FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Head or heart
Head or heart
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you generally follow your head or heart? I'm trying to follow my head but doing battle with myself over what my heart is saying  "
I usually follow my head as even though my heart is telling me something it's not that easy. The head is usually the sensible option, but sensible can be boring. I am in a head/heart struggle at the moment too |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you generally follow your head or heart? I'm trying to follow my head but doing battle with myself over what my heart is saying "
oh my youre in love with a swinger |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i wanna follow my heart but my head is keeping me in check..
im only hurting myself by potentially falling for someone i cant have..
im just enjoying whatever it is for however long it lasts |
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My head and heart have an open and honest relationship, so everything is discussed between them and any decision made is not in conflict with each other. Backed up with good instincts and not regretting decisions makes for a simpler decision making process.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Do you generally follow your head or heart? I'm trying to follow my head but doing battle with myself over what my heart is saying oh my youre in love with a swinger "
Ha ha no. I'm the swinger. I want him to be ha ha  but that's not what I'm battling with. This man has been very disrespectful to me in the past but claims he's a changed man......... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Ha ha I have laughed and enjoyed reading these replays but DAMN it's about an equal split......no better off in my quandary.
The heart or the head hmmmmmmm  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ha ha I have laughed and enjoyed reading these replays but DAMN it's about an equal split......no better off in my quandary.
The heart or the head hmmmmmmm "
They have coin flip simulators if you really can't make up your mind. Feelin' lucky? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Head... on this site and off it.
I have been in love just the once and after time it didnt work but I was never heartbroken over the split, only heartbroken whilst in the marriage.
Its far easier to follow your heart I believe but thats when you can sometimes end up badly hurt and the pain just wont go away. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Could your heart get broken?"
It has been bruised battered and broken but to trust to dare to dream to hope for more is always better...
Then cold cynical calculation than chasing a false logic that we believe we can rationalise that we delude ourselves provides a wall around us insulating us from others.
The head and heart work together to pretend otherwise is to forget our humanity.
So i will always take a chance follow my heart...and take the risk
My head can always find reasons to run away and hide in my man cave..
But the only things we ever regret are those we are to afraid to do...
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Your heart is emotional
Your head has the logic
And your gut is the right one
Always
Well it works for me "
Always?
Perhaps more heart less head more trust less research and daring to take a chance will always be better than over analysing and seeking the negatives? |
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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago
yumsville |
"Do you generally follow your head or heart? I'm trying to follow my head but doing battle with myself over what my heart is saying oh my youre in love with a swinger
Ha ha no. I'm the swinger. I want him to be ha ha but that's not what I'm battling with. This man has been very disrespectful to me in the past but claims he's a changed man........."
So you want to introduce a guy that has been disrespectful to you into swinging. Swinging and the concept of multiple partners is difficult for the average person to understand never mind someone that might not have your respect. Why you would risk being the subject ridicule (in whatever form), only you can decide, though labelling women and their sexual activity is a very easy one should someone want to. |
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I've been told if you flip a coin, that when it's in the air you'll suddenly realise what side you want it to come down on. Don't know if that'll help..
My lesson to learn today is, leopards don't change their spots, my head agrees, but my heart is valiantly trying to persuade me otherwise  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As a woman it's easier to follow your heart. It's what I've lived my life by, following my heart and my emotions. This isn't going to work in here- you get emotions mixed in with hormones and it's a heady mess.
Stick to what you came here for (sex and friendship?) and leave the love and hearts out of it
(Assuming that's what your referring to?) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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It's not someone off here. Currently I am a single swinger. We have history. We had a child together (he didn't want baby. I did) he didn't see him for a while and ignored all my attempts at contact (the disrespectful bit) but now he's on the scene again and says he wants me. My head can't forget. My heart still holds the feelings for him. I want to be a swinger. He has no idea.........head or heart?????? Lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's not someone off here. Currently I am a single swinger. We have history. We had a child together (he didn't want baby. I did) he didn't see him for a while and ignored all my attempts at contact (the disrespectful bit) but now he's on the scene again and says he wants me. My head can't forget. My heart still holds the feelings for him. I want to be a swinger. He has no idea.........head or heart?????? Lol "
oh wow thats a mind fuck.. i was never romantically involved with my childs father.. but thats a huge factor in your situation. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's not someone off here. Currently I am a single swinger. We have history. We had a child together (he didn't want baby. I did) he didn't see him for a while and ignored all my attempts at contact (the disrespectful bit) but now he's on the scene again and says he wants me. My head can't forget. My heart still holds the feelings for him. I want to be a swinger. He has no idea.........head or heart?????? Lol "
I feel he's shown his true colours by being disrespectful and not wanting cintact with you after the orthodox if your baby. Do leopards change their spots? Not usually. It's a really tough one but I'm sure whatever you decide will be right for you. Don't rush anything whatever you decide x |
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"It's not someone off here. Currently I am a single swinger. We have history. We had a child together (he didn't want baby. I did) he didn't see him for a while and ignored all my attempts at contact (the disrespectful bit) but now he's on the scene again and says he wants me. My head can't forget. My heart still holds the feelings for him. I want to be a swinger. He has no idea.........head or heart?????? Lol "
Your heart should be telling you to run a mile - if he abandoned his child and blanked you he has a heart of stone and is not to be trusted IMO.
You're young enough to find a good man and make a good life for yourself, keep looking! |
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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago
yumsville |
"It's not someone off here. Currently I am a single swinger. We have history. We had a child together (he didn't want baby. I did) he didn't see him for a while and ignored all my attempts at contact (the disrespectful bit) but now he's on the scene again and says he wants me. My head can't forget. My heart still holds the feelings for him. I want to be a swinger. He has no idea.........head or heart?????? Lol
Your heart should be telling you to run a mile - if he abandoned his child and blanked you he has a heart of stone and is not to be trusted IMO.
You're young enough to find a good man and make a good life for yourself, keep looking! "
So he has a heart of stone? I may be missing something completely today.
She got pregnant despite him not wanting a baby. Yes he left without contact or support which I am not condoning but despite this she is wanting to sleep with others which he doesn't yet know about, and you think this is going to be the basis of a respectful, ongoing supportive relationship. One where from the outset she is putting him first again?
Two replies here have put the guy down in quick succession, though she is the one where she admits to having a baby without his consent and the one who wants to sleep with others above building her relationship with him. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's not someone off here. Currently I am a single swinger. We have history. We had a child together (he didn't want baby. I did) he didn't see him for a while and ignored all my attempts at contact (the disrespectful bit) but now he's on the scene again and says he wants me. My head can't forget. My heart still holds the feelings for him. I want to be a swinger. He has no idea.........head or heart?????? Lol
Your heart should be telling you to run a mile - if he abandoned his child and blanked you he has a heart of stone and is not to be trusted IMO.
You're young enough to find a good man and make a good life for yourself, keep looking!
So he has a heart of stone? I may be missing something completely today.
She got pregnant despite him not wanting a baby. Yes he left without contact or support which I am not condoning but despite this she is wanting to sleep with others which he doesn't yet know about, and you think this is going to be the basis of a respectful, ongoing supportive relationship. One where from the outset she is putting him first again?
Two replies here have put the guy down in quick succession, though she is the one where she admits to having a baby without his consent and the one who wants to sleep with others above building her relationship with him."
It was not only down to me that the baby was created. I am not responsible for where he cums knowing full well I wasn't on the pill. We weren't together when baby was conceived but had been prior. I'm not condoning his behaviour at all but o understand why he did it for reasons which I won't go in to. I never expected him to want me again. It took me ages to get over him but in that time I healed from years of life being a bitch and found that swinging is what I want in any future relationships. I know he's a good fella deep down or I would of disowned him a long time ago baby or not.........he may well be up for swinging but if not it could open pandoras box for me   |
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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago
yumsville |
"It's not someone off here. Currently I am a single swinger. We have history. We had a child together (he didn't want baby. I did) he didn't see him for a while and ignored all my attempts at contact (the disrespectful bit) but now he's on the scene again and says he wants me. My head can't forget. My heart still holds the feelings for him. I want to be a swinger. He has no idea.........head or heart?????? Lol
Your heart should be telling you to run a mile - if he abandoned his child and blanked you he has a heart of stone and is not to be trusted IMO.
You're young enough to find a good man and make a good life for yourself, keep looking!
So he has a heart of stone? I may be missing something completely today.
She got pregnant despite him not wanting a baby. Yes he left without contact or support which I am not condoning but despite this she is wanting to sleep with others which he doesn't yet know about, and you think this is going to be the basis of a respectful, ongoing supportive relationship. One where from the outset she is putting him first again?
Two replies here have put the guy down in quick succession, though she is the one where she admits to having a baby without his consent and the one who wants to sleep with others above building her relationship with him.
It was not only down to me that the baby was created. I am not responsible for where he cums knowing full well I wasn't on the pill. We weren't together when baby was conceived but had been prior. I'm not condoning his behaviour at all but o understand why he did it for reasons which I won't go in to. I never expected him to want me again. It took me ages to get over him but in that time I healed from years of life being a bitch and found that swinging is what I want in any future relationships. I know he's a good fella deep down or I would of disowned him a long time ago baby or not.........he may well be up for swinging but if not it could open pandoras box for me "
Well it sounds like you've made your mind up about getting back together with him.
It's confusing though as you say he would not reply to your attempts to contact, though now say you would have disowned him years ago..?
Why anyone would put swinging into the mix of an unstable relationship is unfathomable.
A general (lighthearted) thread on following your heart has show two sides of the coin are essential.
Best of luck.  |
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