FabSwingers.com
 

FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Foof fails

Foof fails

Jump to: Newest in thread

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek

Following on from the man wang thread which thus far none of them have been brave enough to comment on, what embarrassing or painful foof moments have we had ladies?

I once went at it for too long with my wand. Actually friction burned my left flap.

That hurt like a bitch.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *huckzMan  over a year ago

spalding


"Following on from the man wang thread which thus far none of them have been brave enough to comment on, what embarrassing or painful foof moments have we had ladies?

I once went at it for too long with my wand. Actually friction burned my left flap.

That hurt like a bitch."

....flap attack springs to mind lol

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Following on from the man wang thread which thus far none of them have been brave enough to comment on, what embarrassing or painful foof moments have we had ladies?

I once went at it for too long with my wand. Actually friction burned my left flap.

That hurt like a bitch."

Ouch! Not easy to put a plaster on there. I hope you weren't out of action for too long.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Following on from the man wang thread which thus far none of them have been brave enough to comment on, what embarrassing or painful foof moments have we had ladies?

I once went at it for too long with my wand. Actually friction burned my left flap.

That hurt like a bitch.

Ouch! Not easy to put a plaster on there. I hope you weren't out of action for too long."

Long enough!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *huckzMan  over a year ago

spalding


"Following on from the man wang thread which thus far none of them have been brave enough to comment on, what embarrassing or painful foof moments have we had ladies?

I once went at it for too long with my wand. Actually friction burned my left flap.

That hurt like a bitch......

Ouch! Not easy to put a plaster on there. I hope you weren't out of action for too long.

Long enough!"

....now if you had used your wand after the event and said izzy wizzy lets get busy.....your foof flap as you put it would have been fine lol

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *iss.HoneyWoman  over a year ago

...

I'm not the most delicate person when shaving, think sheep shearing.

Once there was a slip of the blade it hurt to wee for a few days

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I once pulled my pants up without putting the wings of the pad down

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Bought a new flogger and after having a play with it, mr was a bit over zealous and I ended up very red, and swollen and sore. X

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"I'm not the most delicate person when shaving, think sheep shearing.

Once there was a slip of the blade it hurt to wee for a few days "

I hear ya on that one, especially when in a rush.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"I once pulled my pants up without putting the wings of the pad down "

Ahhh, I won't say I ALWAYS do it, but it's happened more than once!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Bought a new flogger and after having a play with it, mr was a bit over zealous and I ended up very red, and swollen and sore. X "

Ouchies. I hope you returned the favour to his balls

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not the most delicate person when shaving, think sheep shearing.

Once there was a slip of the blade it hurt to wee for a few days "

Yep, this for me, too. Sliced myself pretty good.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *s_macWoman  over a year ago

Traffic land

I'd made an appt with my lovely waxing lady. She was off sick, so her boss took the appointment instead. I came away rather bruised, her technique really wasn't all that

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"I'd made an appt with my lovely waxing lady. She was off sick, so her boss took the appointment instead. I came away rather bruised, her technique really wasn't all that "

Yikes, I bet she didn't even give you a discount pffft

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Bruised my cervix when I accidentally kicked my vibrator up myself. Had just inserted it and had my feet in the air trying to smooth my blanket out and my heel slipped and whacked the dildo right up inside me!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


" Bruised my cervix when I accidentally kicked my vibrator up myself. Had just inserted it and had my feet in the air trying to smooth my blanket out and my heel slipped and whacked the dildo right up inside me!"

Cor blimey, that's made me wince.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *s_macWoman  over a year ago

Traffic land

[Removed by poster at 07/06/17 11:39:49]

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


" Bruised my cervix when I accidentally kicked my vibrator up myself. Had just inserted it and had my feet in the air trying to smooth my blanket out and my heel slipped and whacked the dildo right up inside me!"

Fuck that even made me wince a bit reading it

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I burnt myself with my glass dildo a few weeks ago

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"I burnt myself with my glass dildo a few weeks ago "

You did. I remember it well

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I burnt myself with my glass dildo a few weeks ago

You did. I remember it well "

So do I

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *eardyBikerMan  over a year ago

nr stonehaven


" Bruised my cervix when I accidentally kicked my vibrator up myself. Had just inserted it and had my feet in the air trying to smooth my blanket out and my heel slipped and whacked the dildo right up inside me!"

I stopped reading at kick

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *a Fee VerteWoman  over a year ago

Limbo


"Bought a new flogger and after having a play with it, mr was a bit over zealous and I ended up very red, and swollen and sore. X "

In a similar vein, I've ended up peeing blood a couple of times after being slapped 'too hard and too long' (though it didn't feel like it at the time) and after getting checked out just in case of any underlying issue have had to confess to 'over enthusiastic sex' at the doctor's when the nurse was puzzling over my symptoms with no sign of any infection.

I also managed, while playing, to half rip out an internal polyp that I was waiting to get removed - which didn't hurt but resulted in a ridiculous amount of blood (for weeks)

And my VCH bar has ended up stuck in the gap between someone's front teeth which wasn't much fun either

Finally ... if you're ever (stupidly) tempted to use sun cream as an impromptu substitute lube, don't, just don't, because it burns like hell!! (I was much younger in my defence ...)

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Bought a new flogger and after having a play with it, mr was a bit over zealous and I ended up very red, and swollen and sore. X

In a similar vein, I've ended up peeing blood a couple of times after being slapped 'too hard and too long' (though it didn't feel like it at the time) and after getting checked out just in case of any underlying issue have had to confess to 'over enthusiastic sex' at the doctor's when the nurse was puzzling over my symptoms with no sign of any infection.

I also managed, while playing, to half rip out an internal polyp that I was waiting to get removed - which didn't hurt but resulted in a ridiculous amount of blood (for weeks)

And my VCH bar has ended up stuck in the gap between someone's front teeth which wasn't much fun either

Finally ... if you're ever (stupidly) tempted to use sun cream as an impromptu substitute lube, don't, just don't, because it burns like hell!! (I was much younger in my defence ...)"

You're like an episode of 'sex sent me to ER'

Be careful!!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Bought a new flogger and after having a play with it, mr was a bit over zealous and I ended up very red, and swollen and sore. X

In a similar vein, I've ended up peeing blood a couple of times after being slapped 'too hard and too long' (though it didn't feel like it at the time) and after getting checked out just in case of any underlying issue have had to confess to 'over enthusiastic sex' at the doctor's when the nurse was puzzling over my symptoms with no sign of any infection.

I also managed, while playing, to half rip out an internal polyp that I was waiting to get removed - which didn't hurt but resulted in a ridiculous amount of blood (for weeks)

And my VCH bar has ended up stuck in the gap between someone's front teeth which wasn't much fun either

Finally ... if you're ever (stupidly) tempted to use sun cream as an impromptu substitute lube, don't, just don't, because it burns like hell!! (I was much younger in my defence ...)"

You made me wince 4 separate times

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"And my VCH bar has ended up stuck in the gap between someone's front teeth which wasn't much fun either "

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I once burned my rectum with deep heat.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"I once burned my rectum with deep heat. "

Smelt good tho! I love the whiff of deep heat

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Oh goodness.

Also, the time myself and an ex girlfriend ordered a strap on thing which was a big dildo attached to latex pants which had free cheap lube. So my ex covers it with the lube and tries to enter me... as soon as it got the slightest bit inside me, the inside of my vagina burnt and stung unbearably. It turns out I'm EXTREMELY sensitive to most lubes.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *iss.HoneyWoman  over a year ago

...

Durex tingle and a freshly shaven foof do not mesh well.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Bought a new flogger and after having a play with it, mr was a bit over zealous and I ended up very red, and swollen and sore. X

In a similar vein, I've ended up peeing blood a couple of times after being slapped 'too hard and too long' (though it didn't feel like it at the time) and after getting checked out just in case of any underlying issue have had to confess to 'over enthusiastic sex' at the doctor's when the nurse was puzzling over my symptoms with no sign of any infection.

I also managed, while playing, to half rip out an internal polyp that I was waiting to get removed - which didn't hurt but resulted in a ridiculous amount of blood (for weeks)

And my VCH bar has ended up stuck in the gap between someone's front teeth which wasn't much fun either

Finally ... if you're ever (stupidly) tempted to use sun cream as an impromptu substitute lube, don't, just don't, because it burns like hell!! (I was much younger in my defence ...)"

Ouch x

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Oh goodness.

Also, the time myself and an ex girlfriend ordered a strap on thing which was a big dildo attached to latex pants which had free cheap lube. So my ex covers it with the lube and tries to enter me... as soon as it got the slightest bit inside me, the inside of my vagina burnt and stung unbearably. It turns out I'm EXTREMELY sensitive to most lubes. "

I think it's quite common. I can't use Ann Summers liquid satin. Sets me alight

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *eliWoman  over a year ago

.

Errrm. This thread has made me

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Oh goodness.

Also, the time myself and an ex girlfriend ordered a strap on thing which was a big dildo attached to latex pants which had free cheap lube. So my ex covers it with the lube and tries to enter me... as soon as it got the slightest bit inside me, the inside of my vagina burnt and stung unbearably. It turns out I'm EXTREMELY sensitive to most lubes.

I think it's quite common. I can't use Ann Summers liquid satin. Sets me alight "

Argh! *crosses legs*

Even Lovehoney lube burns if I use too much, the only type I've found which really works for me is Liquid Silk.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Using a wand on my clit. It seemed to overheat my piercing burning me. ....

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Oh goodness.

Also, the time myself and an ex girlfriend ordered a strap on thing which was a big dildo attached to latex pants which had free cheap lube. So my ex covers it with the lube and tries to enter me... as soon as it got the slightest bit inside me, the inside of my vagina burnt and stung unbearably. It turns out I'm EXTREMELY sensitive to most lubes.

I think it's quite common. I can't use Ann Summers liquid satin. Sets me alight

Argh! *crosses legs*

Even Lovehoney lube burns if I use too much, the only type I've found which really works for me is Liquid Silk."

And then for a week after it's like you're walking round with sandpaper up yer chuff, praying for moisture from the vag gods. You wanna do a rain dance but it hurts too much

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I was once sitting having a nice leisurely lunch with my friend when she looked at me quite matter of factly and said "oh, I cut my clit shaving"

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Using a wand on my clit. It seemed to overheat my piercing burning me. .... "

I haven't experienced that luckily, but wands can get very warm indeed

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Oh goodness.

Also, the time myself and an ex girlfriend ordered a strap on thing which was a big dildo attached to latex pants which had free cheap lube. So my ex covers it with the lube and tries to enter me... as soon as it got the slightest bit inside me, the inside of my vagina burnt and stung unbearably. It turns out I'm EXTREMELY sensitive to most lubes.

I think it's quite common. I can't use Ann Summers liquid satin. Sets me alight

Argh! *crosses legs*

Even Lovehoney lube burns if I use too much, the only type I've found which really works for me is Liquid Silk.

And then for a week after it's like you're walking round with sandpaper up yer chuff, praying for moisture from the vag gods. You wanna do a rain dance but it hurts too much "

That genuinely did almost make me cry with laughter then!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"I was once sitting having a nice leisurely lunch with my friend when she looked at me quite matter of factly and said "oh, I cut my clit shaving"

"

Erm... why was she shaving her clit?

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I was once sitting having a nice leisurely lunch with my friend when she looked at me quite matter of factly and said "oh, I cut my clit shaving"

Erm... why was she shaving her clit?"

Haha! She got a bit close whilst shaving her pubes, nicked the tip right off

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"

And then for a week after it's like you're walking round with sandpaper up yer chuff, praying for moisture from the vag gods. You wanna do a rain dance but it hurts too much

That genuinely did almost make me cry with laughter then!"

You've clearly been there!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I was once sitting having a nice leisurely lunch with my friend when she looked at me quite matter of factly and said "oh, I cut my clit shaving"

Erm... why was she shaving her clit?

Haha! She got a bit close whilst shaving her pubes, nicked the tip right off "

Fuck

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

And then for a week after it's like you're walking round with sandpaper up yer chuff, praying for moisture from the vag gods. You wanna do a rain dance but it hurts too much

That genuinely did almost make me cry with laughter then!

You've clearly been there! "

Maybe

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"I was once sitting having a nice leisurely lunch with my friend when she looked at me quite matter of factly and said "oh, I cut my clit shaving"

Erm... why was she shaving her clit?

Haha! She got a bit close whilst shaving her pubes, nicked the tip right off "

It's not a finger oh dear God that sounds like hell. Can you imagine wiping after a pee?

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Playing with a gent, he took a mouthful of jd and then went down on me. HELL FIRE I was in the shower quicker than a whippet after a rabbit!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I was in a very important business meeting once being highly professional when I felt something on my ankle. Looked down to see a panty liner escape from my trouser leg into my shoe. Unfortunately so did everyone else.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Playing with a gent, he took a mouthful of jd and then went down on me. HELL FIRE I was in the shower quicker than a whippet after a rabbit! "

Definitely taken note of that one!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"I was in a very important business meeting once being highly professional when I felt something on my ankle. Looked down to see a panty liner escape from my trouser leg into my shoe. Unfortunately so did everyone else. "

I threw on a pair of trackies to run to the shop.... the previous days knickers fell out the leg.

Onto your shoe though

I'm crying.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *a Fee VerteWoman  over a year ago

Limbo

If nothing else, this thread's ensuring I do my pelvic floor exercises today because each subsequent post is making me automatically clench!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *appy squirrelWoman  over a year ago

Norwich

drive in the car (no air con) for hours with open window and no knickers to cool things down... had a sore pussy for days afterwards. turns out too much wind on your pussy is just as bad as on your neck and gives you the equivalent of a stiff neck...

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"If nothing else, this thread's ensuring I do my pelvic floor exercises today because each subsequent post is making me automatically clench! "

Yay! Unexpected positive

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"drive in the car (no air con) for hours with open window and no knickers to cool things down... had a sore pussy for days afterwards. turns out too much wind on your pussy is just as bad as on your neck and gives you the equivalent of a stiff neck..."

Well well well... that's something I'd have never ever thought of. Good call!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek

Had an ingrown hair that made my flap swell into a golf ball.

I have since copyrighted the term "golf ball flap" and shit.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

ive accidentally moved the razor sideways - ooooooooo very sore

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Caught my flap in the epilator once. That hurt. A lot.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Caught my flap in the epilator once. That hurt. A lot. "

Fooooooooook that

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"ive accidentally moved the razor sideways - ooooooooo very sore "

A lot of us have shaving injuries. It's like the female version of trapping your cock in your flies. We need to take more care!!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

these have made me weak!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


" these have made me weak!"

It is rather informative, clenchy, and funny

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Durex tingle and a freshly shaven foof do not mesh well."

Missed that one earlier.

Duly noted!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Errrm. This thread has made me "

Come on Meli, share a foofy fail

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"I'm not the most delicate person when shaving, think sheep shearing.

Once there was a slip of the blade it hurt to wee for a few days

Yep, this for me, too. Sliced myself pretty good. "

Did it put you off for a while and need a hedge trimmer a few weeks later?

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *andybeachWoman  over a year ago

In the middle

A friend of mine decided to trim her pubes before shaving, she grabbed some and snipped a chunk of her mons pubis off along with the hair

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Ms Myth bruised herself very delicate with her new wand once.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Me. I've burnt my balls with Nair.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"A friend of mine decided to trim her pubes before shaving, she grabbed some and snipped a chunk of her mons pubis off along with the hair "

Eeeeeeeeek

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Ms Myth bruised herself very delicate with her new wand once. "

I did that too. It's so annoying and frustrating.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Me. I've burnt my balls with Nair. "

I felt like Nelson from The Simpsons then.... Ha-Ha

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Had an ingrown hair that made my flap swell into a golf ball.

I have since copyrighted the term "golf ball flap" and shit."

I had a massive sore puss filled ingrown hair right in the thigh foof crease a couple of months ago.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Had an ingrown hair that made my flap swell into a golf ball.

I have since copyrighted the term "golf ball flap" and shit.

I had a massive sore puss filled ingrown hair right in the thigh foof crease a couple of months ago. "

Fucking kill don't they.

Find yourself praying to the medic gods to remove this hell sore from the depths of your foof crease because it really is rather uncomfortable and a blinking eye sore.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ELLONS AND CREAMWoman  over a year ago

stourbridge area

Fools fall .....?.... my eye sight ...I need to go to spec savers ... really I do .

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Fools fall .....?.... my eye sight ...I need to go to spec savers ... really I do ."

Oooooo get a Dame Edna Everage pair

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Had an ingrown hair that made my flap swell into a golf ball.

I have since copyrighted the term "golf ball flap" and shit.

I had a massive sore puss filled ingrown hair right in the thigh foof crease a couple of months ago.

Fucking kill don't they.

Find yourself praying to the medic gods to remove this hell sore from the depths of your foof crease because it really is rather uncomfortable and a blinking eye sore. "

Oh yes they do! The worse part being that you can't use a pin to dig the hair out as it's simply not the most visible place. And every time I drained it, it just got more sore

Though it didn't scar

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ubSirVient-DefinitionCouple  over a year ago

dukinfield

Me and sub were once playing about and I got two very similar shaped bottles at the side of the bed mixed up in a dimly lit session. One bottle was baby oil the other was make up remover!

I think you know where I'm going with this........

AJ

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Me and sub were once playing about and I got two very similar shaped bottles at the side of the bed mixed up in a dimly lit session. One bottle was baby oil the other was make up remover!

I think you know where I'm going with this........

AJ "

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ellowbabesCouple  over a year ago

newport/cwmbran

Not so much a fail on my part, but ant bites on my foof hurt like hell....never again in long grass!!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


" Bruised my cervix when I accidentally kicked my vibrator up myself. Had just inserted it and had my feet in the air trying to smooth my blanket out and my heel slipped and whacked the dildo right up inside me!"

Sounds painful, I'd happily be on hand to retrieve it tho

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Not so much a fail on my part, but ant bites on my foof hurt like hell....never again in long grass!! "

Again... I've just learned another lesson! Thanks for sharing

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ady LickWoman  over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

I decided to go commando to work a while ago and caught my pubes in my trouser zip. That made my eyes water!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Some of these are making me wince and my balls to shrivel up at the very thought. Glad to see it's not just us men getting our dangly bits battered.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Some of these are making me wince and my balls to shrivel up at the very thought. Glad to see it's not just us men getting our dangly bits battered. "

Ooooo I could crush a grape

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"I decided to go commando to work a while ago and caught my pubes in my trouser zip. That made my eyes water! "

You know what I find disturbing about that?... you still need to unzip and free the fluff. It's gotta hurt.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Some of these are making me wince and my balls to shrivel up at the very thought. Glad to see it's not just us men getting our dangly bits battered.

Ooooo I could crush a grape "

You're showing your age there, Stu Francis wasn't it way back in the 80's. Remember it well.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Some of these are making me wince and my balls to shrivel up at the very thought. Glad to see it's not just us men getting our dangly bits battered.

Ooooo I could crush a grape

You're showing your age there, Stu Francis wasn't it way back in the 80's. Remember it well. "

Shhhhhhh

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *airymagicWoman  over a year ago

goblin city

I get carried away with plus size willies, end up riddled with stomach ache or triggering a bleed

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *appy squirrelWoman  over a year ago

Norwich

used to get yeast infections fairly regularly. .. anyone knows how bad that itches? now I am not a very classy person but I very much struggled to maintain my dignity in public

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Why did I read this thread ?

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Why did I read this thread ? "

Morbid curiosity?

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Why did I read this thread ? "

Have your nuts hidden in your tummy?

You should try the man wang thread

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Why did I read this thread ?

Have your nuts hidden in your tummy?

You should try the man wang thread "

Do I need to follow the arrow??

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Why did I read this thread ?

Have your nuts hidden in your tummy?

You should try the man wang thread

Do I need to follow the arrow??"

Yep

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Why did I read this thread ?

Have your nuts hidden in your tummy?

You should try the man wang thread

Do I need to follow the arrow??

Yep "

Sumthin

Sumthin

BJ

Sumthin

Washing Machine

Sumthin

Tunes

Yaaaay

Oooh

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Why did I read this thread ?

Have your nuts hidden in your tummy?

You should try the man wang thread

Do I need to follow the arrow??

Yep

Sumthin

Sumthin

BJ

Sumthin

Washing Machine

Sumthin

Tunes

Yaaaay

Oooh"

Just type in man wang in the forum search ya divvy nut

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Why did I read this thread ?

Have your nuts hidden in your tummy?

You should try the man wang thread

Do I need to follow the arrow??

Yep

Sumthin

Sumthin

BJ

Sumthin

Washing Machine

Sumthin

Tunes

Yaaaay

Oooh

Just type in man wang in the forum search ya divvy nut "

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *workoutMan  over a year ago

Cradley Heath

GOLF BALL FLAP

That is all.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"GOLF BALL FLAP

That is all."

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *workoutMan  over a year ago

Cradley Heath

It's along similar lines but I had a woman give me a fat lip while I was going down on her, her hips bucked and she foof smacked me right in the face

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *s_macWoman  over a year ago

Traffic land


"It's along similar lines but I had a woman give me a fat lip while I was going down on her, her hips bucked and she foof smacked me right in the face "

Foof smacked

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"It's along similar lines but I had a woman give me a fat lip while I was going down on her, her hips bucked and she foof smacked me right in the face

Foof smacked

"

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *inkyfun2013Couple  over a year ago

lewisham

When Mr Kinky and I were 'new' one of us decided it would be lovely and intimate if he waxed me. It wasn't lovely or intimate or romantic or fun. It was 2 hours of excruciating, frustrating pain. The wax got everywhere and my fanny looked like a baboon's arse by the end. To be fair, he was more upset than me but it never happened again! I may forgive but I don't forget!!!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *appy squirrelWoman  over a year ago

Norwich


"When Mr Kinky and I were 'new' one of us decided it would be lovely and intimate if he waxed me. It wasn't lovely or intimate or romantic or fun. It was 2 hours of excruciating, frustrating pain. The wax got everywhere and my fanny looked like a baboon's arse by the end. To be fair, he was more upset than me but it never happened again! I may forgive but I don't forget!!!"

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *hortieWoman  over a year ago

Northampton

Was super horny one day having a play with a vibrator and.. forgot I had a tampon in. Mr at the time was not amused as he hated me playing with toys, and had to dig it out

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *iSTARessWoman  over a year ago

London

It's fun at the time but I've a low cervix and tend to suffer for a few days with bruising if playing with a big un.

Oh and having a coil fitted left me walking at a right angle for nearly a week

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Who knew having a foof is so hazardous? I can see a gap in the market (pardon the pun) for foof rescue service..

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"When Mr Kinky and I were 'new' one of us decided it would be lovely and intimate if he waxed me. It wasn't lovely or intimate or romantic or fun. It was 2 hours of excruciating, frustrating pain. The wax got everywhere and my fanny looked like a baboon's arse by the end. To be fair, he was more upset than me but it never happened again! I may forgive but I don't forget!!!"

I bet it was on fire

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Was super horny one day having a play with a vibrator and.. forgot I had a tampon in. Mr at the time was not amused as he hated me playing with toys, and had to dig it out "

They have to earn their keep somehow!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"It's fun at the time but I've a low cervix and tend to suffer for a few days with bruising if playing with a big un.

Oh and having a coil fitted left me walking at a right angle for nearly a week "

Wincing

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ullswapcouple30Couple  over a year ago

Valleys

I once stood on a swivel chair and it collapsed on me

Stitches in foof, took weeks to heal ! Ouch!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ink Panther.Woman  over a year ago

Preston

Too much rabbit action, ended up with a UTI ouch

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"I once stood on a swivel chair and it collapsed on me

Stitches in foof, took weeks to heal ! Ouch!"

Owwwww

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"Too much rabbit action, ended up with a UTI ouch "

I had one where I was a day or so from being hospitalised coz it was hitting my kidneys (UTI) I had no idea it could be so serious.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *ink Panther.Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"Too much rabbit action, ended up with a UTI ouch

I had one where I was a day or so from being hospitalised coz it was hitting my kidneys (UTI) I had no idea it could be so serious. "

Incredibly serious left untreated

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Had an ingrown hair that made my flap swell into a golf ball.

I have since copyrighted the term "golf ball flap" and shit."

I've had this too. Was so painful I was walking funny.

Also hurt my cervix after some fairly vigorous sex, blood everywhere. Explaining that to the doc was interesting.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I was once giving the ex wife a good old fingering when I felt something deep inside her, after much rummaging and poking about I managed to punch it between two fingers and get it out. Turned out to be part of the clear plastic wrapper of a tampon, well that's what she said it was anyway.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek

How could I forget the guy that picked me up by my chuff?!

Yeah, claret everywhere. I ended up standing on my kitchen worktop. He'd lifted me and I had to climb off onto whatever was closest to take my weight, you know how you pull yourself out of a swimming pool.

Bad times.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"I was once giving the ex wife a good old fingering when I felt something deep inside her, after much rummaging and poking about I managed to punch it between two fingers and get it out. Turned out to be part of the clear plastic wrapper of a tampon, well that's what she said it was anyway. "

good job you found it!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"How could I forget the guy that picked me up by my chuff?!

Yeah, claret everywhere. I ended up standing on my kitchen worktop. He'd lifted me and I had to climb off onto whatever was closest to take my weight, you know how you pull yourself out of a swimming pool.

Bad times. "

But why....Ouch

I've slipped while doing doggy, causing me to go in deeper and at the wrong angle. I hit her cervix. She wasn't impressed and walked funny that day

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

 

By *rincess peach OP   Woman  over a year ago

shits creek


"How could I forget the guy that picked me up by my chuff?!

Yeah, claret everywhere. I ended up standing on my kitchen worktop. He'd lifted me and I had to climb off onto whatever was closest to take my weight, you know how you pull yourself out of a swimming pool.

Bad times.

But why....Ouch

I've slipped while doing doggy, causing me to go in deeper and at the wrong angle. I hit her cervix. She wasn't impressed and walked funny that day "

It was his fingers he lifted me with too. It was so fucking painful.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

  

By *igerlilycubWoman  over a year ago

Lancashire

I cut my lip shaving my pussy. Stung like hell and bled for ages.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

» Add a new message to this topic

0.1405

0