don't cry about it anymore tho.
PTU xxx |
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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago
yumsville |
How is having joint accounts a status of being a couple. You are single you have an account but then get married so should have only joint accounts? It seems dangerous if one party has sending habits the other doesn't. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We've had a joint account, but we were shit together so we went back to having separate accounts.
Mr is salaried so he pays the mortgage, sky, phone bills etc, and I'm paid weekly so I get the week to week shopping, school lunches, electricity etc.
There are no trust issues between us in any respects of our lives, this just works better for us x |
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It was just a shock to us as we have had a joint account since we bought our first house together back in the 80's.
We assumed that this was the norm, but obviously not.
Just threw it out there to get your feedback. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have both a joint one and the wife has her own. It's quite handy because when either of us are down to rock bottom, the other always has a few quid left until pay day.
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After my divorce and being left with £47 cos she cleaned the lot out of the joint accounts before she left I would never ever ever again have anything in joint names with a partner, for those of you who do then it's only a matter of time before it goes from all fine to ripoffed time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Would never have a joint account again, my ex husband quizzed me if I took £10 from the account and made me feel like I was stealing !!
I also worked full time and paid into the account !! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Me and my ex had our own accounts and a joint account. The joint account we both put a bit into to cover bills and shopping. What we had left was ours
We went to work for it so could do with it as we pleased. Didn't make us any less of a couple.
I would never join all my money with a partner, I work long hours and too hard to just give it away |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't think I've ever considered having seperate bank accounts in my married relationship. It doesn't really mesh with how I see my marriage.
But I have read that having separate accounts is a growing trend in modern relationships and that more people have some form of separate accounts (either completely separate or both joint and separate) than have soley joint accounts. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm married, we have joint accounts that we both fund for bills, shopping and savings etc and we also have our own current accounts that our salaries go in to and our own 'spending money'. We know how much we get paid each month and contribute to the joint accounts so that we're both left with the same 'own money' each month and we spend our own money as we both see fit!
Simples! |
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"After my divorce and being left with £47 cos she cleaned the lot out of the joint accounts before she left I would never ever ever again have anything in joint names with a partner, for those of you who do then it's only a matter of time before it goes from all fine to ripoffed time "
I suppose thinking about it, I do have a joint account, me and katie although I know who the most expensive tastes in clothes and shoes!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't see why it's anyone else's business how someone manages their finances, and certainly don't see that there's any correlation between shared finances and a strong marriage.
I don't really understand why you'd need a shared account and arguably there's a greater trust demonstrated when you don't feel you have to be able to keep tabs on what your other half is spending/buying. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We share the bills and have our own accounts. Nothing to do with hiding anything It's just convenient for us. It was a pain in the arse when we got married and got cheques made out to both of us. We had to open a joint account for that. And haven't used it since. I quite like that after the bills have been paid the money in my account is mine. I spend it on what I want and hubby does likewise. I can't understand why a couple would prefer a joint account. .unless they didn't trust their partner and had to keep tabs on them. |
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Seperate accounts all the way.
Men don't appreciate paying half of the Nth pair of shoes and women don't appreciate paying half of the tip you gave the masseuse for the happy ending.
Why invent problems that you don't need to have!?  |
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"We have quite a few friends but have just discovered from our set of friends that they have separate bank accounts?
How is that being a couple?
Views please."
..... I was married once and we only had one bank account....."HERS" ! |
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"We have quite a few friends but have just discovered from our set of friends that they have separate bank accounts?
How is that being a couple?
Views please...... I was married once and we only had one bank account....."HERS" !"
made me chuckle |
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In my first marriage we had separate accounts and a joint account, we both pu X amount a month into the joint account and paid the bills out of that.
This time we both have our own account and no joint one, no issues and saves on bank charges |
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"Its as if they have something to hide from each other.
It just feels strange to us?"
Not at all.
Each give proportionate to their salary what it takes to keep the house going.
Then they have their own money.
It doesn't mean they are being deceitful.
No one said that one doesn't know what the other has got.
I'd find it bloody odd to have to ask a partner for money to buy them a gift or do something as an individual.
People should never lose their individuality even when being half of a very strong relationship. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Its as if they have something to hide from each other.
It just feels strange to us?
On the other had, we trust each other enough not to feel the other one might be hiding something. "
This
Why the need to feel you have to have joint accounts?
We are individuals.. you dont have a joint account with your children yet you love them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This isn't surprising to me at all, I know alot of people who have 3 accounts between them, one for the joint bills in both names and one for the rest of their money in each of their names, it is fairly common these days. I don't see what the problem is with it personally, people do things their way and feel happy that way then there is no issue right? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm married, we have joint accounts that we both fund for bills, shopping and savings etc and we also have our own current accounts that our salaries go in to and our own 'spending money'. We know how much we get paid each month and contribute to the joint accounts so that we're both left with the same 'own money' each month and we spend our own money as we both see fit!
Simples! "
Same here |
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It's still being a couple as the finances are still pooled and the mortgage is a joint one. 